
It’s no secret I peek at Reddit when I’m working weekends. But last week its contributors made something too hilarious not to share: An extremely dark view of relationships, in the context of Super Mario Bros.
Around Wednesday a user kicked it all off with “Mario Explains It: Lesson 001.” (Above) The guy was clearly going all Mr. Bitterpants over the state of a just-friends relationship with some girl who is probably never, ever going to give it up for him. It was then followed up with many pictures and revisions. Here are the ones that were the funniest while still forming a logical progression:
Here’s a “Fixed that for you” from someone even more bitter.

The third picture shows the OP how to git ‘er done.

Uh, staying “just friends” now sounds like a pretty good idea, doesn’t it?

Smoker!!!!! Reloading!

Of course, there’s always this path. I’d probably make supersize Bullet Bob into a divorce lawyer.

And finally, for those who hate counseling, the Scott Peterson option.

And so we learned an important lesson today, didn’t we kids? That’s right. Never ever never have sex with anyone you care about…
Mario Explains It [Reddit]


















Jeff
Friday, February 6, 2009 at 10:55 AMWow. This is a bleak view of relationships, but it sure is funny.
Lucky
Friday, February 6, 2009 at 4:33 PMfuck i lost the game
Kraeugolnikov
Saturday, February 7, 2009 at 6:34 AMMexican soviets appreciate it..)
chavela
Saturday, February 7, 2009 at 9:50 AMSo if you didn’t think it was funny why take the time to make a note? I found it was note worthy….
horseshaq
Saturday, February 7, 2009 at 11:26 AMwhat’s the shovel for?
aweraw
Sunday, February 8, 2009 at 2:22 AM@biv
acctually, it’s banzai bill. douchewad
adlfjij
Monday, February 9, 2009 at 4:59 AMbahahha the smoker is hillarious. yay left4dead
Sladen Dead
Tuesday, February 10, 2009 at 8:42 AMFucing brilliant.
anonymous
Wednesday, February 11, 2009 at 2:02 PMthis is going on /b/
ginnnny
Thursday, February 12, 2009 at 4:02 PMI’m disappointed in you.
Kristie
Friday, February 13, 2009 at 2:47 PMSmoker, lol.
Marty
Sunday, February 15, 2009 at 4:55 AMTotally hilarious!!!
Kaliman
Wednesday, February 18, 2009 at 5:16 AMA great example of imagination. From 1 single idea look all the unexpected chit that happened. It also tells us that when you’ve blindly fallen in love you never believe that this chit can happen to you. lol
Arthur Protasio
Thursday, February 19, 2009 at 9:01 AMIngenious & Hilarious! :)
SevereFlame
Saturday, February 21, 2009 at 7:47 AMWhoever created this is a satirical genius.
Brittany
Monday, March 9, 2009 at 9:55 AMI wish I were you. Clever and hilarious!