What Happened To David's Junk?

Since Mass Effect 2's newest piece of downloadable content deals with crime in the art world, we're left wondering who was behind this, surely the galaxy's most famous art heist?

After the Mona Lisa's dour face, art's most memorable piece of human anatomy is probably the junk found on Michelangelo's David. It's just... out there. There's even a Simpsons episode devoted to it.

Well, and this isn't really a spoiler, David turns up in Mass Effect 2, during a new downloadable mission involving Kasumi Goto, the newest member of Commander Shepard's crew. With the game being set in 2183, he's looking a little worse for wear. There are large cracks on his face and torso, he's missing an arm, a leg and... something else.

Yes, his junk. In the intervening decades David's most famous asset has been lost. Actually, scratch that, it looks like it's been clawed off in a fit of rage. Leaving us to wonder: have BioWare and/or EA engaged in a spot of artistic self-censorship? Or is this a spot of visual story-telling, hinting at some dire future Earth, where not only is the Italian government incapable of ensuring David's well-being, but future Florence is crawling with vigilante puritans.

Puritans with large hammers.


Comments

    Interesting. I can't purchase the content (not connected to LIVE) but I'd love to see what the info says about the piece.

      That examine thing? Kasumi makes comment about it being Michelangelo's David. Something like "wow" and how she was in awe and would fit through the door, nothing about his missing appendage. I liked the Dragon Age salute, the giant Ogre.

    Ooohhh come on, are these people seriously so concerned about a piece of marble shaped like a penis?

    Or perhaps you need to scan the new planets and as you go exploring you find the penis and return it victoriously clutched in hand.

    I'm certain it's got to do with Earth's history. They've been way to vague about Earth for it to mean anything other than destruction, enslavement or some other kind of disaster.

    No, no, this obviously wasn't the work of vandals. Obviously the Vatican removed his junk on purpose, in order to place it in a much more secure location.

      davids cock code

    After reading the headline, I immediately thought this was an article about David Wildgoose.
    Thank god I was wrong.

      lol! :)

    A lot of statues had their junk removed by the Papacy and others over history. Odds are if you see a statue in Italy with a fig leaf, it's been added later to replace the gap.

    So maybe we regressed to the Middle Ages by the time Mass Effect 2 is set :P

    People would complain about it in a videogame though.

    And don't think it's only Americans who are prudes:

    http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/pornographic-pizza-roundly-panned/story-e6frea6u-1225849354299

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