To: Totilo
From: Bashcraft
RE: Missing Handheld Gaming's Golden Age

Ah yes.

Haven't been playing portables much of late as I'm at home all the time, so if I can squeeze in a game, it'll be GTAIV, CoD4 or MGS4 (yes, I started it, and yes, it's quite good!) Hrm, Mrs. Bashcraft plays Mario Kart DS like every damn day, so.................. She still seems to be in the thick of it. (If the thick of it is the year 2005.)

It's your last day at Kotaku Tower! We had a delightful time and appreciate you filling in while Crecente rides around in a boat. I'm sure next week will seem way more relaxing as you helm one site and not two. Also, while I can't speak for everyone, I forgive you for Hogan Knows Best. Maybe.

Thank Luke for the Photoshop. It's brilliant.

What you missed last night
New Adventure Island Coming, Maybe Star Soldier As Well
Blizzard Splashwatch Day Five - Death Knights, Protoss, And Purple Penguins
Arise, Sirs Dan And Sam Houser?
Soul Calibur IV Features Hot Tag-Team Action
Ubisoft + Prince Of Persia + DS Is What You'd Expect
Big Exclusive White Knight Chronicles Coming Financial Year 2008
Did A Boy Really Kill Himself After His Wii Was Taken Away?
MGS 4 Moved Eight Times More PS3s In Release Week
Wii Castlevania Revealed! It's A Fighting Game?

Unconfirmed, but word has it that LucasArts just axed the team responsible for Star Wars: The Force Unleashed. If this true, this rumour is reminiscent of rumblings we heard earlier this month that once The Force Unleashed ships, LucasArts will pinkslip 100 employees and cease internal development. All of this comes as LucasArts recently saw massive layouts. These latest, rumoured layoffs were long-time staffers who had worked on big titles like X-Wing, Full Throttle and Grim Fandango. If The Force Unleashed proves successful, LucasArts might find itself at a disadvantage if it plans on doing the game internally.

Eds Note: We were contacted by a LucasArts staffer who was part of the Force Unleashed team, stating these layoffs mentioned in the original Joystiq post were not recent and that there have been no additional layoffs since what we reported earlier this month.

LucasArts Cuts Hit [Joystiq via CVG]

We're not really surprised that Brain Age got a dirty movie, we're just surprised it's taken so long! Originally released in Japan as Touhoku Daigaku Mirai Kagakugijutsu Kyoudoukenkyuu Centre Kawashima Ryuuta Kyouju Kanshuu Nou o Kitaeru Otona no DS Training, the DS game was a smash hit back in 2005 and 2006. This August, naughty video company Moodyz is releasing adult video parody Chinpo o Kitaeru Otona no Ingenware Training (or "Dick Drilling Adult's Lewd Word Self Training"). The DVD stars Moodyz actres Hikaru Wakana (her blog, maybe NSFW), and the box features a label that says this DVD is for "One Player" and that "Ultimated Continues Are Possible".

For those, who haven't seen the Japanese box art for the original Brain Age and its sequel, click here and here.

NDS「脳トレ」のパロディAVが登場！ [Hatimaki]

Valve talk the talk and certainly walk the walk. It's the great deal, so when Valve exec Gabe Newell says that PC gaming isn't dead (it's not!) and that PCs have a significant platform advantage (they do!), you know the dude means it. Here Newell puts everything in perspective with a nod to developer Blizzard:

Essentially, [Blizzard is] creating a new Iron Man every month, in terms of the gross revenue they're generating as a studio. Any movie studio would be shouting about that from the rooftops... We think the number of connected PC gamers we are selling our products to dwarf the current generation of consoles put together... There are tremendous opportunities in figuring out how to reach out to those customers.

Via game site Eurogamer, which a nice meaty article up on PC gaming and Valve that's full of tasty tidbits of data and choice quotes. Read it.

Valve: Why the PC is the future [Eurogamer] [Pic]

The third game in the Siren series - Blood Curse - will be coming in two flavours. In Japan, you'll be able to get it on Blu-Ray. But in the US? It's being released as episodic, downloadable content, presumably in order to test the waters, see if there's really a market for the game in the US. Fine for Sony, but what if you're less a single-issue buyer, more a trade paperback kinda guy? Here's what you do: import the Asian edition of the game, which also comes on a Blu-Ray disc. Like most Asian edition's, it contains an English-language option, so you'll have it all on one disc and be able to understand the thing. Win win!

A way to experience Siren: Blood Curse on Blu-ray [Siliconera]

Wii Fit is wildly popular. Some folks are even buying it in hopes of dropping a few pounds — which is fine. If used as intended, Wii Fit is a suitable enough for exercise support (though, it might give best results if combined with traditional exercise). But like everything, there must be sneaky ways to cheat. There are! According to C|Net's Crave, here are a couple ways you can fool Wii Fit into thinking you are fitter:

Make your Mii taller
Enter heavy clothing
Waggle your way through jogging
Ski from the sofa
Use the Balance Board as a standard controller for heading

Good times! Crave does point out that even cheating at Wii Fit is a workout of sorts.

How to cheat at Wii Fit [Crave]

Hey, it's Hudson icon, Takahashi Meijin! Otherwise known as Master Higgins. Dude's in the US at the moment on a promo tour for Hudsons's Adidas commercial Deca Sports, and yesterday sat in on a big roundtable interview. Most of the stuff discussed you can live without, but for these: Meijin confirms that a new Adventure Island game is in development, to be released via WiiWare. He then almost confirms, with a little help from Hudson USA's Mike Pepe, the fact they're also working on a new Star Soldier game, again for the Wii. Wonderful!

Interview with Master Higgins [Zentendo]

In Japan, it's pretty common for video games to have pachinko machines. Heck! Movies, anime and manga character even get pachinko machines based on them. It's not just spinning metal balls! New pachinko machines even feature large LCD-type displays to keep players engaged. Pachinko maker Yamasa's Resident Evil machine puts poor Jill Valentine through the standard series of scares and shootings -- if only for suggestive glances!

Yeah, it was a joke. The new Prince of Persia DS game is not called Imagine: Prinze of Perzia. But it so could have been. Why? Because Ubisoft love putting the letter "Z" at the end of their game titles. Petz, Babyz, Catz, Dogz, they love it. Even if you don't. So why do they persist with it? Is it some cunning marketing ploy? Some means of tapping into our consumerist subconscious? Sadly, no. Speaking with Gamasutra about the latest Dogz title, Ubisoft's Benoit Galarneau said "This title was [originally] developed in 1995 when PF Magic released the first of the series, and we kept it. And since it's always there and nobody else is doing it, maybe it's coming back into fashion". Maybe! Though maybe nobody else is doing it is because 1995 was a long time ago.

Ubisoft's Galarneau On The Rise Of The Petz [Gamasutra]

This Friday (today!), SEGA is location testing new street racing game from its famed AM2 division. Dubbed R-Tuned: Ulimate Street Racing, the arcade game runs on SEGA's Lindbergh arcade system board and supports up to four players. Apparently there is also a home version in development, but that's unconfirmed. The location test kicked off today at 10:00AM Japan Time at the Shinjuku Club SEGA and will wrap up next Monday. Stop by, check it out. Tell 'em Kotaku sent cha!

R-Tuned [Official Site via Game Watch]

Let's find out! Das Gamer was in attendance at Madden 09's launch party the other night, and seems about the only interesting thing that went down was a mass confession from some of the game's previous cover stars, spilling on their more eccentric Madden betting habits. Daunte Culpepper, Madden 2002's cover star while with the Vikings, "won and lost a few mortgage payments on a game of Madden". Exorbitant, yeah, but some of the other guys were a little more creative. Marshall Faulk (Madden 03) had to let somebody else drive his Bentley for a month. And Ray Lewis (Madden 05) used to play Madden for on-demand push-ups, which he'd then hold in reserve, and cash in while he and his teammates were out at restaurants, etc. Ah, must be tough, these lifestyles of the athletic and mega-rich, eh?

Madden Cover Stars Reveal Their Madden Betting Habits, Deny Curse At EA Event [Das Gamers]

We. Are. Confused. 2008 was supposed to be the last year the Games Convention was held in Leipzig. Starting next year, we were meant to get a bigger, badder European show in the more travel-friendly city of Cologne. We were happy with this news, we'd accepted it, were reading up on Cologne seeing who does the best fry-up breakfast. But now the organisers of Leipzig have announced that they'll be staying on, and will be holding another Games Convention in 2009. Which, if we're not mistaken, will give us two tradeshows in Germany next year. And we all know that, in the interests of good business, there can (and shold) be only one.

Leipzig Games Convention Not Moving [Next-Gen]

Eidos' Shellshock 2: Blood Trails has become another casualty in the fight for an R18+ rating for games in Australia. On June 20, it was handed a Refused Classification by the OFLC, banning its sale in the country.

For the Shellshock series, it is a case of history repeating. Back in 2004, Shellshock: Nam '67 was also given an RC, however, it was later resubmitted and managed an MA 15+.

Today I contacted Atari, which publishes Eidos games in Australia, to find out if it plans to take a similar course with Shellshock 2. The answer was no, which means like Digital Extremes' Dark Sector, it's doubtful we'll see it in stores ever.

I'm following up with Atari to find out exactly what the OFLC drew issue with.

Shellshock 2: Blood Trails [OFLC, via PALGN]

Once again Blizzard completely screws with my sleep schedule! After a day of cursing under my breath at all of the people sending in photoshatted pictures of the damned Diablo II box art superimposed over yesterday's splash, the latest splash image gives me the satisfaction of knowing all of it was in vain. This, my friends, is not the Diablo II box art. Between the eyes and the small bit between them, it is one of two things. A Protoss from Starcraft, or the Death Knight from Wrath of the Lich King.

Hit the jump for comparison pictures and decide for yourself, and get a look at the full secret pic revealed!

Oh Sega. Spotted in some run-down Boston arcade by a UK:R reader, this is Sega's Wack-A-Doodle-Do. In which "animated roosters & hens raise their heads, gobble, squawk and cluck as the player races to wack each egg yolk to finish a sequence". Note: these are not regular roosters & hens. They are gangster, robot chickens. So, yeah. Bad chickens. So don't feel bad about crushing their eggs/unborn young. The machine's flyer is after the jump if your hunger for ridiculous Sega arcade machines isn't quite satisfied.

Spotted in Akihabara retailer Toranoana and burned into your brain forever! That PSP is covered with stickers and running a demo for PC ero-game Dokodemo suki shite itsudemo suki shite ("Love me wherever, Love me whenever"). Keep in mind that this game is for the PC and not the PSP, and the shop created this sticker covered PlayStation Portable to promote this computer game. It's working!

Full display after the jump.

As savvy a piss-take on modern America as the Grand Theft Auto series has become, it's always worth remembering that it's not an American series. It's a British one. Rockstar are a British company (as were DMA), their founders, British. And with the GTA series nestled securely atop the gaming world in terms of both critical acclaim and popularity, Develop are wondering...when can we expect the series to start getting some serious recognition? Sure, they may have their tongue resting gently inside their cheeks when pondering how long til we see "the inevitable coming of Sir Sam Houser, or Dan Houser OBE", but the point itself is still valid! France are down with bestowing major recognition upon noted game developers, you can't help but wonder when places like Britain (and the US) will start doing likewise.

Knights of the Sandbox City [Develop]

Okay folks, just click here for me. Now, tell me - is that a forum template for Diablo III? It sure looks like it!

For the past few days Diablo III has been hinted at, but not revealed. This is pretty much confirmation that the company plans to announce the game very soon.

Hit the jump for a full resolution shot of the above image.

[Thanks sid!]

Update: Watch me getting all excited. Seems it goes all the way up to Diablo V as well, so it's probably just a placeholder.

Apparently erotic computer game White Album will find a new home on the PLAYSTATION 3. The risky romance simulation title from ero-game developer Leaf was originally released in 1998, so this PS3 version sounds like a complete overhaul. The game follows a young college student that's involved with a rising pop star. Game mechanic: The focus is on a current relationship and not making a new girlfriend. Don't expect the PS3 incarnation to be as saucy as the PC version. Oh! A new anime adaptation is planned as well. Still waiting on official confirmation, though.

WHITE ALBUM」アニメ化＆PS3移植決定！？ [Moon Phase via AnimeNewsNetwork]

That crazy guy Anthony from EcoGamer has once again come up with the goods. This time round it's the lowest prices for Nintendo's Super Smash Bros. Brawl. If you haven't picked it up yet, and aren't afraid of the problems that might crop up, hit the jump for a list of retailers and how much they're selling the game for.

The latest issue of Famitsu has more news on Soul Calibur IV. Nothing on Star Wars or disappearing clothes here, though, this stuff's technical: the game will feature tag-team action. Yup, in the good old-fashioned Marvel v Capcom style. Well, almost. It's supposedly not quite as extensive - it's suggested that team-mates are used only for stuff like combos, not full-blooded, mid-battle tap-outs. There's also only mention of it being available in singleplayer, but still. A Vader-Kratos one-two punch? What a weird and wonderful world we live in.

Soul Calibur IV Features 'Character Swapping' [1UP]

Never mind that the analysts peg the Xbox 360 as Europe's "biggest loser", sales in the continent did double after the price cut. Microsoft is in for the long haul. Just listen to Xbox Europe's David Gosen (pictured) go on and on:

Ubisoft today took the wraps off their upcoming Prince of Persia title for the DS, The Fallen King. Yes, Ubisoft. For the DS. So that pic's a joke, right? Oh, haha, Ubisoft are making a Prince of Persia game for the DS, they'll probably make the Prince a cute kid, call it Imagine: Prinze of Perzia or something. But no! No joke. Pic's real. The Fallen King's a real game - a platformer - and it's due around Christmas.

Variety's Ben Fritz has popped out and gotten a few more scraps of info regarding the PS3's video download service due in the Summer. Seems that while Sony are currently in negotiations with all major studios to offer their content on the service, none are yet to officially sign up. Meaning that, as things stand, only one studio is officially on-bard: Sony Pictures. Obviously, this doesn't mean things will stay that way - you can bet that, just like the XBL Video Marketplace, most (if not all) major studios will be selling their movies on the service sooner or later. What it does mean is that either the service is going to launch soon (during or just after E3) with only Sony's movies available, or the "Summer 2008" timeframe actually means "late August" as Sony wait for more product to be on offer before launching.

Playstation 3 download service may also include PSP, doesn't have other studios yet [Variety]

In Sony's corporate strategy meeting, it was also announced that early anticipated RPG White Knight Chronicles (Shirokishi Monogatari) will be released in the 2008 financial year. The game is being developed by Level-5, the studio behind the Professor Layton games. The third-person game was playable at last year's Tokyo Game Show. It's expected to do brisk business in Japan.

Sony Corporate Strategy [Sony]

A source at EB Games has informed us of a possible price drop for Sony's Playstation 2 - one we could see in just a few weeks. Although the source was unable to provide an exact figure, $99 was highlighted as a strong possibility. Apparently EB has quite the cache of PS2s ready to go for this.

The source didn't specific whether the drop was for the slim, standard model or both. I'm sure you'll agree that if it's for the former, this would be great news.

As usual, Sony Australia had no comment regarding the rumour, so it's fingers crossed at this stage.

It's been almost nine years since I first played the Dreamcast port of Soul Calibur which, at the time, seemed like the pinnacle of fighting game visuals. Another instance of my gaming career where I genuinely thought "This is it. They've done it. It can't possibly get any better". This was, of course, before the engineers at Namco Bandai dedicated man hours and processing power to ass-jiggle physics; before we really knew how detailed a cod piece could be. Anyway, the compressed Soul Calibur for Xbox 360 seems like a fun diversion, but I've still got my Dreamcast hooked up to Input 3 on my television. And Soulcalibur IV is out, like, any day now. Kinda makes the whole thing seem moot.

Soul Calibur Gameplay HD [GameTrailers]

Do you own Super Smash Bros. Brawl? Has it given you a little trouble?

We've had emails come in from more than a few disgruntled readers, reporting the problems they've encountered with SSBB. The issues appear identical to those that popped up during the game's international debut.

If your copy of SSBB is acting up, drop us a comment describing your situation. Hopefully we can get some attention from Nintendo Australia, and perhaps coax a response from the media-shy organisation.