In Real Life

Microsoft Australia You BLOODY RIPPAH

Bloody oath, strewth ya gallahs. You won’t bloody believe what those rippers at Microsoft ‘Straya have done.

They’ve only bloody gone and offered true blue ‘Strayans the best ‘Straya Day present eva.


Can you believe this Jonno?

(Nah mate, it’s bloody unbelievable Marko)

If you get your arse quick smart into the Microsoft Store tomorrow Microsoft will turn your bloody Australian controller from this:

Into bloody well this ya bastards!

Bloody hell, Microsoft’s as smart as a dunny rat for coming up with that one, right Jonno?

(Right mate, it’s a bloody ripper Marko)

But Microsoft, while yer at it maybe you can put together a few different options — for us TRUE BLUE AUSSIES that want a bit of bloody variety in our controller?

My GOOD TRUE AUSSIE MATE Luke Plunkett has chucked these ones down the tubes.

Like this ya blood drongo — a true Aussie legend:

Or this:

Or this:

(Ay Marko mate, that’s a ripper)

Thanks Jonno. My mate Luke is as funny as a fart in an elevator with this shit.

Right ya bastards. I’m off to woolies for a few tinnies and a leg of lamb for the barbie. The boys are all coming round tomorrow. If we get a minute we’re gonna jump in the ute and get our bludging arses down to the Microsoft Store for some of this shit, right Jonno?

(Too bloody right Marko)

Bloody oath, flaming galah, what’s ya favourite colour — balooh?

Have you subscribed to Kotaku Australia's email newsletter? You can also follow us on Facebook, Twitter and YouTube.

Trending Stories Right Now