That’s how the British Board of Film Classification describes the potentially objectionable content in next week’s downloadable episode for the Xbox 360 version of Grand Theft Auto IV. The potentially spoiler-filled rundown, as spotted by Eurogamer, is full of things that just might give you the vapours, the likes of which you’ve never seen in your computer games, I mean, my goodness.
The BBFC’s saucy description of the naughtiness of Gay Tony reads notes sex scenes that are “quite strong, but always masked and the characters concerned are invariably fully clothed” meaning no nudity.
However, “In cut scenes the Luis Lopez character is seen to be on the receiving end of oral sex (slumped on a chair with a woman’s head buried in his lap). The same character engages in sexual intercourse on at least two different occasions. For example he stands between a woman’s raised legs and thrusts into her and he also bends a woman over a desk and thrusts into her from the rear.” How ribald!
Of course, there’s mention of the excessive violence and the flaccid penises that you may also take offence to, but that’s all *yawn* pretty much expected at this point. But that thrusting! It sounds so delicious.