WIN! The Sacred 2 Collectors Edition On Xbox 360

Here's your final chance to win a copy of Sacred 2 on Xbox 360. We also reveal who won the second PS3 collectors edition.

UPDATE: This comp closes at 2pm August 29. The winner will be announced later in the evening.

To recap: on Tuesday and Thursday we had the PS3 collectors edition of Sacred 2 to give away and on Wednesday we gave away one Xbox 360 collectors edition of Sacred 2, thanks to distributor Madman Interactive. Today it’s the final Xbox 360 edition. Make sure you leave your entry in the comments of the correct post!

How do you enter?

RPGs are all about questing, adventure and the life of your character. Your character journal or quest log is the record of that life.

To be in the running to win, I want you to write a journal entry of your quest to win this competition. The most creative, imaginative, funny and/or well-written prose will win. I’m not going to set any word limit on this, but… just don’t go nuts, ok?

Just remember, your journal entry is about your quest to win the competition. We’ve seen some great entries so far that I just couldn’t give the prize to because they were describing some other irrelevant quest.

Leave your entry in the comments between now and 2pm tomorrow when the next post goes up. And good luck!

The PS3 winner for Thursday is “Ryan Norris”, whose unexpected cunning scuppered the impressive efforts of all others. Here it is in full:

Hero Journal, Entry 37

Today after a hard day I retired from the concrete jungle to my favorite watering hole, The Kotaku. They make one mean cup of mead and usually have a few quests up on the notice board.

The master of the watering hole, one Sir Wildgoose seemed to have done just that. ‘Win a copy of Scared 2′ it begun. Eagerly I read the quest to see what beast I had to slay, or how many coins I needed to gather but there was nothing like that. I was very confused. It was something I just couldn’t grasp. I’m a fighter not a thinker Sir Wildgoose.

Maybe mummy was right when she said I should have taken some points in intelligence and wisdom. “Brawn will only get you so far young man” she used to say waging that finger of hers at me.

So how do I win this ‘Scared 2′? I don’t even know what it is yet I know I MUST have it! and I certainly cant work out what this quest is all about so what do I do. Some thinker is bound to come up with the answer and take the prize. Bloody thinkers!

Most thinkers wouldn’t even have half the strength I have….

THAT’S IT! Sir Wildgoose will announce tomorrow here at The Kotaku who the winner is and im sure they will be about to collect there prize, ‘Scared 2′ so I will just wait until they claim it and then as they walk out wait behind that wagon outside and introduce them to my little 2 little friends, slide n dice and see how well their intelligence & wisdom work after I chop their head in 2!

How good is this! I will just sit here and wait. The fire is warm, the mead is strong and the entertainment is the best in town and no need for any thinking at all.

See mummy, you don’t need intelligence and wisdom after all! You would be so proud me.

Signed X


Comments

    Journal,

    Spent most of yesterday grinding in the forest. I went in with the intention of picking a few berries, maybe collecting some firewood, but every time I turned a corner a damned troupe of goblins would leap out and attempt to assault me. At first they irritating me, but within an hour I had mysteriously doubled in strength and acquired a rather powerful magic staff from one of their corpses (why he didn't use it to attack me I'll never know), so by the end it was little more than a rather bland sport for me.

    I returned to my home town of Kotakstone (population approximately 9) and began to prepare for sleep. Tomorrow (which, naturally became today as the sun later broke) was to be the release date of Sacred 2, a game I have been anticipating since the housewife across the street started to discuss it, and nothing else, a few weeks ago. It occurred to me, however, that I was in possession of a measly 14 million gold – the game was bound to cost at least 20 million, thanks to the recent recession. I was aware that The Wildgoose, a traveling bard, was offering up a copy of the game to anyone who could solve a frankly ridiculous riddle he had devised, but my complete lack of a formal education has left me somewhat incapable of even the most basic of word puzzles. In the morning, a plan would need to be devised.

    As I awoke this morning, I became aware of a scuffle outside. It seems as though the local princess (whose choice of residence in a castle next to what is essentially a pauper's village I find somewhat offense, I might add) had been captured by some dreadful man, and was being dragged off just as I left the house. The local swordsmith lay dying on the ground, breathing heavily and desperately trying to contain his innards. A frightful sight! As I approached him, he gurgled a final wish to me – that I should take his sword, follow the evil Dark Lord Havana or whatever his name was, cease his reign of terror and rescue the princess along the way. He handed me his sword – a frightfully dull and small one, I must say, considering his profession – and promptly died. Sword in hand, I looked at the path in front of me and knew what I must do.

    As I sat at home later that night, playing Sacred 2 on my Unspecified Video Game Console, I briefly wondered what would happen to the princess. Of course, sending me after her would have been lunacy – I am almost entirely untrained in sword combat, and can rarely walk more than about 2km before running out of breath. I felt a twinge of guilt as I recalled The Wildgoose's last word as I shoved the sword into his gut (“congratulations”, he gasped – it seems that stabbing him was actually the solution to his ludicrous riddle, when I had merely intended to take the game from his dead body). He had been a fine bard, singing his own songs of events relevant to our specific region (whilst occasionally reciting the rhymes of bards from far-away lands too), but for Sacred 2, it was a fair price.

    Until I must kill again,
    Jickle

      Hero Journal Entry 38,

      Tried to win contest, but post above mine already contains ten times my daily intake of references..

      Several "Classic" videogame references: Check
      Overly Verbose Response: Check
      Direct Mention of Kotaku staffers name: Check

      Someone give this man a prize already! I am off to commit seppuku.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Leetfoot]: LFG Wildgoose Chase!

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: I'll come.

    Leetfoot has invited you to a group. [ACCEPT] [DECLINE]

    ... ...

    You are now in a group.

    [Group][Nworb]: Oh. I don't have the quest.

    [Group][Leetfoot]: Hang on. I share it.

    Leetfoot has attempted to share a quest with you but your quest log is full.

    [Group][Nworb]: My quest log is full. Hang on a sec.

    Abandoned quest Kulling of Kotaku.

    [Group][Nworb]: Okay try now...

    ---- --- ---
    THE WILDGOOSE CHASE!

    RPGs are all about questing, adventure and the life of your character. Your character journal or quest log is the record of that life.

    To be in the running to win, I want you to write a journal entry of your quest to win this competition. The most creative, imaginative, funny and/or well-written prose will win. I’m not going to set any word limit on this, but… just don’t go nuts, ok?

    --- --- ---
    Write a creative journal entry to win a copy of Sacred 2.

    Journal entry written 0/1

    ___ [ACCEPT] [DECLINE] ___

    ... ...

    [1.General - Kotaku][Leetfoot]: Oh shit sorry. Mom calling. I got to go.

    Leetfoot has left the group.

    You are no longer in a group.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: LFG Wildgoose Chase!

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: Can someone tell me where to find the Journal Entry?

    [1.General - Kotaku][Crzyone]: You have to write it.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: Waht? Where is it?

    [1.General - Kotaku][Crzyone]: You don't find it, you have to create it in your inventory.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Iamabadass]: He's an idiot. Let him figure it out himself.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: How do I write it?

    [1.General - Kotaku][Iamabadass]: Noob. Read the effing text.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Crzyone]: Go to your inventory and click on your quill item you should then have created [Journal Entry]

    Nworb has created Journal Entry.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: Awesome. Ty Crzyone!

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: Where do I hand in?

    [1.General - Kotaku][Iamabadass]: Jebus you are [email protected]!

    [1.General - Kotaku][Crzyone]: Hand the quest in to where you picked it up.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: Someone shared quest with me... where to hand in?

    [1.General - Kotaku][Crzyone]: Err... in that case go to Kotaku and look for David Wildgoose.

    [1.General - Kotaku][Nworb]: Okay thanks.

    --- --- ---
    THE WILDGOOSE CHASE!

    Do you have the journal entry for me? You have to be in it to win it you know!

    [COMPLETE] [CANCEL]

    ... ...

    Excellent. I can't guarantee you'll win anything, but we here at Kotaku thank you for your efforts.

    Ho ho ho.
    --- --- ---

    Quest complete The Wildgoose Chase!

    Journal Entry 58,

    After venturing around the country side I spied a small man, mere mouse in stature compared to my own. He had a small tinny voice and as I approached he mumbled "would you like the opportunity to win a grand prize, so grand that If I weren't so small I'd take it for myself". I replied "what be this prize?" and the small and meek little fellow replied "ahh it be a sacred artifact worth 2 of any of the greatest wonders in the world!!".

    This intrigued me quite a bit. "What is your name little one" in which he replied "I'm the Wild Goose"... What a weird name! I took this little fellow up on his offer but he did let this slip, a catch! Theres always a bloody catch. The Wild Goose said that there'd be a lot of competition to battle against to get this prize. I looked at the Wild Goose and reminded him... "I am the God of War and while I may be missing a hand, if this turns out to be a trick you will meet my axe"!!

    It took some time to reach the battle grounds of Kotaku. There were many combatants but only one I saw as a challenge. It had been many a winter since my axe last tasted the blood of battle and it was eager! I dispatched the heads of the first wave of what can only be described as girly men. No challenge. The next I actually built up a lite sweat before I sent their bloodied bodies to the ground. Leaving a warrior know as "X". The Wild Goose Cheered "Ahh there's only one left! Hoorah! That artifact is mine!!". Mine? I think he's mistaken...

    I battled X for hours. We were both bloodied and bruised and no sooner did I strike the final blow, The Wild Goose was off and running with my Prize!! He laughed "Týr you're a fool, as big as you are you will never catch me!!!". He was right, I'm not built for speed but I had the mind of warrior and I had a cunning plan. I yelled out, with all the power my Godly body could summon so to reach my brother in Asgard!!! "THOR MY BROTHER SEND FORTH A CHARGE SO AS TO KILL THE WILD GOOSE SO I MAY CLAIM MY PRIZE!!!" Dark clouds started to brew and The Wild Goose stopped and turned toward me and no sooner did he open his mouth if to utter some sort of apology, a charge of lightning sent forth from the heavens split him in two!! As I looked down upon him artifact clenched in hand, I chopped off his arm and claimed my prize and set forth to the great hall of Valhalla. Odin will be pleased he'd be looking forward to a new game to punish Loki with.

    Signed
    Týr

    He sat down with a groan.

    Three epic adventures to gaming out lets around ye old melbourne and he was still yet to acquire what he had set out to get months before.

    He had travelled to the great castle of EB games faced with hordes of guitar hero playing children totally devoid of any sort of parental supervision and won. His prize a meeting with the fair maiden of the castle.

    "Have thou heard when sacred 2 be released" he mumbled quietly

    "Sacred 2" she replied "thou is many moons away"

    Confused but persistent he exclaimed "but I hear our brothers to the south did receive the box already and are now as we speak opening it and enjoying the wonders within."

    He received nothing but a blank look in return.

    Dejected he exited the castle a shell of his former self.

    Two more journeys such as this he would make over the coming months always hopeful of a different outcome while answers were mildly different each time the result was the same. He would leave disappointed, he was now a shell of his former self.

    Recently rumours have been circulating of a far off town called Kotakuina. Your quest revolves around travelling to this town and securing yourself a copy of this "sacred 2" so you may return our town hero to his former glory and bring peace to the local region once more.

    Day 4 of the Quest for Sacred II:

    I failed. Again. I'm gonna get drunk on cheetoh's and pepsi.

    Summer, Year of the Jackson.

    Dear Journal.
    Today began as the previous dozen. Wandering the city of Kotakucomau looking for heroic ways to earn a crust.

    Most of the Merchants today were engrossed in the ongoing price war between white and black monoliths. Black monolith’s boldy decided to reduce their size and price, and white had counterattacked by adding pigeon messenger support.

    Sat amongst the braying salesman was a man hunched over an empty table, his face obscured by a dark smock. He beckoned me over with a bony finger.

    “Come here sssofari” he hissed, “and tell me a tale.”
    “A tale? Of what” I asked.
    “A tale of ssuch heroissssm, that moves me to part with the preshusss sssacred the sssecond”
    “But such a tale I lack! I have no quest to tell thee of! Who art thou haggered man?”
    “I am The Wildgoossse, return here with a tale of ssucesss two hours after the sun’s highessst point tomorrow”

    With those words dear journal, the Wildgoose disappeared into the shadows, leaving me in the hubbub of the monlolith wars.

    I was confused. How did The Wildgoose know my name? What was the Sacred 2? Why did I desire that which until only recently I had no knowledge of? The more I thought of this, the louder the crowd grew, monolith fans who had already committed to a particular colour had begun yelling incoherently at those aligned with the other. I could not think. The crowd stopped speaking and began yelling the ancient battle cry of the Fanbuoys “STFUGTFOLOLROFL!”

    I clutched my head at the temples, collapsed to my knees and then… I pounced. Landing on the table that so recently The Wildgoose had occupied I raised my arms, as though reaching to embrace the masses, and spoke to the crowd:

    “Sirs! Ladies! Can you not see that all we are doing is distancing ourselves from our neighbour! Are we not all Children of Kotakucomau? The monolith’s are but possessions, with only the subtlest differences between them! Did the mighty Jackson not say ‘ it don’t matter if you’re black or white?’ In this City of all places! A city where we can hide from the masses who look at our love for the monoliths with wry grins. Can we not agree to disagree?”

    And then dear Journal, I must have collapsed, the next thing I remember was waking to the sound of two bells, the sun burning my face.

    Above me stood The Wildgoose.
    “I have no quest to tell you!” I cried “reasoning with the Fanbuoys drained me of all energy, and I have laid here for what must be an entire day!”
    “Are you so sure? Rise Sssofari, and behold Kotakucomau…”
    I looked around the City. All was silent. My vision was blurred. I could see resting figures all around, it seemed as though they were all clutching monoliths.

    “You have ended the monolith war Sssofari…” he hissed “peace has returned.”
    “How so?” I asked, “have they united under the banner of a shared love?”
    “No Sssofari, they are all dead, your recklessss use of the mystic Commonsense destroyed them.”

    With that, he handed me The Sacred 2.

      Dang facebook login. Username's normally sofari. It makes more sense that way... kinda.

    Not sure what the date is. Been stuck in this accursed supply closet for what seems like ages now. Sure, infiltrating Kotaku to reclaim this Sacred II sounded like such a good idea. Admittedly I may have been drunk when I thought of it.

    Day +1
    Almost got rumbled by a pair of janitorial staff. I ambushed them as they came in, but too late! The door closed and locked again before I could free myself of the convulsing remains of the janitors. At least I don't have to eat soap for dinner tonight.

    Day +2
    Overwhelmed with a sense of hopelessness. Started Writing letters on the towel with the blood of the janitors, and started pushing them out under the door in hopes someone will find it and free me, or maybe tell me where the Sacred 2 is.

    Day +3
    Someone replied! I found a neatly written note pushed under the door when I woke up. Says to try again tomorrow. What madness is this? Why couldn't they just open the door and wedge it open or something?

    Day +4
    I sit, alone, helpless and cursing my unfortunate situation. Maybe I can break out! I have much cleaning supplies here. As I plotted, I penned my last letter for now and slipped it under the door...

    Letter:
    Please send prize to Supply Closet down the hall from the broken window facing the car park. Thanks.

      I vote this one. Shibbbyyy

    I woke up today on the wrong side of the bed. The side with floor mounted spikes. That's what you get for selling your soul to the devil and using your house as a BDSM prostitution ring just so you only have to pay half the rent. It pays the bills. What? Don't judge me diary. I will smack you...

    I escaped from the hospital for the 3rd time this week. Those wenches kept trying to hold me back with "We need to close these wounds up or you'll bleed to death!" or some such, but I would hear have none of it. Bleeding is for the weak, and I showed them that by promptly impregnating all the nurses at once whilst simulataneously pimp slapping every doctor in the hospital. They thanked me for showing them what it mean't to be the man by bowing at my feet and letting me bleed all over their hallway. And then I immediately left.

    It was a bad start to the day, but I am a man, and through the fires of hell I shall walk on my quest. You see, I've grown rather fond of this "kotaku." In essence, kotaku is like a pack of "Maltesers," chocolate covered balls that I would like to stick in my mouth over and over again. And this particular quest, this "sacred" quest (they put sacred 2, but I think that's a clerical error, because "sacred 2 quest" sounds silly. Yes, they definitely meant "sacred quest." My sacred quest.) is by far the most tough any man has ever face.

    My quest required me to save a princess. And without boring you with the details; dear diary, I will simply show you the chronology of events as a checklist:
    - See the king (done)
    - Find out the princess has been kidnapped (done)
    - Set off on treacharous journey (done)
    - Find a weakling who will serve as my sidekick (SK) (done)
    - Have obligatory meaningful development of the relationship between main protagonist (me) and SK which turns into a life long friendship. (Honestly, the guy got kinda annoying. So I killed him.)
    - Let the SK save the main protagonist at least once to prove his worth (N/A)
    - Fight the dragon (done)
    - Find out the dragon is your evil halfling (done)
    - Find out the dragon is your evil halfling and also voiced by Sean Connery (Wait... what?)
    - Kill the dragon (Done.. but.. man I kinda wish I read that last point. I mean Sean Effing Connery!? WTF!? The only man manlier than I Sean Mother-flippin Connery. Oh well, he was past his time)
    - Save princess (Done)
    - Have the first kiss with princess (skipped... I'm more into bringing the hurt down on creatures.)
    - Bring the princess back to the king (done)

    Then as you will see, I had the following transcipt with the Kotaku King; who for brevity's sake will be abbreviated to "KT":
    KT: Wait? What? This isn't my daughter?
    Me: What? This is surely your daughter. Look. She bleeds just like you.
    KT: Uh we all bleed the sa-
    Me: SHE IS THE ONE NOW GIMME MONEY AND MANA!
    KT: But She isn't eve-
    Me: DID YOU NOT SEND ME ON A SACRED QUEST TO RESCURE THE PRINCESS!?
    KT: What? Ohhhhh... no dude.. Wooo.. haha... I meant, would you like a copy of "sacred 2?"
    Me:... What?
    KT: Sacred 2... it's the game..?
    Me:... Sacred 2.. the game? You son ova bee. So I didn't have to save the princess?
    KT: No! I don't even have a daughter! Haha
    Me: ... I didn't have to fight the dragon?
    KT: No.
    Me: I didn't have to kill the Sidekick?
    KT: N- What?... I'm not even going to ask, but no.
    Me: ... I didn't have to save anybody?
    KT: Nope
    Me: .. right then.

    So I killed everyone, and took the game. And that is a day in the life of conan the barbarian. The only thing that sucks is I'll have to wait another 54.87 million years for them to make an xbox 360 so I can play Sacred 2. GOD DAMN IT THIS GAME BETTER BE GOOD!

    And that is how I killed everyone and became the first ever power ranger.
    The end
    -Larry.

    *Smacks Diary around some* Don't be backchatting me now ya hear!

    29th Day of Augustus
    The year of our lord, Davenicus Von Goostrum, 1203

    damn...

    damn damn!

    DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN ROSIE O'DONNEL DAMN!!!

    I have already wasted precious time on this quest to obtain sacred 2.
    What was i thinking? I was talking about a finding a g-spot for Feth's sake! Clearly my priorities are not in all that fit a shape...

    I've looked at all of the entries that precede me and despair fills my heart and loins... this cannot be.. it must not be...

    But how can i beat them? This box full of scantilly clad sacredness must be mine!

    An epiphony hit me this morning, however. A gypsy woman passing me on the street, as i strolled to aquire the juice of a cow for my morning ruffage, proclaimed loudly to me "i can see your black soul!!"

    Black soul? I've never even met James Brown!.. although i do admire his work..

    Thats when it hit me.. to defeat my adversaries and obtain what is rightfully mine, i had to "git ghetto on this mo fo"

    i had to rap my journy...

    ahem..

    yo yo,
    no muther fudger gunna give me no spit
    when i pull my shiny muther fudgin kit
    you see james got game, but he all the same
    and nworb the dworb is pullin in lame
    my heart is strick my fear by a post from tyr
    and grouse to me lookin like ganker of the year
    last i see a post by gaz, followed by laz
    and quickly realise i look like a spaz
    ya'll say i look like a boob, got my skillz from youtube
    but at the end of it all you still call me n00b
    this sacred 2, you aint got no clue
    but i be all over this shizzle like a junky to glue

    yeia boiiiii... south east side represent... doin it old school for the sacred crew!

    C=Bomb - OUT!

    Ps. i know now why i was born white...

    29th Angst, Year of the Fail

    Today is a day I should be spending celebrating the completion of my quest. A day when my name is entered into the history books. Surrounded by mead and women, with the game safely in my possession and the figurine posing on my nightstand. Alas, for the second time in my life I have failed to acquire the fabled Sacred 2 Collector’s Edition.

    My last attempt was undone by me failing to understand the rules and dangers of entering the Temple of Kotaku’s competition chamber. I made no such childish mistakes this time. However, I was bested by the treasures guardian, a foul creature that I truly believe spawned in what would have to be the blackest part of the Netherhells.

    I made my way to my prize through the cosplay gallery halls and past the corpses of fellow competitors unwise enough to click on that video of that army guy singing Britney Spears, and just as I was about to claim my prize, I heard something stir behind me. I spun around ready to battle, and then I saw it.

    The Wildgoose.

    I had heard tales of this heartless abomination. A foul creature with jet black eyes, breath foul enough to turn men into stone and a peculiar collection of pictures from games that no one under 27 can identify.

    Alas, this is where my shame and defeat begin, as fear took over me and I ran. I made no attempt to fight. I simply ran as fast as my legs would take me whlie the creature pursued. It was easily the most frightening experience in my life. And although I may have failed to secure the object of my desire, the Sacred 2 Collectors Edition with somewhat arousing Seraphim Figurine, I escaped with something more precious to me: my life.

    As I told the story of my ordeal at the local tavern, the same question was posed by all, “Tell us Dammit: How did you get out of Wildgoose’s lair?” The answer is simple, I remembered the stories about the creatures diet. It is said The Wildgoose has quite an appetite for browser based games. Every lunchtime it leaves its lair and hunts the vast skies of the internet for nourishment and procrastination.

    The memory had come to me just as the creature cornered me and was about to show me the penalties of calling the competition judge “a foul smelling abomination spawned in the blackest pits of the Netherhells”. Just as it was about to pounce, I said “Dude, did you see that new flash game by some random indie developer? It’s like Metal Slug only all the Nazi’s are pictures of Michael Atkinson!!” With a malicious smile the creature fled into the darkness, to go search for this exquisite delicacy.

    Alone at last in the temple, I had a chance to take the Collector’s Edition of Sacred 2 I so coveted, but instead I walked away. Tears of shame filled my eyes and vomit from smelling that disgusting monster filled my shoes. I did not deserve the personal time with the Seraphim Figurine I so desired. No hero was I.

    So now I sit here, on a rock amongst the foothills surrounding temple Kotaku writing in this journal. Nursing my wounds and meditating on the past few days. Perhaps, The Wildgoose will see that I have come a long way to be the best contender for the Sacred 2 Collector’s Edition it protects so ferociously – and not take my sense of humour personally. And perhaps, just perhaps, the creature will judge me worthy enough to drop unto me the game (and figurine) I so desperately seek as it flies out to find its next lunchtime timewaster.

    - Shoitaan “Please don’t hate me David” Raqkhosh

    29/08/2009 - The pillaging of Sacred
    Your name is getting around, FearlessWatcher. You've made your way into and out of World of Warcraft - more than most mortals can claim.

    I need to ask a special favour of you. As part of our research, Kotaku AU has been trying to track down and obtain Sacred 2.

    Unfortunately, none of the agents we've sent to retrieve Sacred 2 have returned alive. David Wildgoose was the last to be sent; see if you can find him on the intarwebs and enquire of any leads.

    Light be with you young adventurer.

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