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So, Yeah, I Watched The Transformers Cartoon And...
Posted by Brian Ashcraft at 11:40 PM on April 10, 2008
To: Crecente
From: Bashcraft
RE: Transformers? Bah!
Boy, oh boy, did it stink. This has made me gun shy about pretty much everything I liked as a kid. Funny how memories can play tricks on you, huh? Rather, cruel.
What you missed last night
Every other effin' black video game character
Bay responds to "fucking retarded"
Japanese PlayStation Store renewal dated
Bad Company not win at all
Haze gets another release date
Bad Company drops weapons
Sony wants to know why you hack PSP
In Japan, when you want to send an important message and letters or email or faxes won't cut it, there is another option: The Pocket Monster Telegram. For only ¥2,100 ($US 20), residents of Western Japan can send Pokémon telegram trophies to each other. Think about it. That's magical.
Ah, the Cole Train. Not exactly the deepest of characters. Says Morgan Grey, Senior Producer at Crystal Dynamics:
Various European retailers are showing listings for a 
Mario Kart Wii comes with one pack-in Wii Wheel. But what if you'd like to get some 2 player Wii Wheeling on, that means an extra purchase. For those who don't want to shell out 
Lego Star Wars, Lego Indiana Jones, Lego Batman, you can see why they're made. Those kind of properties make money. Bubba Ho-Tep, on the other hand...the marketing possibilities are somewhat limited. Which doesn't bother mod-maker trepaning from putting together Bubba Lego-Tep, a mod that doesn't only take the Elvis v Mummy masterpiece and make a Lego game out of it, it's done via the Doom 3 engine. So strange. And by strange, I mean strangely fascinating. 
Maybe this is just a kwinky-dink. Who knows? Nintendo does! The 2008 Japanese Club Nintendo has a picture of Mario Kart Wii for April. And of course, Mario Kart Wii goes on sale in April. Taking this rubrick, let's look at December, which shows a picture of...
Heeeeey, it's Toro, Sony Computer Entertainment's kooky mascot cat. And his friends! And their new official line of action figures/desk paperweights. You may be ordering yours (as we speak!) as a devoted fan of all things PlayStation, but since the figures come with interchangeable faces, I'm ordering mine as a handy mood indicator. If Toro's happy, I'm happy. If he's sad, I'm sad. If he's that face on the far right, I'm...having toilet issues?
Michael Bay is a powerful man. He's not a fucking retard. So when Uwe Boll called Michael Bay a 
It's an interesting question. Telltale's own Bone died before its time, SiN did likewise, and most full game sequels come around faster than Half-Life 2's "episodes". So why, the, does Sam & Max stand as the only successful episodic series to date?
It's officially official. Today, a Sony press release states that the Japanese PSN Store is getting 
This month's Wired has a look at MMO Arden: The World of William Shakespeare. Armed with a $US 250,000 MacArthur Foundation grant, Indiana University profession Ted Castronova and his students created the MMO, which as the professor points out, was "no fun" and "failed." Castronova and his team and working on the game's sequel. He's learned from his experience and offers up these five tips on making academic games that don't suck:
If you've ever bought action figures or comics or anything like that on an auction site, there's a fair chance it's been graded/appraised by a third party. This lets the buyer know that someone who's not the seller has independently vouched for the quality of the item in question. Well, if you're selling or buying games, you've now got the same option, as the first games to have been examined by Video Game Authority have popped up on eBay over the past week. For $US 25, the VGA will grade your game, then seal it inside a hard plastic, tamper-proof shell, which instantly lets buyers know the condition of the game. Useless if you're just after a sealed copy of GTAIV (especially considering the $US 25 fee), but if your online purchasing habits lean more towards boxed copies of Chrono Trigger, this looks like its worth a look.
We've got a winner! That person wins!! And gets all my stuff!!! (Plus a neato Fallout 3 signed shirt.) That's right, as voted by Kotakuland, the winner of the Spring Cleaning Contest is Jonathan C., the individual who made this Portal egg. So Jonathan C., the individual who made this, shoot us an email at kotakucontestATgamilDOTcom to claim your prize. And congrats!
So EA & DICE have, 
Maids! No, wait. American maids! That's right, instead of reading about maids, you Americans can go visit them in America. Previously, a maid opened in Canada. Then it closed! And now, another maid cafe is giving North America a go.
Hear the one about the boy who cried Haze? Cried about a release date too many times, so when the game actually did appear, nobody believed him, and the game bombed at retail. Wise words. Those unable to heed the teachings of Aesop, however, may as well know that Ubisoft have announced a May 23 release date for Free Radical's very yellow shooter. That's for Europe. No date as of yet for the US or Australia, but if precedent's anything to go by, it shouldn't be too far off May 23.
Doesn't look like multiplayer chat DS game LOL is getting a bricks and mortal retail U.S. release. Known as Archime DS in Japan, the game is party game that has players think up challenges while the other players battle it out in a sexied-up Pictochat. The game goes good with booze. According to the game's US distributor Agetec, the game is "available only online." Not sure what that means exactly, but it sounds like it won't get a traditional retail release.
Daigasso! Band Brothers (ie Jam With The Band) was, early in its life, one of the DS's best games. Basically you and your DS-owning friends sat around and made beautiful music together. Sadly, it was never released outside of Japan. Anyway, it's got a sequel on the way. Called Daigasso! Band Brothers DX, it'll feature over 50 instruments (including the NES), 6-player wi-fi play and will be available in the US on May 26. Don't just circle that date, circle it in red.
So say Latino Review, who according to "multiple sources in Hollywood" tell him the Jarhead's not merely in the running, but that Disney have already offered him the role. On first thought, he seems more "nice" than "dashing/swarthy". But on second thought...yeah, this could work. He's an awfully pretty man, and the Prince is - at least in Sands of Time - an awfully pretty man. Put Jake in some MC Hammer pants and a wig, have him run up some walls and I'm sure he'll do just fine.
Alrighty! Since none of you bastards (I repeat none) are willing to cosplay as airplanes, we're going to change up this contest. And giveaway another copy of Ace Combat 6 in the process. That's right, we're giving away two copies of Ace Combat 6 to the winner and the runner-up. New contest: Make a three dimensional aeroplane out of anything tangible, but paper. So you can't make CGI planes! And you can't draw them either! But, you can make them out of anything else as long as it's not paper. Rocks, clay, toothpicks, whatever! And remember, that means make and not build a plastic plane model you bought in the store. Send entries to kotakucontestATgmailDOTcom. Remember, we're giving away two copies of the game and INTERNET FAME.
It may be lacking in Koopas, power ups and an underworld—not to mention the dreaded embedded MIDI soundtrack—but this Super Mario Bros. clone packed into 14 KB of Javascript is still damn impressive. Using no graphics, rendered entirely in compressed script, the exercise is definitely worth a few minutes of your time, even if the collision detection leaves a bit to be desired. It's only World 1-1, so you won't have to invest much time to get the gist, but a fantastic accomplishment regardless.
With the iPhone SDK out and about, quite a few developers and publishers are seriously considering 
Used games, the bane of publishers and the bread and butter of retailer GameStop, is a $US 1.3 billion business in the U.S. alone, reports research firm OTX. Their findings from the MI6 summit breaks down the used games biz, showing the buying habits of folks who dabble in the pre-owned, all of which is detailed at the report at Gamasutra.
Do you want to spend a weekend with 14,999 not-so-close friends participating in ferocious Age of Conan PVP combat? Are you willing to sign up for a GameSpot account to make this happen? Eidos and Funcom have just announced a unique beta partnership with GameSpot that will allow 15,000 players to participate in a special PVP weekend the 18th-20th of this month. Select players will be able to create a character using the game's character generator, which Funcom will then transform into a level 20 powerhouse. They can then enter PVP lobbies, chat, and kill each other. To sign up for a chance at a spot have have to first be a GameSpot member, and then fill out the application located at 
It's that Chopper motorcycle again! You know, the one we 
The BBC 
After the 
Rockstar has released a statement regarding the 
The engineers at Sony can't be too thrilled with fighting the constant battle against PSP hackers, issuing firmware updates that "strengthen security" in a futile attempt to curb piracy and homebrew applications. Going by a recent survey commissioned by Sony Computer Entertainment, passed on to us by a reader who was asked to take part, the company seems to be looking into the reasons why PSP owners are opening up their portables.
Grey drum pads? Cripplingly boring. Super Mario Bros. style mushroom drum pads? Oh, yes, please! This adorable little Rock Band drum controller mod is, I hope, the start of a trend, inspiring more custom controller art and hopefully fewer video game tattoos. Express yourself via pad, kids! There are plenty of photos on