WIN! Bayonetta’s Xbox 360 Climax Edition

72
WIN! Bayonetta’s Xbox 360 Climax Edition

Sega and Devil May Cry creator Hideki Kamiya’s hair-raising new action game is officially released in Australia this week. Here’s how you can win the aptly-named Climax Edition… and we reveal Tuesday’s winning limerick.

Thanks to Sega we have five Bayonetta Climax Editions on Xbox 360 to give away this week. We’ll be giving away one per day until Friday.

Inside the Aussie exclusive limited edition you’ll find:

* A copy of Bayonetta on Xbox 360 in premium slipcase packaging
* A replica Scarborough Fair, Bayonetta’s beloved pistol which she has strapped to her hands and feet
* A 36-page hardcover art book
* A CD of the game’s soundtrack

Scroll down for a pic of everything inside the Bayonetta Climax Edition.

So how do you win?

Given Bayonetta’s rather raunchy nature, we figured it was time to get you all writing limericks again. After all, the best limericks are always just a little bit naughty.

Your limerick must begin with some variation on the line: “There once was a girl called Bayonetta…” And it must follow standard AABBA limerick rhyming form.

Leave your limericks in the comments below. You must enter by midnight to be eligible for the day’s draw and winners will be announced at 10am the following day when the new draw opens.

You may only enter once per day. If multiple entries are received, only the first one will count. If you wish to enter the next day’s draw, you must enter a new limerick.

Good luck!

And Tuesday’s winner is… Dan!

Here’s Dan’s winning limerick:

In regards to that girl Bayonetta,
some helpful advice for good measure,
her climax in fact,
is a form of attack,
so be on your guard if you bed her

[Terms and Conditions]

Comments

  • So finally Bayonetta comes to Australia,
    she’s got all the Aussie boys saying “I’d nail ya!”
    but what these blokes don’t know,
    and our censors won’t show,
    is that this woman has bloody huge genitalia.

    Congratulations to Dan!

  • There was a girl called Bayonetta,
    She not one who looks like a mother,
    But making babies she would love to practice,
    Until the sheets were thrown from the mattress,
    Or until her magic bar fills higher.

  • Damn. Okay, how about…

    There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    Whose hair she would use as a cover,
    But in the US you see
    They didn’t agree
    And she was charged with indecent exposure.

  • Damn, Bayonetta is fine,
    With quite an attractive design,
    I don’t think I can last,
    I’m going to come fast,
    Thank god she can slow down time.

  • There was a girl called Bayonetta
    whose PS3 port was not to the letter
    The loading was crap,
    “we’ll look into a patch”
    Yeah right: Kotaku readers know better.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Remember her name ’cause one day you might forget her
    She’s tall and strong
    And shoots all night long
    Practise all night long ’cause you might miss her.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    From the creator of Devil May Cry who thought he could do better,

    With a malformed head, big hits and a move called the climax,
    Gun boots, librarian glasses, and hair covering slacks,

    She certainly fits the bill of Japanese game character to the Letter !

  • There once was a Miss Bayonetta
    Who dreamed her life could be better
    A witch, she became
    And sought power and fame
    And inspired awe in any who met her

  • Sadface. I thought yesterday’s was my finest work but I knew I was sunk when I saw Dan’s.

    Let’s go again:

    There was was a girl named Bayonetta
    A giantess, godlike in stature
    It’d take more than a day
    Just to find the way
    From one set of lips to the nethers

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Who was vastly superior to her visual predecessor
    The action was over the top
    It meant one could never stop
    The devil may cry afta

  • At the bottom of the lake laid the witch, Bayonetta
    Ten years ago she awoke with no memories altogether
    Stuck in a terrible blight,
    help in joining her fight,
    and she’ll reward you with a flash of her nether.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    Her hair made up her sweater.
    Sometimes it would unravel,
    To create a giant gavel,
    And make all her enemies redder.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta…
    Who had breasts the size of a Vespa
    Cunning in speed
    And Powerful indeed
    She’s like my girlfriend but better!

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    who kept her guns in a nice rayon sweater.
    But when put in a game,
    she thought synthetics too tame;
    au naturale will sell far better.

  • Well done Dan – I thought your Day 1 entry was the bomb too!

    There once was a girl named Bayonetta
    Whose large chest filled out her sweater.
    But her tight buns
    Come with four guns.
    So all who meet her regret her.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    Whos arsenal were mad tits and beretta,
    How sweet would it be,
    To have her jump out the TV,
    And to give me a gyrating hum-dinga!

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    who strained everyone’s graphics processor.
    With her figure so fine,
    she can slow down time.
    Everyone’s bed sheets are now a little wetter.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Who enjoyed to complete her Vendetta.
    One day in the rain,
    Her hair lost its tame;
    and devoured her friend, Anetta.

  • Bayonetta’s a girl full of sin
    But there’s worse than her gun-shoes within.
    There are baddies who cry,
    Even wish they could die,
    At her soul-searing phrase “Is it in?”

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    The ultimate leather clad trendsetter,
    If you think she’s a bit of fun,
    Just remember her pink gun,
    And you won’t be regretting that you met her!

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Who awoke from a 500-year slumber.
    She fought Demons a long while,
    Wearing only a smile,
    So she became the first Hair-Raising Streaker!

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    Who got in big strife with her debtor
    She hated that dude
    So much that she spewed
    forth a gloriously evil vendetta.

  • There was a hottie, Bayonetta,
    I swear that you’d blow if you met her,
    Or should I say climax,
    Um quickly an ice pack!
    Too late!…oh god i feel better

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Wielded weapons of the highest caliber
    From her deadly locks
    Down to her pistol-packin socks
    A genuine femme-fatal terminator

  • Meet Bayonetta, the woman in black,
    start shit with her and she’ll fight back,
    she’ll shoot her guns,
    flash her buns,
    and distract u with her rack

  • There once was a girl named Bayonetta,
    who’d take you to bed if you let her.
    With moves you’ve never felt,
    this witch’d make you melt,
    five centuries’ experience makes a girl *so* much better.

  • Bayonetta is a character with a twist,
    she is actually a well crafted witch,
    with thighs all men wish to bed,
    and a chest that goes unsaid,
    get your Climax package and give it a flick

  • Bayonetta, for those who are unaware
    Is a witch with shapeshifting hair
    when shes in climax
    hair spawns magical attacks
    Is it the same downstairs?

  • There once was a dessert,Streets Viennetta
    Of eating quality you could find none better
    With rippled layers of cream
    and a chocolate crunch so supreme
    Oh crap, this was to be about Bayonetta

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Who put out an ad in the paper
    I’ve got a large chest
    Come and look at the rest
    At my garage sale down by the manor

  • I once knew this girl, Bayonetta
    Who would often do promos for Peta
    Although I found it absurd
    When she transformed into a bird
    With a sign saying don’t try to eat her

  • There once was a girl, Bayonetta
    By modesty she wasn’t fettered
    Her method of attack
    Was to get out her rack
    To the joy of every guy who met her

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    Who in the mail received a letter,
    That detailed a nice location,
    For non-stop gunning action,
    Sent by a super-villain admirer.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    Who’s reviews were none short of stellar,
    But as time will tell,
    If her game doesn’t sell,
    She’ll keep company with the works of Tim Schafer

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Who one day misplaced her English Setter
    She looked high and low
    For her best friend but no show
    But who cares, her pussy…cat is better

  • I believe I met a girl named Bayonetta,
    Who I went to bed with a little bit later,
    She’s a shapeshifter you see,
    A great sexual fantasy,
    But I’m left wondering if she’s really a ‘her’.

  • uʍop ǝpısdn pןɹoʍ ʎɯ pǝuɹnʇ ǝɥs
    ssıʞ ɐ ǝɯ ʍǝןq uǝɥʇ
    sdıɥ ɹǝɥ pǝʎɐʍs ǝɥs
    punoɹɐ pǝʞɔıʞ ǝɥs suoɯǝp puɐ sןǝƃuɐ
    uʍoʇ oʇ ǝɯɐɔ ɐʇʇǝuoʎɐq pǝɯɐu ןıɹƃ ɐ

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    who had lots of demons trying to kill her.
    she pulled out her gun,
    blew them to kingdom kung.
    and now she’s a lot better

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta…
    Once seen is hard to forget’her
    All leather, and hair,
    Tis hard not to stare.
    Now the curtains sure match the drapes, yeah?

  • There once was a witch called Bayonetta,
    Who had no relation to Glinda,
    The Green one who melts,
    When water is felt,
    Or the flattened one who now looks like John Cena.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Picked her up when her game broke street date’a
    The gameplay was great
    Everything else sucked
    This prize should go to a collecta’

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    In regards to real girls she is better,
    For with a flick of her hair,
    Her breasts become bare,
    And all of our pants become wetter.

    XD

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Baggy pants, eye glasses, woolen sweater
    Her clothes have gone and gents came a rushing
    No makeup, fancy hairstyle and no air brushing
    But the glasses remain(she needs them to see better)

  • Bayonetta was a witch with great power,
    Whom many demons wanted to deflower,
    But with her guillotine,
    And her hair that is mean,
    They’d have lived longer with a cold shower

  • This girl Bayonetta surely is moody
    Always on task and stays in duty
    Killing’s her passion
    Just under her fashion
    But boy does she have a big booty

  • Bayonetta was a mighty fine lass,
    who had a most splendid ass,
    but if touch it you dare,
    well please have a care,
    for the last thing you’ll see is foot blasts!

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    Who you would never forget if you met her
    Packing a sword and some guns
    And some bootilicous buns
    She’s one kick ass witch dressed in leather

  • There once was a girl girl called Bayonetta,
    Who killed Hansels sister, Gretta.
    It was because she hooked up with the male.
    From that fairy-tale.
    So now she mates with Hansel and out of his dick comes fetta.

  • I dont have the brain power atm to write something –but if this counts

    If bayonetta is a witch, the only thing that would fall on her is a sexyhouse…

  • The once was a girl called Bayonetta
    whom once climaxed was all the better
    improperly explained to my lady
    she thought i was being shady
    so proceeded to write sega a stern letter

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta
    whose cosplayers all wear leather
    so give me the pink gun
    which ill tell everyone i won
    While having a massive kegger

    just kidding…..
    i dont have friends T_T

  • There once was a lady called Bayonette,
    A depraved teacher I’ll never forget
    For when we mucked about
    “Die monsters!” she would shout,
    Stripping to terrify each little Prep

  • Such a saucy lass was Bayonetta,
    that by clothing she would not be fettered.
    She cried “No need for dresses
    when I’ve curls, locks and tresses!”
    But in truth, all that dandruff upset her.

  • There once was a girl called bayonetta
    In a game developed by sega
    It’s not devil may cry
    but it’s by the same guy
    and his name is Hideki Kamiya

  • There once was a girl, Bayonetta
    She’d torment all those that upset her
    Each met their demise
    Distracted by thighs
    One peek ‘fore her hair came to get ya

  • I have been struck by cupids arrow, oh Bayonetta,
    and the worst thing is my friends don’t get her.
    Your wasting your time her boobs are too small,
    and her face, she looks like a Sarah Palin doll.
    They all say Dante’s so much better.

  • There once was a girl named Bayonetta,
    Whose hot bod couldn’t get any better,
    When she took off her clothes,
    In demo videos,
    I prayed she’d become a trend-setter.

  • There once was a girl called Bayonetta,
    With seductive moves could kill anything that let her,
    But don’t let the glasses fool you,
    This saucy vixen could melt down an igloo.

Log in to comment on this story!