Who Won All That Borderlands Swag?

Last week we were giving away a loot-load of Borderlands prize packs. Here are all five winners and the guns they designed.

Congratulations to these five guys. I’ll be in touch shortly to arrange delivery of your prizes.

Monday’s Winner
asimovy’s Phat Looter
“Using the amazing power of science, the Phat Looter will suck up all available loot from enemies in a 100 meter radius. Without needing to kill them!

But thats not all! The phat Looter’s secondary fire mode will launch all sub-par or useless loot back at the enemy dealing huge damage! Just in case they want their loot back!”

Tuesday’s Winner
Reaver’s Blue Phoenix
“My blue 1985 Mazda 323 hatch is the weapon of choice.
It has many features that make it the perfect post apocalyptic companion.

Able to reach speeds of close to 100km per hour*, making it a decent battering ram/person plow.

It has ample storage space for various weapons and loot that would inevitably needs to be collected in Pandoras barren hostile landscape. Or alternatively bring your friends and experience the adventure of the struggle for survival together in its 4 intact seats.

Doubles as a shelter from various dust storms/snow storms/acid rain storms/zombie hordes that one might come across.

Can run on all kinds of combustible liquids no matter how crude and unrefined.

Most importantly when it is prevented from functioning due to technical issues, a little love and care and some consultation with the owners manual will lead to its resurrection. (This has been tested on numerous occasions under many conditions, hence the name Blue Phoenix)

only $3000 (ono)
Ask for Reaver
Shed #3 Fyrestone

*(downhill slope and tail wind may be required to reach said speeds)”

Wednesday’s Winner
Dominic Harman’s Honourable Mention Gun
“While certainly not the best gun to be found in the wastes, it packs a fair punch and makes you proud to have it. Sure, occasionally you will stare at it in minor shame knowing that it isn’t the best gun out there, but in moments such as these it is just important to pat yourself on the back and recognise the fact that you still have a quality gun. Key features of this gun include its encouragement to find a better gun and its random selection of songs that will play at various moments including “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life”, “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” and “I Can See Clearly Now.”

Thursday’s Winner
Aaron’s Sense of Civic Duty Pistol
“It always bothered me in games like Fallout and Borderlands, worlds with a severely diminished population, that you spent so much time killing bandits and raiders, people who could be rehabilitated to help in rebuilding the infrastructure. Not to mention the hereditary damage of the reduced diversity in the gene pool.

To combat this long term problem I propose the SOCD Pistol. Or Sense of Civic Duty Pistol. Loaded with darts containing a carefully tailored chemical agent. A hit will send the chemical straight to the targets medulla oblangata, at which point they will drop their weapon and leave the battle, walking straight to the nearest farm or water purification facility where they will volunteer as free labour.

Like politicians fail to do, I think post apocalyptic scenario games need to think long term.”

Friday’s Winner
Viroxide’s Good Hair Day Ray
“So many of Pandoras’ residents suffer from premature baldness due to the harsh environment and years of inbreeding. The side effects of this terrible situation can be seen through out the land. So many Pandoran men have turned to violence and destruction due the helplessness and frustration they feel every day. Studies show that bald men are 4 times more likely to vandalise property, torment the public and self mutilate in an attempt to unleash the rage that builds in them everyday they see themselves in the mirror.

The GHD Ray will put a smile on even the most ruthless of raiders faces. Simply aim at the unfortunate sufferer of premature baldness and hold the beam upon them for several seconds. Within mere minutes golden locks of joy will flow down to their shoulders, freeing them from the haunting prison that is premature baldness.

No longer plagued by the aggravation of premature baldness, subjects have shown a 80% increase in productivity and have given up their once violent lives to become a helping part of the community.

Take for example our new spokesperson, Brick Swortsenaga, who has experienced the GHD Ray first hand. Brick often resorted to violent fist fights to unleash his anger, and led a ruthless life of non-stop action. Since experiencing the GHD Ray Brick now sports a glowing mane of sun bleached hair and has changed his ways. Brick has become an active member of the community doing his part to make Pandora a better place, and has recently been elected Governor of Fyrestone.

So come on, do your part, try the GHD Ray today and help make the world a better place, one head of hair at a time.”

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