@mode7even: Took the words out of my mouth...or away from my typing fingers, rather.

WHOOOOOOOSH.

Did you all hear that? That was Bruce Willis' career going down the shitter. Wave goodbye, kids!

Tyber_Zann

oh man, they should get brad pitt to play the crazy guy!

then it'd be like "TWELVE MONKEYS: TWO"!

108

In other news...

Gene Shalit was recently 'let go' from The Today Show. Officially - NBC said termination was in response to out-of-control facial hair; but many suspect that his less-than-glowing review of the movie Kane And Lynch is to blame...

The Shalit Scandal will come. Mark my words

kosbee

@JimElNino: I'm inclined to agree. Games and films have pretty different priorities in general, so there's not really much to stop a bad game (with good characters and story) from making a decent movie.

So long as Uwe Boll isn't directing, anyway.

Toasticus

Aint Willis a tad old to be playing a thirty-something Kane? Unless the film takes place several years after the events of the game.

beem

Soooo...does this mean when it comes time for critics to review the film, they'll get fired for not liking it as well?

mode7even

With that casting, this could surprisingly turn into a good adaptation - especially since the story was supposed to be one of the only real strong points... if the screenplay is any good.

sir_carrot

@LittleBigPlaneteer: Truth.

Captain Impulse

My first reaction to this headline was laughter. Followed by tears. Then, tears of laughter. Now I'm just hungry.

ShaggE

The good thing about this should be that there aren't any hardcore fans of this game to get angry when the story is completely different from that of the game.

Spartan1308

Ewww... Oh well, near as I could tell from the reviews, the only good element of the game was the plot/characters. On a side note, it looks like nobody has any followers anymore. :(

ChunkOFunk

Bandits 2... I'd watch it.

Moosebox

Future Fact: Rotten Tomatoes will be paid to give the movie better ratings. When a reviewer gives a terrible rating, that person will be fired.

LittleBigPlaneteer

cool the best part for me about kane and lynch was the chrs/story. Looking forward to it. Also cool to see its still in to bash Kane and Lynch. I still wonder how many of the people who talk shit about the game actually spent time playing it.

Detre

Directed by Guy Ritchie? The shoe fits.

Captain Impulse

...So they're making a serious version of "Bandits" then? Shame that they're not getting Michael Mann in any capacity, considering his movies were supposed to be the "inspiration" for a lot of the set pieces, of I remember right...

verrius

"The flick will be produced by the guys that brought Hitman to the silver screen."

in other words:

The flick is doomed.

drunkentyger

It actually sounds like it would make a better movie than game. The story seemed somewhat interesting, it's the gameplay that sucked.

A lot of people criticized the game because it was hard to play as such unlikable characters. It's much easier to watch a movie featuring such characters (Reservoir Dogs, Natural Born Killers, etc.)

JimElNino

Executive A: You know what hasn't been ripped off in a while? Reservoir Dogs!

Executive B: Actually, there IS a shitty video game we could tie it into...

Executive A: I love that we can work while we do cocaine!

(apologies to 30 Rock)

cynopt

Do they have to pay for high review scores again this time?

elevenoverzero

@Monger King: To be fair, the story wasn't too bad and it's debatable - like all things.

goldwings

They're making a Kane & Lynch movie?

...why?

Monger King

Ebert and Roeper getting pay-offs to give better reviews of the movie?

DanteODiabo

I think we need a thousand Bruce Willis' to stop the movie from sucking friend. :(

DigitalHero

Who's idea was it to bring such a poor game to the silver screen? God, I'm glad it was only a rental for me.

ChemicalWedding

Holy carp this might not suck, if Bruno is willing to do it.

Chewbenator

If they cast Jeff Gerstmann as Lynch, I'll see it on opening night...twice.

Arklop

He has the look

Struct09

why don't they just say they're remaking HEAT and leave it at that?

Anyone else notice how the heist 'segment' of GTA4 was way better than the entire 'game' of Kane and Lynch?

decodergrizzly

The best (or only good?) things about Kane and Lynch were the characters and story. So it as a movie makes sense.

ShirtGuyDom

Well if Good movies make Crappy games Like Iron man did then maybe a Crappy game will make a good movie.... lol

Stikasasn

@kosbee: I thought there was already a Shalit Scandal. Didn't it involve a Circus Peanut, 3 rolls of duct tape, and a rubber fat suit with the words "Smother me in Hoisin Sauce" etched in the back?

ShaggE

That bruce willis avatar is lollerific. Hopefully Kane&Lynch will be a better movie than a game.

PATSCRU

As a game, Kane & Lynch was really flawed. The story was aimless-- it had some real high notes, but it had no idea how to avoid dragging its ass in between them. They really didn't explore much of the relationship between the main characters, except to throw out that Lynch killed his wife and is batshit insane. The endings (both of them) felt like being punched in the face for bothering to play through the whole game-- how in the fuck are they going to make a movie that ends like that? What kind of fucking idiot would watch it?

That said, some of the gameplay-- when they weren't trying to make something out of nothing and extend the game beyond where it should have ended-- was great. Killing Retomoto, the end of the first stage where you're holed up in the donut shop, the car chase after you hold up the bank-- that stuff was fucking aces.

But a movie? Pass, thanks.

wild homes

Since when did we start making movies out of games no one liked?

GregoriusH

If a decent producer took parts of the Kane and Lynch storyline and revised it, they could end up with a really awesome movie. But with the Hitman team working it, I won't even waste time watching the preview for this one.

unmarkedone

w00t!!!!!hudson hawk in kane & lynich. not going to miss this, hell i wont even see it...maybe uwe will direct it and the big screen rendition of asteroids.

inkycap

Kane and Lynch wasn't bad. I mean for 30 bucks used can you really go wrong? Co-op online play with a free map pack. Gameplay was just repetative not neccessarily bad. The characters were great so it'd make a good movie adaptation

NessD12

Well, if they are going to actually make this game a movie, they couldn't pick much better than Bruce Willis and Billy Bob Thornton. Bandits was a blast, and if Kane and Lynch is over-the-top with tongue-in-cheek it might actually be a fun film.

bornonce

@Monger King: Because they make movies out of every game...

Billy and Bruce? Dint they start together in some other cool movie?

almattitude_v1

@Monger King: Decent premise and plot bogged down with a mediocre playing game. sad really. I always said it'd work better as a movie.

Beezle212

@DanteODiabo:
@elevenoverzero:
@LittleBigPlaneteer:
@mode7even:
@kosbee:

Sorry I'm late, is it too late to make a joke about someone getting fired for giving it a bad review? Oh...I see that's been covered, nothing to see here then; move along.

yodablues

@GregoriusH: The day Uwe Boll first sat his ass into a director's chair?

Captain Impulse

That avatar will haunt my dreams tonight...

kingofrain

Didn't they base Kane and Lynch on Heat? Who needs a K&L movie then?

NighTrekr

Bruce? Well i'll be damned, ladies and gentlemen, the first movie adaptation of a game that is better then the game!

ryivanV2

No!!! one of my favorite actors is doing a game movie, and why did they get the hitman director. Well this one might just challenge waterworld.

McClain

What the HELL is that? A Bruce Willis sex doll prototype?

marmidukestank

Give Jeff Gerstmann a cameo. He can be playing the game with a disgusted expression in the background or something.

pico77

I'd rather like to see Vinnie Jones in the movie than Bruce Willis.

Spiderbait

underneath all the crap of kayne and lynch there were a few really great moments. i wonder if this might have made a better movie than game from the get go.

SAGA

wow. that game was horrid. so i guess now there will be a horrible movie to accompany it. fuck kane & lynch.

SoulPunch

He looks like that tall guy that played the brother from "everybody Loves Raymond" in that picture...

VakeroRokero

Yay, shit game to shit film.

iseptimus

Hope the movies better than the game...

Because the game was terrible.

string_theory

@JimElNino:
I think so too. The overall game mechanics were wonky but the story was bearable. At the very least, they didn't make it too cliched.

I think it might have a good chance to be a good film. Bruce Willis is there. If this comes out guns-a-blazing mindless action like Die Hard or whatever, I think it'd have met its mark. Plus the game didn't sell that well so most people wouldn't know the plot anyhow.

Sidenote: That fake Bruce Willis is a bit creepy! Is it a sex-doll? Bruce After undergoing fire skin-extensive surgery? I have no idea...

excaliburps

You really can't make assumptions that a movie adaption of a game will be crap because the game version had sucky gameplay etc.

K&L had a decent story to it, better than alot of games. It was probably the only good thing going for it. The story was crap towards the end but overall it was a good story.

Movies are based around stories so I don't see why it wont be decent, especially with Bruce Willis taking part.

Eon.

To be honest i thought the Hitman movie wasnt to bad, the story was all over the place but the action and getting the "look" of the game it did a pretty damn good job...

Trencher

I can see what should happen.

The movie will be pretty naff, but Lionsgate will be putting a lot of advertising everywhere for it. The review in Empire will end up criticising parts of it and giving it a lower-than-average score. Only problem is that Lionsgate will be putting excessive ads into the same issue.

Lionsgate will complain to Empire's paymasters, and the reviewer will get fired. Both Empire & Lionsgate will deny that the dismissal was due to the review, but the online community will see the timing as suspicious. Empire's subscription numbers drop faster than the prospects of the Virtual Boy, and Lionsgate's reputation goes down after allegations of manipulating reviews in the background.

If this doesn't happen, then it's not really an accurate adaptation of the game. ;)

Jonax

Why would he risk his acting career, what's left of it to Ubisoft Kane and Lynch? That is a bad move, as bad as Hudson Hawk movie probably.

karateka

I think as a movie this could end up good. Might even realize the concept of the game better than the game ever hoped. Thornton and Willis are perfect for it.

I didn't like the game. Even coop couldn't save it for me. I remember telling a friend that it felt like a really bad Eidos game. And he pointed out that the game was in fact from Eidos.

Shinryoma

@chaos242: You're not getting me, I think he makes great movies. I like his movies, watched all the DieHards, I'm saying why would he risk that on a game to movie with ubisoft. Lets face it, ubisoft hasn't got a great record for games...or movie. And as I remember personally, I watched Hudson Hawk also, in my book it failed. They are all from personal experience..I didn't make it up.

karateka

Somehow I can kinda imagined it

nekoRamen

Hey, One for the original PS had Bruce Willis in it and that was a pretty cool game.

Strangelove

@karateka: I'm wildly guessing that you haven't seen any of his movies in recent years. Planet Terror, and Sin City were both movies where he played KICKASS characters and played them very well. Funny you allude to a movie that's 17 years old to make a point about someone's failing movie career.

chaos242

well im glad to see im one of the few who really enjoyed this game. oh well, i thought the actual gameplay was pretty damn solid, although i never did mess around with the multiplayer. theres def. a better actor out there for kane rather than brucie, i think going with a lesser known actor would be better.

pandafresh

I haven't played Kane & Lynch, but from the previews I saw and read about it, it kind of looked like it should have been a movie *instead of* a videogame. The characters seemed interesting, the story seemed to have potential, etc.

So what if the game supposedly sucks? In fact, I wonder if better the gameplay makes it more difficult it is to adapt the characters to a screenplay, because the focus is less on storytelling, and more on what's fun. Mario Bros., anybody?

BtownDesignGuy

Awesome.
The game might've sucked but it was a bigger dissapointment to me because I thought the characters and story were unique so I really wanted to hear more about them, gameplay was horrible though.

I really hope the movie does good.

tehFluffz

Why am I getting flashes of Hudson Hawk? A game and movie I've never seen?

Angryrider

How can only 3 people have mentioned Bandits thus far? Like.. For real..

TheRunningboard7

WTF is that picutre...the Bruce Willis Real Doll??!!

macorange

@karateka:

Ubisoft games: No More Heroes, Naruto: Rise of a Ninja, Rainbow Six Vegas II, Assassin's Creed, Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter I and II, Splinter Cell Pandora Tomorrow, BEYOND GOOD AND FUCKING EVIL!

Ubisoft movies: None?

So, you're saying those aren't great games? And the movies that they haven't made aren't good as well? That's like saying the chocolate soufflé I tried to make tomorrow didn't taste good...?

chaos242

Tomb Raider is probably one of the more successfuly game to movie I know of and it wasn't even good. The only reason it did well was Angelina Jolie, Given the Success rate of game to movie in general...who would want to do it. I'm just saying that it'll probably suck and bruce might as well scratch that one out of his resume like hundson hawk. I don't think Kane and Lyncy is even known much out of the gaming comunity to attract the general public to watch this movie. I doubt that this will be that successful.

karateka

In my mind, I pictured Billy Bob as Kane and Bruce Willis as Lynch. Just seems like a better match to me.

pkpbeast

@pkpbeast: I agree. Bruce Willis is actually a lot more versatile than most people give him credit for. It's true that in most action movies he plays almost exactly the same character, but when you take into account movies like "Death Becomes Her" and some of his other more obscure films, he's definitely capable of a wider range. It's just that he's rarely given the chance. He's usually typecast to play the same type of character over and over.

In any case, that's my two cents.

Grue

this is ridiculous. this is even more confusing to me than making a resident evil movie. why make a movie of a game that makes every effort to mimic films that have come before it, films that are more than likely to remain far superior to the film adaptation of said game?

thaKingRocka

Bandits all over again

RichardNixon

This....might..not....suck!

FLYBOY611

i think he`d be cool but billy bob euch that guy has no talent what so ever in my opinion. I wish they actually spent the time to do things properly.

slyzxx786

I haven´t played a lot of Kane and Lynch, but the little time i spent with it, it always seemed to me like a very good movie material, like the dialogues and the music, and with Bruce Willis as the perfect cast choice, this movie will maybe be really good; If only people would forget all that shit about Gerstmann and Gamespot...

Daisuash

Remember, if you don't like this film, the studio will see to it that you get fired from your job! If you don't see it, they will sue you and everyone else in the country! The American people have screwed over the movie industry for the last time!

+ Watch video

gaijira

KILL THAT THING ON THE PIC WITH FIRE!!!

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

I actually think that Kane and Lynch could be a pretty good movie, and I'd rather like to see the characters on bigscreen. Just keep them off my console. ;)

coyo7e

@yodablues: You win this post.

everybest

Lame. They should make a Mass Effect movie starring Bruce Willis as Shepard instead, if only because it's extremely simple to make an EXACT likeness of Bruce Willis when creating your character.

Koztah

If the movie doesn't do well and is critically panned, will the movie critics be fired?

Seriously, if Willis is gonna do it.... the man can't do that much wrong. It's not like a movie can have control issues...

blackadvent

@blackadvent:

Willis hasn't been picking them well for a while now. With the exception of Unbreakable, Sin City, and Planet Terror, his films this decade have sucked pretty hard.

Yes, DH 4, wasn't even that good, even if you don't compare it to the best of the series.

If they don't massively rewrite the script from the game, the K and L movie could be an unintentional laugh-riot.

VicViper

My main concern with Bruce in Kane and Lynch is that he might try and make Kane likeable.

What I thought was great about Kane was that he really didn't care what anyone thought of him, and he was a fairly horrible person.

I kinda liked the game 'cept after it jumped the shark to Havana.

johnnyfear

jeff bridges should be lynch

ushi

nice. I hope Eidos comes out with a Age of Conan movie too. Staring you know who. Oh i guess he would have to get out of politics first.

extratightpants

Hmmmm most video game based movies do suck, but i'm not going to judge this 1 yet, i'll wait until a trailer or something.

D-Sovereignty

The story was cookie cutter.
Your common Reservoir Dogs spinoff.

AssassinTRIP