Kotaku Gift Guide: Secret Santa

Secret Santas can be a bitch. You can't spend that much so whatever you buy is typically tat, a pair of rubbish socks, deodorant, a bar of bloody soap. That's usually as good as it gets. Now, thanks to our gift guide, that's all about to change.

Here are a couple of suggestions for decent-ish presents that are cheap, disposable, but will delight most gamers.

SUGGESTION #1 Navi Classic Thong: RRP $15.50 Wow. Why did it take so long for me to realise this existed. A Navi thong. I think this is quite possibly the only way to reverse engineer my irrational hatred of Navi - by putting her on a thong. This is awesome.

SUGGESTION #2 Cacodemon Doom Charm: RRP $6.00US Look at this. It's adorable! He's a little demon hellspawn with terrifying teeth and he can attach to your keys/handbag! You can't lose with this. Just make sure the recipient has played doom, or you'll be getting some strange looks.

SUGGESTION #3 Mario Slippers: RRP $14.95 Mario slippers. You can't go wrong with Mario slippers. They have Mario on them - everyone loves Mario. Except my wife, who for some reason hates him. 'Why is he dressed up like a bee', she says? 'He's a middle-aged man with a moustache and he's dressed up in a bee outfit.' If your Secret Santa is my wife, then avoid this purchase. Otherwise? You should be good.


    Calling a G-string a thong?

    Mark, you're not a true Australian. Thongs are worn on your feet.

      Oh my gawd. I'm so getting into this argument.

        ...I think this warrants a campaign (following the R18+ campaign) on Kotaku, with 2-3 articles per day that reflect upon both sides of the fence to bring this serious issue to the attention of the general public and demand a resolution.

        Think of the possibilities! :3

        Please we all know they're really called Jandels bro.

          Git yoursilf beck to New Zealand Bro.

            bahhaa, it's spelt jandAls but. japanese sandals :P true story, a real live kiwi told me once :D

      "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

    I wish you had provided links :(

      Yeah. Unlike Mark, *MY* wife would be overjoyed to receive some Mario slippers!

      It took me about 30 seconds to find all 3 via google. Not that hard.

    Mario looks like a bee? Huh? How in the hell could anyone think Mario looks like a bee? I'm so confused, Mario isn't even similar colours to any bees I've ever seen/heard about o.0


      I'm assuming you're not a Wii owner or just haven't played Mario Galaxy.

    Penny Arcade forums do a really good secret santa (well, they did when I participated in it last year); you stalked another (randomly selected) user for afew weeks, found out their likes/dislikes, and sent something to the value of USD$30 or so with afew clues as to who you are.

    I ended up getting drumsticks, a guitar strap and some other gear for a newly-purchased Guitar Hero World Tour Kit. I then sent someone a copy of Uncharted (which was platinum here, but not in the US) and some other gear. Everyone wins, plus it's got the benefit of being all christmassy and all that :)

    Something for Kotaku to do next year perhaps? Hopefully it'd work out a bit more easier with a more user-friendly comment/forum system in the new year? ;)

    I have an idea. Kotaku contest. Hottest girl to wear a Navi thong wins stuff.

    Get on it Mark. For the people.

    Thanks mark! I bought the thong for my work mate... will send pictures if you like. But not with them on...

      That wasnt intended the way it came out and went in...

        Going to shut up

    Wish you provided buy links :)

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