Who Will Win the GTA Hooker Pageant?

Man, I am on a mission to get Jack Thompson to spam my inbox. I figured anything pairing "Grand Theft Auto" and "hookers" might trigger his impotent, wasted bot-army of letter writers which is, of course, himself alone.

GamesRadar has an amusing tribute to one of the most indispensable classes in the GTA franchise, the hooker. I'll have you know — this is written with as serious a face I can muster — I've never killed one. Ever. I consider it a point of pride that I never, even to see the outcome, lowered myself to the top-of-mind stereotype everyone has of a GTA gamer. Nor do I kill the cops. Unless I have 3 stars and have been separated from a burning vehicle. But I digress.

GamesRadar's beauty pageant covers the ladies of the previous three titles, complete with screengrabs and pulled quotes. Funny Bunny is tattooed on my mind from the hours spent combing VIce City for special packages. And for Contestant 10, I mean this in the nicest way, I dated a woman who had a similar hairstyle and I recall both fondly. And fondlingly.

So, here they are, Misses Liberty City, Vice City, Los Santos, Las Venturas, San Fierro, etc. ...

Grand Theft Radar: Hooker Beauty Contest


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