@Ad-hominem: You have an amazingly strange idea of what is creepy.

It's a *game*.

Now if that grown man was inviting little kids over to play Cars *with* him... then we're talking creepy. Simply enjoying a game regardless of what the content is, is not.

MrBionic

2. The controllers are indeed too complicated.

Please, try playing battletech in a tesla pod with all controls activated.

Or the quake 2 'king of the server' mod.

lordargent

dunno...coulda been better. For a nongamer the example knew too much about games.

Ahmunnaeetchoo

I agree with most of the list and I enjoy shmups, the masochist of gaming.

SkutSkut

"16. You are not persecuted.
Until someone starts telling gamers where they can eat and whom they can date, they have not been persecuted. People calling video games "kids' stuff" is not persecution. Stop playing Call of Duty and go read a history book."

Yea, love how being a gamer automatically makes me ignorant of history and all.

Helkaurain

Also, this list might have been funny 10 years ago, maybe, if you held it up to the light (and squinted a bit), but it's really just blah. The only reaction I can muster to this list is *shrug*.

AngryLagomorph

@MrBionic: Uhh..yeahh...A grown man playing the Cars game isn't creepy at all...

Ad-hominem

That list made me want to kill some non-gamers, actually.

Jayge

@Mr. Tambourine Man: Pokeman is pokemon. Nice and funny list

Dorikasu

@TrekVogel: Most people don't know Portal exist lol...

Suda51

To my friends;

22. Game stories bore me.

10 minute stories about 5 minutes rounds are not cool. I hate your stories and I hate you because when we actually play you never leave the bottom of the board. Either quit telling me your stories or start killing.

vex-solo

@Ad-hominem: I was going to use the racial thing to say why I made my list, and that his list annoys me because after a while stereotypes are not just funny.

So in the end I just decided to poke fun at him lol. But the reason I am responding to you is just because, I have seen a ton of people run into a room, and tell me things like "Hey Kevin they got KFC down the road with grape soda, I think they want your money!" and then justify themselves with its just a joke.

Suda51

Persona 3 is not an MMO. And it's a lot of fun. With all due respect: don't knock it 'till you've tried it, and you obviously haven't!

Swift_

I mostly agree. It's the way most people view gaming. I don't see how this annoys anyone though.

TrekVogel

Persona is not an MMO, its an rpg. Are yolu the same guy that made this mistake last week when talking about Blizzard games? If so, do you actually play games?

AngryLagomorph

@Thunder-1: Yeah. This bugs me even more.
"It's a joke" is not an excuse for stupidity or poor ideas.
I mean, nobody runs into a room, and starts yelling out racial slurs, and then goes "It's a joke, relax!".
While it's an extreme example, stupidity is not tempered by the fact that it's a joke.

Ad-hominem

Not "LOL" funny, but "nodding" funny.

Fanboys frothing at the mouth at this mild list -- that's LOL funny.

Evil Tortie's Mom

There was a list like this on Digg last week; most of these seem to just be indicative of having a retarded meathead for a roommate and not a legitimate umbrella for "non gamers".

Shirleycakes

lol it makes me half gamer

Sexy.KOT69

@Absent Blue: In all seriousness, people who complain controllers are complicated then pull out there cell phones and use them.

It's like saying the DS has to many buttons while I'm typing on a KEYBOARD.

Suda51

That was a pretty lame list, non-gamers seem to know who Pac-Man, Mario and maybe Master Chief are, good luck with any other references like Portal or Final Fantasy. Oh but of course they know GTA, who doesn't?

I hear the controller one all the time, in my experience most people are just afraid to try new things especially with technology. Somehow a controller is too daunting but the prospect of learning something like guitar, "Can't be that hard"

Absent Blue

@seldon452: Madness...?

THIS IS KOTAKOOOO!

(first?)

drunkentyger

@Suda51:
This is better than the list.

Shykin

I hate the way people give the finger like that in the pic. It looks so awkward.

Scott3D

Resident Evil is the best survival horror resident evil in the series. Resident Evil 4 is the best shooter resident evil in the series. Two seperate gameplay styles associated with the same name. Not fair to compare the two.

nuff said...

scottreich

It's a nice world he lives in, where non-gamers know so much about games. In my world non-gamers don't know or remember game-names, don't even suspect the existence of consoles, and at best thing "oh, games are where you click on a dot, hear 'arrgh', repeating this again and again all day". And worst of all, when they learn I barely go out except for basketball (I also work from home), they imagine I watch the walls and ceiling 24hrs/day and communicate with no-one.

somarix

now that's funny. Can't disagree with any of it

Striderhayasa - Phillyyakk on PSN and Live.

why gamers annoy us non-gamers?

simple: they're boring if they dont talk about games.

Amiash is walking (again)

@Suda51 Your list was much better. This annoyed me too.

TheNinja256

Hipocrisy at its finest! Way to go dude, you win teh internet!

GlibGamer

oh kettle thou art black sayeth the pot.

youareivan

@Suda51: pretty much summarized what i was gonna say.

some funny stuff there, also i am amazed 1337 talk wasn't included.

Milkzhakes

Hey! Persona 3 is a cool game!

AxelMinami

@Thunder-1: Dude, don't you know, the internet is SERIOUS business.

Suda51

@Simple_Man:

That is the truth.

tooji

I'm pretty sure that list was more or less a counterpoint to this list - [www.gamesradar.com]

DoubleOh-

@karasu is my homeboy: But spending 65 bucks on a shirt is pretty out there for me, who has shopped at Walmart and bargin place's all my life. If you spend large amounts of money on something that has no special general use why are you spending large amounts of money on it? There are two shirts, one cost 100 dollars and one cost 10 dollars. Both of them protect you from the elements but one says "Fubu" on it, why should I waste $90 on the letters F U B U, its like its telling you fuck you bitch uboughtthisshitfor100buckshahaha.

Also, that just seems a little whiny on the girls side, "He spent money on something that wasn't for ME!!!"

Suda51

Who pays $600 to play games? No console costs that much...

Kenny

@cornunderscore2x: Haha, classic. Gather them.

Candlejack

I agree that this list is stupid and isn't what its title indicates. I amuse my non gamer friends, because the only time I bought something at Uniqlo was when I got 2 MGS4 shirts and a autograph from mr. Kojima.
Also, I play Counter Strike quite a bit, and that's the just the stereotypical geek thing. At least I'm not into WoW.
But I end up being good help when they decide to buy a game (it happens) and I know which one I think they'd enjoy.

biznatch

Uhhh whatever. I'm not offended as a gamer, I'm offended as someone who likes funny things and found that sorely lacking.

periodical

I'm certainly not going to defend gamers as a whole because yeah a lot of us can be super annoying.
And I get that the author was trying to be funny/edgy so I'm hardly taking this too seriously.

But honestly, how can "Game stores bore me." be true if you have played enough of the series to be of the opinion that Final Fantasy VII was the best one?

Also, point of interest.
Persona 3 was not an MMO.

Diddy_Mao

@Ad-hominem: All the others are objective, and arguably true, but there's nobody under the age of ten who can enjoy Licensed games.
You don't walk out into public as an adult and say "I love Sesame Street and Power Rangers", do you?
They're not geared to anybody under the age of ten, and if you like them, it's creepy.

So all licensed games are from licenses geared to really small kids?

It's creepy if I like playing something from Disney? (I believe Cars was mentioned.)

Man, I despise blanket statements.

MrBionic

"23. I will not read a book or watch a film based on a video game."

And hopefully most gamers won't either.

Lstormy10

Resident Evil 2 is the best game of the series and one of the best games of all time.

Ryuzaki

i bet this guy is a hoot to be around...

seriously the opinions of a guy that claims not to know who Akira Kurosawa is means nothing to me

Danner

@Jayl3w: I got that. It just wasn't funny/clever. What IS funny, are the reactions he is getting. Maybe that was the real point of it all.

ShadowXion

So this is the guy who is buying all the liscenced shovelware and minigame compillations. Shall I gather the pitchforks?

cornunderscore2x

@Suda51:

You should also take a better read to know this author was just playing around. Getting a rise out of people like is exactly why lists like these get made, get a grip you take this way too seriously.

Thunder-1

well
all but 23,24 (theres actually books for videogames? talk about nerdy) and 25 apply to me.
is this bad?

komoki

I agree with a few, like FF7 not being the best, RE2 not being the best, 600 being alot, and the dressing up as cloud, for example.... And not all game-stories are boring.

But Zelda doesn't exactly have to be hard-edged (edged?) , but it sure as hell can't be ridiculously easy. The only easy Zelda game (or at least the easiest) was Phantom Hourglass. Minish Cap was short, but still much more enjoyable.

Anyways, that was a great read.

Mesren_Makai

s/nerd/douche bag/g

balls187 upside yo head

@Ad-hominem:

It's a joke, RELAX.

Thunder-1

@ShadowXion: Thats a bit of the point, putting all the over-stated jokes and thoughts on the gaming community and putting it together.

To me, it's meant to be read and then chuckle at yourself for how many of them apply to something you've been guilty of yourself.

Self-parody is my height of comedy.

Jayl3w

@Ad-hominem: I do, I even cover that one power rangers song on my guitar!

Suda51

Bejeweled is actually very fun, it's the best game to kill time in the office

dhlt25

1. Halo is not a sport.
No more then things like ping pong.
2. The controllers are indeed too complicated.
Only if you can't operate your microwave.
3. No, I have no clue what happened in Mega Man 4.
Then I advise you to go play it.
4. I don't need 502 ways to decapitate my opponent.
But who ever cried at variety?
5. No, I do not need to read a FAQ to find all 502 ways.
Then don't, problem solved.
6. Zelda games do not need to be hard edged.
Good for them?
7. Resident Evil 2 is not the best in the series.
Unless, you know, you liked it the best.
8. Final Fantasy VII is the best Final Fantasy.
Only if you ignore almost every other Final Fantasy game ever made.
9. I find Wii Sports to be incredibly fun.
So do we?
10. I own a PSP and have not installed custom firmware.
It's not my fault you hate homebrew.
11. I really like Guitar Hero.
So do...millions of gamers?
12. I don't really like drawing maps to play video games.
Um ok.
13. Madden Football is good enough.
Wait, your the non gamer, go play real football.
14. Portal was a fun game and not a religion.
Anything can be a religion these days, see "Scientology"
15. I need help playing games sometimes.
Um don't we all?
16. You are not persecuted.
Ok.
17. Sorry, but dressing up as Cloud makes you a nerd.
It's a geek, get it right idiot.
18. $600 is a lot to play video games.
This was one of the gamers main argument against the PS3, so nice logic.
19. I will ask if you have Pac-Man or Donkey Kong.
Wow most gamers today don't even get that.
20. I don't want to join a clan.
I'm hardcore, and I don't either.
21. I like licensed games.
A lot of people do.
22. Game stories bore me.
Because there not like every other mediums stores amirite!?!
23. I will not read a book or watch a film based on a video game.
Because reading is for noobs, and game films suck.
24. I have no idea what a PokeMAN is.
I herd u liek mudkipz tho?
25. I enjoy Bejeweled.
So does my mom.

I should make a list of why list like this annoy me.

Suda51

anybody kind enough to tell us what is a pokeman?

Silenced

I have to say I don't agree with him on twenty-one.
All the others are objective, and arguably true, but there's nobody under the age of ten who can enjoy Licensed games.
You don't walk out into public as an adult and say "I love Sesame Street and Power Rangers", do you?
They're not geared to anybody under the age of ten, and if you like them, it's creepy.

And 18? Well, yeah. It's a lot of money. But if it's what you enjoy, does it really matter?
I mean, I don't go out to the lake and say "Haha! You retard! You spent $30,000 to float on water." Or to skydiving aficinados and go "$1000 is a lot to spend on a piece of cloth and the chance to kill yourself."
If it's your hobby, what you enjoy, it's not a lot.

Other than that, a pretty fair, and mildly humorous list.
And, Owen. You big meanie. Persona 3 is not an MMO.

Ad-hominem

Who made this list for whom again? It kinda contradicts itself with many of those. Satire or not, most are the same tired recycled jokes we've been hearing for years.

ShadowXion

That was kind of sophomoric, if not amateurish. There are a lot funnier satires of gamers out there. Boo, Owen, boo!

bluetom00

@karasu is my homeboy: Hi, my name is Karasu and I'm made of Truthiness.

Señor Vorpal Kickass'o

I salute that fucking man.

/signAndAgree

i_9

Nobody likes gamers, not even other gamers.

Simple_Man

25 Reasons Gamers Annoy Non-Gamers, a.k.a. "Here are Random Facts About My Gaming Habits."

The list isn't really what I expected from the title. Spending $65 on a video game and not buying my girlfriend a shirt that costs $65 the same day is a reason gamers annoy non gamers.

Because he likes FF7? Not so much.

karasu is my homeboy

Intriguing...

I especially liked number 19.

HomerSapien

i agree with most of these. does that make me a non-gamer?

how does a non-gamer know what final fantasy is?

nathew

THIS IS SSSPPPAARRTTTTAAA!!!

DE5TR0YER

Madness?

DE5TR0YER

@Harfold: How could that annoy anyone?

rospaya

That's me to a T. Fuck all y'all haters.

InsidiousTuna

Um, I'm missing something there but I don't understand some points.....

WDYC

Oh noes, so I am a gamer!

BillyTheRatKing

I loved the Megaman 4 comment.

DukeOfPwn

I figured 1337speak would make an appearance somewhere?

Harfold

A non gamer who has played PORTAL?
And WTF is POKEMAN anyway?

Mr. Tambourine Man

Final Fantasy 7 IS THE BEST ONE!!! *Goes rabid*

damatman

BEJEWELED?!?! THIS IS MADNESS!!

seldon452

funny stuff

precursor31

He hasn't realized his fully gamer potential. But I can see that coming. Afterall who collects Pacman? Only hardcore game collector would have one.

Playstation

Reason #26: They can't take a joke.

newname42

@remanance:

1. They are always talking about how gamers annoy them.
2. They defend why gamers annoy them using sterotypes.
3. They say games are immature then go watch Saw 4.
4. They think we have no social lives whatsoever.
5. They assume the hours in which we play a game has some
reflectance upon our ability to get laid.
6. They constantly ridicule what we like to do, knowing nothing about it even though its similar to things THEY like to do.
7. They ask for Halo 3's Wii version.
8. "I don't play video games because there for children." They constantly say this then continue to say "We must get these games banned so children can't play them and only adults who need to be playing them."
9. They think were nerds, when were geeks, the noobs need to get it straight.
10. They call our hobbies expensive and pointless while driving cars that cost over 50 thousand dollars and are made to go speeds that they will never go.

Thats a start :D

Suda51

I was hoping it might be a more psychological list than what it was. Anyone have any recommendations on books or articles exploring the gamer society/psychology and why so many of us tend to be complete cock mouths once we log on?

Is it simply that there's no repercussions for being a complete ass once online? I tend not to think so; I'd be willing to bet there's some psychological need for them to be a jerk. I guess I'd rather have them do it online rather than physically beating their girl or children or dog or whatever, but they're questions that I want destroyed with answers.

BigPanda

While I agree with the first point, the other points sounds like he's just being a douche.

Scuba Steve

@Suda51: I think we can cut down this entire list and just put up a picture of you.

Spenze

One of these days, my utopian paradise that consists of a complete eradication of the idea that certain games are only for certain people will come to pass.

Right?

*sigh*

MrBionic

lol, i like reason number 1

shiznit

Heh. He thinks WE annoy him? We gamers can come up with true reasons why non-gamers and to an extent, casual gamers (Same thing?), annoy us.

remanance

@FreakyFavabean: FF9 *was* awesome.

Very awesome.

Although I think IV might be my favorite right now, but only because I'm playing it.

MrBionic

this list is just a bad trolling attempt, because nongamers wouldn't relate to many of these at all (the FFVII one for example.)

Hisdon

My only response to this list is:

FINAL FANTASY IX, DAMMIT!

SatansBestBuddy

@Ad-hominem: *smacks forehead*

MrBionic

@damatman: I loved FF7 until Sephiroth showed up. Kinda killed the atmospheric, future dystopian rebellion thing that was going on for me.

Again, FF9 is still my favorite, and no, I probably won't shut up about how awesome it is in any discussion about Final Fantasy.

FreakyFavabean

@Simple_Man : Nobody likes gamers, not even other gamers.

TRUE!!

Major_Higgins

Persona 3 is not a Massively multiplayer online game (MMO), but I get the point.

As for the list, whats to say? I know it was made for the laughs, but there is allot of truth in it. I've always believed that not everything is for everyone and trying to shovel your opinion down everyones mouth is likely to hurt your cause than do it any good, but yeah, I've been in situations like this and vice-versa. Whats that? No, I don't like Kanye West's music. No, I don't think the iPod is the greatest media device known to man. OK, I get that you like Will & Grace, but what does that mean to me?

It's not just gamers annoying non-gamers; it's when people try to force their interests and opinions on others thats always going to be annoying. You've got to give people a moment to ask before trying to bombard them with things they have little to no interest in. That's the problem with people, they're always trying to assimilate people into the hive instead of just showing the door and letting them walk in on their own. Until people can do that, there is always going to be a barrier of misunderstanding. Funny list by the way.

KeroseneClimax

@seldon452:

NO, THIS IS PATHETIC.

Casual Gamers annoy me.

kumuasata

@Silenced: i believe its DSS slang for a child molester, jk

i can pretty much agree with this list i guess thats kind of bad but i dont label myself as a gamer, just a guy that plays video games alot.

headcharge101

not really sure what the guy's trying to say (& i'm not so sure he is, either). &, yeah, the persona 3 comment didn't really cut it, either...

must be sunday...

semiconscious

Pretty much word for word from the article: "I don't know ANYTHING about video games. Let me support this statement with knowledge of all those video games I've played."

Honestly just sounds really whiny to me. And as much as I love Guitar Hero, Windwaker, and Resident Evil 4, I think this is a poorly written, poorly thought out list.

And Final Fantasy 9 is the best, in my opinion.

FreakyFavabean

@lordargent: $600 dollars is a lot to spend on leisure seeing as that could pay some peoples rent, but I would see that more as a economy problem then a game problem. Like you said, clothes, camera's and many other things rack it all the way up there quick to.

Suda51

I'm not sure this is entirely aware satire.
He says under the "I don't know what a pokeman is" section that he doesn't know who Akira Kurosawa is.

Akira Kurosawa was a master Japanese filmmaker, he had nothing to do with video games in any sense whatsoever.

Stavren

JOO GOT TROLL'D

Poo_and_Wee

@MrBionic: See. This is why...
The kind of guys who play Cars have plans like this already set up in their head.
...Or else how did you come up with it so fast?

Ad-hominem

I don't think this article was trying to be funny, at least I hope it wasn't, because it was not. If it were a slice of bread, it would be the really dry brown bread.

Anyway 'FF7 is the best FF game' kind of undermines the whole satire(?) of the piece. Yet I don't really think the guy was trying to be satirical (if he was, he failed). Yeah, so the tone is really uneven, which I guess is dangerous when you're pouring scorn on gamers, especially on the 'net, they'll pour back.

ps I was not trying to be funny.

basilafox

Non-Gamers like FFVII?

AngelMayLaugh

18. $600 is a to play video games.

Also, a lot of hobbies are 'expensive' these days. For example, I can drop $600+ on a camera lens easy.

Some people spend large amounts of money on their cars.

Some people are spending $600 on a few pieces of clothing.

In short, $600 isn't that much money to spend on something you like to do assuming you have a decent job.

lordargent

Ignoring the rather patronising tone for a minute, I actually agree with most of what's on here.
But, controllers are too complicated? How did the guy ever get past the unwieldy, 100-button beast in front of him and write the article?

WalkOnWater

@Helkaurain: Ironically the people who tell us all this stuff don't even have a full grasp on things like WW2, where they thing that everybody in Germany was a Nazi, and say "Stalin who?"

Suda51

What is really fantastic is how uptight and defensive people are being on here. It's funnier than the article, which is pretty funny itself.

SpiralJacobs

Sounds like this guy is some sort of professional (and I mean he gets paid) troll.

By the way #10 is pretty messed up. Being legit has nothing to do with being a gamer/non-gamer, it's the difference between being a consumer and a mouth-breathing douchebag.

art_zombie

I agree with all of them, especially the controller one. Yes, to you and me, this isn't very complicated:

[www.flickr.com]

But to a game noob that same controller looks like this:

[www.vintagecomputing.com]

Thorax

I agree with some of this...actually a lot of this is true and I've been saying it for years.

No, games aren't sports they're games...controllers are about as complicated as a keyboard and typing, you just have to get used to it and most non-gamers don't want to spend the time to do so.

I have no idea what happened in Mega Man 4. Needless to say I have no idea what happened in 1-7 either.

Why are there 502 ways in the first place? Seems like a random number...and why does someone take the time to put them all in an FAQ?

I'm not entirely sure what hard edged means. Nor do I know why Zelda needs to be hard edged.

Resident Evil 2 can be the best to whomever wants it to be. It's all subjective. Same with FF7.

Wii Sports is fun, yes. PSPs have custom firmware? Guitar Hero is OK, as is Rock Band. Why are we drawing maps to play a game?

Madden can always be improved, but I think that about anything. I wish I had the ability to play Portal like those lucky non-gamers that somehow knew about it and played it...everyone needs help sometimes, that's why FAQs with 502 ways to decapitate someone exist...

All cosplay makes people nerds. $600 is just the base price for the system I hope ya know...If you ask about Pac-Man or Donkey Kong when it's been over 20 years since those games came out then you're just an idiot...

I wouldn't want to join a clan. Licensed games can be good (Goldeneye). Some game stories are boring...others are fantastic and tell them fairly well. I don't know why books are based on games, and if you knew the movie was based on a game I'd be shocked...

If you can't tell that PokeMAN is Pokemon then you're slow...and I enjoy Bejeweled. Hm...this list seems troubled...

JGab

@Suda51:

lol. Now THAT'S more accurate. =D

remanance

Well he did just prove that many who consider themselves a "Gamer" are absolutely WAY too touchy, or maybe I'm just to damn old to bother being ultra defensive about superficial bullshit.

@Suda51:

Your the best example of this! And your not Suda 51 either, so stop it :p

Bando

Surely number 5 and 15 can't be on the same list =/

Shut up I don't need a FAQ!
Shut up I need a FAQ!

Zim

@lighten up, morrissey: It doesn't matter. I'm grouping them by target demographic, not quality. Martin Van Buren and Abraham Lincoln were both presidents, and can therefor be grouped together in that sense. While it's true you can't group them by quality, they fit in in that they were both America's Commander in Chief at one point.

@MrBionic: I may have intentionally pointed out the stupidity in his comment, but it doesn't change the fact that YOU'RE the one who first responded to me. You're the one who deliberately obtruded onto my statements. Does that mean you're an ignorant fool, that I don't "get" you, and should ignore you? No, it doesn't, though I apparently have plenty of other reasons to do so.

Ad-hominem

"Madden Football is good enough.".....................................................................................

kagebutsu

you don't know who Akira Kurosawa or Michael Chabon was, best put down the controller and do some reading/viewing...

StratfordX

@seldon452: Madness???

THIS
IS
SPARTA!!!

DarthHater1137

@Simple_Man: I am in total agreement.

StarStabbedMoon

Owen, you went to all the trouble of linking an article about Persona 3, but didn't bother to find out it's a JRPG and not an MMO?

As far as this list being satire? Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't satire supposed to be witty?

Silent Predator

Well, that's not even funny. It could have been waaaaaaaay better. I didn't even smiled.

Leolio

not a fan of persona 3, owen?

Gypse-scum

#14 - AMEN!!!

hlfx

@Suda51: That counterpoint to the list was awesome!

as for the controller being complicated, well some people don't work well under stress and can't remember to press the right button. So the control is not complicated but the thought process is.

it sounds like the original list was targeting someone in particular.

Awoken

@bluetom00:

Yeah I agree, that was neither well written, funny, nor insightful.

And persona 3 is epic. And it is not a MMORPG, it just a JRPG.

Junpei IS the man

Tietsu

Did he… just compare Michael Chabon to Pokemon? Sure, there is some assonance, but Chabon is on an entirely different plane qualitatively and actually as artistic merit.

@Ad-hominem: Please don't group in Sesame Street with the Power Rangers, Sesame Street features some of the most memorable characters and best writing to ever grace television; Power Rangers does not.

+ Watch video

+ Watch video

lighten up, morrissey

@Suda51: True. But I can imagine more people know the phrase "The Cake Is A Lie" than know what it refers to...

relic1980

@Ad-hominem: Shame on me for not "getting" your deliberately obtrusive persona earlier.

Chalk another one up to the ignore bin.

MrBionic

I'm not so sure it's even possible for a non-gamer to NOT know what Pokeman is.

j00s

This should be called "25 Reasons Dumbass Non-Gamers Annoy Dumbass Gamers." I get that it's supposed to be satire, but honestly, that was pretty pitiful. The non-gamers I know aren't that ignorant or afraid of change. His non-gamer friends must be assholes. And Owen, play Persona 3 before you talk about it like that. It's not as fucked up as the head shooting makes it sound.

Placentasaurus

I don't see what any of that has to do with gamers annoying non-gamers.

Jorw

@newname42: A old played out joke that is not any longer funny, but just annoying.

Suda51

@newname42: Jokes are supposed to be funny.
Plus, that line is really unfunny when you consider that Owen already said it in the original article.

Of course, you're going to accuse me of having no sense of humor for pointing this out, nevermind that you weren't funny.

Ad-hominem

Sorry Owen, but SMT and Person are incredible, if unconventional, and therefore wildly creative.

The only one of these I can really identify with is the firmware on PSP - haven't put in the effort to getting down with all that. Although, if someone did it for me... I'd really like to play Super Mario World on PSP.

sir_carrot

my middle finger is better.

chaos_isnt_here

reason why other gamers annoy this gamer:

3. The expression "PWND"
It's a nerdy enough expression as it is, but its worse when its use isn't even warranted, like if a match was actually close. It IS possible to win without trying to be a dick and coming off a complete nerd. That option does exist.

2. Anonymity breeds bigotry
I cant play the most popular games (Halo3, GTA4) online without hearing hateful language spewed constantly. (thankfully, I hear it far less on more esoteric games like Vegas2 or CoD4)

1. Fanboyism.
If you want to be partisan about something, try politics, not something as absurd as brand-loyalty.

B-Minus

I consider myself a fairly hardcore gamer and I gotta say I agree with a large majority of those things. Honestly I love games but the majority of the gamer community seems to be populated with immature, ignorant, stubborn, narcissistic, and childish people who are so hell bent on getting the world consider video games to be so much more than what they are (and they are just that: games) that they behave like self-righteous connoisseurs and scholars of something that simply isn't on par with other forms of media yet such as books and film.

My favorite example is Bioshock. I'm incredibly annoyed by every gamer on the planet going on and on about how amazing the story in Bioshock is and how it ranks up there with the best any book or movie has to offer. It doesn't. Don't get me wrong, it's a big step forward and is far better than most other games. But it didn't do anything terribly original (go read Atlas Shrugged) and were it a book or a movie it would be one of things that people were talking about for a month or so and then would fall into obscurity.

The gamer community needs to drop the self-righteous attitude and realize there's a reason most of them are laughed at by society at large. If gamers want their medium to be viewed the same way books and movies are they need to stop comparing the current state of video games to years of classic cinema and literature. Scoffing at non-gamers because they enjoy casual games and then proceeding to compare Call of Duty to All Quiet On The Western Front isn't the way to advance the medium.

bkchurch

haha...I had a barbecue today and a bunch of people were showing me bejeweled on their cell phones. I know one kid who you'd never ever catch playing an rpg, and back five years ago he was gonna get sepiroth tatooed on his back-- because of his "deep affinity." with FF7.

BadTranslation

@Silenced: "Pokeman" is from a Simpsons episode where Bill Cosby asks a kid "What do you like to play?", whacky Cosby-antics ensue.

Here's the audio at least, and some descriptive imagery:

+ Watch video

TetsuBo

persona 3 fans! this is your chance for an all-out attack! :]

sakuragi

I don't get what he's trying to say. If it's satire, it's terribly written. It seems to me more like a gamer who dislikes that anyone else could possibly have different taste from him.

Mister Adequate

@SpiralJacobs: Of course. Another rehash of Owen's joke with no foundation.
...Okay, this is just an excuse so I can segue into my counter-example:
Zero Punctuation. THE most popular video game reviewer on the net, it's his job to brutalize, insult, and make fun of our favorite games every week. And we LOVE him.

Why? Because he's actually funny when making jokes about our hobby and us. I already illustrated this with the racism argument, but ignorant insults are not equal to humor.

Ad-hominem

@Thorax: I can't relate, my dad is old and cripple, when giving the controller and Dead Rising, at first he was a little "How do I..." then after that he was mowing down zombies and saying "I think this is the best game I ever played son" It's not the complications of the controller, rather the induvisual user's determination to actually use these. A person who has no interest in video games at all isn't going to want to learn what the controllers do, but if they HAD to they would and could.

Suda51

Controllers are not complicated. At all.

TheDaftPunk

The alternate title for this article is "The 25 Reasons Non-Gamers Annoy Gamers".

art_zombie

@Suda51: It's also not about the amount of buttons, but using all of them to manipulate a character in a 3D environment. This occurred to me when my mom wanted to try and play the first Ratchet and Clank. It was painful to watch. She just couldn't get the hang of using the analog sticks to move while attacking.

Thanks to that fun experience, she now mainly plays Bejeweled and Peggle.

Thorax

lay off the persona 3. there is nothing wrong with pointing a gun like object at your head to blast out your alter ego. also, if anything, persona 3's whole point at the end of the story was to live life to its fullest and to appreciate every moment you have alive.

tsukasa1288

@Suda51: Please, don't equate harmless fun-making of gamer culture with a joke about 9/11. They're nothing alike at all.

I'd still probably laugh at the joke, though.

SpiralJacobs

Someday gamers will stop whining about "casual gaming" and how it's ruining "hardcore games," despite Ninja Gaiden 2 getting decent sales and Grand Theft Auto 4 selling for truckloads of money.

Thorax

He should append another complaint to reflect the responses: gamers have no sense of humor when it comes to their hobby.

SpiralJacobs

@Thorax: Then god forbid he EVER pic up any device with more then three buttons such as a keyboard, cell phone, a washer, a dryer, a TV etc etc.

@Bando: I'm not touchy at all, just after a while things get old and you get tired of hearing them, especially when there not funny and done in bad taste. Of course, I could make some 9/11 jokes right now, and when you all flame me I could respond by saying "It's ok guys, I did it for teh lulz"

Suda51

I only take issue with #22. The stories do not bore you, you find them boring. The ownness is on the viewer, not the story.

dry-roasted-peanuts

Well, I agree on a lot of those things so am I not a gamer? :/

Lawl01

Yeah, hardcore gamers annoy the hell out of me sometimes too (some of the comments on this post only confirm exactly why that is...it's mostly the hostility toward people who don't play games as much as they do), but this list still doesn't really make sense. There are plenty of hardcore Guitar Hero and Madden fans out there. And most of the "non-gamers" I know don't even know what Portal is. I think there's some gray area between hardcore gamers and casual gamers. That's where I fall. I just play the games I enjoy and don't feel the need to pretend I belong to an elite club because I'm pretty good at Rock Band and I really liked GTA IV and Portal. I've never even played a Final Fantasy games because I don't like RPG's. Every gamer doesn't have to be a scholar of every game that comes out to be "legitimate." Some of us just game for fun.

DarthAthema

@SpiralJacobs: Being insulted is not the same thing as being persecuted.
I mean, unless you call yourself persecuted every single time somebody calls you stupid, you'd have to be insane to compare the two.I just said that what he's saying are lousy insults.
And they're not funny. Ignoring the fact that only gamers will get the "jokes" in question, saying stuff like "Golf is not a real sport." and "Movies bore me" would just look stupid, wouldn't it? But it's the same thing he's doing here.
Or, maybe it's that he's picking on an incredibly niche subject that makes it so stupid.
I mean, it's one thing to make funny jokes about video games, it's another to make obscure, insulting references to all video-game players based off of a tiny fraction of them. I mean, even atheists and Christians don't insult ALL of the opposing group in their "humor". They only insult the hardcore and the crazies.
Or maybe it's the fact that he's completely ignorant. "Go read a book." "I've never heard of Michael Chabon". Well, then why are you telling us to go read a book? It's clear he's never paid a lick of attention to literature, because Chabon is one of the most incredible new writers of this decade, even according to elite literary circles and critics.

Ad-hominem

"16. You are not persecuted."

Uh huh. And what would you call a list of twenty-five reasons gamers annoy non-gamers? A list full of generalizations, assumptions, and declarative self-indulgent statements? Not to mention the media's demonization of video games and the people who play them?

What next, a list of twenty-five reasons why black people annoy white people, chock full of references to watermelon, fried chicken, and the purity of the Caucasian superman?

camdentayler

@BluFire: How are #2, 3, and 6 bad? Those most certainly don't apply to all gamers and probably a lot of non-gamers are like that too.

Codemasterflex

final fantasy 7 sucks. it may have been revolutionary when it first came out but many of squenix's later rpgs are better in every aspect (xenogears had a much better story, ff8 was better in both graphics, combat, depth, and length)

maraxusofk

@Suda51: Absolutely, I'm afraid to think of the many memes that would overflow out of that site if the empire strikes back was released in this day and age.

SamuelJackson1

THIS LIST. ITS SILLY.

pandafresh

@BluFire: We know its satirical. We are all having fun on here. Except for you of course who has to call everyone an asshole.

BigDerf

Also, seriously you guys, who the FUCK cares about the list? Do you really need to take the list point by point and make a counterexample for each one? It's supposed to be light-hearted and satirical. Please don't be more assholes than you already are.

BluFire

@SpiralJacobs: A non gamer would get portal is not a religion or I haven't played Megaman 4? Tiny amounts of this list could actually be comprehended by a non gamer.

@SamuelJackson1: Y so srs? No no I kid I kid. But seriously, thats a double standard. It's ok for star wars because it wasn't on 4chan but not this is sparta. You know Luke I am your father would of been all over 4chan if 4chan existed then.

Suda51

"He should have thrown something in about inscrutable Asian MMOs. I get that it's an acquired taste but, really, blowing your own head off to activate your powers? "

Persona 3 is an RPG, not an MMO. And the use of gun shaped evokers are far more symbolic than anything else, considering the existence of evokers of other shapes within the game. But you keep trying ;)

Turambar

1337speak?
Thats 'lite speak, right?
(Elite, to the late person who does not understand how to correctly use apostrope's)
Yeah, I hate that shit too.

SadSadSamus

According to this list, I'm a non-gamer?

Accuracy-fail!

lumpi

This doesn't seem like a list that a non-gamer would make up. This is more like a "Top reasons that casual gamers get mad at Hardcore gamers about during conversations with them."

Pretty lame if you ask me.

mordennight

@BluFire: Love number four. So true. Depth in games means being slapped with cliche by a hamfisted writer.

That being said, BioShock had some pretty great storytelling.

SpiralJacobs

@Suda51: The thing is, those catchphrases weren't butchered by the internet (I'm looking at you 4chan)

There is such a thing as overexposure, and there are some things that shouldn't be run into the ground (like the 300 catchphrase, it was really badass the first time anyone heard it)

SamuelJackson1

@Suda51: I know it is written by a gamer, but it's actually something that a non-gamer could read and identify with, if he has had contact with gamers or has gamer friends. Zero Punctuation would be an incomprehensible pile of jargon and in-jokes to a non-gamer. How is this list in bad taste, at all? How exactly do you define bad taste?

SpiralJacobs

The OFFICIAL List of Reasons Why Gamers Annoy Non-Gamers:

1. Gamers are assholes to each other, and are even worse when talking to people who (they think)don't know games as well to them.
2. Gamers like to write pretentious, long-winded essays on the internet, especially in an argument or just to prove somebody wrong in general. For example, somebody will write an essay about how this list does not apply to them or about how this list sucks.
3. Gamers like to argue.
4. Gamers like to treat games as literature, in that they think that games have deep meanings and complex plots any time there is a dramatic plot twist or pretty-lookin' setting.
5. Gamers socialize more with their computer/TV screen than other people.
6. Gamers can't share.

BluFire

26. People are taking this seriously? Really?

CockroachMan

@SpiralJacobs: If you haven't noticed, this was made obviously by a gamer, for gamers, and to gamers. This is a satire, its not serious, but its in horrible taste and not funny at all.

Suda51

wow.. this list is just not funny...
not that it offends me in any type of manner as an gamer.
It's just not funny, this could be done much, much better.

foxhound009

@Thorax: Yeah but 5 to 10 minutes ISN'T THAT MUCH. To simplify something so people won't have to take a 5 to 10 minute learning curve? That isn't that much, and if people have no motivation whatsoever then thats there problem. Now this is by no means a Wii rant, I like the Wii and I like my Wii. This is aginst the general controler rant. The fact is, there not that complicated, and actually have less of a learning curve then most electronics. The only one's who are complaining or dissatisfied are people with no interest with this medium to begin with, like your mom. My dad on the other hand is open to anything, and enjoyed Resident Evil 4 as well as all the other games, but is far from a gamer. He just gives the things that look kind of interesting a chance, and I'm not hating on you daddy but he's not the smartest person you will meet, or the quickest, so the fact even HE can learn just means that the only limitation with learning how to use these controllers is the one set by your own mind.

Your never going to lift that X-wing there if you keep saying "I can't"

Suda51

@Ad-hominem: Zero Punctuation is by gamers, for gamers, and only enjoyed by gamers. It's not offensive to gamers because it's not serious about it's game bashing, and it's part of the insular gamer world. Gamers are far too myopic, hence their lack of humor about themselves when it comes from a distance.

Your comparison of these 25 harmless, humorous reasons to racial slurs is silly at best, and you should really take a look at number sixteen...

SpiralJacobs

Either the writer is an arrogant asshole, or he is really, really bad at satire, which also makes him an arrogant asshole.

Spaz569

Argh, I AM TAKING THIS LIST SO SERIOUSLY RIGHT NOW >:(

Aye Mak Sicur

@SamuelJackson1: To this day, you still hear people say "Asta la vista baby" (Spelling is wrong I know but thats not the point.) Some things are just so good or epic that they will forever be a part of our society, even 20 years from now. Honestly to me it sounds like your even complaining about people saying "Luke, I am your father!"

Suda51

I'm a gamer and most of those annoy me too :P

And non-gamers haven't played enough Final Fantasy games to state that VII is the best..

CockroachMan

I just had to do it....Had so much to say about it I had to respond to em all....

1. Halo is not a sport.
-Thank you for stating something we already know for the thousandth time. I had to spend an hour explaining this to some kid last night. However, Madden Challenge is on ESPN.... All I'm saying.
2. The controllers are indeed too complicated.
-All I ask you to do is remember the locations of 4 face buttons and have the ability to distinguish Left (L1/L2/LB/LT) from Right (R1/R2/RB/RT). If that is too complicated for you please don't get behind the wheel of a car. You'll probably crash while looking down at the radio going "WHERE IS THE SCAN BUTTON" and making a left when you should go right.
3. No, I have no clue what happened in Mega Man 4.
-Really... who do you know that was talking about the story of Mega Man 4?
4. I don't need 502 ways to decapitate my opponent.
-Of course you don't. But If you only had 1 way you would sit there and bitch that the same thing kept happening over and over again.
5. No, I do not need to read a FAQ to find all 502 ways.
-Nobody said you had to. GameFaqs is not required reading unless you are too stupid to listen to where the game probably just told you where to go.
6. Zelda games do not need to be hard edged.
-No they don't. Everyone loves the Zelda gameplay regardless. I'd play Zelda if some kid drew that shit in stick figures. Give me gameplay or give me death!
7. Resident Evil 2 is not the best in the series.
-Who is arguing that point? I haven't heard anyone say anything bad about RE4. You are having trouble coming up with a full 25 thing list aren't ya.
8. Final Fantasy VII is the best Final Fantasy.
-I can't even argue this. FFVII is the shit. It's not the gamers that think it's not. It's the people who have to be different. "Everyone loves FFVII? Then I can't like it anymore. Let me like FFVIII cause no one else does"
9. I find Wii Sports to be incredibly fun.
-And I find the Wii to be a giant gimmick system. If Nintendo can do nothing else it can market.
10. I own a PSP and have not installed custom firmware.
-So you'd rather pay full price for all your games? But 600 is too much to spend on a system?
11. I really like Guitar Hero.
-Everyone likes Guitar Hero unless they can actually play guitar. Of course with a whole 5 buttons, a strum bar, a whammy bar, start select and home/PS buttons and a tilt sensor isn't the controller a little complex for you?
12. I don't really like drawing maps to play video games.
-I've never drawn shit from a video game on graph paper. Unless I get really...really...really intense building levels for LBP i don't think I ever will.
13. Madden Football is good enough.
-Once again see the FFVII response. It's only those who don't want to be part of the "machine" that wax nostalgic for NFL2k5 (I played it and hated it in 04 imagine how much it must suck now).
14. Portal was a fun game and not a religion.
-Who told you it was a religion? The vocal minority?
15. I need help playing games sometimes.
-Oh so you are going to Gamefaqs later? So you are too stupid to listen when the game tells you what to do?
16. You are not persecuted.
-Just cause we aren't being round up like cattle doesn't mean we don't catch a lot of shit for being gamers. See your whole list about what you don't like about us.
17. Sorry, but dressing up as Cloud makes you a nerd.
-According to most just playing FFVII makes you an "RPG Nerd". So welcome to the nerd club my friend.
18. $600 is a lot to play video games.
-And 4 dollars a gallon is a lot for gas. And $30-40 is a lot for a t-shirt. But hey at least my $499 dollar PS3 costs that much for a reason. Like that they are still losing money selling them for that much.
19. I will ask if you have Pac-Man or Donkey Kong.
-And I will ask you if you have the toys you played with as a little kid. Those used to be fun right? I know that you've got this nice HDTV we can watch. But i'd rather play with the catch the ball in the cup toy.
20. I don't want to join a clan.
-Why not? You'd rather play with random little kids online? Okay then.
21. I like licensed games.
-I know you like playing Cars with your kids. But your kids would have more fun playing Mario who is just as kid friendly just a better game.
22. Game stories bore me.
-Yet you love FFVII.
23. I will not read a book or watch a film based on a video game.
-But you will play a game based on a film?
24. I have no idea what a PokeMAN is.
-Are you a little kid? No? Then good for you on not knowing what one is.
25. I enjoy Bejeweled.
-I know you do you. I prefer something with a little more you know thought. Or an ending? Or something that makes me feel like I'm not doing the same exact thing for hours on end.

Alright. I'm done. No I'm not that serious about all that. Just wanted to give myself a little laugh.

BigDerf

@Suda51: And theres the rub; a non gamer can get the hang of using a controller to play a video game, but unless they are crazy determined to get the hang of things and willing to suffer through at least 5-10 minutes of painful and awkward learning, they probably won't.

My mom could of figured out Ratchet and Clank, but if she is already having such a hard time, then why bother? It's interesting to look at how gaming varies from other mediums in this way. The learning curve is pretty steep for noobs, even with a gamer friend holding their hands.

Thorax

14. Portal was a fun game and not a religion.

This is the only thing i agree with in the list...Honestly I'm starting to feel like killing someone should they tell me the cake is a lie. It's been over 8 months...we get it, you like portal. Stop mentioning the goddamn companion cube or Glados, it's annoying.

I would also like to mention the "THIS IS SPARTAAAA!!!" people. I wonder if they ever feel ashamed of themselves when they repeat this lovely meme.

SamuelJackson1

#1 They adamantly refuse to acknowledge that video game violence could be responsible for real world violence.

boogerwall

The reason that gamers annoy non-gamers is because we're a bunch of assholes who do nothing but flame other guys over the internet for about 30% of their day.

BluFire

Sounds more like he's airing personal grievances than speaking for a group.

Also, any FF after VI being considered the best?
Oof.

MiddWalrus

@Suda51: But again, unless they played games previously, why should they stick it out? How do they know that they will be missing something great, when they have never really experienced anything like it before? The mentality of a game for a non gamer generally comes from board or card games. Explain the rules, play the game to comprehend those rules, attempt to win while engaging friendly competition, have fun.

For a non gamer, they usually suffer when they first try and pick up a controller. Also, 10 minutes might not seem like much, but it can feel like an eternity when you can't understand why your character won't shoot the bad guy and instead walks into a wall of chainsaws.

I think there are a few basic ways developers can make their titles more noob friendly, while at the same not diluting the experience.

-The ability to save anywhere.
-Customizable controls.
-Difficulty settings that include "R Tard" as well as "Masochist."
-The option to adjust difficulty settings mid game.
-Having the option to skip certain sections of the game, such as a difficult boss fight, ala Alone in the Dark.

While most PC games have all these standard, there are still a good number of console games released today that don't. If they made them standard, I think it would really help the gaming virgins get the flow of things.

Thorax

@SpiralJacobs: Um did you know people are physically persecuted for there hobbies such as playing games? I know people, who before they hanged out with me, were not just simpled teased or called names, they were physically beat for playing a video game. They were labeled for a activity they vigorously took part in, and then persecuted for it. How is th