In Real Life

Meet The Heavy

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Meet the Heavy and ignore for a minute his massive weight loss. Listen to his monologue about his gun, his wonderful, wonderful to-scale gun.


July 19, 2010
In Real Life

It’s Lunchtime! Let’s Make A Sandvich!

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Technically not a recipe, this is more like cosplay for lunch. And it still doesn’t solve the mystery of what “meat” is actually on Heavy’s health-regenerating treat. But I do like the attention to detail, especially the cheese overhang.


June 25, 2010
In Real Life

Team Fortress 2, By Heavy, Age 5

The mangled syntax and childlike enthusiasm of Team Fortress 2′s Heavy is very much reminiscent of a five-year-old’s view of the world, the obvious inspiration for this crayon drawing about his friends and teammates.


August 20, 2008
Uncategorized

Heavy Gets His Sandvich, I’m Still Waiting

It’s good to know that the Heavy appreciates a good sandwich as much as I do. Though in my case my need for hunger-filling sammiches pushes me to hire interns in the Denver area. In the case of the Heavy? He uses his Sandvich to satisfy overwhelming hunger pangs and heal 120 health. The tidy meal does take him a good four seconds to eat, and apparently the noise of his chomping is a dead give away. Still worth it… hands down.

The Sandvich is the Heavy’s first unlockable. It tastes as good as it looks and heals 120 health. Like in real life, the decision to eat a Sandvich must not be taken lightly; The Heavy is completely vulnerable during the four second eating process, and his loud, happy sounds of vigorous chewing will draw enemies like tiny ant cowards to a picnic. OF DEATH. On the bright side, the Heavy’s Sandvich supply is unlimited, so his only real concern is being caught short while enjoying this delicious edible device. The Sandvich is a great tool for a Heavy defending an area, as it gives him the ability to replenish health between enemy waves without having to abandon his post. Similarly, an offensive Heavy without a Medic can step back from the front line and grab a quick snack before resuming his rampage. Beware, however: the Heavy must set aside his shotgun to take the Sandvich, and enemy Snipers are much more dangerous for a Heavy wielding only a minigun.

Hit the jump to see the Sandvich in action. Be warned, it’s gruesome.


August 18, 2008
Uncategorized

Valve Reveals Heavy Achievement Reqs

Valve’s milking its new “Heavy Update” for all it can give. Last week we told you about the Killing Gloves of Boxing. Well, the new achievements that were unveiled with that unlockable now have their requirements listed. Many of them pun broken Russo-English, and one “Don’t Touch Sandvich” — Kill 10 Scouts with your minigun “Natascha” — gets revenge for Scout punking Heavy in the “Meet the Scout” trailer.

Updated Heavy Achievements [Official Site, thanks reader Bcoolbyte]