WIN! Aliens Vs Predator Hunter Edition On PC

WIN! Aliens Vs Predator Hunter Edition On PC
ImageOur week-long Aliens Vs Predator giveaway continues today with PC Hunter Edition up for grabs. And we find out who won yesterday’s 360 draw.

UPDATE: Thursday’s draw closed at midnight.

Thanks to Sega we have SIX copies of Aliens Vs Predator, the new first-person shooter from Rebellion launching today, to give away. From now until the weekend we’ll be giving away one copy per day across PC, PS3 and Xbox 360.

They’re not just any old copies though, they’re the Hunter Edition. That’s the very limited edition that includes: * The game * Steelbook case * Four bonus multiplayer maps * A replica mouldable facehugger * A Weyland sleeve badge * A 3D lenticular card

That’s right, I said replica mouldable facehugger.

To enter today’s draw for the PC edition you’re going to have to write a limerick that begins: “There once was an alien/a predator/a colonial marine named…” (Just choose one!)

You’ve got until midnight tonight to leave your limerick in the comments below. No multiple entries are allowed. However, you may of course enter tomorrow’s draw.

And the winner of Wednesday’s 360 draw is Phillip Mayes for his puntastically giggle-worthy haiku:

Dear Alien Queen Sorry bout the scrambled eggs Lots of love, Ripley

[Terms and Conditions]


  • There once was a colonial marine named Stace,
    who was stationed somewhere in space,
    she went to the dance,
    would not drop her pants,
    so the alien impregnated her face.

  • There once was an alien queen
    who spawned to make people scream
    the terror she caused
    was worth the applause
    but now I can no longer dream

  • There once was an alien named Fred
    Who wanted to bite off your head
    Tried as he might
    He put up a fight,
    But that airlock ensured he was dead.

  • There once was an a predator called Clancy,
    he hunted anything and everything he fancied.
    he spied an alien queen,
    then emptied his bowels crystal clean,
    and the marine yelled “OMG YOU F**KING NANCY”

    • Not really a fair statement to make..

      How would you like someone telling you your entries ‘suck’?

      First of all the winner far from sucks. It is exactly the type of thing that wins prizes constantly here. It’s topical and witty and i don’t see why it wouldn’t deserve a win.

      Secondly, yesterday was FULL of fantastic entires and unfortunately not all of them can win (as much as i would kill for this prize lol).

      Everyone’s favorite is a matter of personal opinion, and in this case kotaku’s opinion says this guy is the winner fair and square.

      So how about instead of touting thats the entry is FAIL, either be constructive and congratulate the winner or occupy your idle fingers and opinions elsewhere.

    • i stilll think the guy who won the original PC copy didnt deserve it as there were 3-4 other jokes posted hours before that one with the same content

      he just fleshed it out a bit more but theres nothing to say that he may or may not have gotten the idea from another post

      (Be nice if you could hide all the replys then release them on the next days (winner/ new game annoncement)

        • oh it was the most well written of the ones that touched the subject material(i made an inspired one based of someone elses idea(that i never expected to win as id already entered) But it would still be nice to make sure people arent stealing ideas 😛

  • There once was a predator named bob,
    whose job it was to catch cod,
    he went swimming in there,
    got snagged by his hair,
    now he’s stuck in their lair.

  • There once was a marine named JCVD
    From the predator role he did flee
    The suit was “too clumsy and too hot”
    so they gave away his spot
    Kevin Peter Hall may you R.I.P.

  • There once was an Alien named Jon
    Who told me “you’re doing it wrong”
    I said “WTF?”
    He said “hold it young buck”
    Then his little mouth sang me a song

  • There once was a predator named Will
    Who could not bring himself to kill
    So when hunting alone
    He’d rob graves for the bones
    But his pred-hood remained stuck at nil

  • There once a predator with a Spear
    That helped him collect many Skulls
    And he always held it very near
    Only to lose it when killed
    By a man who was much too old

  • There once was an Alien called Buck
    who burst through a Marine and got stuck
    he looked up at the Marine
    as he let out a scream
    and tore out the rest of his gut

  • There once was a marine called Kevin
    Whom looked very much like Michael Bevan
    He made a bat of of sticks
    With all his might hit a six
    And sent that evil predator to heaven

  • There once was a colonial marine named The Mother,
    when an alien ran off with her lover:
    In charged the whole team,
    then ensues lots of screams,
    which won me a replica facehugger. 🙂

  • There once was a Predator called Trent
    Who gave up the fight for Lent
    Four days passed by
    It was worth a try
    Now it’s time for him to vent

  • There once was an alien named Bill.
    No wait, it was a predator named Jill.
    Actually it might have been,
    A colonial marine called Irene.
    To be honest I’m not really sure whom I did kill.

  • There once was an alien queen
    who thrust her tail right through a man’s spleen
    he wished he was dead
    he gave birth instead
    it was’t a pretty scene

  • There once was a Predator named Wayne,
    Our love was as powerful as a train,
    At last he went south;
    Mask off, open mouth,
    I knew then, I was in for some pain.

  • There once was a marine from Kentucket,
    Who was stationed on a space bucket.
    After vanquishing the predators
    and getting reamed by the creditors
    he told them all to go suck it.

  • There once was a predator named Trevor
    Who thought he was awfully clever
    He’d port from tv
    to that wonder pc
    then his ties with big Arnie he would sever

  • There once was a calonial marine named Newt.
    All grown up now. Tough to boot.
    Family got F$%#ed
    Forced to hide in duct.
    Payback is ganna be a hoot.

  • There once was a marine who was filled with gloom.
    “Hey” I asked. “Are you that space guy from Doom?”
    “For christs sake no I’m not.
    I get that question quite a lot.”
    He then left whilst pushing his broom.

  • There once was an alien named Frank,
    who yearned for something to gank.
    A man arrived,
    which Frank hugged as it writhed,
    then out popped a surprised baby Hank! :O

  • There once was a marine from Tuscon
    Who had an unnaturally large dong
    An alien dropped in,
    Copped and eyeful of him,
    n’ said “That chestburster’s doing it all wrong”

  • There once was a woman named Weaver,
    The talk of martians used to peeve her.
    She met a facehugger
    And thought, ‘Oh Bugger!’
    Now she’s an alien believer!

  • There once was an Alien named Keene.
    An unstoppable murder machine.
    Men everywhere cried,
    for Freud hadn’t lied:
    Phallus monsters are truly obscene.

  • There’s a hardcore marine named Macgyver,
    Who caught his wife sucking face with a spider,
    With paper clip in hand,
    And a little rubber band,
    He aborted the alien inside her!

  • There once was a sick young Alien named Beaver,
    who suffered from a severe hallucinogenic fever.
    One day it saw Ripley & said “I Love You Mum”.
    When Ripley shouted back “Die You Alien Scum”,
    Aliens learnt not to f**k with Sigourney Weaver.

  • There once was a Predator who was named Erving
    Who hangs at Atkinson’s door 2 in the morning
    He slips threatening notes
    Before off slitting throats
    Giving all of Australia a good laughing

    btw Facebook connect isn’t working for me.. It used to, now it only works on Gizmodo (even though I clicked Connect with Facebook on Kotaku), coming to Kotaku and its gone again.

  • There once was an alien called Pat
    Who was teased, tormented and laughed at
    He was almost cute
    And little to boot:
    “It’s not fair, I was hatched from a cat!”

  • There once was an alien named Chester,
    Who studied a Bachelor of Economics at ANU.
    He married his high-school girlfriend,
    Had three beautiful children,
    And died from a brain tumour at age 60.

  • there once was a haiku on kotaku
    that one a big contest i tell you
    it sounded familiar
    to a likerick from earlier
    but Claire didn’t mind, she knows voodoo

  • There was once a colonial marine named Atkinson
    Who thinks all gamers are Manson
    He wants them stopped
    We want him chopped
    So we can play NecroVisioN!

  • There was an “colonial marine” named Ripley
    Who for 57 years slept quite deeply
    She replaced her dead child
    But threw herself in a fire
    Because birthing queen aliens is creepy

  • There once was a Predator named Bill
    who could become invisible at will.
    No matter who tried,
    he could not be spied.
    But only when perfectly still.

  • There once was an alien named Fred,
    Who had trouble with a girl named Deb,
    When he tried his luck,
    And proceeded to pucker up,
    He put a hole through the back of her head.

  • There once was a Marine named Chris Hansen,
    Who set a trap with his son.
    Predator said “what some candy?”
    for he was very randy.
    Then Chris gave him something to sit on.

  • There once was a Marine named Newman,
    Who was ridiculed by his fellow crewman,
    When the Aliens attached,
    He was the first to react,
    His grave reads “Not Bad… For A Human.”

    • I’m hoping you can delete that to fix the spelling error, it should read:

      There once was a Marine named Newman,
      Who was ridiculed by his fellow crewman,
      When the Aliens attacked,
      He was the first to react,
      His grave reads “Not Bad… For A Human.”

  • There once was a marine named Zap
    Who’s rifle kept taking a nap
    up came a xeno
    who didn’t like Leno
    and made Zap’s neck go snap

  • There once was an alien named Clement
    That was the subject of a super soldier experiment
    With shiny new implants
    And guns used as transplants
    He’s more robot than alien to a certain extent.

  • There once was an alien named Lee,
    who went out at night, mostly.
    He liked the clubbing scene,
    to try and pass on his genes
    to a girl he’d face-humped quite briefly.

  • There once was an Alien named Phil
    He refused to cover the bill
    The damage was intense
    So he scarpered up the fence
    Then turned and began to kill

  • There once was a predator named Preen
    Who skulled a can of kerosine
    Thought he was wolverine
    Saw the queen
    Broke his spleen
    And couldn’t get up in the morning…

  • There once was a colonial marine named Faye,
    The first alien she did blow away,
    Facehuggers just kept on coming,
    And the acid did sting,
    Until the predator blew away the whole bay.

  • There once was an Alien named Bassid,
    And he happened to be anything but placid.
    I fired my gun,
    And became quite glum,
    To find that his blood was acid!

    I couldn’t think of a name other than a teacher at my school, so I used it. Pretty rare name though! Haha.

  • There once was a predator named Frank,
    who had no money in the bank,
    in order to retire
    he hunted tobey maguire
    which is why spiderman 3 stank.

  • There once was an alien named Bob,
    Who got fired from his job,
    So he called in a favour,
    and a couple of days later,
    He was chilling in Human Resources.

  • There once was an alien named Wildgoose
    Who had run out of ideas to use
    Every day a new chore
    Jokes and poems galore
    Oh well, I guess it is Friday Haikus

  • there once was an alien called old Greg
    Who had a light between his legs
    Face huggers will find ya
    cos of his mangina
    he laid lots of alien eggs

  • There once was a predator named jill
    She fell down a hill
    chasing an alien named jack
    but alas she couldnt find her way back
    jack thought she was such a dill

  • There once was an Alien named “my Wife”
    She became quite discontent with her life
    A sequel movie has-been
    You know, the Alien Queen
    So she slit her wrists with a knife.

  • There once was an Alien named Yoda,
    Who failed at driving a loader.
    The marines all got pissed,
    As the Xenomorphs hissed,
    And they turned that green fool into soda!

    Yoda is difficult to rhyme with 🙁

  • There once was a predator named Sting
    With an alien he did have a fling
    They’d stay up all night
    And talk ’til daylight
    About life and love and antiquing

  • There once was a Predator named Nick,
    Who had somewhat of a nervous tick,
    Whenever he spoke,
    His friends all went to cloak,
    Because they only heard: “click, click, click.”

  • There once was an alien named Burt,
    Whose claim to fame was rather subvert,
    Warm in gestation,
    Then with a sensation,
    He did burst from the chest of John Hurt.

  • There once was an alien named Greer
    as a face hugger, from it’s egg did it peer
    if found a face to violate
    then a chest to ventilate
    and now all who gaze on it feel fear

  • There once was a predator named Doug,
    who was as cute as a flesh-eating bug.
    He watched and he crept,
    slicing the marine as he leapt,
    and then he used its skull as a mug.

  • blah, too much thought for mine. I think it’s in the right form, right? D:
    time for some pewpew relief.

    There once was an alien named E.T.
    lured home to little young Gertie
    soon after they are friends
    the journey draws to end
    family awaits through forestry

  • There once was a predator named Mel
    Who’s camouflage didn’t work to well
    She tried to hunt some sailors
    They turned out to be whalers
    And now she is a Japanese hair gel

  • There once was an alien named Sigourney Weaver
    She starred in James Cameron’s latest big screener
    With three films of Alien to contend
    Her reign of survival comes to an end
    Who would’ve thought a gun could defeat her?

  • there once was an alien in command
    the king of the land
    for him life was grand
    but the marine’s they cried
    they fell and they died
    they armed themselfs well ready to fight
    for the aliens would ignite
    they predator he waited
    he slipped in and sedated
    the valient marine
    and used them as a latrine

  • The once was a predator called Gary,
    Who was gay with an alien called Larry.
    Oh yes it was kinky,
    They did it right up the stinky.
    The predator hit notes higher than Mariah Carey.

  • There once was an alien named Grace
    Who crawled from her egg and thought “I must find a face”
    She clambered along the walls, ceilings and floors
    Until she found an air vent above a door
    So inside she went, into that place
    On her endless search to find that perfect face

    She made it outside, it was very dark
    This would make sneaking up on marines a walk in the park!
    So she scrambled across the ground, determined to leave her mark
    And impregnante some marine named Clark

    A while after, Clark awoke in a sweat
    But by then his fate had already been set
    For inside his chest
    Something had built a nest
    And it’s interested were not in his best
    His ribs splintered, his muscle was eaten
    He knew right then that he had been beaten
    His chest exploded in a shower of red
    Clark was then declared legally dead

    The worm grew and grew
    Feasting on the pets of the crew
    Until finally, when she was at her peak
    She hunted the marines, their outlook was bleak
    One by one she slaughtered them all
    Who could of guessed she started out so small?

    This did not go unseen
    For a predator was too keen
    And he was one of the more mean
    He tracked the alien, trying to remain hidden
    The alien sensed him and thought “Oh you’ve got to be kiddin”

    The fight was on, the prize was to live
    She predator moved in, blades ready to shiv
    They exchanged blows, a surrender neither would give
    The alien was quick, the predator strong
    In the end they both knew that this was going to be long

    A few hours later, after skirmishes numbering plenty
    The predator pressed a few buttons, and his wrist then read twenty
    He snuffed out a laugh as the alien ran away
    He was going to stalemate the end of this day
    His bomb detonated in a big ball of blue
    The blast wave vapourising all it could chew

    The alien was quick, she could not outrun
    The big ball of plasma, as hot as the sun
    She ducked and weaved, as fast as she could run
    But she wasnt fast enough, the predator had won

  • The humans were ready for battle
    but predator killed them like cattle
    amongst the melee
    dead aliens three
    were leaking green blood that eats metal.

  • there once was a alien. his name was patrick. he lived across a hous full of meat he went to that house ans sayd do you sell brains the man sayd no we only sell eggse patrick sayd hy is it called meathouse and the man sayd becuase in the eggs are facehugger and that is meat. patrick whas angery and killed the man and in the end patrick sold his meat.

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