We often think: Either director Uwe Boll doesn't get it, or he really, really gets it. Bad flick after bad flick, yet Uwe Boll keeps getting his game-to-film adaptations made. And the man's got loads of opinions about the movie industry, what's wrong with it, and how he can make it better. From Boll's self-penned written rant titled "The Film market — or THERE IS NO MONEY IN MOVIES":

I will stop here before I start writing about totally overpaid agents, managers, agents, and studio executives in L.A. living in airballoons as long they can rip money out of the world outside of L.A. or the major companies. If I would run a studio I would do the same movies for half of the production costs in throwing the cokeheads out and cutting the bullshit of breakfast, lunch, and dinner meetings with idiots who never made a movie in their life. I can shoot a movie like Fantastic Four 2 in half of the time for half of the money shot by shot.

Boll breaks down the problems with the film industry and what he can do to help. (And no, it's not stop making movies. DAMMIT.)

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Uwe Boll must be on cloud nine, maybe even ten or eleven.

Running with Scissors just announced that his Postal film won not one, but two awards at the Hoboken International Film Festival. Boll took home $AU 530 cash money for the best director award, beating out the directors of films like Crazy, Strange Girls, The Sensei and Flyboys. Oh, snap! Boll beat out D. Lee Inosanto!!!

Postal also was named the best of the festival despite showings of The Noogies, In The Eyes of a Killer, Predator's Return and The Pack.

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Approximately 200 theatergoers walked out of a free Postal screening in New Jersey last Friday. While Hoboken Mayor David Roberts refused to attend the screening, stated that he did not like the film's 9/11-style attack gag and added that it was "too soon to mock a plane going into the World Trade Center." According to Boll:

Being politically correct, let's say, the big studios are kind of overdoing it... I feel it is time now to make a really wild movie, something over the top... We don't spare any group. We don't want to hurt anybody but we want to break the rules... We want to make people think: What is a taboo? We want to make people start thinking about their own boundaries and rules.

It's kind of curious of Mayor Roberts to say it's "too soon to mock a plane going into the World Trade Center". Does that mean eventually it will be okay to mock that? And if so, who will decide that? Rather subjective, no?

Postal Offends Some [NJ.com via Binge Gamer] [Pic]

Oh! Uwe Boll's movie adaptation of Postal came out this weekend and we totally forgot about it. That might have something to do with the fact that it opened on thirteen screens. That's obviously small potatoes but far, far better than the four screens it was reported to bow on previously. Variety's The Cut Scene looked into Postal's opening weekend—it went up against Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull which did $US 126 million—and found out that the movie raked in... well, they have no idea. Yes, that's weird. Not screening for critics is one thing, but keeping hush hush on your take is something else.

Postal's Box Office mystery [The Cut Scene]

Interview with Uwe Boll [LoadingReadyRun Thanks everyone for sending this in!]

Statistically speaking, the chance of you catching Uwe Boll's Postal in the theatre is extremely low, and now that we are all feeling either saddened or mildly bemused at his plight with the film adaptation of Running With Scissors' over-the-top game franchise I'm sure we're itching to catch the film when it hits retail outlets. We'll have our chance on August 26th, the day newbie blu-ray publisher UMVD Visual Entertainment has slated for the high-definition release. High-Def Digest has an interesting description for the release in their announcement post.

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You have to feel a bit bad for Uwe Boll at this point. Granted he's made some terrible movies, but he didn't deserve to have his big Postal movie that he was all excited about limited to only four movie screens across the entire country. On the movie's official website, Boll takes a moment to vent about websites that are claiming this setback as a triumph against him.

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Uwe Boll's Postal is getting a limited release. A very, very limited release. Make that very, very, very limited. Four theatres, actually. Says Boll via press release:

Theatrical distributors are boycotting Postal because of its political content. We were prepared to open on 1500 screens all across America on May 23rd. Any multiplex in the U.S. should have space for us, but they're afraid... We have even tried to buy a few screens in New York and Los Angeles, and they won't let us even rent the theatres! I urge independent exhibitors to contact us and book 'Postal'! Audiences have been expecting the film and I don't think exhibitors should censor what gets played in U.S. theatres.

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It just won't stop. And you can be damn sure Uwe Boll will do everything he can to make sure it doesn't. That's right, we're back for another round of Boll vs. Bay in which crappy low budget director Uwe Boll and crappy big budget director Michael Bay butt heads! Boll said in an exclusive video:

Hi here's Uwe Boll, I'm very happy to say the fight is on. Boll Vs. Bay. It's a rumble in the jungle 2, it will be in Kinshasa, Zaire. I think September 30th will be the fight. Boll against Bay. He agreed to do it, I'm very proud of it. So if you want to be live there you need ten tickets from Postal opening May 23rd. You bring these tickets and this will be the entry to the boxing fight, Boll against Bay. Or you can buy tickets on eBay or wherever else you can buy it, of course also, but I think the cheapest way is with the Postal tickets. OK, so Michael Bay, start training and I think you will go down to be honest. I think round three or round four you will go down in history, not only for the worst war movie ever: Pearl Harbor, no, also for the worst boxer in the ring against Uwe Boll ever. Thank you.

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Uwe Boll sure as shit knows how to promote a movie. (Bummer he doesn't know how to make a movie.) With Postal coming out May 23, he's already got a 200,000 signature strong internet petition to get him to stop direction. Think Boll will stop directing? Never! About that petition, Boll says:

I tracked down who's signing that petition, and these are like a few people, getting under different identities and things in the internet and signing it over and over again. The second thing is that I was able to find that actually Michael Bay and Steven Spielberg under various different identities posting ongoing that I should stop making movies, and I know why: They are afraid of the competition. What jealous internet nerds and wannabe filmmakers are signing that petition?

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