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PAX Panel: How To Get Your Girlfriend Into Gaming
Posted by Kotaku US Edition at 9:00 AM on September 1, 2008
Just for the record, readers, I'm here as a Plebeian (and I heart that word) - with a normal three-day pass I paid for with my own hard-earned money. I'm also hanging out with three friends and am subject to what they want to do, not what I want to cover. I have not once pulled rank as a Kotaku correspondent to score free shit or get into crowded events (okay, maybe once, but that was for The Conduit, which you can read about tomorrow).
You want PAX press coverage, you keep an eye out for Crecente's posts - he's the one with the official yellow pass. You want to know what you would go through if you were here at PAX, you read my stuff. Because I am you.
Now - onto another girl-centric panel; I've got a theme going, in case you can't tell. This little feminist number features advice from real girl gamers directed at guy gamers who are still stuck with crabby girlfriends that can't understand the "no, I can't go out tonight, I'm in the middle of a raid" excuse.
As panels go, this was one of the better ones because most of the questions were asked by the audience (and the sound quality in the room didn't blow). It was also one of the longer panels because people really got into the topic (also a plus). So if you can't be arsed to scroll down through this long (and paraphrased) transcription, here's a summary:
1) Give your girl a game that's tailored to her interests; don't force her to play a game just because you like it.
2) Play co-op, not competitive. Some girls are unnerved by 13-year-old trash-talkers.
3) Don't force her to identify herself as a gamer; it's enough that she's playing a game.
4) Spend as much time doing what she wants to do in her life as you expect her to spend time gaming with you (basic rule of relationships).
5) Don't act like an asshole while you're gaming - it makes games into the enemy.
6) Don't belittle her choices of game; maybe she likes Barbie's Horse Adventure.
7) Let her backseat game you and don't argue with what she tells you to do; if she tells you to make Master Chief jump to his death, just do it - it'll be fun for her and get her one step closer to trying it herself. (That's my own personal rule.)
The panelists (from the program, so any misspellings aren't my fault):
Christa Phillips (Xbox Live Community Manager)
Jane Pinckard (Editor-in-Chief, GameGirlAdvance)
Cori Roberts (Editor, Gameinatrix)
Shelby Wills (Producer, Pipeworks Software)
Nicole Tanner (Director of PR & Marketing, Foundation 9 Entertainment)
Introductions
Shelby: Started gaming with Oregon Trail and King's Quest 6. Got into gaming via osmosis - mum was a CPA with a computer in the days when computers were rare.
Christa: Started with Space Invaders on Atari and King's Quest 2.
Jane: Got started with Commodore 64, playing Load Runner and making impossible levels that can't be beat.
Cori: Likens first gaming experience to first crush. Pitfall Harry was her first "boy".
Nicole: Had the coolest grandma ever that bought the Atari 2600 to lure her grandchildren over.
Q: What are some of the barriers to entry for non-gamers and what can we do about them?
Christa: A big one is gamers acting like jerks when they play games. You throw the controller, act like a dick, and ignore company. The game becomes the enemy - like football.
Cori: People try to force other people to like specifically what they like. Girlfriends may not be into Halo, but they might like something else; so don't force Halo on them and expect them to love gaming.
Jane: Starting a non-gamer with something totally unfamiliar is bad. Final Fantasy will overwhelm a noob, but if they like soccer, they can identify with FIFA Street and get into it that way.
Shelby: People don't know that there are games out there for them. They might think Halo and GTA are the only games ever. You can't force it. Show 'em what's out there, let them try it. It's about exposure.
Q from the floor: My wife plays puzzle games with me, but she gets pissed if I beat her. And if I let her win, she acts like a dick. What should I do?
Jane: Do you need to play versus? Because there are good co-op games out there...
Cori: There are some XBLA games that are co-op.
Shelby: Try Boom Blox.
Nicole: My husband and I had a huge thing going with Puzzle Fighter. 6 hour battle to beat him - but it was rewarding. Don't just let her win.
Q: What are ideal games for introducing noobs?
Cori: Played Nintendogs at a Laundromat and a crowd of non-gamer women gathered around her to watch. The next week, they had each bought a DS for themselves.
Shelby: A few years ago, that question was a lot harder to answer. With the Wii and the DS, Nintendo basically is the answer. We got a Wii for Christmas a couple of years ago. The kids started playing the adults gathered around, even the anti-games ones. Pretty soon, they all wanted to play Wii Sports. My dad destroyed everyone in Bowling and Boxing. My mum did the same in Brain Age and then gave it to her mother.
Jane: Licenses are actually important. Name recognition can hook people. If Barbie is the girl's thing, get her the damn Horse Adventure even if you hate it. A lot of girls got into games because of Tomb Raider because it had a main girl in it.
Q from the floor: My girlfriend only plays Mario games. How can I get her to try something else?
Nicole: Sounds like she's a platformer. Try Ratchet & Clank. Insomniac is really great because they've perfected the difficulty such that it's not too hard or too easy.
Cori: Then you can move on to Prince of Persia.
Jane: My sister got into Ico. She got emotionally engaged in the story and it's just such a pretty game. Plus the controls are simple.
Q from the floor: Sixty-five percent of internet casual gamers are women. Is casual internet gaming the way to get people to cross over?
Cori: You're assuming those gamers don't play everything else.
Nicole: A lot of that has to do with access to the games. You can go to Pogo.com and play everything for free. Price is a barrier to access. It definitely is a starting point, especially with the iPhone and stuff. But what you need to do is show them a similar game on a console (Bejeweled on XBLA). And then ease them into Puzzle Fighter, etc.
Christa: Women in particular are intimidated to make the jump to consoles. They think of the console as a guy's thing or a kid's thing. Show them the other features (download movies, etc.) because then it justifies them spending money on it. Once you teach them that the console isn't the enemy, then they'll try it out.
Q from the floor: I'm a gamer, my fiancé is a gamer, my roommate's a gamer - his girlfriend is not. Rock Band is the one thing that she's kind of gotten into. But she really hates that we're into games; it's like racism - she's disgusted.
Jane: Some people are just "gamist."
Shelby: She might be an EverQuest widow. Look at how much you're playing and make sure you're not prioritizing games over her. Play when she's not home.
Guy: That feels kind of dirty.
Nicole: If she likes to go shopping, take her shopping. Spend as much time doing what she wants to do as what he wants to do - Relationship 101.
Q from the floor: My wife thinks of herself as a non-gamer. But she spends all this time playing solitaire. How do I get her to stop being a solo-gamer and get her to branch out from solitaire?
Cori: There are people that only play Halo. If she wants to play just solitaire, then let her play.
Christa: You don't need to get her to identify herself as a gamer. If she's happy playing solitaire, why try and force her to try something else?
Guy: I'd like to share games that I like with her. Not Gears of War, or anything, but like LittleBigPlanet or something...
Shelby: Casual games might be the next step for her. But you can't force it. Try a smaller step than LittleBigPlanet.
Jane: If she doesn't like versus online, start an asynchronous game with her on FaceBook.
Guy: Can you make a Jane Austen game? Because then she'd be all about it.
Jane: I'm working on it.
Q from the floor (and it's a girl!): I am a girlfriend who games and my fiancé got me into it because he bought me my own console. I think it's great to give a girl baby step, but don't underestimate them. I got straight into FPS games. Going online is extremely intimidating. Especially when you've got strangers yelling at you all the time. What advice would you give to anyone who wants to go online and fight the intimidation?
Christa: Join GamerChicks. If your girlfriend/wife is afraid of jumping online thanks to 13-year-old assholes, train with her, go into games with her. Hook her up with other girl gamers so her sisters can help her if she's getting abused online.
Nicole: There are some great online MMOs based around casual gaming like Puzzle Pirates. Everyone is super-nice on there and you don't get trash-talking.
Shelby: It's true, not everyone starts with the casual games. There's some huge percentage of women gamers on World of Warcraft, so you never know which game will do it for a girl.
Q from the floor: My wife plays games, but doesn't call herself a gamer. Is there still a stigma amongst women to identify?
Cori: Definitely. Some of the looks I get when I say I'm a gamer...
Guy: How can we get rid of it?
All: Time.
Nicole: For the longest time, it was just kids in basements that played games. It's not necessary to adopt the gamer label - playing the game is what counts, not identifying as a gamer.
Cori: Send her to GamerChicks. I have friends that guilt me for playing, but I stand up for myself and if she can learn to do that, it'll make her feel less ashamed.
Christa: Bring her to PAX next year.
Success Story from the floor: I bought Champions of Norrath and had to get three more controllers because all my racing gamer friends wanted to get into it. I wound up making different characters for different games and it was like I was cheating on one of them if I played with someone else ("I thought we were playing my game!")
Jane: Yeah, it's the co-op games that really attract people. Playing as a group is really healthy.
Christa: Give non-gamers an excuse to play. Like gaming for charity - "I'm curing breast cancer!" A lot of girls are looking for an excuse to game, but they don't want to be bad at it and they don't want to get made fun of.
Cori: Get girls to talk to each other about gaming.
Q from the floor: My girlfriend games, but isn't really into it. And she's not here because she's out of the country... but she said only nerds would go to PAX anyway. How can I get her to come to PAX next year?
Shelby: Tell her to come check out the "freak show." You've got pictures to back it up. Tell her "you've got to see some of this stuff." And everybody likes free stuff...
Q from the floor: My fiancé is really trying hard to get into gaming. She came with me to PAX (waves at her), but she has a problem with the controls. And she's an action-oriented martial artist, so she wants to do something like that, but gets frustrated. What can I do?
Cori: Do you have a Wii? Get Red Steel.
Jane: She's totally not alone. The Wii control scheme is what people want because it's simple to play.
Cori: Just cut people. That's what I did.
Shelby: There are a lot of games that don't use all the buttons - look for those.
Christa: Practice by yourself and get used to the controls. Eventually you'll get the hang of it.
Q from the floor: What are your opinions on games focused towards girls? Like misogynist games like Fat Princess or demeaning games like Bratz?
Cori: I look around and I see little girls playing on their pink DS lites - I hate pink. And I look at their mothers and they are not gamers, so I realise they won't buy their little girl something that doesn't look girl-appropriate. I'm not opposed to the girly stuff because who knows what that girl will grow up to play?
Nicole: Making games just for girls is not the answer. Make games for everybody. The Sims wasn't made for women, but it appealed to them. A company that aims specifically at women is going to fail.
Christa: Actually, Fashion Barbie games totally sell. I'm going to buy the Tinkerbell game for my pink DS (me too, me too!). Sexism is rampant, but games aren't the cause - they're a symptom. So bring on the sexist games, I'll play Imagine Figure Skating.
Shelby: A lot of games are great and parents need to go out there and find them instead of assuming all of them are either Barbie, or violent.
Q from the floor: Cute games sometimes turn out competitive and that can be a barrier (i.e. Bomberman). Is that a gender issue?
Jane: No. Some of those games have co-op modes because people like co-op modes. People get sick of getting shot at, so it's not a girl thing. It's a comfort level thing. I suck at Bomberman - but I can be comfortable with it.
Comment from the floor: I've seen girlfriends convert just because they play with other girls who game.
Q from the floor: My mum had breast cancer and suffered nerve damage, but she kicked my arse at Boom Blox. These games are based on other games (like hunting or bowling). Do you think that more intuitive controls are helping people get into it or the game behind the game?
Cori: It's the intuitive controls. The Wiimote looks like a TV remote, so she'll pick it up and play.
Christa: I think it's about content. Viva Piñata won my mother over because it's about caretaking and that's what mums do. She gets it, so she plays it.
Q from the floor (and it's another girl!): There's trouble with trying to get back into a game after hiatus. The stigma of sucking at something is so bad - it's focused on my gender. I suck because I'm a girl, not because I suck, is what they think. It makes me want to pretend to be a guy just to get away from it. How do you deal with that?
Cori: I just talk trash whether I'm losing or not. Try to enjoy the game until you re-learn how to play.
Jane: Join GamerChicks.
Q from the floor: I've got two little girl gamers. My wife will watch us play and get really into cheering - but we can't get her to game with us. She gets so excited she can't press buttons. And she feels so guilty when she plays a game for herself. What can I do for her?
Christa: Get her a DS and Animal Crossing. So she can put it in her purse and play it on the go and there's no guilt because you don't have to do anything and you can put it down whenever.
Cori: My grandmother watches me play Resident Evil 4. She'll get popcorn and she'll watch it like it's a horror movie.
Jane: It's inherently fun to watch someone play. So it's okay for her just to watch.
Q from the floor: I almost made my girlfriend a WoW widow and even though I recovered, I can't get my girlfriend to give games a second chance.
Shelby: Game by example. Show her it's okay and that you can game and be healthy.
Christa: Ask her to help you spot snipers. Chicks like flattery. If she feels like she's helping (calling her "a lucky charm" when you score a headshot), you're making it a positive experience.
Jane: I'm really bad with directions. I make my boyfriend navigate for me in GTA. Have you tried less hardcore games?
Guy: I'm really into RTS games, and she tried it out (Age of Empires), but she's worried about it getting too complicated.
Jane: Try the DS version. It's lighter on the strategy and it's turn-based.
Q from the floor: Are games where you create stuff more effective for hooking your girlfriend on games?
Christa: There's something to that. My daughter spent days designing a skate track she never used.
Jane: Spending two hours on building an avatar that looks like you... there's something to that.
Q from the floor: My girlfriend is interested in the idea of games - she used to play Tetris like seven hours a day, but she's never moved on. She avoids competition and online socialization of any kind. Any suggestions for her?
Shelby: Bejeweled? She might like that and Puzzle Quest.
Jane: Zuma.
Shelby: She can avoid online components in most games, so make that clear to her.
Nicole: There are so many "the shit keeps falling" games (her husband's term for puzzle games), but each adds a different element so that they're all similar to Tetris, but very different.
Guy: She's also scared of the controller being so big...
Nicole: I have tiny hands and I can handle it. The fear comes from being unfamiliar.
Christa: A lot of these games don't use all the buttons.
Shelby: And you can get them on the DS or something.
Christa: There are also games that are super easy. Try something more trivia oriented like Wits & Wagers or Buzz!
Success story from the floor (yet another girl): My friend was totally against games, but she saw me play Halo and Fable and liked both of them. But the controls scared her. I got her Fable on the PC and now she won't stop gaming.
Story of some kind from the floor: I have a friend, let's call him "Bort." Bort has a girlfriend from out of town... I used to hang out with him a lot. But now when Bort's girlfriend is in town, I go to his house to play games with her. She kicks my ass... Uh. I have a girlfriend, too.
*Awkward silence*
Admonishment from the floor (last girl in the line): For other girl gamers, be supportive to each other. And to the non-gamers, give games a chance!
Q from the floor: I go to a school where people are too snotty and smart to play games. I've won a few over with Guitar Hero, but I'd like to share artsy games with them. Any ideas?
Jane: Braid.
Shelby: Yeah, people eat up the existentialism. Smart people feel good playing that game.
Jane: And it deconstructs gaming - you could have deep discussions about it.
Last question: My girlfriend plays a couple games and is into music. She won't really play anything besides Rock Band. I'd like to get her into core gaming so I can have more fun with her. Any suggestions?
Jane: You do other things besides playing games, right? You should respect her interests as much as she respects yours...
Guy: She doesn't really do a whole lot... besides watching TV. She doesn't play very many video games. (Jeez, it sounds like he doesn't like his girlfriend very much...)
Cori: Look for a game that's a little bit more immersive. So you can talk about it the way you talk about TV shows.
Christa: Go for something with a strong storyline. Break down the games and the barrier is gone.
Comments (AU Comments · US Comments)
There are currently no AU comments for this post.
resetbutton
Posted 9:38 AM 1/9/08
i really enjoyed reading this article. Good job AJ Glasser!
resetbutton
Alyn
Posted 9:38 AM 1/9/08
I've been very lucky with my g/f, who has always been into games. And not Barbie's Horse Adventure! In fact she got me back into games during a time where I wasn't particularly excited by what was going on in the industry. She loves Castlevania, Skies of Arcadia and Project Zero/Fatal Frame just to name a few. Plus she just graduated from University and did a dissertation on the evolution of the videogame heroine - and got a 1st.
I feel bad for anyone that has to really fight to be able to play video games when they have a relationship - it can be great fun, and a fierce bout of Soul Calibur is always a good way to settle any arguements!
Alyn
lapiz
Posted 9:37 AM 1/9/08
@Xagest: rofl..
lapiz
Sam Smith
Posted 9:36 AM 1/9/08
@jonathan.: It would be fun, but at the same time oh so very weird. She dosn't dismiss it as nerdy or anything, she just has no desire to play most of the time. She has enough interests of her own, which is fair enough in my eyes.
Sam Smith
Calicomarie
Posted 9:35 AM 1/9/08
Give your girlfriend the chance to play games when you are not around. Take the console and a game you think she would like to her house, hook everything up so "you can play it," start a game so she can see it and then leave the console with her for a little while. If she's curious, she might try it when you're not around to see her fumble with the controller and try to figure things out. It can be intimidating to play a game you're unfamiliar with in front of an audience.
That's how my fiance got me into gaming. I'll play in front of him now, but not often. He likes to backseat game a bit to much, and it's frustrating when I'm trying to figure it out on my own and he chirps in with the solution
Calicomarie
Black-Dog-Howls
Posted 9:35 AM 1/9/08
Eh... Oddly enough I just had spent some time on TF2 plushies(frigging Spy backstabbed my thumb) and sent them(Spy and Engineer) to her with a little no going 'Spy be sappin ma heart.'
Made her wonder where it came from after the d-aww. Then, TF2 playing commenced.
I wonder if I still have the pictures of them on laptop... Valve was just too slow in making me the appropriate plush toys.
Black-Dog-Howls
jonathan.
Posted 9:33 AM 1/9/08
@Sam Smith: But it would be awesome to do that together. Come on, you don't think it would be cool to have a girlfriend that wants to stay in and play COD4 one night?
jonathan.
jonathan.
Posted 9:33 AM 1/9/08
I try to make my girlfriend play Bomberman on 360. I bought a pink controller for her. I unlocked the ballerina costume.
Nothing. :(
jonathan.
Kotae
Posted 9:31 AM 1/9/08
And my fiance should be thanking the lucky stars I'm a gamer and I don't have to tel him to make Master Chief jump off the cliff.
I'll do it myself, thank you.
Kotae
Sam Smith
Posted 9:30 AM 1/9/08
I dont see the need for ones girlfriend to like games at all. Mine dosn't, but she appreciates the fact I sure do. You dont have to do EVERYTHING together.
Sam Smith
2NinjasTapedTogether
Posted 9:29 AM 1/9/08
I've been with girls from both sides and... honestly, I'd rather having a gaming ignorant girlfriend\wife so I can bring home a new game and tell her I got it on sale for $10 or something.
Oh, if only.
2NinjasTapedTogether
topaz420
Posted 9:28 AM 1/9/08
It's easier to just go on Geek2Geek ( Gk2Gk.com ) and find a girl that already likes games.
Now, if only most of them didn't look like Michael Moore in a wig...
topaz420
ZinkO: USA WE DA BEST
Posted 9:27 AM 1/9/08
The Conduit tomorrow? om nom nom.
I'm waiting for the day when people won't divide gamers by gender. It's like the only big barrier in gaming interest there is.
ZinkO: USA WE DA BEST
PsycheE
Posted 9:26 AM 1/9/08
Some of you guys really need to stop bitching and moaning on her features. I cannot believe the amount of vomitspit I read on the Fallout/Harmonix fiasco.
Some of the panelists thought a bit too hard on this rather flimsy topic. I didn't know women had a disability when it comes to basic human motor skills.
PsycheE
Wizzard
Posted 9:24 AM 1/9/08
She's a Batman fan, that's good enough for me.
Wizzard
Zero1328
Posted 9:22 AM 1/9/08
Damn, Princess Peach has really let herself go. I guess that's what you get from being kidnapped all the time.
Zero1328
Ken
Posted 9:22 AM 1/9/08
Letting mine borrow my PSP/Patapon for the summer got her interested and now she plays Lumines and other games on my PC off steam, wants to play more on my DS and she actually woke me up cursing at Desktop Tower Defense on Kongregate.
The tide shall be turned :)
Ken
AssassinTRIP
Posted 9:20 AM 1/9/08
If my girlfriend likes Barbie's Horse Adventure, it's safe to say her things will be out by the curb when she gets home from work.
AssassinTRIP
JocktheMotie
Posted 9:15 AM 1/9/08
*Takes notes*
JocktheMotie
GlibGamer
Posted 9:14 AM 1/9/08
Hah, you tell 'em AJ. I for one appreciates the reporting from the viewpoint of the Everyman (woman?).
GlibGamer
Xagest
Posted 9:11 AM 1/9/08
*Looks at picture"
Um, the hero is gonna be in another castle. *leaves*
Xagest
hahnchen
Posted 9:10 AM 1/9/08
"Let her backseat game you and don't argue with what she tells you to do."
So, you're into the sub/dom scene then. Kinky.
hahnchen
Knoxximus (360/PSN)
Posted 9:07 AM 1/9/08
I kill Master Chief for no one. NO ONE.
Knoxximus (360/PSN)
sarcasmOD
Posted 9:56 AM 1/9/08
Any gamer dating networks out there? Or does one have to hope that eharmony has "gamer" as one of its 29 major personality matching traits?
sarcasmOD
kylo4
Posted 9:56 AM 1/9/08
If I was into a girl enough I wouldn't spend my time gaming, it doesn't detract from my life that much. I have a friend who's so obsessed with his gaming that he'll answer his phone, continue talking to her while he's gaming, hang up....and four hours later she'll call back and he's still at it. I just don't see the point. Out of anything I do, I'd hide/get rid of gaming if I felt it was taking my time away from my girlfriend.
kylo4
remanance
Posted 9:48 AM 1/9/08
I agree actually.
remanance
Darkest Daze
Posted 9:46 AM 1/9/08
@ArcaneDevice:
It's really weird how it does...I'll never understand it, but I'll also never knock it.
Darkest Daze
ShadowScale
Posted 9:43 AM 1/9/08
1 question what the fuck r u wear
ShadowScale
jello44
Posted 9:42 AM 1/9/08
@Xagest:
I REALLY hope that he lost a bet.
jello44
ArcaneDevice
Posted 9:40 AM 1/9/08
this list only needs two things.
Bejeweled and The Sims.
Works every time.
ArcaneDevice
Erwin
Posted 9:39 AM 1/9/08
I think they forgot part of the "don't force her to play your favourite game." How about don't force her at all? Very few girl I've known play games at all, and usually only once in a while if it's something that catches their eye, like Portal or the Bard's Tale. Trust me, pushing the hobby on her won't be good for anyone. It's best to just ease her in, or just be happy with her, minus a gamer label.
Erwin
KidKardona
Posted 10:17 AM 1/9/08
this has to be one of the most useful things I've found on kotaku
KidKardona
Figcoinc
Posted 10:11 AM 1/9/08
I actually did the "Make Master Chief jump into a pit via her orders" routine. She was cracking up all night long. Well, until I was tired of find interesting ways to commit suicide. haha
Finding a co-op game though is completely on point. I also noticed with women I dated that fighting games work too. The bloodier the better. Even though you are letting her win, if she see that she jacked you up in the process she is happy.
One girl I dated actually found out she was pretty good at Mortal Kombat while doing that. She could beat people legitimately in a month.
Figcoinc
sarcasmOD
Posted 10:11 AM 1/9/08
@ShadowScale: I'm going to assume you think that is a picture of the editor AJ Glasser, because otherwise your comment makes no sense. First of all, that's a guy dressed up as princess peach (obvi) and AJ is a girl gamer, so I'm pretty sure that's not her.
sarcasmOD
sarcasmOD
Posted 10:08 AM 1/9/08
@gstatty: "i don't want to hear about relationship woes while i am having an awesome time" Thats your problem right there. If your gf has a problem with the relationship, you need to listen up immediately, otherwise you are on the train to fap-it town.
sarcasmOD
ggodo
Posted 10:07 AM 1/9/08
My GF is the best damned sniper I've seen. Apparently an old old computer of hers had a Delta Force demo on it.we make a pretty good team, me guarding her blind spots while she gets cross map head shots. I'll never know how she got that good.
ggodo
gstatty
Posted 10:03 AM 1/9/08
thats the best advice i've ever heard, its probably part of the biggest rift in my relationship, my gf.hates.games, she liked patapon, but only watching me play it, i don't think she'd like an fps, maybe an rpg, but seriously, its enough to stretch my relationship to its limits, i think i am through with hearing "you don't want to spend time with me," i'm battling six people at a time, trying to keep up my hp with curaga as well as cast several spells at a time and slicing with my sword in between, i don't want to hear about relationship woes while i am having an awesome time, but i'll try these tips, and i hope that you post more of them
gstatty
SensAzn
Posted 10:41 AM 1/9/08
@the_answer: Well folks, the_answer has the answer! (sorry, I had too)
On a more serious note, differences in a relationship can be good too. If you do everything together you'll just get sick of each other. Opposites attract!
SensAzn
Onizuka-GTO
Posted 10:40 AM 1/9/08
@KidKardona: don't you mean the "only" useful thing?
;)
Onizuka-GTO
Spoony Bard
Posted 10:38 AM 1/9/08
great article. Not using Kotaku connections...respect.
Spoony Bard
Cornerb0y
Posted 10:33 AM 1/9/08
I love my girlfriend very much. She is a hardcore gamer! She KILLS me in some Street Fighter, and doesn't button mash. Its fantastic! We are really into the same games. No Halo for us, just some fighters! Ohh and Wolfenstien 3d as well!
Cornerb0y
the_answer
Posted 10:27 AM 1/9/08
my girlfriend hates videogames. videogames are for little kids, she said. it takes too much time that should have been used for more productivity things, she complained. for her, videogame is the enemy.
and i respect that. i accept that she will never have the passion for gaming that i have. i don't even bother plotting schemes to make her like videogames. i don't need her to change. if ever she gets to like videogames, it is all up to her.
the good thing is that she also respects and understands my love for gaming.
the_answer
Greenstuff-Alex
Posted 10:27 AM 1/9/08
That's the most attractive princess i've ever seen. It kinda looks like the Scout, trying to be a Spy.
<3
Greenstuff-Alex
roscoe
Posted 10:27 AM 1/9/08
@kylo4:
awwwwwwww.
roscoe
Engel
Posted 10:52 AM 1/9/08
or: How to become a pussy and allow a woman to ruin yet another pleasure in your miserable existence.
Engel
Shockadin
Posted 10:52 AM 1/9/08
*Jots down notes*
Shockadin
TeamSakuraKC
Posted 10:51 AM 1/9/08
Geez... it felt like they were pushing people to join GamerChicks pretty hard. o_O
I personally have no interest in joining a female gamer group, but it could be because I've been gaming for about 20 years now. Back when I started gaming, female gamer groups didn't exist. You were just a gamer. I don't really see why you need to join one just to feel comfortable with gaming, which is how the answers pushing GamerChicks felt like they were saying some women should do.
TeamSakuraKC
Naaloq
Posted 10:45 AM 1/9/08
The problem here is obviously going over your head. Even after the panel, you still have the same mindset you went into it with: that gamer girls only want to play easy games, casual games, or kids games.
What makes you think its okay to tell someone "no, I can't go out tonight, I'm in the middle of a raid", and then belittle them for being upset by it? How would you feel if she was playing a really boring and pointless game and you wanted to go do something, and she tells you that the boring, pointless game has become more important that your plans with her?
I have a gamer girlfriend and she can kick my ass at any fighting game and at console shooters, but she still plays some casual games like the sims. She has just as broad a gaming library as any male gamer that has enough balls to have anything but halo on their shelf.
And no, im not dating her just because shes a gamer girl, like half of you "you dont play games, so youre not worthy of me" asses out there.
tl;dr :: ive never met an adult female thats wanted to play a barbie game, they were designed for preteens. no one else plays them. saying 'im in a raid' makes you the asshole, not them. youll never have a girlfriend, enjoy your buttsecks.
still tl;dr :: buttsecks.
Naaloq
mhlaxp
Posted 11:21 AM 1/9/08
Wow, thanks for the Transcript. Fascinating and informative read, I'll have to get to PAX one of these years.
Also I laughed at the Bort story.
mhlaxp
Fishballs
Posted 11:15 AM 1/9/08
I got lucky. My lady understands why I'm so enthusiastic about gaming (it's mostly an art thing) and she gives them a try once in a while.
What got her interested was mostly me discussing them with her in terms of being a piece of art/ entertainment like a television show or movie, hence putting it in terms that she gets as a writer (she's a journalist).
Just take the time out to talk about them a little.
Fishballs
teeuwen
Posted 11:06 AM 1/9/08
@Engel:
yeah lifes a b&*ch and then you marry one :P
teeuwen
bialia
Posted 11:43 AM 1/9/08
@Engel: it sounds like you need some cock.
don't blame that on the ladies.
bialia
theherlihyboy
Posted 11:42 AM 1/9/08
The one piece of advice I'm taking away from reading the transcript of this panel is the only one they didn't give - that the last thing any guy should do is listen to one fucking thing the panel said.
theherlihyboy
maraxusofk
Posted 11:29 AM 1/9/08
great picture followd by a great story. however, nothing can top that picture. u undid urself aj.
maraxusofk
gspencer
Posted 10:25 AM 1/9/08
Wow, that's kind of a condescending article. First of all, "I'm in the middle of a raid" is never a good excuse to spoil plans. It doesn't make your girlfriend crabby. Whether she's a gamer or not.
Second of all, the whole girls not being into games is so very old. There are just as many girl gamers out there as there are guy gamers. Not to mention the fact that I know several men who don't even play video games."
i may not even post because i know i'll get flamed for being blunt
I don't care whether this article was written by men or women. Being a girl gamer myself, I gotta agree that Barbie games are made for kids, not women. Just as I'm sure non of you guys still want to play anything involving Bob the Builder.
gspencer
gspencer
Posted 10:19 AM 1/9/08
Wow, that's kind of a condescending article. First of all, "I'm in the middle of a raid" is never a good excuse to spoil plans. It doesn't make your girlfriend crabby. Whether she's a gamer or not.
Second of all, the whole girls not being into games is so very old. There are just as many girl gamers out there as there are guy gamers. Not to mention the fact that I know several men who don't even play video games.
I don't care whether this article was written by men or women. Being a girl gamer myself, I gotta agree that Barbie games are made for kids, not women. Just as I'm sure none of you guys still want to play anything involving Bob the Builder.
gspencer
Thorax
Posted 12:01 PM 1/9/08
"Guy: She's also scared of the controller being so big…"
I...I just can't do it. It's way too easy. I have to be str-
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!!!
....
....
....
....
I'm a whore.
Thorax
Rev
Posted 12:00 PM 1/9/08
luckily my boyfriend and I don't have much issue when it comes to the gaming thing, hell I play more games than he does. We're pretty evenly matched and make a great team in tournaments so we're lucky.
Unfortunately, not all girls are going to get into games, just like not all guys get into sports.
Most girls can associate with one type of game or another, but you can't expect them to get into EVERY game. I can't stand JRPGs or RTSs and I don't think my boyfriend will ever really get that heavily into shooters even though he's good at them. You just need to treat the gaming thing like any other hobby: Not everyone will be as into it as you are.
The best way to ease girls into gaming is honestly to not be an ass-bag about it. It's been mentioned before but it's true. No one wants to do something that turns someone into a flamming asshole. Games or not. Angry soccer coaches ruin soccer and douche boyfriends ruin games.
Rev
Bernoulli
Posted 11:49 AM 1/9/08
@Engel:
Bernoulli
GodKiller0
Posted 11:49 AM 1/9/08
@Engel:
lol, I understand your point, but I just say no to those types of girls.
I prefer a girl to at least understand why I enjoy gaming, if she wants to play cool. Casual fun games where you can both interact and have fun. I think it's better then going to see a movie to know someone, it's more of a "couple" quality time.
I usually enjoy to take interest in things my girlfriend likes, I like a lot of things in life, I just try to see em in an interesting way and never force myself to dislike something just because it's "girl stuff".
I'm also pretty good in faking that I'm loosing to a girl, I let them win sometimes, but I prefer waiting at the last possible moment that I still have a chance to make it and then magically win lol
GodKiller0
Shrinkydinks
Posted 12:14 PM 1/9/08
I have to agree that chicks have problems sometimes with playing stuff online because of the trash talking. I played Counter strike with my boyfriend once and was so nervous about doing something stupid and making my team lose I just completely closed up. My aim is REALLY bad and it makes me feel like I fail at life.
Basically I would say, if your girlfriend shows some amount of interest just try to expose her to more games, figure out what she likes. I don't have a problem with them saying if your girl wants to play Barbie games let her. I've played them before they're not that awful. At least she's playing something, use it as a bridge.
If your girlfriend likes music get her to play some rock band. I don't know anyone who doesn't like to play some RB. If she asks you to play a game one day don't make a HUGE deal out of it, and if you do, make it REALLY positive. I picked up CoD4 and started playing it at my boyfriends house just because I wanted to see what he'd say when I did. I ended up playing through the game and I love it, I'm just too broke to buy my own copy.
In the end if she's not interested, she's just not. Maybe she'll come around eventually but don't be a dick about it. Plus if you play games a lot and ignore your GF she's going to hate them just for spite, trust me I know.
Also "I'm in a raid" is never a valid excuse for anything.
Shrinkydinks
Rev
Posted 12:05 PM 1/9/08
@Engel: If you mean making compromises to make a relationship work then yes you need to be a pussy so you can GET some pussy.
Not only that but if you don't have the nuts to stand up to someone that's making give up everything you enjoy you might as well stick them balls in a jar on top of your dresser because you certainly aren't using them.
tl;dr: Dont' worry you'll understand someday when you get a girlfriend
Rev
SwimOdin
Posted 12:04 PM 1/9/08
I have an alternate strategy:
Step One: Animal Crossing
SwimOdin
Kuroomu
Posted 12:44 PM 1/9/08
As long as my girl doesn't view my use of video games as a negative things, than I could care less about her involvement- which her involvement certainly wouldn't be a bad thing, but a happy mutual standing is certainly nothing to complain about.
Kuroomu
Soriya
Posted 12:35 PM 1/9/08
@Shrinkydinks: Really? I find the it isn't the trash talking that bothers me. For me, its just because I'm there and because I'm a girl that they NEED to talk to me. If that makes sense. Like, when I played Halo 3 online with my husband and I just comment on something, guys would be like, "OMG! A girl is in here, HEY ARE YOU SINGLE! ARE YOU HOT STUFF!" and it just makes me mute every single one of them. If they would just talk to me normally I would be fine by that. But they feel the need to try and flirt with me just cause I'm a girl playing a game like Halo 3 or Gears of War online. If guys would just be normal around me I wouldn't get so frustrated with playing online.
Soriya
Cultivar
Posted 12:53 PM 1/9/08
This is a problem?
You don't shop and try cosmetics; she doesn't play videogames. That's a very fair deal for most people.
Turns out some guys are into role reversal.
Cultivar
joeloliol
Posted 12:52 PM 1/9/08
get your girlfriend to play pixeljunk monsters with you. i hear thats a fun game for couples to play.
joeloliol
roguemarvel
Posted 12:52 PM 1/9/08
I agree with not forcing your favorite game on her rule. I've been gaming for over 15 years and I play games from all over th spectrum, but I hate i when my boyfrind just bothers me over and over to try a game. I don' know why, it just do. And I'm raiding or in th middle of a online multiplayer match is a terrible excuess. I understand he excuess as a gamer but I still hate it.
Just have to learn to balance your time with games and your other half, regardless of there stance on games.
roguemarvel
lucasreis
Posted 1:07 PM 1/9/08
Thank god my girlfriend was already a gamer way before I met her. My mother in law plays games, and even my girlfriend´s grandfather, an 84 year old man, is a huge Sonic fan (from the Genesis era).
The interesting thing is that she is big into games like GTA, Manhunt, Halo and Mortal Kombat but she also loves Mario Kart, Cooking Mama and Viva Piñata. I´m very lucky. Today she even made a suggestion for us to make a Gaming Room on our house when we get married. I´m in heaven, I guess! :D
lucasreis
FreakyFavabean
Posted 1:06 PM 1/9/08
"if she tells you to make Master Chief jump to his death, just do it - it'll be fun for her and get her one step closer to trying it herself. (That's my own personal rule.)"
umm... by "it" do you mean Halo or jumping to her death?
I hope you mean Halo.
FreakyFavabean
Tribal
Posted 1:41 PM 1/9/08
I actually prefer the girls I date not to be gamers. I do more than just play videogames and between working in a game store, my friends group (who are at least 50% gamers) and my degree (software engineering) the last thing I want to do is play street fighter with my girl when I could be going out somewhere and doing something else.
Games are great and all, but they shouldn't be your life.
Tribal
King Seafoam
Posted 1:34 PM 1/9/08
Success Story from myself: I always get together and play games with my girlfriend. Our favorite is Rock Band, especially when we've got a whole group to play with. She always insists on playing guitar but still a little rusty and needs saving now and then. However, she loves it so much she bought GHII for the PS2 to practice when shes away. She learned that GH is in fact harder than RB, but managed to beat Hard mode and move on to Expert. Now she's getting a little cocky and kicking me off the drumset to play on Medium difficulty..... I'm so proud... =')
King Seafoam
antimony
Posted 1:32 PM 1/9/08
From the other side of the aisle: ladies, the way to get your non-gamer boyfriend to let you monopolize the TV:
1. Play things with pretty graphics. For some reason, non-gamers object to early attempts at polygons.
2. Pick things with lots of cutscenes and point out that it's a lot like watching a movie, which is what he would be doing instead.
3. Smile and nod when he says that Shion and KOS-MOS are getting it on off-screen.
4. Accidentally leap to your death in amusing ways if playing an action game, at least when near a respawn point.
antimony
Rev
Posted 2:04 PM 1/9/08
@Cultivar:
Comparing playing games to buying cosmetics just makes the rift between guys and girls bigger and the reason a lot of girls don't even bother to try a 'guys' thing.
Rev
Rev
Posted 2:02 PM 1/9/08
@Soriya:
Oh do I ever know what you mean. It's so annoying. It's actually gotten better over the years though to where it's not as bad as it was two years ago. Though I do find my boyfriend being awfully jealous that i have more xbox live friends than he does ;).
Rev
StrikerGold
Posted 2:00 PM 1/9/08
I'm sometimes a bit surprised at which games my fiancee will latch on to and dismiss others I'm sure she'd like. Her current Top 5 are probably:
Soul Calibur 4 (absolutely brutal with Amy and Ivy)
Puzzle Quest
Portal
Lost Winds
Guitar Hero 3
with a nod to Dragon Quest 8 as she loves the music, characters and monsters (Goody Bag!) but not necessarily playing it. I'm trying to get her into Castle Crashers as the original TMNT Arcade game is an old fave of hers.
StrikerGold
Shrinkydinks
Posted 1:59 PM 1/9/08
@Soriya:
Well that was the one time I played CS lol and it was really intimidating. I think I'm willing to try TF2 though, that game looks really fun and the graphics make it a lot less intimidating because it's so bright.
I have the problem with guys being all "OMG a girl" when I play stuff like CoV and WoW, which is part of the reason I stopped playing those. When I play stuff on my 360 online I just don't talk. It's easier that way.
Shrinkydinks
Beximus
Posted 1:57 PM 1/9/08
I'm gonna marry that man!
Beximus
seppukake
Posted 2:21 PM 1/9/08
Another good one is Afrika (if they release it anywhere other than Asia).
My girl doesn't mind watching me play but I wanted to get her to play so I showed her a trailer of Afrika before release. She got super excited about it and bought it on release.
And make sure not to be a back seat driver when the girlfriend/wife is playing video games. Just let them be and explore the world on their own.
seppukake
peAr nectAr
Posted 2:14 PM 1/9/08
@jonathan.: Ooh, a pink controller? You think that's going to help?
peAr nectAr
MR. FAP★FAP!
Posted 2:54 PM 1/9/08
My girlfriend will play games if I kinda shove a controller in her face and make her play, but otherwise, she isn't terribly interested in it if it's not Wii Fit. The only other game she ever really played was Dragon Quest waaaay back when and she was so terrible at it that it scarred her for life.
...poor thing!
So I'd never really play games around her. I'd feel guilty as all Hell if I did. I'm not entirely sure how I'd reconcile those feelings if we ever actually move in together someday.
MR. FAP★FAP!
AllegraStreit
Posted 2:45 PM 1/9/08
I wasn't a COMPLETE jerk about it, but I wouldn't say I was completely successful either. Back when I was dating, we'd play Soul Caliber, Katamari together, and she played Suikoden 1 and 2. My problem is I don't like to "play easy" or hold back on people. I like to honestly do my best, and to give people an honest understanding of their skill. The problem is that's a really sucky way of showing how fun games are.
I think it's important in relationships to understand why the significant other likes the things they do. For us, it's videogames. For them, it could be television, surfing the web, knitting, whatever. I don't expect a significant other to have a desire to play videogames, but I do expect them to understand exactly what it is I see in them.
Having said that, videogames are not my life; I can read books, watch movies, go hiking, take up gardeing, just to say a few things. Games should always be below your higher concerns, like significant other, life goals, that sort of thing.
For what it's worth, even though me and my ex-girlfriend broke up, it was not about videogames. And if she had ever asked me, I'd have quit videogames. Not out of obligation, but an honest desire to make her happy. It may sound really sappy, but it's the truth. Having interests outside of videogames/anime/internet subcultures is my suggestion, both for relationships, and for personal developement.
AllegraStreit
Thassodar
Posted 2:38 PM 1/9/08
This would come in handy...IF I had a girlfriend.
Why am I so alone and I'm so damned good-looking?
/sob
Thassodar
Reikson
Posted 2:31 PM 1/9/08
@Tribal:
Well said.
If your girl begs you to play video games, then it might be time to start sharing your pastime with her.
Otherwise, "relationship 101": spend time WITH her, not playing games by yourself.
Reikson
RosaliePolynices
Posted 2:28 PM 1/9/08
My advice, don't try to get your girlfriend into gaming. If she's decent she'll accept the fact that this is one your hobbies, life goes on. If she's awesome she'll involve herself in gaming and trying to be a part of your interests. And if you are decent you will accept her interests for what they are, if you are awesome you will do everything to make her comfortable with exploring something that she's new to, and if you're smart you'll just find someone who is already interested in video gaming if it means that much to you. Common interests you know, identify what you are looking for in a relationship and get involved with that person instead of trying to change some random woman into something new.
RosaliePolynices
Grive
Posted 3:10 PM 1/9/08
@AllegraStreit: That's why they made such an emphasis on cooperative play. If you get into some co-op, it's possible to compensate for her lack of skill until she becomes better.
Of course, the important part is that if she isn't into it, then that's it. People don't need to share every single hobby to be a good couple. Heck, I'd wager healthier couples are the ones that can have separate interests without conflict.
Grive
Grive
Posted 3:06 PM 1/9/08
@kylo4: That's not necessarily a healthy idea. Of course, having a girlfriend requires compromise, but there's a huge gap between "compromise" and "dropping your hobbies".
It's a bit like going out drinking or watching sports with your friends. Sure, You'll have to stop going every friday and saturday with them, but that doesn't mean you should stop seeing them altogether.
In the case of games, it's just a hobby, and one that your girl might enjoy if she were to drop any misconceptions or stereotypes she might hold. The panel deals with doing so. Who knows, it might become another connection between the two of you. After all, you don't consider gaming to be an inherently valueless activity, otherwise you wouldn't do it at all. It doesn't need to become more involving, time consuming or otherwise absorbing than watching a movie or two on the couch (even with the occasional rainy afternoon marathon).
@peAr nectAr: If she likes pink, why not? It's not sexist if that is her favorite color.
It just so happens that a disproportionate amount of women (compared to men) like the color pink.
Of course, if she hates the color, then you're not going to help.
Grive
Soriya
Posted 3:03 PM 1/9/08
@Rev: Oh its definitely gotten better over the years. Ya, I noticed that I got more friends on my list when I first started going online with my 360 too and wasn't sure if I should attribute that to me being a girl or how good I am. :/
Soriya
Soriya
Posted 2:57 PM 1/9/08
@Shrinkydinks: Ditto, thats what I do too. Its kinda sad though. With games like Shadowrun, its only an online game so if you're trying to let the other teammates know that someones coming with the flag, you kind of have to talk and in doing so bring trouble to yourself. And if I have to talk, and they ask if I'm either a girl or a little kid, I would rather say I'm a little kid to not be hassled. :(
Soriya
GodelEscherBach
Posted 3:22 PM 1/9/08
Great post.
...but you are not me. Sounds like my convention was very different from yours.
GodelEscherBach
jp182
Posted 3:42 PM 1/9/08
anecdote: the best part about reading this article is that while I was reading it, my girlfriend pushed me out of my chair so she could check out a FAQ on Phoenix Wright while muttering to herself.
jp182
YamiNoSenshi
Posted 3:41 PM 1/9/08
Two words: Harvest Moon. Such a great gateway game. It's very simple at first, and only gets a little more complicated very gradually. There's very little objective pressure. Also, you're assuming a role that's easy to understand. Everyone knows, in some way, how to grow vegetables. So your girl isn't thrown into an unfamiliar circumstance.
Because they lack what I call a "gamer sense". After you've played games for so long, you get used to the way things work. Given a situation, you can normally understand what to do. After long enough, it becomes second nature and you don't even think about it anymore. But somebody coming into gaming fresh, no matter how intelligent, doesn't have an understanding of these norms. So it's important to start with games that don't have them.
YamiNoSenshi
Marlor
Posted 4:23 PM 1/9/08
Quote: "2) Play co-op, not competitive. Some girls are unnerved by 13-year-old trash-talkers."
That should be: "Everybody is unnerved by 13-year-old trash-talkers".
Marlor
Lunaros
Posted 5:35 PM 1/9/08
What about us girls who are already serious gamers? ;3; We do exist, too~ XP
Lunaros
akanekun
Posted 5:27 PM 1/9/08
Unfortunately, all those tips completely don't work on a guy that's not into gaming. The only time he'll play with me is if I tell him enough times that I'll kick his ass in some fighting arcade game.
What's really sad is he's a concept artist in the industry, and I have to play games for him so he can watch and understand the story, graphics and gameplay for the games his company makes.
But as mentioned above, it's something you just live with and respect. Would rather have someone who works hard and doesn't game that much than a guy who burns his life away raiding nonstop.
akanekun
CyberSkull
Posted 5:23 PM 1/9/08
It basically breaks down to: Give them a game that is non-threatening tailored to their interests.
CyberSkull
MelodyKitn
Posted 6:04 PM 1/9/08
This was a much better answer panel than the last girl-centric one. But what's up with all the gamerchicks advertising?
My guy should thank his brother-in-law (my elder bro)... his fault that the shiny gadgets intrigued me so...
Anyhoo, those were some good tips, but in the end, it is a give, take, and appreciate situation.
If you give her the games, she takes it in, appreciate her for taking part in something you love. If she gives you the game back, take some satisfaction that she tried to get involved, and she'll appreciate you for understanding if it's not her thing.
MelodyKitn
SansSanity
Posted 6:18 PM 1/9/08
@Calicomarie: Totally agreed.
I did something similar. I travel alot, so I leave my consoles with my girlfriend when I travel. She started trying games in my absence (used to feel awkward with me around as I backseat too much). So I bought her a 360 as well for some online play ... up until she started kicking my arse online
Now we stick to co-op play :)
SansSanity
GimmeCat
Posted 8:02 PM 1/9/08
mym mum has been playing puzzle fighter since the ps1 era. now she owns random online ppl at PSN version and gets very addictive about it. Although she doesnt know how to boot the game kepe yelling at me like "come here and find me more victims!!!" lol
GimmeCat
noboard
Posted 8:28 PM 1/9/08
Sorry if this one's already been mentioned, but Spore creature creator is a winner. My wife loves it and she was moaning like hell when I was trying to get it running on my laptop instead of paying her attention.
Can't wait for the full game to come out.
Oh and fully agree with letting her get on with it. She often waits for me to comment on what she's up to and then relaxes and enjoys the game once she's sure I wont say anything.
noboard
Ajh
Posted 9:10 PM 1/9/08
@Marlor: Or Everyone wishes they'd get a new vocabulary and the hell off their competitive games. Noob this noob that. It's really bad when you want to throw a TEAMMATE in WoW's Battlegrounds to the enemy. I don't think that has to do with me being a woman at all.
Ajh
leonardozimbres
Posted 9:39 PM 1/9/08
Excellent article.
leonardozimbres
Noble-Asthmatic
Posted 10:54 PM 1/9/08
The one thing that drives me away from games is when HE backseat games ME and tells me everything I'm doing wrong. "Why did you do that?" Is a common phrase during my play and I've just about had it. Yes, yes I died on purpose. Oh lord, I went the wrong way on a map I've never played before. JUST to spite you. Let me have my own learning experience, pal, and if I need your help, I'll ask for it.
Noble-Asthmatic
Ajh
Posted 11:40 PM 1/9/08
@DocRimbo: My sister adores 1 on 1 competition. She's on halo on xbox live and all that. I tend to enjoy team competition. I like working together with people but also like smashing other people at the same time. And most of the girls I know around here WILL go head to head on rock band. Mostly all these tips depend on the woman you're with. If you don't know her you'll never get her into games.
Ajh
DocRimbo
Posted 11:24 PM 1/9/08
Tip #2 reminds me of a psychological study I heard about a few years ago. The thesis was that girls, by nature, are communal-comparative, while guys are competitive. They videotaped kids on the playground, and the boys were trying to one-up each other ("I can throw this ball over the school," "I can throw it to the MOON!") and the girls were comparing life-notes ("Your dad is a fireman? MINE TOO!") -- even when it wasn't true.
Point being, we can't make character judgments on our female counterparts because they don't want to go head-to-head on Rock Band - it might be in their genes. Just do a World Tour . . . of love.
DocRimbo
Gloibin
Posted 12:00 AM 2/9/08
What a long fucking article for something so simple.
1. Get DS and Elite Beat Agents.
2. Lock her in room.
Gloibin
onikuwagata
Posted 2:04 AM 2/9/08
@Cultivar: Does that mean that if I shop and try out cosmetics, that it would be fair if she started playing video games?
Jokes aside, as long as neither of you are selfish jerks, really, there shouldn't be a problem. Period. You can't value a chunk of plastic and circuits over people. And she shouldn't be so needy and jealous as to feel that anything that takes attention away from her is a threat. If either is the case: SEVER. It's for the best. I don't care if she plays or not. That's not the important thing in a relationship. The important thing in the relationship should be the relationship, right?
onikuwagata
Miharu
Posted 2:47 AM 2/9/08
That costume is so great, I've seen that guy cosplay Peach before but again he does it for the lulz as in "lol it's a guy in peach costume". He could do so much better with makeup and a wig. That would seriously gain him more respect than a baseball cap.
Miharu
cokpendejo
Posted 11:57 AM 2/9/08
Nothing works for me. Period. I have tried it all. Besides, it's important in a relationship to have some things that are just for you. Its important to still be able to maintain your separate identity.
cokpendejo
JohnnyLA
Posted 2:17 PM 2/9/08
WAY too much energy and bending backwards involved in this whole "conversion" thing. Nip it in the bud at the beginning.
I used to work in the Midwest and my friends and I found it extremely difficult to date any women who weren't totally "gamist". This is especially true if I told my profession (video game artist) and you see their eyes either 1) glaze over, 2) widen in fright or 3) roll back in their heads thinking you are a man-child.
Eventually my criteria was that if I get any of those reactions I would be "anti-gamist" and not even consider them dating potential. I didn't care if they were PhD's, had the heart of Mother Teresa, and looked like goddess's.
I look around now and I see that the majority of my co-workers and friends date within the game industry or in other ethnic groups that are WAY more into technology and tolerant of the gaming lifestyle (I can count on one hand my friends/co-workers dating/married to Caucasian women here in So. Cal. compared to the other groups.)
I say that since it's such an integral part of your life and personality don't settle for less. I see the younger generations of woman growing up and it becoming much less of a stigma so that's a plus and I agree with the "Time" comment.
JohnnyLA
MellowJade
Posted 4:30 PM 2/9/08
You know it's really simple to get girls into gaming. Like my brother just gave me a gameboy and years later as a adult I still love them
My boyfriend is into video games, but it's really hard to get him into "good" games.
MellowJade
PMS Kitty
Posted 4:48 PM 2/9/08
If someone could pass along to the editors of the site that it's spelt GamerchiX, I'd really appreciate it. Pet peeve.
Great job to all the Panelists!
PMS Kitty
Amiash Day One
Posted 7:32 PM 2/9/08
this will be a big help a lot of man-struggling-how-can-i-let-her-play-games-Gamers. (obviously).
Amiash Day One
Gameinatrix
Posted 12:15 AM 3/9/08
First let me say, I saw you in that dress the first day and you looked HOT, all men should look that good in a dress.
Thanks for transcribing our panel, however...I said SALON, not laundromat. What kind of gaming Diva would I be if I did my own laundry, SHEESH!
Gameinatrix
Yumayah
Posted 5:10 AM 3/9/08
My boyfriend only plays fighting games. But recently he borrowed my psp for echochrome. I love him and all but I don't know what games we can play together =(?
Last we played together was katamari damacy. We've both got ps2s and DS's..
@_@
Yumayah
SavidDaunders
Posted 3:25 AM 4/9/08
I've got a solution: get a new girlfriend.
SavidDaunders
NeoStarr
Posted 5:13 AM 6/9/08
I met that guy in the picture. He was awesome. Traded him a bunch of DTS pins for my GBA SP.
NeoStarr