You know what's missing with Wii Fit? Nope. It's maids! That's right, maids. Over in Akihabara's Refresh Club, folks can play Wii Fit with maids in frilly dresses. Like most things, Wii Fit maid style comes at a price: 30 minutes will run you ¥2,600. Says the establishment's owner:

Playing Wii Fit by yourself is lonely. But here, playing along with a maid makes exercising enjoyable.

That's a good point, and we're now slightly shocked Nintendo didn't bundle the game with maids. If Wii Fit is not your thing, Refresh Club runs other services like ear cleaning, foot massages and yoga — make that, maid yoga.

Refresh Club [Candy Fruit via Akiba Keizai via alafista]

While I'm still excited when my hotel room has one of those crappy, wired directly to the TV N64 controllers, more upscale establishments require more upscale entertainment. Marriott and Nintendo have joined forces to provide visitors at select locations the total Wii experience in the comfort of their own hotel room without that hassle of juggling game discs about. A custom version of the system has been devised specially for the hotel giant, featuring a self-contained Wii unit with 20 different games built-in, including Wii Fit, Super Mario Galaxy, and of course, Wii Sports.

The special units being tested at six Marriott and Renaissance locations in Maryland and New York, where guests can book online with the promo code XY0 in order to secure a room with a Wii for a small premium fee. Not my cup of tea, but then when I stay in a hotel I'm generally spending all day around games and just want to snore for a few hours before doing it all over again. Hit the jump for the list of participating locations.

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And no, it's not the new DS. We're expecting confirmation of that later in the week. This, though, this is something a little different, a little smaller, a lot less interesting. Spotted by GAF user Shiggy on OAMI (the pan-European trademark registry), this is an official Nintendo...pedometer. No doubt for use with Wii Fit - or maybe even Wii Fit 2 - since with no external display, it'll obviously be transmitting the data to the Wii. So, an official, branded, Nintendo pedometer! Exciting times we live in, no?

Nintendo Pedometer [OAMI, via NeoGAF]

You may remember that the star of NBC's The Biggest Loser, Jillian Michaels, issued an ultimatum to gamers earlier this year. With Majesco's Jillian Michaels' Fitness Ultimatum 2009 the fitness guru has given you two options: whip your sorry arse into shape or, you know, don't. It's up to you. After seeing Ms. Michaels' gloriously toned midriff, however, you may be shamed into leaning toward "whip arse into shape," even if the graphics look clunky as hell and monkeybar climbing with a Wii-remote looks decidedly lame. Still, the debut trailer for the game is worth it for the camera's attention on Jillian's ab-region. We don't mind being pandered to.

Jillian Michaels' Fitness Ultimatum 2009 [GameTrailers]

Alright, well, if Wii Fit wasn't badass enough for you, now you can sign up to have your arse kicked by Jillian Michaels, whose "Fitness Ultimatum" for Wii (out next year) apparently involves an invisible Wiimote and a completely unforeseen monkey-bars peripheral. Graphics look a little clunky, but if you're dripping as much sweat as this thing promises, you probably won't care. But then, if you buy this thing, your priorities are probably way different from a standard gamer's.

Jillian Michaels Fitness Ultimatum 2009 Wii Trailer [YouTube, via Nintendo Wii Fanboy]

Alright! Who wants to see a dude with his pants down around his ankles hula-hooping on Wii Fit?! Wow, you guys are gonna tear your rotator cuffs waving your arms like that. Here's "Gio," the tongue-wagging boyfriend who "secretly" taped Wii Fit Girl Lauren Bernat back in June, creating a YouTube (but not viral marketing, insisted Nintendo) sensation. Lauren got revenge a week ago on the Tyra Banks Show, convincing her sweetums to drop trow and rotate his arse on national syndicated TV. You go, girl.

Payback for Wii Fit Girl's Boyfriend [Asylum]

Highlights of a Wii Fit Family Challenge will be airing on Nick at Night next month, Nintendo announced today.

Hosted by Olympic skating champion Kristi Yamaguchi, the challenge had three families competing in a series of aerobic, yoga, strength training and balance activities using the balance board and Wii Fit. Finalists in the challenge all won a Wii, copy of Wii Fit and an expense-paid trip to Orlando for the Sept. 17 taping.

The championship's highlights will be airing throughout the night on Oct. 9 between prime time progreamming on Nick at Night. Proof positive that someone in America is still using their Balance Board.

Even though 64% of those who bought Wii Fit have it collecting dust in their closet, the new controls of Skate It using the Wii balance board look, well, promising. In the latest trailer we get another quick look at the Wii version of the game. I'm personally going to take my balance board in my yard and start practicing for this.The neighbours will love it. The game will be hitting the Wii and Nintendo DS this upcoming holiday season.

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US national women's team members Heather Mitts and Heather O'Reilly are two fit athletes. Or so you'd think. Hey, they're in the Olympics! Watch as they compete with each other in Wii Fit mini-games for the chance at winning a Wii. Listen to that irritating announcer. Then scratch your head when Wii Fit says Olympiads' balance ages are 47 and 43 respectively.

Pathetic. Those ladies really need to get in shape. They need to quite that goofing off they do on the women's national team (gold medal — ha, whatever!) and just do Wii Fit all day long. That's the only way these slackers will get fit.

If you have lots of free time today, there's another clip after the jump. It has the hula hoop game.

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And not because Shigeru likes to overshare about latent pyromania, internet porn, or armpit farting the William Tell overture. It's because if he did, the industry would collectively say, "A-ha! We now know what Nintendo is making next!" and rush to squat on that IP first. And then their mums would say, "If Shigeru Miyamoto jumped off the Empire State Building, would you?" And when they replied "Yes," it wouldn't be out of spite.

At least, that's the reasoning behind an item in The Times of London. The piece connects some dots -- Miyamoto loves puzzles, Brain Age follows; Miyamoto interested in exercise, Wii Fit is born; Miyamoto takes music lessons, Wii Music unveiled. And the writer, attributing to sources within Nintendo, says the third time was enough and Nintendo has asked Miyamoto to hush up about his interests.

Me, I think Shiggy should lay a bunch of red herrings out there. He should start saying that he likes, I dunno, visiting water pipe bars, researching graves and farming wheat. Then someone would run out and set a survival horror/genealogical research game in Kansas with a motion control bong. And that would be really fun to play. And Nintendo can get the idea out there as a trial balloon without taking any of the risk. Why am I not a consultant?

The Nintendo Gaming World Awaits Another Mario [The Times, thanks readers Mesren_Makai and TJ]