
Heineken sent us a keg of beer. We want to give it away.
Yes, you did read that correctly.
We knew Heineken were going to send us a keg because they were pretty happy with the advertising campaign they’ve been running on the site. We also knew they hoped we’d post a photo of it and write about it. But we couldn’t work out how to write a post about beer that was relevant to video games.
When the keg arrived in the office, we thought it was pretty cool. So cool, in fact, that we didn’t want to drink it. So we decided to give it away. And that’s when we knew how to turn this into a proper Kotaku competition…
We want you to write a post that reveals the hidden link between beer and video games. You’ve got to write it in typical Kotaku style, as if your post were to actually appear on the site. You need a headline, at least one image, and no more than 200-300 words that ties together beer and gaming in appropriate fashion.
The best post will win the Heineken keg pictured above. And we’ll publish your post.
Email your entry to me by next Wednesday to be in the running.
iTipTop
May 14, 2009 at 10:10 AM
Beer… inventor of the video game industry?
We all know that one of the first video games was pong, that crazy little game where one line bounces a circle to the other line. Now in 1972, a time of MASSIVE SPACE EXPLORATION, disco and the formation of Black Sabbath who the hell would be trying to create machines that play tennis inside them? Obviously, a drunk bastard named Allan Alcorn. You give us a better reason on why in this time of magic and wonder you’d spend your time trapped in a dungeon creating a tennis game among all other possibilities besides BEER.
This trend goes on and on, a game… about a goddamn monkey throwing barrels at some plumber who wears red overalls? Beer all the way babe.
Beer = Good ideas = Video games.
Report PermalinkDean Longmore
May 14, 2009 at 11:03 AM
May I suggest amending the Terms and Conditions to stipulate 18+?
Report PermalinkJames Simpson
May 14, 2009 at 12:19 PM
Someone had to have been drinking *something* while designing some of the games we have out there. Mr. Mosquito, for example. ;)
Report PermalinkBlackwater
May 14, 2009 at 12:56 PM
David Wildgoose gets drunk on Xbox Live, talks to member of the opposite sex and is later filled with regret.
Recent studies have shown that the gap between alcoholism, stalking and gaming is slowly closing.
A study recently released by fakestats.com revealed that 99% of relationships that are the result of online interation in games such as World of Warcraft and Halo 3 have been the result of what is being referred to as DGO (Drunken Gaming Online).
David Wildgoose, a victim of DGO has since stated “It seemed like a good idea at the time, i mean, she had a sexy voice. How was I to know it was a man? Now she won’t stop spamming my Facebook and Xbox Live inbox with creepy ‘romantic’ poetry”
While the trend has had little effect on gaming in general at the moment, critics have speculated that warthog crashes and inebriated Marketplace purchases are likely to be on the rise.
It has also been speculated that 80% of Assassin’s Creed purchases were made by people who were of-their-face drunk. The other 20% was made by relatives who deep down hate the person they bought the game for.
A support group has been set up at: http://www.stopdrunkengaming.com
Report PermalinkGarrick Bortignon
May 14, 2009 at 1:19 PM
Hmm doesnt look lik mine didnt passed moderation :(
Report PermalinkDavid Wildgoose
May 14, 2009 at 1:22 PM
@Garrick Bortignon
Indeed. Feel free to try again though.
Report PermalinkBlackwater
May 14, 2009 at 2:04 PM
Forgot to include an image
http://webzoom.freewebs.com/bobby1970/A%20Seriously%20Drunk%20Redneck.jpg
Report PermalinkJoe Bloggs
May 14, 2009 at 6:31 PM
It says “e-mail your entry to me” people!
Report PermalinkDavid Wildgoose
May 14, 2009 at 7:24 PM
@Joe Bloggs
Thanks, Joe!
Report PermalinkBerettah
May 14, 2009 at 4:03 PM
4 words……The Legend of Neil
Report PermalinkDr_Stef
May 14, 2009 at 4:24 PM
Wow European Beer :)
Report PermalinkCracker
May 14, 2009 at 6:27 PM
Heineken sent us a keg of beer [i]we wanted to pass on the viral advertising[/i]
fixed…..
Report PermalinkJoshua Nash
May 14, 2009 at 9:21 PM
There is one distinct way that links beer and video games. One of the best games of all time, A Bard’s Tale. It features a very excellent song that goes like this:
A long time ago, way back in history,
When all they had to drink was nothing but cups of tea,
Along came a bloke by the name of Charlie Mopps,
And he invented a wonderful drink and he made it out of hops (hops hops hops hops, etc).
Chorus:
He ought to have been an Admiral, a Sultan or a King
And to his praises we shall always sing.
Look what he has done for us: he’s filled us with good cheer.
God bless Charlie Mopps, the man who invented beer.
Here in Chesterfield [substitute your own locale] we drink beer a lot.
Down Whittington Moor [ditto] on a Saturday night, the pace gets rather hot.
We’ll drink a half, or sometimes two, it’s cool and fresh and clear:
God bless Charlie Mopps, the man who invented beer.
Chorus
The Admiral, the Connaught, the Hole in the Wall as well;
No matter what their name is, it’s Charlie’s beer they sell.
So come along, my lively lads, at eleven o’clock they stop:
For five short seconds, remember Charlie Mopps. (One… two… three, four, five)
Chorus
and yes, someone definatly needs to ammend it so it is for 18+ only
Report Permalinkteedubb
May 14, 2009 at 11:03 PM
these heiniken kegs are great…. if you like drinking foam beer….
Report Permalink