Toad was supposed to be Mario’s friend, right? Then why doesn’t he just give Mario what he needs instead of making him play his twisted games?
I swear I’m gonna murder Toad. I hate everything about him — his stupid smurfy hat, his dumb little smile, his goofy, perky body language. I despise his goddam Marge Simpson voice, and the way he yells “Rabo!” But most of all, I hate the way the little fucker keeps nailing me with blue shells in Mario Kart 7 and snatching my lead away.
That “on crack” bit isn’t me being rude. That’s what the guy who made these figures said – that they look like they’re on crack.
Brentalfloss is back at it again, discovering clues to Toad’s sexual orientation in the lyrics to the Super Mario Bros. 2. Or at least the ones he made up for it.
Blah blah blah, thank you Mario, another castle, etc. … But magnify the sprite and we see the rancorous contempt Toad has had for us for more than a quarter-century.
