Talk Amongst Yourselves

This is where Kotaku readers go to talk about the stuff we’re not already posting about. Think of it as the official unofficial Kotaku community forum.

You can talk about games. Or movies. Or politics. Music. Food. Science. Sport. Insert your own miscellaneous off-topic discussion here. Just keep it clean.

We’ll be promoting this post each morning until Sunday to let the conversation continue all week. Makes more sense than starting a new comments thread every day.

Talk amongst yourselves below…


    Well.. spent most of the free time on my weekend playing FFXIII on PS3, and I'm definately seeing why so many people bag it. Sure the graphics are very beautiful, but the gameplay... in almost every single fight I don't even have to try, just keep hitting X for auto-battle and L1 to switch if I need healing. Almost fell asleep trying to cut through a lot of froglike enemies to get to the last save point before calling it quits for the day when I was playing it yesterday. lol

      Man that seriously sucks.. i used to love the FF series.. now it just seems to be getting worse and worse.

      I spent an hour yesterday with Mass Effect. I'm at the Krogan Breeding Chambers and just got a good talking to by Sovereign.

      I assume i'm getting pretty close to the end, and the closer i get the more i am loving this game!

      Mind you, i'm running through my head which of my hundreds of games to play next now.. lol

        Don't spoil anything for me I only just finished downloading them from Steam last weekend, both 1 and 2. So I've yet to start them. The FF series were my favourite thing too, still yet to finish 6 cuz for some reason my game glitched and I can't get past this one part cuz it's a story-driven and required event and I got no way to progress without doing it.

          Don't worry man, it's been hard enough for me avoiding spoilers for the 2 games, so i'm not about to start spoiling it for others.. My god it is so damn fun though!

          FFVI is my fav FF game so far! If it glitched on you just start again cause it's worth it.

          Currently playing FFVIII and from what you've said about FFXIII, No 8 plays the same except for me pressing X I just Summon in FFVIII. No challenge at all.

          It'll be some time before I start on FFXIII. Damn pile of shame games!

            Speak ill of VIII again and i'll lay the smackdown upon you!

            FF8 = Greater than all

              Loops, I'll give you my final thoughts once I complete the game.
              Currently half way and not overly impressed. Not as bad as FFV but it's one of my least favourites so far...

            I'm just gonna do it ROM style on computer since I did try that theory before, this was currently my third playthrough and I always got stuck on THAT bit. So I consider that cartridge a lost cause. Got it second hand and all

              STop Baggin 8 and 5 argh!

              I go CrAzYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

                Baggin FF V and VIII make Jimu Something something...
                Go crazy?
                Don't mind if I do!
                Blaaaaaaaaaaaaahrrr harg huminahuminaBLARRRRRGH!!!

                Sorry Jimu, I'm still not finding any love for FFVIII. Halfway through the game and I'm saying to myself "Does it get any better than this?"
                Even my wife have said a few times "If you don't like it, just quit and play the next one."

                Tempted but I HAVE to play all 11 FF games (MMO don't count).

                Time will tell...

                  Did you suss out junctioning?

                  Are you the guy that was saying he just summons GFs constantly?

                  I love junctioning, so free to make characters do what I want. I hated 9 when it first happened because of the job system. Love 9 now.

                  I think that's what I liked about 5, you can make your own job by learning different skills and then being a freelancer...

            FF13 is far worse than FF8. With FF8 I really enjoyed the story and the gameplay I enjoy as well.
            If you don't know already, you only control one guy in your party in battle on FF13... ONE! and if that ONE dies, you lose the game. So you cannot control what your teammates cast or who they attack (If you picked a support class like Medic or Synnergist).

            In short, FF8 rules, FF13 sucks. Period!

      I started ME again last night and something occoured to me.

      Alpha Protocol, which I kind of meh'd earlier this year, is very like Mass Effect... only a better RPG.
      The "game" (read: gunplay) sucks... until you bury points into a particular weapon. But it's the mechanics, the intricaies that make it brilliant.
      Think about how much is going on behind the scenes in Alpha Protocol... every conversation or action affects everyone else. Not in a transparent Paragon / Renegade Mass Effect way, but in a more subtle manner. Also, there a no real "wrong" choices in the game, it's open in its linearality.

      Like a lot of Obsidian games, the first level isn't a great seller for the rest of the game... but.

      If ME2 hadn't launched in the same year, earlier in fact, it probably would have done better.

      Like I said, as a shooter... it's not good, but as an RPG, where your choices influence the world around you... it really does that well.
      If it had a little more polish, and hadn't missed its launch date...

        Agreed on Alpha Protocol. I just recently finished it on PC after picking it up cheap on steam and I was actually really impressed. It had some really excellent gameplay ideas and a solid story. It also gave some really interesting choices which didn't fall into the same trap of making you choose if you want to be a good person or a bad person, you were just making choices and dealing with the consequences.

        It wasn't a perfect game by any means, but it did enough right that I'd have welcomed a sequel.

          I too would have welcomed a sequel... but not by Obsidian.
          They've got some great ideas, but there work has always felt... I don't know, unfinished? unifulfilled?

      See, I don't even think it's a beautiful game.

      Yes, the character models were good, or, more particularly, their faces were good. Their legs were polygonal messes, for example. Add on top of this, the environments had generally really boring textures, particularly Pulse. Speaking of Pulse, the hideous, hideous pop-in of creatures as you run around it almost made me cry. Have you heard of LOD reduction Squeenix? Of course not.

      Oh, and there as a tree, that was made up, of a texture, stuck on two polygons (probably 4 tris, but whatever). The trees in GTA Vice City were better than that.

      Anyway, that's my rant on FF13 graphics over.

      Sqeenix are killing me. I really hope versus is a lot better.

    My nominee for dumbass of the year;

    Shane Warne


    has that man learned NOTHING?!

      I actually believe this man is punching above his weight. Pulling Liz Hurley? When you're Shane Warne?

        If Shane Warne tried to pick HIMSELF up, he'd still be pulling above his own weight.

        Hur Hur!

        I think KFC needs to add some more cheese to his new burger...

      Seriously... he had Liz Hurley and went for ANOTHER woman as well? She isn't even good looking :P. I would've stuck to Liz only without question! Shame, Shane Warne, shame!

        He probably already had her on the go... plus he's a dick!

          Darn straight he is! Though if I had a choice of being with any actress I wouldn't pick her, I'd pick one other hands down, especially with recent events that transpired like her becoming single. Though I know an IT and networking nerd like me would have no chance with her but a man could dream still can't he? xD

            I don't care what anyone says... Tia Carrera is the ULTIMATE celebrity fantasy...


              Scarlett Johansson as my number 1. She always looks so delicious and she's amazing! :D

                Scarlett Johansson would take my vote too. She can pull off the girl-next-door look as well as the drop-dead-stunning-beauty look all the the space of five minutes. The missus even fancies her! :D

              Keira Knightly or Natalie Portman (they're really the same girl), both are about a cup size away from perfection.

                Are you kidding???!!!

                Portman blows that stick figure out of the water!

            Her boosems scare me. When I think of those heaving sacs of milk-ducting tanker trucks, all I can think of is how sweaty it must get under them. I wonder how lichen and moss don't take up residence, it must be like the amazon under there. I'm more for the size when they arrive in the room at roughly the same time as the owner, not some 30 minutes earlier.

            I still <3 troy more though. :p

              Hurley has big ones?
              Honestly I seriously never noticed. Perhaps there just big compared to her stick figure body.

            Milla Jovovich does it for me. She's AMAZING! :D

              *Backhands Todd*



              +1 There's something awesomely come-hither about that girl.

      Poor Liz Hurley. Her track record includes Hugh Grant of Hollywood prostitute fame and Shane Warne of... well, Shane Warne fame.

        Just incase you were wondering (because the world could stop spinning if I dont comment) Monica Belluci and Scarlet Johansen are my top picks at the moment.
        When I was younger and they were younger I was totally obsessed with Alyssa Milano and Drew Barrymore.
        When I was younger still it was Pheobe Cates.
        If you want to go further back I guess it was the woman with a bird on her head from He-Man (Tela and Shera never really did it for me).

    Hey Mark,

    Did you ever get my Reader Review that I sent in last week?

      I did and I threw it to the gulls. Who cares about Banjo-Kazooie anymore? I mean REALLY!

        That's strange?

        Because my reader review wasn't even about a game in the first place ;)

    Reach was pretty good on Friday night. In the last game Mark made me his bitch: everytime I respawned he was there to get me with a DMR headshot.

    And his accent is so sexy that I went online the next day and bought tickets for Billy Connolly's Sydney show early next year. :/

      My name is Mark Serrels and I approve of this message.

      As I said in TAY last week... I had no idea what was going on at the end, I think I'm the one who broke Neils Forge World game.

      I throw myself on the mercy of the court and beg forgiveness... also, I plead stupidity.

    Ok guys, this week it happens. This week we fight the good fight. This week we shall rise from the ashes and TAKE DOWN GIZMODO!

    Here's how it goes; Tomorrow, before 10:00 am, I'm going to select an article on Gizmodo and we must all try and comment at the same time on it. The point is to get Seamus to do a trial by fire! :D

    @Mark: We'll be commenting at about 11:00 am, so can you "go to lunch" earlier for effect? If we want to pull this heist, we need full cooperation and trust!

    Also, when commenting, be nice, I don't want to see expletives or crassness. Or just copy paste:
    "Hello Seamus,
    We're holding Mark Serrels hostage. If you want him back, you'll need to get through our trial by fire, and complete it in less than 10 minutes. Videos must be recorded and shown on Gizmodo as proof...
    ... It's vlogging Seamus, but not as we know it.

    The trial goes as follows:
    - You must jailbreak an iPhone with only a toothbrush and a Wi-Fi connection.
    - You must play Desert Bus and not crash for 3 minutes... whilst blindfolded.
    - You must draw a webcomic that gets at least a 50% approval rating (through a poll)
    - Finally, to prove your geekdom, you must recite:
    ☺ The 9 people in the fellowship of the Ring
    ☺ 4 Star Trek fleet commanders
    ☺ 10 God-Awful Game-to-Movie's

    Good Luck,
    Kotaku/Gizmodo Reader"

    Now tell me, who's keen?

      Oh, this is so awesome.

        *grabs ticket number one

        :D awesome

          Argh!! I just realised I'm in hospital on outpatients thing tomorrow :( !!!! That sucks!

        When we discussed possibilities earlier, this is how it went:

        Tad: I specialise in a very specific type of security... gaming-blog security.

        Seamus: You mean, Kotaku?

        This conversations was promptly followed by two BWONGS:

        I'm in, confirm that that's Sydney time though... whcih makes it 10:30 Adelaide?

      I'm game, time zones may mess up the timing though.

      Hell yeah. I may need to set an alarm though. I'll probably miss it. D:

      I'm not gonna lie - a little bit of wee came out.

      So, that would 10am real time then? Sounds like fun, but who's going to do the kidnapping? :P

      Oh, and you do realise that you've given Seamus a heads-up now, and he'll be able to study?

        Seamus is so busy these days doing his hair and make-up for his almost daily Sunrise/Today Tonight/7pm appearances these days that he come become the next keyboard-cat meme and not even notice.

          Hehee, I think he needs to spend even more time on that, I saw him on Sunrise once and he looked like he'd just rolled out of bed, clothes and all. His hair was doing amusing sticky-uppy things.

      Definitely, if I wake up in time.

      YES! AHAHAHAHA Power!

      *cough* I mean, yeah, sounds like fun.

      I'll try to make it!

        Don't you dawdle now!
        See what I did there?
        Because, like, to "dawdle" is...

      I just read this at 1120 Bristime on Tuesday...bum!

        Yeah I just saw this now too, was too busy driving to relatives :(

        What was the outcome? Tell meeeeee!

          Oh wait, nevermind. I'm all caught up now :D

    Sigh.... with talk of pulling above ones weight above, you made me cast my mind back to my first celebrity love.
    Soleil Moon Frye.
    Yup, stupid name, but I had it bad for her when I was in primary school. Oh, btw for those not in my world, she was none other than Punky Brewster. Yeah, she was odd, colourful and a little fruity, but she made my heart a flutter... :D

    Then she grew up, and I was sad. What the hell happened????

    Anyways, what is everyone elses first celebrity loves???

    *I still <3 troy x 2

      *Backhands Q-bo*



      Still love ya, baby!

        You'll be hearing from my lawyers as my retina's have now been permanently damaged. :p

      Well since i can't remember that far back in life in terms of celebrity loves and watching movies, but I'll say my first had to have been Emma Watson when I first saw her in HP: philosopher's stone. Her smile always made my heart flutter, it still does too, like she's an angel without wings.

        Yes, she is quite a looker, but you've made me feel both old and a pedo in that one post. :/

          Lol sorry Q-Bo, I'm a more younger guy. She's 20 now (I think?) and I'm 22, works perfectly for me :D

            I'm in the same boat as you, Emma Watson *sighs*. As I'm a mere 19, it's not even that creepy.

            Until I watch the earlier movies, and think "you know, I'm still kind of attracted to that, even if her character is a hideous troll". That, I think, is a little exceedingly creepy.

      OH! I wanted to be Punky Brewster so badly. She was made of awesome to me back then.
      My first celebrity crush? Ummm...kinda embarrassing but Eric Weideman from the band 1927.

        OMG, I think I have a new crush/fetish! Strange as Brewster, could things not get any better!!!???

        *I still <3 you troy x3, don't worry...

      I would like to also reiterate that Misty from Pokemon would be SO FETHIN' HOT RIGHT NOW!!

        haha cartoon crushes from childhood (although pokemon wasn't that long ago.. hmm) opens up a whole can of worms..

        Mine was Zia from mysterious cities of gold.. and I've liked girls with dark hair ever since!

        btw don't double check who Misty from pokemon was on google image search with safe search off.. disturbing!

          I had a thing for Kitty Pride in the Xmen, who was ten years my senior at the time.

          I think I may be a few years older than her now...comic book time...screwy.

    been playing the battlefield play4free closed beta, as i said before, i'm not allowed to say anything about it xD

    oh and i'm halfway through halo reach on solo legendary, i want the achievment "a monument to all your sins" just because its name sounds so badass xD, not to mention i'll get about 300 gamerscore :D

      Yeah that one is a real achievement, you really have to work for it.
      If you have not figured it out yet, the plasma pistol is you best friend.

        I spent so long failing at Reach on legendary, until I remembered my Halo:CE strats. Then it became a matter of "Plasma Pistol, switch to DMR, NEXT!" and then a huge fail whenever I fought anything that wasn't about less than three elites.

      Play the game one checkpoint at a time (i.e. don't think too far ahead), and let the AI do some of the heavy lifting (because the AI Spartans cannot be killed). As said above, the Plasma Pistol is your best friend, especially when coupled with a headshot capable weapon. The Needle Rifle is best for Brutes, as the three-shot-kablamo applies to their entire body. Pick up the Drop Shield armour ability whenever possible, as it will restore your health.

        well i feel very proud of myself, because i've been doing exactly what you guys have been saying xD

        and legendary has definently made me see the good side of the drop shield, i used to think it was useless, but it's actually extremely usefull!

    Tis the season to be doing silly things, so I thought I'd give some of you a second chance in case you missed my late post on Friday :0

    Have to go to the doctorb soon for my yearly review.. wish me luck!

      Well, well

      haha fantastic thought! Cheers, mate!

      And good luck! :D

        hehe yer it's a pretty epic tree.. not an easy thing to put together I assure you. Might have actually been quicker to put up my real one and decorate it and take a photo. That took like 3 hours to render on 8cpu's :0 Just wanted to say thanks to all you guys though. As I said in my Friday post, you've all kept me amused at work and home throughout the year, so I just thought I'd send you all a little love in return!

          8 CPUs???? *in Keanu Reave's voice* Whoa...
          Merry Christmas to you too Welbot by the way, just in case I don't get the chance to say it later. :)

      Awww,we ♥ you too, welbot! That's an impressively huge tree. I guess it had to be so you could wrap Loops up to stick under there for Qumulys.

      Good luck for your review! Oh, and Merry Christmas too.

        hmi guess my reply above should have been down here to make more sense.. oh wells! I can just imagine the look on Qumulys' face when he unwraps a chuloopa for xmas :0 It'd be like that kid in that youtube vid with the Nintendo 64 :0 lol

          I'd unwrap him with my tongue. :P
          I wish me some Merry loops ass
          I wish me some merry loops ass
          I wish me some merry loops ass
          And a happy waxed rear.


            The ironic thing is that all i'm wearing is a Nintendo 64 box!

            I don't know why... maybe it's the licking, but that post made me think you're a furry.

    Has anyone here watched the TV show 'An Idiot Abroad'. Went to Air on Sky in the UK earlier this year. It has to be the funniest TV show i have watched in AGES.

    Please tell me i'm not the only one who regularly wets himself while watching this!

      Gary: Tank Commander > all.

      Can I get an Amen mark?

      You're not the only one. I loved every minute of the travels of that strange little man (with a head like a fucking orange).

      Hmmm, not heard of this one, but since you have impeccable taste, I shall look into it. :)

    Alright everyone, it's here, the moment you've all been waiting for (ok, probably no-one has been waiting for this, but still, I'm a little egocentric): The Attempt at a week-long Blaghman styled Choose Your Own Adventure Game! (And the crowd goes wild?)

    As with all of these, I'll be making it up as I go along, attempting to keep the character alive through whatever stupid things you choose to make them do. I haven't quite worked out how I'm going to get this to work with multiple people answering, but I'm sure I'll manage something.

    So, gl, hf, and don't criticise my writing :P.

    As your hand touches the book, a strange sensation washes over you. You can feel the book pulsating with energy, whispering its secrets to you. It all becomes clear now, why your uncle sent you here, with his cryptic message, why everything seemed so empty prior to this moment. You had been searching, looking for this. Now you could gain power, and use it to help -or maybe hinder- the works of all the great humanitarians. You could change the Human race.

    You place your hand on the book, an electric tingling rushes down your spine, but before you grab it, you hear footsteps, walking purposefully in your direction.

    -Uncles Cryptic Message

    -Grab book and subtly attempt to leave.
    -Grab book and bolt.

    -Go towards the person, study/talk
    -Go towards the person, incapacitate/kill

    -PS, it hopefully shouldn't, but this may double post, as Kotaku exploded when I first tried to submit it :/.


        This phrase + TadMod triggers a laugh in me every - single - time.

        You attempt to cast a fireball. Due to your lack of knowledge of spells, all you achieve is making yourself look like an idiot. You then grab the book, turn around, trip over and faceplant into a shelf, where you promptly die.

        Congratulations, you are now a spirit, forced to roam the earth, forever attempting in vain to cast

        -Your hand (seriously, it's see through 'n' shit)


        -Search for love wherever you can, only to find that you will be sad and alone forever (or maybe I'm projecting)

        -Cry yourself to sleep, wondering about what might have been (again, probably just projecting)

      -Go towards the person, incapacitate/kill

      My book! None for you!

      Examine: message

        Examine the message,
        then go towards the person, incapacitate/kill.

        The message, delivered by a hooded man on a crumpled piece of paper reads:
        "In the newer town from Eboracum, on the fifth road down,
        In a room covered all in books, with lovely girls who frown,
        Located near the back of this, with books innocuously,
        Lies what we seek all plaid in black, the object to set us free."

        You leave the book, knowing that you can grab it in a moment. You walk to the end of the row, and move around to the side, using a natural gap in the shelves to observe where you believe the person to be.

        He doesn't look very special, an older man, probably in his fifties, a light amount of greying stubble on his cheeks. Wearing a dark trenchcoat, the top of which partially obscures a tattoo, with a symbol you don't recognise.

        He walks down the row, and stops in front of the book, stopping to briefly touch its spine. He begins to look around, but it's too late.

        You hit him over the back of his head, using the butt of your knife, and he falls to the ground.


        -Grab book and subtly attempt to leave.
        -Grab book and bolt.

        -Kill Person

          Examine Person

            Make sure he's dead

              (I decided to interpret "Make sure he's dead" as "ensure his death" this is the joy of being me, I can just believe that everyone says what I ant them to)

              Examine Person,
              then Kill Person.

              You examine the body. Pulling down his collar, you look at the mark. It appears to be an ouroboros wrapped around the number twelve. Searching in his pockets all you find is two pens, and a cigarette lighter.

              On his index fingers you find a pair of rings. On his left hand, a silver ring, that appears to burn with an inner glow. On his right is a golden ring, that freezes to the touch (yeah, I'm subverting the norms by using opposites that don't make sense...). You grab them both, slipping them into the pockets of your black jeans.

              Knowing that he is a risk you decide to kill the man, so you reach down with your knife, and press it against his throat. Before you have a chance to use its razor sharp edge, he opens his eyes, and delivers a hard fist to your face, knocking you back.

              Conveniently, you now find yourself next to the book, with the man staggering up before you.

              -Grab book and bolt.
              -Prepare to fight.

                Grab book and bolt, preferably setting the library on fire on the way out with the lighter.

                fight, fight, fight....everybody loves a good brawl in a library. It worked in Transformers 2.

                  You decide to grab the book, try to fight the guy, and set fire to the library.

                  You turn, and grab the book, holding it under your left arm. As you do, you grab the next book, turn around quickly, and peg it overarm at the guy. He ducks out of the way, but you run towards him, delivering a rabbit kick to his chest. He flies off, but before he smashes into a nearby shelf, a purple glow surrounds his body, decelerating him.

                  Before he has time to recover, you put down the book (which henceforth shall be referred to as a tome, to avoid confusion), then rip the books of nearby shelves, splaying them open in the process. You reach down with the lighter, and an unholy amount of flame burst out, ripping through the paper. It burns so hot that you drop the lighter in surprise.

                  You grab the tome, as the flames burn higher, smoke beginning to fill the room. You throw your knife towards where you think the man is, and then bolt.

                  As you make your way out the doors, the high pitched whine of the fire alarm behind you, you know there is only a little you can do.

                  -Facade of Library

                  -Go home and study the book
                  -Go and try to find your uncle

    Thanks to Mark, i have been watching this ALL DAY!!

    Probably NSFW...

    God i'm eternally amused!

      Oh My Lord. I Laughed SOOOOOO hard xD

        I love the way that Akon is just smiling the whole way, as though he's just trying to stop from laughing the whole time.

          Nothing on 0:48. Look at Jessica Alba's face.

          I seriously burst into tears with laughter at that point! xD

            Mark Serrels - Patron saint of worktime distractions..

            *Wipes tear from eye*

            This is probably the only thing that can make up for me not having s-


      Put a bag on my head... Still counts!

      I love the Lonely Island.
      And Andy Samberg was in I Love You, Man.

      Lollies! That made me do the boy-piss fountain thing, only it was with coffee, from my nose, back into my mug.

      *keeps drinking

      I started watching while eating and almost choked on my sandwich - my fault, I should've anticipated it after reading 'Lonely Island' and 'I Just Had Sex' in the same line.

      Anyways, Alba's reactions were by far the funniest parts. I had tears in my eyes by the 3rd time I watched, and it sort of makes me feel better after watching MacGruber.

      Oh god... This is what counts for music these days? :'(


        No.. it's what counts for satire...

        I thought it was quite catchy, actually. And i hate top 40 music :P

    I know Strange is a regular around here, but there is another female... who is it?

    You will know why soon enough!

      It's definitely me (I dunno if I even count as a regular yet :/), can't you tell from my obviously feminine name?

        I've already cast you in a female role... are there any others?

        Never mind... all sorted now.

          You can't leave us in suspense now!


            It is in Mark's hands now!!!! I have asked for some assistance in sharing my vision with you all!

            If Mark reads this, check 'editor at Kotaku' for me please.

      FatShady's climbing in your window, and snatching your people up...


        I think that was the one i had in my head? I will use it though. I will see if i can work it in.


        Calling me?

    Hey, question for all you minecraft players out there: If a creeper explodes next to tnt, does it just destroy it or make the tnt explode?

      I believe it blows up the TNT, kind of like having TNT setting off other TNT.
      I guess you could always experiment; go to a storage room in your castle (I'm assuming all Minecraft players have built their own castle at one point), remove all light, stack up some TNT, leave for a while, ???, come back, weep at the massive chunk that has been exploded from your castle, ???, profit!

    Hey all,

    As it is getting closer to Xmas, I thought i'd offer up a small gift to the regular readers. I am sure many of you will get a kick out of this... enjoy and Merry Xmas all!

    This is Back To The Future - Kotaku AU style!

      Holy crap. That's hilariously awesome!

      And I'm Marvin Berry!

      Ho-leeee mofos, that is brilliant.

      Can someone please make a working Mark Serrels' Pants? For some reason, I can just see three tubes with pulsing LED lights all converging on the crotch..

        When i pictured it, two of those flashing tube things were his legs.... the other one?

        I like the notion of channeling lightning into Mark Serrels' Pants.

      Wow and I thought I was bored...
      Nice work Mr Shady

      Haha, nice!

      "Re-elect Mayor Aidan Dullard. Progress is his middle name."

        MadDogMike is the other mayor in the 1955 version and I am kicking myself that I did not include

        "and Dog is his middle name"

        Ah well, plenty of room for improvement.

      Holy shit, this is amazing.

      I am laughing so hard right now.

      Dude.. i... i'm Marty..

      You made me Marty??

      Holy crap... i... i think i'm in love!

      Dude, that is just... so... soo damn epic!

      *swoons some more*

      You must have been REALLY bored. I was wondering what you were up to when you were askin' for ladies lol.

      Kudos, sir... Kudos to you!

        *Said in a really high girly voice*

        Oh Chuloopa, I can't believe you're taking me up to the lake. *swoons*

          *Serenades Blah with The Power of Love*

      Damnit, all I'm getting is a blank page....
      *frowny face is sad

        Thank god I figured it out, silly browser. That was AWESOME!!! I'm so pumped I managed to be Doc, a smart old man, with a strapping young lad as a best friend... Now that I'm officially a Doc, can I perform random surgeries on strangers???

        +539 Kudo Points!

      That is both the greatest... and the most horrifying thing I've ever read on here.


        So this is what it takes to earn a Community Kudos now?
        Well played Mr Bond, well played.

          It is either this or get an MBA. Your choice really.

            I've got a PhD. Does that qualify me? ;)

              Then you will need to change your name to Dr. Batguy

              We will accept nothing less.

            heheh about 2 lines in, i'm thinking to myself.. why do I get the feeling I'm gonna be cast as Biff and get covered in horseshit! lol maybe it was the bio-mechanical implants he got in the second film.. nice work though shady ;) good read!

            *goes looking for the Commando script to "find / replace".

      OMG I'm Chuloopa's grandmother XD

      That... is the most amazing thing I've ever read.

      And it's got my name in it!


      Haven't managed to read all of it yet, but as soon as I saw my name in there that suprised me lol. Looking at this is really pushing me to seek out and watch those movies again, it's been too long since I saw them. Maybe then I'd know who I was casted as xD

      Haha :) Really cool. "Thistler: Oh Mom, there's nothing wrong with calling a boy." I'm the hot one!

      OMG! I'm Chuloopa's Oedipal Mommy! I get to see him in his R M Williams undies! And I get to kiss James Mac! Woah!
      That was so much fun to read Mr. Shady, it made my afternoon yesterday.

      No-one has commented on my two fav jokes in the script. One involves ToddMad :) and the other involves Ralph Wiggum... Anyone see these....?

      Couldn't find me.

      I'm gonna go sit in the corner and have a cry with the other bastards...

        If it makes you feel any better, I'm not in there either!

          A little...

            If it makes you feel any better I'm a girl in it.

            No, wait, that's just amusing because of what I'm like in real life... *sigh*

              No Blaghman it doesn't. even MadTod got to be the dog.

    Hey All!

    Is anyone else part of the DC Universe Online PS3 Beta? I bought Playstation Plus exclusively for it, but problem is it keeps freezing before I can get out of the 1st room... boo.

    Anyway, if anyone else has had/is having the same problem and knows of a solution, plx share. My villain "Jumprope" is ready to take down some heroes...

    Hi there ladies and gents. I have a question I'm hoping you can help me with. I'm heading over to the USA in January to visit some friends, tour around etc and I was going to take the opportunity to buy up a few games for my DS and Wii so I can get them cheaper. My question is whether or not they will work on my consoles that I bought here in Australia. Any help is greatly appreciated, thanks

      The Wii won't because of region locking (bah), but DS games should be fine. The only DS game that I know of that's region locked is Pokemon Black and White, but only on the DSis (and variants), but I guess that's a moot point since it's only out in Japan.

      Wikipedia may be your third friend after the dictionary and Google ;)

      For Wii, the games sold in US game stores will be NTSC version, which mean they won't work on an Aussie-retailed Wii; however, if your DS is the older version and does not have DSiWare, then you may buy the games safely.

      Just remember, Australia is PAL region while the US is NTSC.

    Just realised in 5 weeks' time we'll have the 100th TAY (end of January)!

    And I suppose there's no actual planning for a LAN chat as our Kotaku AU gathering? :\ Mark?

    God, 120+ comments and I just got back home. I feel left out.

    Anyway, here you go:

      What in the hell?

      This instead:

    Is anyone else frustrated that GO! won't be showing the new season of The Inbetweeners until next year sometime?

    I watch too much TV (more than games) and love lots of stuff, but irrespective of other recent British comedies like Black Books, IT Crowd, Peep Show & Spaced (special mention, starring our own Marky-Mark!), Inbetweeners is my favourite of the last couple of years - probably because I can relate to it (which is a scary thought), but I'm starting to suffer withdrawal... what do I do?! D:

      Wear an eyepatch, get a pet bird, and become a pirate?

        Also, cut off your arm...become Admiral Nelson.

          er... thanks for the suggestion guys, I'll try it out and see if it takes my mind off it...


      Black Books is hilarious - it's a pity there's only three seasons :'(
      IT Crowd can be quite funny (especially the boss).
      Spaced is a must if you love Edgar Wright's stuff (he directed Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, Scott Pilgrim), or if you love Simon Pegg / Nick Frost.

        I really like the way British shows are short and finish quickly. I think a lot of American shows start to lose the magic after running too long and often because of the size of a series there are so many filler episodes.

          I think one of the greatest tragedies was the running length of Northern Exposure. That show was hilarious, but after about season 4 it just got silly. In its final season it didn't even have the main character, which was just dumb.


    Oh my god, super meat boy $3.75! URGGGH!

    Im even buying battlefield bad company 2 again on pc ( i already have it on xbox) cause its so cheap!

      yer damn you steam! as if life doesn't suck enough atm without you taunting me~ $600+ of squeenix games for $80 odd.. and I can't even afford to buy super meat boy :|

      HO HO [email protected] HO WHAT A CROCK OF SHIT!

    The Article:


    The Message:
    "Hello Seamus,
    We’re holding Mark Serrels hostage. If you want him back, you’ll need to get through our trial by fire, and complete it in less than 10 minutes. Videos must be recorded and shown on Gizmodo as proof…
    … It’s vlogging Seamus, but not as we know it.

    The trial goes as follows:
    - You must jailbreak an iPhone with only a toothbrush and a Wi-Fi connection.
    - You must play Desert Bus and not crash for 3 minutes… whilst blindfolded.
    - You must draw a webcomic that gets at least a 50% approval rating (through a poll)
    - Finally, to prove your geekdom, you must recite:
    ☺ The 9 people in the fellowship of the Ring
    ☺ 4 Star Trek fleet commanders
    ☺ 10 God-Awful Game-to-Movie’s

    Good Luck,
    Kotaku/Gizmodo Reader"


    The Time:
    10am EST (Sydney Time)


    Good luck and God Speed everybody! Let us hope that this act leads us to a hilarious video of Seamus doing our little trial by fire!


      TaddyMod, you wake up so early! o_o
      Half an hour to go til this glorious moment.

      Somebody misfired 20 mins early.

      GO GO GO!!!

      Do it now!

        I blame the education system and Ronald Reagan. How is it that people are inable to read clocks in the digital age?
        *shakes head in amazement.. until distracted by something shiny

        I bet you it was Seamus, trying to subvert us.

        We should up the stakes. :|

      Umm...what happens if they don't want Sir Serrels back?!
      Do we get to keep him?

      That was some convincing acting from Mark. *applauds*


      I love you all!

      Just looking at the MULTITUDES of comments, I can say KotakAU is the most AWESOME place in the internet!

      Thankyou all for being so damned EPIC! :D :D :D


        It feels like that episode of the Simpsons when Homer kidnaps Monty Burns' son.

          Who took off your gag!?
          Chuloopa, are you responsible for this?!

          Back in your box, Serrels!

          Hopefully we can still be friends and hang out in the basement'n'stuff when this is all over...

          ...actually, this is great fun - I've done nothing but refresh these two pages all morning. :D

            Don't worry, Stockholm Syndrome is on our side.

      I slept in and missed it, damn my inability to manage mornings.

      Good work to everyone who participated though.

      Sorry Tad, work made me... work a lot during the morning and I missed the initial attack on the post

    Ahhh what a great night of SC2 Star Battle I had last night. I think I had my best one yet, I got 4 kills out of 6, and one of them was death me doing a drive by nuking. That's going in my saved replays and won't be leaving there anytime soon xD

      Dude, s it fun? I don't know whether to dl it or not...

        It's really fun, but it does depend on your teammates, and opponents. Now, I'm not very good at it, I can accept that, but there are often people who will run in at the start, overextend themselves, get ganked, and killed, then blame their teammates. You need to be ready to deal with idiots, and also, people who just mass interceptor tech.

          I didn't know another Kotakuer joined the fleet! Look in the previous TAY you'll find my ID and name. Add me! :D

            I only really play it while waiting for friends to come on, so we can do some 2vs or whatever, but sure, be warned though, I really do suck.

              When you have a full party you at least have 4/6 people who can be more organised and not go to their death like those idiots do. I see them a lot too.

              So far I got 1 colleague, he isn't that good either, his friend, and this US guy I made allies with on there and he's really good, the two of us were able to hold our own on a 2v6 fight for about 15 minutes or so, and we took down 2 of them before finally succumbing to their overpowering forces.

        I absolutely love it. It's a lot of fun, being an epic spaceship battle nerd, and the download is pretty darn small, it's just one large map in space pretty much (No sort of obstacles anywhere). I've posted about it before but you can look it up on youtube, just look up SC2 Star Battle. Should be a 26 minute or so video right on top. It'll teach you how to play it and also gives a commentary of the match that the guy played on.

        It's very popular on those servers as well, you can join a game and the counter to begin game starts almost immediately upon joining.

        There is only one downside which may affect others but didn't affect me much, it's only available on US servers not SEA (It may later but it's been out for weeks and it's not in sight). But! It's not as bad as you may think, you can log onto and make a new US account (Apparently we're the only ones that can cross over regions like this) and it's completely free to do. The only cost is a bit of your time getting it all set up.

      You guys really love your Soul Calibre 2... made Soul Calibre 2? Really...?

          Nah man, it's all part of Supreme Commander 2, or from South Carolina... 2... OK, that one was a stretch.

            The only custom map on supreme commander 2 I'd get is one that kills it all with fire! :P

            Happy to see no-one took me seriously!

              We always take you seriously Jimu, can't you tell? :P

    trying to play GT5 while off work with sick child....608MB update!!!! turned PS3 on 20 minutes ago and still downloading, damn living in the bush with only ADSL to keep me online.

      608Mb?!? That's like a freaking expansion pack!

      Kinda makes me glad I don't own a PS3, what with all those mandatory installs and such like.

      Now I just really can't help but wonder.... what did Polyphony do during those 5 years?

    So is there anyway I can just use my USB on my xbox? I plug it in (I tried all the ports), nothing happens, it's not detected. Do I have to do something to my USB or download some update from my xbox?

      Try this:
      Has setup instructions plus troubleshooting.

      Really? I can plug any of mine in and they get detected straight away (nothing flashes up to tell you, though).

      Are you trying to save a profile/game saves to it? If so, you need to go into the memory/storage settings and find usb storage - you can either format the whole thing or just select a chunk for xbox stuff.

      Otherwise, I assume it can't read the filesystem...?

        Thanks any way guys, but didn't work. Both my flash drive and my portable hard drive weren't picked up, so I just gave up. My PS3 shall satisfy all my media needs for now.

        Also, are all themes expensive? Are there any good free ones?

          Themes are usually 240 microsoft points each. If you have a lot of xbox friends you'll enjoy it more, because the themes assign different random backgrounds to each of your friends.

          I'm using the ilomilo theme right now, it's too cute... I can't resist!

          Im not a fan of Halo (my son is lol) but the Halo Reach theme was a good freebie. Really pretty backgrounds.

          There was also a winter holidays theme in 2008 that had snowmen and christmas themes that i tend to get out each year.

    Well guys, I'm kinda disappointed, as of me typing this it's 11:45 on Tuesday, and we haven't even hit page two.

    With that in mind, and with yesterday's theme (not really a theme) of youtube videos to do with sex, I would like to present

    The song comes in at 3:25, but the rest is worth it.

      But we are verging on 200 comments... on the first page. That's gotta be some kind of record - last week I remember Loops had the 200th comment on the 3rd page.

      Maybe we're all just trying to be economical. :P

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