Eberyone know Asians uses secret of orient to stay young and beautiful rooking.

berribrand

Before someone asks... it seems it's a fan made thing. But there are several stuff like that on the actual Moetan book series:
[s94913612.onlinehome.us]

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

Just added an YouTube video on my blog... if you don't want to go there, just watch it here. :P

Moetan teaches essencial english lesson on Moetan Corner (NSFW):

+ Watch video

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

YES! Thanks Bash.
<3 Moetan
[xspblog.com]

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

I've apparently been jaded by my years of anime. I cannot see the big deal here. Maybe because I know what Moetan is? Or that these screenshots are probably over in an instant because they are transformation scenes? Fairly standard fare for a transformation screen, sans the drooling duck.

On the other hand, I found the Moetan anime crossed the line one too many times (or actually several many times). Not to mention it just wasn't that good of an anime. And I had really hoped for a laughably large amount of Engrish.

TheWP

@taichi425: Sadly, no one will read your post man, they just see the second set of pics and judge on that.

Pretty screwed up since I could say the same thing about killing someone in all these fps games. You don't see anything and lable it straight porn...

Man I really hate some of these people who judge things as small as this.

Keanu

@mintycrys, @CausticSaint:
Thank you! Thank you for knowing what the hell Moetan actually is! Seriously guys, before you all go "OMG THAT GIRL'S DEFINITELY NOT 17!!!" why don't you look up what the source material actually is? One of the running jokes of the series is that she looks like a grade schooler while being "17".

Moetan, the books, have been quite the joke in the lower otaku world for a while now. The sentences and the way they "teach" are absolutley hysterical , grammatically correct but absolutley hysterical (I don't have the book with me but mintycrys' examples are all really good). Remember how we all laughed at English of the Dead because it was Engrishy? You can do the same with Moetan, just without the Engrish!

Also, for those interested in more Moetan, the "Teaching CDs" are really funny, Yukari Tamura (better known for her role as Nanoha in all of the Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha series) does Ink's (the main character's) voice (just like in the anime) and some of the lines are hilarious. Just think about a very Engrishy interpretation of the line: "You know, striped panties aren't very common in real life, are they?" then dip it pure saccharine and you've got a slight impression of what her impression of Ink sounds like.

taichi425

You know, not that these particular images appeal to me at all, but teaching with a porn reward sounds like it could work. I foresee a future where all learning is rewarded with porn.

cio

She's 17. That's legal in my state.

Woo.

Terance!

Hot.

munkah

@blueshoals: 30 kinds of awesome, one for every day of the month. And we're both bound for Hell for saying this. X3

The Great Moof

This is about 12 kinds of awesome.

One for every year.

blueshoals

@Proz:
Wait, a Kodomo no Jikan math game? That were sure as hell get everyone riled up around here. That series doesn't beat around the bush.

also
cute not pedo

tsukasa1288

Why has this become a lolicon discussion? As I recall, Moetan is better remembered as a funny book (for those of you who actually KNOW what I'm talking about, which, by the looks of it, is nobody) than child pr0n (awful TV series notwithstanding). YES, the books had nude loli transformation scenes. Do any of you know what plays at 11:00 on Sunday mornings on Japanese TV. THIS. And The first season of Ikki Tousen, as I recall. But this is nothing new in Japan, and this is the Japanese equivalent of Huggies commercials in America. Huggies commercials have baby ass and diaper fetishes! Oh noes! SCANDALOUS!

And to the guy that asked about whether or not they get the English right, they nail it. AND IT'S FUNNY.

mintycrys

The Japanese porn world is as sick as it gets.

lamusiqa

The FBI is going to confiscate my computer now.

Thanks, Kotaku.

Forkball

@GamerBunny: This is legal in Japan. People need to stop trying to impress their cultural standards on another country.

eastx

Sure she's 17... in duck years. Dirty little pedoduck.

B-Minus

Do not pass go,Do not collect 200 dollars. Just go to jail,because this is not simply jailbait. You know the risks when they are the size and shape of a five year old.

squirrel_enix

@Gannon: I feel like someone is trying to justify their own behavior as opposed to others.

GamerBunny

Is it wrong if I find sex stories between young children emotionally fulfilling? I dunno, I suppose it's a bit of an idealization, but I don't think there are any harmful impulses involved. Young (anime) girls are often just cute on a non-sexual level, as well.

So as far as loli goes, I'm often fairly receptive. I haven't seen all too much of Moetan (anime, books, anything) but I figure I'd find it good fun. I think I could handle her being 17 as well, as as far as I'm aware that detail is relevant to the plot. Not that I'm ever gonna get this, seeing as I don't live in Japan, but I don't see what the shitstorm is about.

Anyway, on the discussion Gannon seems to be having here: You're right, men's attraction to fertile girls is well justified evolutionarily, and most taboos associated with that are societal constructions. And there is indeed a pervasive effort on the part of women to overvalue their 'pussies', as you put it, since that's the reality of our economic world. On the other hand, though, I feel like that there is still so much potential within a 14 (or any such similar age) year old. As such, I'm not sure I could condone any laws or behaviour which would allow the possibility of distorting that potential by wielding economic power.

SolFalling

Dude, if you're horny for teenage girls its called pedophilia, there's no excusing it.
Dude, you are an idiot if you believe that. Google the word pedophilia, check out a dictionary. Pedophilia is the permanent attraction towards prepubescent children, that is according psychiatrists around 13. 14 year old girls are very fertile and bear healthy children. Sexual attraction towards them is normal and not deviant

Gannon

@Gannon: The bible is a good excuse for adult men to screw teenage girls? Holy shit, maybe in days of prehistory. And, way to go, you have JUST made it harder for sane Cristians like me to NOT earn the ire of America at the mere mention of the word "religion."

Dude, if you're horny for teenage girls its called pedophilia, there's no excusing it.

As for the game, I hate lolicon with a friggan passion. 17 my ass. The dude who makes the video that Bash posted, the guy who records his life in Japan, said there was supposedly a difference between cute and sexual when it comes to underage girls(someone tried explaining that to him). Unless someone can clarify for me, I think that line is really fuckin' distorted.

Garro

What? That girl is seventeen? Damn, puberty hits late in Japan.

Pantsman

Wow. I saw "maximum risky" and thought "eh, it's Moetan, how bad can it be?" Well, I don't follow Moetan but I guess I misjudged! Holy crap... The DS is getting the most risque console games since the Saturn! (WTF?)

@Channing:
Technically true. A "westerner" would often guess probably 2-4 years low for a kid and maybe 10 years low for an adult. Not this case though IMO, haha... though that argument reminds me of people on here I've heard say the DoA girls look 12, lol.

Anyway like I was going to say before being startled there... what I want is a Pixel Maritan DS English game!

Also... is that duck?

fuchikoma

@Channing: Hah, I was going to say the exact same thing - it definitely reminds me of the Sailor Moon transformation sequence.

Somebody posts a completely undetailed cartoon picture of a naked human child (I agree she doesn't look 17)... OMG america and Britain have a combined heart attack! WTF? These pictures aren't particularly sexual and given five minutes with Photoshop and a cartoon picture of a clothed human child, you could even make some yourself - no children or 17-year-olds need to be harmed.

@dr_lha: About the UK law. I'm concerned that the lynch-mob mentality also affects demands for this law. Frankly, drawn images should be entirely legal - for whatever sick, depraved and gross sexual acts people wish to draw. Bestiality? Child porn? Snuff? Anything. I don't care. It's a drawing, it doesn't harm anyone, and criminalising it is only half a step away from criminalising thought.

BUT they do claim that (not sure I believe it) this is actually being led by people who are doing what's essentially life drawings - taking a 'real' child porn photo, then doing a highly detailed drawing based on it. In that case, yes I agree these images can justifiably be banned because creating them involved the abuse of children. I don't think this should be generalised to include other images however.

quen

Aww the characters look so cute though!

ChiChi_BBQ

lol wut

Dopefish

Wasn't this news...last year? Moetan has (creepily) been around for quite a while, and a lot of peopel just get the game to make fun of it >_>

It be Engrish and even they know it.

masterage

@Powerlurker:
Also reason why it sold crap :P and reason why Moetan 3 became popular agian, aka they hired POP again to do the character design.

The first book was just awesome, own them all not to mention a lot more artbooks and doujinshis by POP (Electromagnetic wave) he sure know what MOE is :)

MugiMugi

I don't like the expression kids because while it also refers to teens and juveniles it sounds like it refers to children.
Child sex is a universal taboo, however teen sex is not. Teen sex is mainly a US taboo (tabu).
Women at around 14 are ready to have children and form families, but the boys their age are too young to finance a family. So the logical thing for teen girls is not to waste their fertility but to marry young twentysomething men. Adult men have married teen girls for thousands of years, just read the bible. All the Sarahs, Ruths and even the wholy Marry married at 13/14.
Gannon believes that true pedophilia is a serious crime. However, Gannon considers women aged 14 and up as juveniles and not as children.
By the way, does anybody know what Retro is up too? I haven't heard anything since their excellent MP3.

Gannon

?!?! ehhhh........ >_<

CenatorC

@CausticSaint:

Unfortunately, Moetan 2 has far less interesting (and more correct) example sentences and a much more normal storyline.

Powerlurker

On a note completely unrelated to the ongoing lolicon = evil debate that is repeated uncountable times on the internet, does anyone else think that the girl in question looks like she has a bit ... more than she should?

Bridget surprise?

ZekeSulastin

@Channing: Japanese look a lot younger than they are sometimes.

Sounds like an excuse for yourself to keep looking at this stuff.

NoBullet

@Gannon: Wow. You've got quite the thought out argument on why grown men should have sex with kids... congrats?

PENI_MASTA

@Calhoun: There is no such thing as too much internets. You always require moar.

Grinman

So... delicious.... *_*

... also, while this may be delicious and all, I'm pretty dissapointed everyone forgot about Moetan's foul-mouthed unassociated twin, Maritan~

ShikiMSHTS

I'm not sure if I remember you antiterra.
Dear Channing:
Feminists appeared in the late 19 century, advocating three main agendas:
1. Prohibition of alcohol
2. Prohibition of prostitution
3. Raising of age of consent and marriage from 12 to 16/18.

In general, feminists want to restrict a man's access to pussy and make pussy scarce to elevate its value. That's why feminists oppose prostitution, mail order brides and don't want man to have sex with teen girls. Why would a man marry a 30 year old careerwoman if he could marry a nice nubile estrogen smelling giggly 15 year old girl?
Also, fundamentalist christians support the feminists because they think sex is bad and want to outlaw nonmarital sex, but in reality they are stupid because the bible (and the torah) states literally that women can marry as soon as they become 13.

Gannon

@Gannon:
"The Feminists," you say? Please tell me more about this, I'm pretty curious.

Channing

@Gannon: Please, not again.

Antiterra

People here forget that age of consent is around 14 in most countries. Also, not that long ago 12 year old girls married 28 year old man, and that was that. Adult men have always had sexual interest in teen girls, and sadly the feminists have convinced the general US public that it is deviant for a young healthy man to have a sexual interest in a young fertile teen.

Gannon

@dr_lha: i think you meant to say "wtf is up with uk law?" (and u.s. law, which stands to get even worse than it already is if mccain gets elected, apparently). making the possession of sexualized drawings of children illegal is completely insane. what about all the renaissance/mannerist/baroque paintings of highly eroticized children? and what about balthus? and if you're going to go after visual art, what's stopping you from going after pop music (how many songs from the fifties and sixties had lyrics like "she's only 15..." blah blah blah)? it's somewhat interesting that such a huge part of western culture is based around the fetishization of the mythical 'child' (esp. in politics) and children (hannah montana, britney spears, etc), but to somehow overtly (and artistically) acknowledge this cultural preoccupation is a crime.

adaorardor

@Grinman: If you find it acceptable, perhaps you've sampled too much of the internets?

Calhoun

@w1ndwaker:
Japanese look a lot younger than they are sometimes.

Channing

That duck is the next pedobear.

ThaiGrocer

If you guys find this disturbing you obviously haven't sampled much of the internets.

Grinman

I'd imagine that most people on Kotaku haven't seen the Moetan books, which is too bad. They're utterly hysterical and nobody will ever learn any useful English from them. They do make great reading (for English speakers) though.

The level of English required to understand the sample sentences is way too advanced. No matter how simple the word may be, the example is overly complex.

A few examples:

Priest - "the priest has a cross-shaped bazooka."

Object - "he obstinately refuses to accept that rosebud games contain sexual objects.'

Expensive - "dahhhh!! Don't launch lots of expensive missiles too quickly!'

Decide - 'let's decide the supremacy of the Earth by the blows of robots.'

Request - 'the red queen requested them to strike his head off.'

Strict - 'the strict procedure is required to recall the dragon.'

I couldn't find my copy of the book to type this, so I grabbed these examples off a friend's page.

If you have the means (like ordering from amazon.jp) to get a copy for yourself, I strongly suggest you do so. ^.^

CausticSaint

Hmm...

So now I know what to get the creepy guy down the street for a house warming present...

JGab

I was going to say something about 17 not being jailbait in the UK . . . then I saw the image, just calling something 17 doesn't make it so.

Arienette

So when are we going to see the Kodomo no Jikan math game for the DS?

Proz

I love how japan calls 10 yrd olds 17. I totally believe them, since it helps me sleep at night. Wouldn't be so bad if the duck didn't creep me right the f*** out.

w1ndwaker

@Channing: I can see it now
"Excuse me can you help me? Do you speak English?"

"as a matter of fact I do, what can I help you with?"

"Well you can first explain to me why you suddenly got a massive erection..."

Spiderbait

It was nothing.

No boobs. No cameltoe at all.
[d.hatena.ne.jp]

Mojomagic

@Krackatoa: Because certain people will probably masturbate while playing this game in a public place. I don't know of anybody that masturbates to COD4 although I could be mistaken.

Kenny

The duck is definitely NSFW and I'm going to get fired for it.

So, they get English right, or will this just be prone to more "Engrish"?
Either way, they get to molest [fake girls] on their favorite handheld...

超外人

@pandafresh: Look at it this way. What's more horrific:

This game: You touched a young girl in the boob. Hurrah! Bonus points!

CoD4: You ran up to a man, shot him in the back, violently blowing holes open in vital organs and major arteries in an attempt to end his life.

Sure, it's perverted, but in the age of the internet, why is perverted that much worse than grotesque violence?

Krackatoa

There is no victim in drawings, unlike child porn.

Also, how exactly would Kotaku get into trouble for hosting stuff like this? Type "Lyrical Nanoha" into youtube and you got more risky stuff.

The_Phiphler

This is awesome because it can't be worse than the anime, right?

Right?

God even though I like loli and the like, that anime was bad enough to be feared. Goddamn.

The duck is some guy that came from a different world by magic and turned the girl into a magical girl, and for some reason can't be human on earth or something easily silly.

Ashton

@pandafresh: Well, no, it kind of does.

After all, we're not talking actual kiddie porn here, only simulated. No children were harmed in the making of this game. But the sort of arguments for why a game like this is bad - outside of the relatively obvious and still poignant "that's fucked up" - most of them sound really similar to the arguments that anti-video game advocates make as to why video games are bad.

Slatz_Grobnik

It seems that Japanese games and anime can get away with anything as long as they say the girls are 17... Nevermind that they look 7.
Plus it's OK, she's only your stepsister, you're not related by blood.

And that duck is just obscene. It screams instant bestiality. Look at that lustful gaze... Eeeek!

Antiterra

Nintendo hesitates when it comes to mature rated games but they have no problem putting THIS out????

timekeeper402

Ah shit for double entendre title. Anyone that posted here is all doomed...crap.

goldwings

Me thinks some doth protest too much...

bnpederson

Brian u make me very sad.

StrifeHawkins

does the game teach words like "pedophile" and "lolita"?

or perhaps "jailbait"? maybe not jailbait because clearly she's WAAAY younger than "jailbait"...

icepick314

@Agghyson: what? please dont say child porn is the same thing as COD or Halo, that doesnt and will never make sense.

pandafresh

17? More like 7.

Ecks

Beware perverted ducks!

LuppyLuptonium

Don't be so surprise, Japan is the opposite of the US,

In the U.S. seeing someone naked is bad, seeing someone decapitated and loose all his blood is good,
In Japan seeing someone naked is OK, but seeing someone dismembered is bad.

And saying this is child rape and child porn is the SAME as saying as COD or Halo is a killing simulation. If not what is so different about not killing someone when playing violence and not raping someone when playing a game with naked bodies ?

Agghyson

...the first screen looks like a good idea, but the second is the wrongest wrong wrongness this side of Wrongville.

Japan...

Sabre_Justice: Okay, no more long name.

@Channing: ugh, that's gonna make me sick

k30248

Maybe its Japan's way of getting their child predators to learn english so they can ship them over here and deflower us?

lammy742

loliland!!! :D

Sinharvest

@Channing: I read about it.

THE PAIN IS STILL WORSE THAN I CAN EVER IMAGINE.

Antihippy

That girl is only 17 in the world where years last 183 days. I believe that the UK are proposing a law to make owning stuff like this a jailable offense. WTF is up with the Japanese?

dr_lha

@Channing: Yeah, so I checked it out...very, um, interesting. Oh, and pretty nasty gross. The weird shit people get into eh?

housewarmer

my goodness, i cant believe some sick bastard would actually draw that...a duck in a hat, whats next.

pandafresh

@Poison: PROMOTIONS!!

Grey Gecko

*phew*
That duck with a hat almost got me fired!

Poison

Ha! I can imagine Jacko's reaction if he saw this.

@Channing: "Look up some Loli-guro and..."
This can't end well...

Grey Gecko

@IronsUK:
Good, I will not be accountable for what weird stuff you may see.

I've been to the bottom of otaku lifestyle. It is not a pretty thing. This is very far from being "sick" once you understand the depths of otaku. This isn't much different from Sailor Moon, to be honest. All those anime henshin shows were like this. It really isn't a big deal (in Japan).

Channing

not4chan in my KOTAKU?!

StormdragonBlue

@Channing: I really don't want to.

IronsUK

That girl is 17 years old? How disappointing. I was expecting a bit...more.

Zyzex_Remix

@Antihippy:
No, do not look it up. Seriously.

Channing

@hk458: [secretofmana.planets.gamespy.com]

Need we say more? Beware of ducks with helmets...

Shiryu

Gah! Bad duck! Bad duck!
Thanks Bash, I was tired of having a sex drive anyway.

cynopt

@StrifeHawkins: It's on Famitsu! Like the biggest, most widely read game magazine/website in Japan!

Brian Ashcraft

I was lucky to avoid my mother seeing me looking at loli.

Mustakrakish

@Channing: OH GOD WHY.

WHY MUST YOU PIQUE MY CURIOSITY.

WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYY.

Antihippy

@IronsUK:

But! Shes asking for it! Wearing nothing but skin!

And we love each other!

And she came on to me!

GURO!!!!!

spargo_1

That duck is actually creepier than the loli.

What?

I have seven days to live? Just by looking at the duck.

Shit.

Antihippy

@IronsUK:
Not in Japan it's not. =|
Look up some Loli-guro and get back to me on what you shouldn't be aroused by. =/

Channing

@Channing: Dude, I think it's illigal to be aroused by images like that!

IronsUK

Wonder if SNK cut its hands when it opened that can of worms.

Does Not Equal

Wow. Time to learn me some English.

No, but seriously, won't this just make otaku associate English with being aroused? This sounds like trouble.

Channing

@IronsUK:

Thats not child porn!
Its Moe! Lolicon! Art!

....

Yes its child porn.

spargo_1

This is not cool at all. Not even remotely.

RagingAvatar

To often my warnings of evil sentient ducks has gone unheaded, well there you go, ducks with hats, if thats not a sign of an impending duck invasion I dont know what is.

hk458

WTH, Japan!? WTH!

Shiryu

errr. kotaku this is a bit too maximum risky, i ould quickly and quietly take these images down, for ur own good. Maximum risky lolikon is not cool

StrifeHawkins

WTF, that's child porn!

IronsUK

Moe~

SupaPhly

Brrr...I can already imagine it now,
"No your honor, I didnt try to touch her, I was trying to learn how to say admire and lunatic"...

=/

hk458

what.

Grinman

@taichi425:
First, the show itself sounds funny overall and that's a good way to learn, but...

Characters who look like kids but are actually 16-20 are very very common. *hides avatar* I think the objection comes from actually looking at the character and screenshots and seeing a character who looks 8-10 being blatantly sexualized while... 99% nude. How many loli fans look at a character like Sasami from Tenchi Muyo and think "I'd hit that... but woah, over 700 years old? That's way too old for me!"? Not many judging by the tons of porn people draw of her - plot age is arbitrary.

Loli for cuteness? FTW... Loli for sex? I can't logically say it's morally wrong if drawn but damn it creeps me out. Where I really oppose it is that it paradoxically drags the entire medium out of acceptable culture the more mainstream that part of it gets. Find someone you know who doesn't know you like anime and just bring the subject up - I find overwhelmingly it's gone from "what, like Sailor Moon?" or "tentacles?" to "that stuff is for pedos!" the last few years regardless of all the shows on TV here now, and it irritates me to no end...

@Bokusatsu_Tenshi:
That's Pixel Maritan, not Moetan. You probably know that, but the wording of your three posts leaves it open for interpretation either way. Maritan's Full Metal Jacket quotes are sometimes off, but man it's funny. There's a listening activity CD that goes with it too!

fuchikoma

Best Moetan example EVER:

Dominance - We will wager the DOMINANCE of the world over a fight between robots.

mintycrys

also I mean WTF, the word is moetan....if you knew what it mean then you know why the character is drawn with kiddy looks.

KuroiNaito

I agree with gannon...I mean shit, I had sex at 14, when I was 18 I had sex with a 15 year old....does that mean im a pedo. Its not the age of consent in my state, but who cares when you're horny teens.

Last time I checked pedophile was defined towards children not teens. But then people will say anybody under 18 is a kid, the kids will say FUCK YOU!.
American christians are too self righteous. The world is not a fairy tale.

KuroiNaito

Well I'm glad everyone is handling this in a mature and responsible manner.

Polite_Society

@Gannon: Well that is if you can stand the 15 year old girl...

But how the hell do I nominate comment of the week? This is totally it.

Not-Witzbold

I wonder how many people will cry Hot Tears of Shame when they realize that Dizzy from Guilty Gear is 3 years old.

Ashton

a prime example of one of the phrases the little girl teaches you in english without breaking a sweat.

+ Watch video

chunkymunky

@StrifeHawkins:
Not to mention the duck in a hat? Who is giving headwear out to these waterfowl?

majornws

@Antiterra: The duck was human, actually.

pekcun

You know, I never get how people think Lolicon is Child Porn.

The Otaku loli rule is: 2d Delicious, 3d Pig Disgusting

I've been in Art Galleries where there are photos of 12 year olds being defended as art while these things, which actually IS art since it's DRAWN, being persecuted as PORN PORN PORN.

pekcun

@icepick314: The girl is 18.

pekcun

@Agghyson: If we say lolicon is Child Porn, we might as well burn everyone that reads Harry Potter because they're witches!

pekcun

@Sabre_Justice: Okay, no more long name.: I KNOW! A duck with a hat?! WTF Japan? WTF

pekcun

@dr_lha: Japanese? Don't you mean British?

pekcun

Actually, according to the story, the girls are 18 years old.

pekcun

Heh, oh Amerika. Seriously, if you find this shocking, I recommend you keep Japan off your travel list.

Yuki

All your arguments are invalid anydangways, as this is just a cartoon and there is no actual teenage girl being "touched" here and, for the record, no underage girls were harmed/groped/raped/poked/spooned with/given "candy"/solicited/kidnapped/sold into foreign slavery/raked at any point in the production cycle of this game.

So srsly guyz, put the torches and pitchforks down before Jack Thompson catches wind of this.

PS: Yes, I did just compare the loli-haters to a pre-Civil War lynch mob. X3

The Great Moof

@Bokusatsu_Tenshi: OMFG that is the funniest thing I've seen in a long, long time. Nice find!

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