August 17, 2008

humour

Atari Games Too Bad to be True

Posted by Owen Good at 11:00 AM on August 17, 2008

Watercooler Games saw this earlier in the week and gave a detailed deconstruction of how a Free the Falklands! concept would be graphically impossible on the Atari 2600. I took one look and knew it was satire because one of the writers for this site, Jason Torchinsky, is a comedian and a name I remember as the editorial cartoonist of The Daily Tar Heel back when I was at N.C. State's Technician in the early 1990s.

But play along, because it's funny. Why look, his site, the Van Gogh-Goghs, have unearthed from some New Mexico landfill documented evidence of 11 scrapped projects for the Atari 2600! The casualties included such licensing/adaptations as Bosom Buddies (a cross between Kaboom! and Donkey Kong, and Kramer vs. Kramer (like Pong with children). My favourite, because I like poop jokes, is Gunther Gebel-Williams' Cage Cleaner. The bogus rationale for the bogus game sounds like pure pre-video-game-crash self-b.s.ing: "You can't blow up asteroids in real life, but you sure as [expletive deleted] can clean up [expletive deleted]".

The Best Atari 2600 Games You Never Heard Of [The Van Gogh-Goghs, via Water Cooler Games]

role-playing

How Weight Watchers is Like an RPG

Posted by Owen Good at 10:00 AM on August 17, 2008

I need to lose weight, and the Weight Watchers points concept actually resonates with me, as I attempt to do something similar with my home meals, I just don't count the calories like I should. But damn, it is hyperbranded as a female diet plan, and I'm self-conscious enough printing out a Men's Health diet at the office. Still, Wired's Clive Thompson has a different take on why WW works -- it's actually an RPG.

The Weight Watchers program is designed precisely like a role-playing dungeon crawler. That's why people love it, stick to it and have success with it. And it points to the way that we could use game design to make life's drudgery more bearable. [...] Weight Watchers' points function precisely like hit points; each bite of food does damage until you've used up your daily amount, so you sleep and start all over again. Play well and you level up — by losing weight! And the more you play it, the more you discover interesting combinations of the rules that aren't apparent at first. Hey, if I eat a fruit-granola breakfast and an egg-and-romaine lunch, I'll have enough points to survive a greasy hamburger dinner for a treat!

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playstation 3

Ratchet & Clank: To be Continued in 2009

Posted by Owen Good at 9:00 AM on August 17, 2008

1Up's played Ratchet & Clank Future: Quest for Booty (drops next week on the PlayStation Network) all the way to the end, and got the above teaser screen. Insomniac has said nothing, but it's doubtful they'd tease anything other than a full retail release this far out. 1Up notes that it looks like Insomniac will be switching between Resistance and Ratchet titles every other year which is definitely pulling its weight for the PS3.

Ratchet & Clank Continue the Quest in Fall 2009 [1Up]

pc

Indie Dev Asks 'Why?' and Pirates Reply

Posted by Owen Good at 8:00 AM on August 17, 2008

Independent developer Cliff Harris, of Positech Games, asked pirates why they choose to pirate his games, promising them immunity and anonymity in exchange for their honest rationales, which he would aggregate and post on his blog. They reciprocated, and of about six reasons, a righteous indignation at DRM seemed to lead the list. Harris is actually responding to the gripes in both the pricing and de-DRMing of titles in the future, with his own reasoning why it's a good idea.

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fashion

Button Mashing Has Its Virtues

Posted by Owen Good at 7:00 AM on August 17, 2008

Tried and true foreplay methods. One: write the alphabet. Two: Konami code. Find out where they put the start button on the jump.

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game design

The 'Narrative' Straw Man: We're Not Doing That Badly

Posted by Maggie Greene at 6:30 AM on August 17, 2008

Michael Abbott of the Brainy Gamer has a great piece up on the straw man of the 'quality of narrative' debate that's been going on in the industry for quite some time now: things aren't as bad as the collective we make them out to be. Really, they're not. Sure, there are broken promises along the way, disappointments here and there, and certainly the future to look towards — but there are plenty of games who are doing pretty damn well, considering that most can agree that narrative design for games is in its relative infancy:

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industry news

The Godfather II: Trailer

Posted by Owen Good at 6:00 AM on August 17, 2008


Even though it got very repetitive and ultimately fell short of my expectations, and others', I still played The Godfather: The Game to 100 percent completion. After seeing this and reading A.J.'s impressions, I'm willing to give EA another shot with The Godfather II, seen here in the debut trailer that released earlier today. The intimidation animations and gunfire executions look like reprises from the first title, but you get a look at the "Don's View" map, which takes the game's flow away from a roam-the-streets looking-for-trouble model and into a more subtle, decision-making context. Plus, I love period pieces. And Fredo's moustache.

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casual

Saturday Timewaster: Attention Hog

Posted by Maggie Greene at 5:30 AM on August 17, 2008

From Chris Basmajian comes a darling, piggieful little game called Attention Hog. As the titular attention hog, your job is to capture the attention (and love) of as many people as possible, while avoiding bacon and nabbing power ups to make your job a little easier. Basmajian says the game "reflects some of the social and psychological trends present in social-networking communities, including self-promotion, social anxiety, obsessive need for peer validation, and distraction as entertainment". Heavy stuff. Ian Bogost notes that while he's "happy to see a game that critiques today's attention culture, but I'm not sure Attention Hog reaches the level promised in the description". Still, while I'll admit to being a sucker for cartoonish pigs (my little Monokuro Boo collection is probably a touch unseemly for a 25 year old), it's adorable and worth a few minutes of time on a lazy weekend.

Attention Hog [Chris Basmajian via Water Cooler Games]

wii

KORE Resurrected for Wii from '03 Xbox Title

Posted by Owen Good at 5:00 AM on August 17, 2008


Here's the debut trailer for "K.O.R.E.", which we're told is the resurrected The Kore Gangthat was planned for Xbox way, waaaay back earlier in the decade. Now the "outvasion from inner space" is coming to Wii. Looks like a madcap action/platform sort of in the style of Destroy All Humans. You get to run around as one of three mad scientist aliens in funky exoskeletons. The developer is Snap Dragon Games. So do you like teh "K.O.R.E."? Do you not like? There's an 11-minute gameplay video on the jump if you want a closer look. No word on release date.

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game design

'What I Learned From Not Playing Civilization'

Posted by Maggie Greene at 4:30 AM on August 17, 2008

The August '08 Blogs of the Round Table is up, with the subject being what positive lessons writers have learned from video games. It's a diverse crop as usual, and Chris Bateman at Only a Game looks at what he learned by not playing a game: Civilization in this case, or any Sid Meier game, for that matter. And what did Bateman learn from not playing? Well, a few lessons on the audience for games in general:

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casual

Worlds in Motion with Orbitrunner

Posted by Owen Good at 4:00 AM on August 17, 2008

Alright class, time for a flash game. This is "Orbitrunner" and it's reasonably addictive for such a simple concept -- place your star on the grid so that the planets (and their satellites) fall into orbit without smashing into you, each other, or going out of the boundary. I'm not sure how realistic the gravity physics are, but it's very challenging, and I like the background music. The collision/explosion sound/animation is lame, however. I was hoping for a Praxis Effect. If they put this in a 3D, rotatable-camera environment, I'd play it for hours.

You can skip up to five levels if you find you're just not getting the hang of one. It stores your IP address and lets you continue.

Orbitrunner [Gamezhero.com]

industry news

China's Gaming Market Going Up, Up, Up

Posted by Maggie Greene at 3:30 AM on August 17, 2008

In totally unsurprising news, China's game market continues to climb — numbers just posted for the second quarter of 2008 show an 11.2% increase over first quarter, and a nearly 66% increase from the same quarter last year (!). In terms of market share, Shanda leads the pack with a 17.9% share, with other big companies hovering below that.

The current market is estimated to be worth 4.43 billion yuan (around $US 645 million), and with no predicted slowdowns, one wonders what we'll be seeing this time next year (or even fourth quarter of '08). And with companies like Perfect World making a foray into Western markets, we'll just have to wait and see where China's industry is heading long-term.

China market: 2Q08 online gaming services valued at 4.43 billion yuan [Digitimes via GamesIndustry.biz]

real world

Forgive Dad, He Knows Not What He Does

Posted by Owen Good at 3:00 AM on August 17, 2008

So do the proud consoles die ... crucified, not on a cross of gold, but on a humble backyard poplar in Mechanicsville, Va.

Reader Daniel S. sent us this is from iReport -- the "citizen journalism" site CNN launched. Citizen Journalist Mum said Citizen Journalist Dad "repeatedly warned" Citizen Journalists Jr., III, and IV about "their behaviour" (I guess that doesn't mean rocket-jumping, PIT manoeuvres, or killing hookers) while playing the Xbox. Left unsaid, but if I know dads, there was probably some tired-of-it-all ultimatum along the lines of "I'm gonna nail the goddamn thing to a tree". And when their antisocial act-outs continued, he followed through.

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industry news

A Quick Q&A On Google Lively

Posted by Maggie Greene at 2:30 AM on August 17, 2008

A few weeks ago, Bonnie Ruberg wrote about a few gripes with Google Lively's user interface and chat system; Mark Young, the user experience designer for Lively, quickly got back regarding the complaints and the two shared an interesting little Q&A on future plans for making Lively more user friendly. On the topic of what bits of the interface are still being tweaked, Young had this to say:

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humour

A Gallery of Madden Glitch Goodness

Posted by Owen Good at 2:00 AM on August 17, 2008


Ah, football and August -- fresh cut grass, training camp, two-a-days, puking, pre-season football, the release of Madden and, about 3 seconds after that, the reports of the first Madden glitches. Unlike last year's bugfest, it's been reasonably quiet so far. But paging through YouTube on Friday I found a plethora of classic, often hilarious Madden glitches, plus one of him perhaps subconsciously drawing a wiener on the telestrator in real life.

We lead off with the Madden Ambulance Montage (love that title card) above. You can watch the health care professionals (oath: "First, do harm".) in John Madden Football '92 cut a path of destruction through the uninjured players on their way to pick up the crumpled halfback -- with slo-mo replay, too. Many more clips after the jump.

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real world

But the Bride is in Another Castle!

Posted by Owen Good at 1:00 AM on August 17, 2008

Newlyweds Frank and Paige Hackett are gamers, he on his PS3 and SNES (yep), she on her DS and PSP. They're also, in Frank's words, a "short Italian guy and much taller blonde girl". So it would follow that that thing, above, would be the cake at their wedding last weekend. Frank provided us the source pictures and we'll have an architectural discussion on the jump.

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announcements

Kotaku Originals: About Last Night ...

Posted by Owen Good at 12:00 AM on August 17, 2008

So that thank-you note thing was weird. Yeah, it's a nice gesture, but the wording and the tone, I dunno ... it reads like the kind of apologetic, elephant-in-the-room e-mail a guy would write to a woman he disappointed with lousy sex the night before. Oh, Ninty, we know we can be difficult to please, and we know you'll do better next time. Muwah.

A.J., our new San Francisco correspondent, rode some ferry boat and got a bottle of Cristal and a massage and a look at Godfather II; Microsoft had some 'splainin to do re: Final Fantasy XIII and Asia; and Midway and NCsoft joined forces to send like 100 developers to the Austin, Texas unemployment office this week. Those plus some other highlights, with the full list of Kotaku Originals on the jump.

Godfather II First Impressions
NCsoft Lays Off 21
Godfather II: The Don Treatment
Microsoft Clarifies Final Fantasy XIII Asia Version Clarification
Midway Boss Explains Lay-Offs, 'Career Criminal' Cancellation To Rank And File
Strong Bad's Cool Game For Attractive People: Homestar Ruiner Review
Braid Review: Time, Time, Time, See What You've Done To Me?
Spite Bowl and Taco Bell: Ruminations on a More Social Madden

Epic's New Game - President Tells All
The Odd Couple - EA & Grasshopper or Suda 51 & Shinji Mikami
Celebrity Sports Showdown Impressions
Halo 3 Plasma Pistols
Boogie SuperStar - Objectifying And Empowering Tween Girls Everywhere
Tetris, Spore, Scrabble and Sudoku - EA's iPhone lineup
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince - Wii Impressions
Battlefield Heroes - Battling The Stigma Of Battlefield
I Am 8-Bit And So Is The Rest of Hollywood
Capcom Still Has "Ace Up Its Sleeve" For Bionic Commando
Texas Gamer: U.S. Arcades Never Say Die!
On the Road to PAX
Best Buy Fallout 3 Pre-Order Goodie
WoW Gold Site Advertises With Gnome Corpses
Patapon and Oblivion Get Budget Priced In Japan
Activision Blizzard's Preliminary Self-Tender Results
Tropic Thunder Movie Pimps Wii, Gaming
Frankenreview: Madden NFL 09 (PS3)
Brett Farve? No EA, It's Brett Favre
Madden 09 Launch - GameStop Goes The Extra Yard
NBA Ballers Lead Designer Leaves Midway
Nintendo Says "Thank You" For Watching Its E3 Press Conference
EA Announces New Puzzle/Adventure DS Title
China Brings Bullshots To The Olympics
First Details On The New Batman Game
Ninja Gaiden II Freezing Problems, Temporary Solutions
Midway Axes 80 to 90 in Austin?
Limited-Edition Pokemon DS Pack Announced!
Fallout 3 Cleared For Australian Release [Update]