Ghost Trick is coming out this Thursday and, as huge fans of the Ace Attorney series, we’re pretty excited. Thanks to THQ we’ve got a DSi XL and five copies of the game to give away.
Ghost Trick has an interesting twist – as the protagonist, you are already dead. The only way in which you can interact with the real world is by possessing inanimate objects. In each level, you arrive four minutes before a victim is about to meet their doom and it is your job to somehow prevent that from happening by manipulating the objects you ‘possess’. It’s an awesome concept, and an excellent game.
Winning is simple – this is one of those fast and furious comps. All you need to do is tell us in the comments below which inanimate object you’d like to come back to life as? For those who like to chuck in multiple entries, that’s fine, but no more than three entries per person please!
Go nuts folks – entries close Wednesday at midnight, and we’ll announce the winners on Thursday when the game is released.
EDIT: Remember we’re a classy bunch – let’s keep it relatively clean, the Hendricks bra one was funny, and Kardashian’s toilet seat was close to the bone, but let’s not take it much further than that! We aren’t GameFAQs!
I would come back to life as Christina Hendricks’ bra. It wouldn’t do a damn thing to save anyone’s life, but I don’t care.
Think of all that weight you would have to support though… you’d get mad cramps.
A burden that I solemnly am willing to bear.
SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP ON A STICK!!!
THIS IS AWESOMEEE!!!
This isn’t my entry, i’ll do that later when i’m thinking 😛
On a side note, Chris Hastings (of Dr. McNinja fame), did up a little extra comic based on this game. It was awesome.
http://drmcninja.com/wp-content/uploads/gt-colors.jpg
Before i had never heard of the game, but after this all i could think of was “It may not have ninjas, but i must obtain this game!!”
Best of luck to everyone 🙂
kim kardashians toilet seat… nuff said
More than enough, I think…
Her toilet seat? I’d rather have her shower nozzle, personally. I don’t need to see/hear anything that involves her toilet seat.
A Ukulele thanks! Yay!
Hi Mark,
2 questions… how inanimate, and how clean do our answers have to be?
I don’t think we want to take any darker or farther than Kim Kardashian’s toilet seat!
As soon as I read the details I thought:
“This is going to get bad”.
I scrolled down and saw the Hendricks bra comment and thought:
“Well, that was faster than usual”.
well he did say go nuts…
I’d come back as a Dumpster. I’d just sit there all day and people would feed me, and at night a homeless man can sleep in me. Every so often a woman might go through me to find her wedding ring and sometimes I’ll recieve free mobile phones or empty stolen wallets. Ahh the life of a Dumpster, you don’t have to go anywhere and the world just comes to you…
Watch until the very end, at about 2:50. You may want to rethink that.
http://www.gameinformer.com/b/news/archive/2010/09/17/meet-the-guys-at-irrational.aspx
I’d be a boulder…
Just laying there, in the sun, nice and warm, never getting burnt, all day… doing nothing, it would be great.
Ahhhh yeah, just sittin there relaxin’. Maybe a lizard might come up to say hi and if he’s feeling up to it, he might come and nuzzle into you for the afternoon and share the sun with you.
Just sitting in the sun, watching the time go by…
how about Slash’s (gun ‘n’ roses) guitar…. that would sweet
The tin that holds a cheesecake. I would literally be surrounded be cheesecake, for the rest of my tin-life.
As a Nintendo DSi, obviously. So I can have all those cartridges being slotted into me. It would be like the Matrix, except with games.
“I know Kung Fu… and Bufu, Skill Pins, etc… Pity I can’t use them as I’M A DS. AUGH.”
I would come back as a container of magnetic letters. Think of the fridge pranks!
Also, in keeping with the theme of the comp, I would say:
LOOK OUT HE’S GOT A KNIFE
But I’d just be kidding, it’s a butter knife (it is the fridge in the kitchen after all)
I would also come back as the suitcase from Pulp Fiction. It’s pretty obvious why.
Jessica Alba’s mirror. I would NEVER get sick of seeing her naked.
But she might practice lines in front of you, for hours on end, and that would just be nightmarish.
ZING!
A club sandwich; delicious to the end, and capable of granting immense joy.
-Lightsaber. Cut people up!
-Aeroplane. “We have some unexplained turbulence…oh yeah, and we’re upside down.”
-The Sun. “Burrrrrp. Oop, didn’t mean to destroy Venus. Sorry.”
Any electronics’s power button – so I can be constantly turned on.
I’d like to be reincarnated as a light bulb so I’d have no shortage of great ideas.
OMG MARK, You’re a legend! I ask for a comp where you can win a DS and you give me one!!!
… oh wait… I still have to win… DAMN! xD
ENTRY 1 – If I could come back as an inanimate object, I’d come back as 2 tins, so I could call myself “tin tin”.
ENTRY 2 – If I could come back as an inanimate object, I’d come back as the sun. I’d totally freak people out when I wake up late one day.
ENTRY 3 – If I could come back as an inanimate object, I’d come back as Nicole Kidman’s face.
Entry 3 is my favourite. I laughed at it even though it’s evil >:D
Mark. I believe in you. You want to give me that DS! xD
Long live MISSILE!
(cutest little doggie in a game yet imo)
I would come back to life as ‘THE Internet’, that’s right THE Internet, everybody loves me and I would get to live on top of Big Ben.
And you’d be wireless and blessed by “The Hawk” himself.
Entry No 1 – Inanimate Carbon Rod
These babies can do anything, they can win “Worker Of The Week” and they can even save you from burning up returning to Earth from Space…
“In Rod We Trust”
🙂
Entry No 2 – Lt. Horatio Caine’s Sunglasses
You all wish you thought of it…
*puts on glasses*
I can feel your glare!
YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
I got that one in one minute before you did :p
Entry No 3 – Red Swingline Stapler
Everyone wants one of these babies, and it would be awesome to hear those sweet words…
“Excuse me, but I believe you have my stapler”
They would be talking about me! plus I’d be helpful in making sure those TPS reports had a cover sheet!
http://www.thecouchsessions.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/milton-office-space-stapler.jpg
Yeah…. but then I’d need you to come in on Saturday. That’d be great.
I’d come back as the heat sink on a 20GB xbox 360.
What I’ve seen on tabloid ghost investigations shows implies that “ghosts” use ambient heat to create phenomena – so I would combine a limitless ability to cool my owners’ CPU/GPU with paranormal powers capable of CRACKING THE MOON
The 11th Doctors Sonic Screwdriver
You got screwed at xmas!
a swiss army knife, not only can i then live in the great outdoors, cut nails, burn ants, chop wood, open wine, open beers, scale fish, poke stuff, cut stuff, grab stuff, clean teeth, file stuff, hook things and screw stuff… but if i get into the hands of a mugger/robber/vietnam war veteran, i get to stab stuff!!!
International Space Station. Not only do you get wicked views you also get to meet interesting people and learn new languages… like Russian, and American.
An action figure, then you could basically do everything a regular person can do.
Well, almost.
I’d be a roof mounted smoke alarm.
On hand you get to be extremely useful, watching over the inhabitants of your house and potentially saving their lives.
But on the other hand you get to be hilariously inconvenient. Run out of batteries just before bed and beep away all through the night. Or even better, start beeping when they’ve gone away for a few weeks and drive the neighbours crazy instead.
Bip!
Bip!
Bip!
Bip!
Priceless.
I’d come back as the Eifel Tower.
While I’d be happy to just sit there and be around for hundreds of years and be taken care of as a national treasure, if I could become animate I’d love to go for a walk, because if there’s any place that deserves a Godzilla-style rampage, it’s the Ciy of Lights, or the nest of the surrender monkeys.
I’d have to be a toaster just because Ghost Busters showed me what an awesome dancing, toast ejecting mean machine I could be. Imagine what I could do with four slots as oppose to their measly two. I’d be more popular at parties than as a human. 🙂
and you could do this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jN7YJRNhsYA
Lol! But it can’t dance or take out eyes with a precision muffin shot from over 3 kilometres away. 🙁
I’ve always wanted to help fight crime….
*puts on glasses*
…so I’d come back as a pair of sunglasses.
FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! you beat me by a minute!!!
Your entry wasn’t there when I typed my up!!!!
LAWL
I’d like to return as a kick-ass statue of myself striking a heroic pose.
1) I would come back as a rock. That way people could get stuck between me and a hard place.
2) I would come back as a shovel. So I could continue to help those affected by the QLD floods.
A Passenger Train – get to observe life of others.
Idea #2 – Flux Capacitor.
I would come back as a BOOMBOX!
Because a boombox can change the world !!
ROFL!!!! Kotaku must be filled with Boiled Goose for this to come out! :p
Well played… been listening to them today and that is one of my favourite songs from the album!
Jocelyn Wildenstein
or a Kaiyodo Woody doll with the alternate face plate.
http://www.ioffer.com/img/item/160/457/525/xAWSJkWVhp2K9eu.jpg
For those unaware.
Idea #3: Etch-A-Sketch, so I could leave messages or pictures for people.
Posh Spice.
Simple. Christmas lights. Here’s why:
1. I get a almost a whole year to plan my evil actions.
2. On one glorious night each year, I will be removed from the decorations box, only to tangle myself in the process. I get to watch and laugh as helpless, frustrated victims try to untangle me.
3. Until I get put away again I will be sparkly and magical, making the people forget all about my evil nature…setting up the perfect trap for next year. MWAHAHAHA
The wall clock – that would screw with a persons day… 10 minutes forward, 10 minutes back, maybe make them think they overslept by two hours.
On a side note my best man did that to me on my wedding day. Put my watch (we had those in 93) forward an hour while I was in the shower.
Bill Gate’s PC, see how he likes it when I BSOD and corrupt his 1000 page word doc.
I think he’s probably smart enough to use Linux….
I think hes rich enough to buy a new PC.
come back and posses a telephone!
I want to come back as the giant gundam statue in Japan. Knowing my luck, though, I’ll be the orange knock-off in China. 😉
I think it’d be cool to be a block of ice.
I would be a PS3\Xbox or PC, that why I could sit around and just play games all the time, no work, all play
Until I get you to calculate pi to 13 millionth decimal number 😛
id come back as a fireplace mot hard to light my fire and heat things up.
What inanimate object would I like to come back to life as?
My brain 😛
An inanimate object I wouldn’t like to be is Mark Serrel’s pants, I’d be so lonely, never being worn *sob* 🙁
Either a crate, a a very shiny sparkly crate, or a very-tall-pile-of-hats-on-top-of-a-top-hat-on-top-of-some-cheese that was found in a crate.
I would return as a robot, to be able to survive the Zombie Apocalypse, should it ever come. >__>
Just come back as a scarecrow. They don’t have brains.
Or Paris Hilton.
I’d come back as money, a coin or a note. Just imagine all the people places you’d see!
Or a book. You could still share human emotions and make people happy or sad.
A fridge, that way all my beers are cold
They’d be cold, and they would be ever-so close, but you’d never be able to drink them.
Welcome to hell!!
…oh cock…
A mirror at the Playboy mansion.
Would possess a inanimate carbon rod, winning employee of the month and be able to smash Race Banyons pretty face in
I’d be my PS3 racing wheel. I’d spend my days being jerked around and being the target of vitriolic abuse.
Its basically like my life now except that I’d be a wheel
Entry 1
An autographed photo of Elly
http://i56.tinypic.com/20pq8j.jpg
Entry 2
MARKS PANTS!
Entry 3
A bucket. I think that as my job is to stop people from dying, when they try to kick me i’ll just move out of the way!. Problem solved.
Entry 3 is …AWESOME!!!
I like being a Smart Phone. I just sit here in her handbag waiting for the chance to talk to her. Sometimes it gets dark and lonely, but I make friends with the other items in there.
Well hey there Tampons! I got an item in my calendar that says you’re going on a trip next week! I like it when the tampons go on holidays, she tends to talk to me more. Laying out all her issues. I’m a real good listener, but sometimes I like to talk.
RING RING!
“Hello?”
Well hey there Owner! Wanna play some Angry Birds?
I love it when she plays Angry Birds on me.
Slide, Flick, Slide, Flick.
It sends chills up my AmoLEDs…
When she puts me back the bag I don’t mind… I know I’ll be by her at night, waiting to wake her up when she wants me to. Sometimes I wake her up just a little too early so she’ll touch me and remind me I’m important.
Here’s my entry:
A garden gnome – you get to sit in the garden and do nothing all day but scare the pets and neighbours.
I would return as a bronze or marble nude statue of myself. Sure people would still be disgusted with my body but they can’t deny that it is art this time round.
(This is actually Dean Manda’s fiancee posting but facebook won’t let me sign out)
A toy butterfly, No one ever suspects the butterfly.
Do you have any idea how many hurricains those sneaky buggers have caused?
I’d come back as one of the DSi XL’s someone wins in this comp. The thought of someone winning me is weird and exciting… if not slightly arousing!
Withdrawn. I’d come back as my computer exactly 10 minutes ago so I could die before that was posted.
And now we know Kirbs… and it’s on the Internet.
I’ll be an AR Drone, I’ll be able to fly around, scaring the crap out of people…..until my batteries run out. Heck I can even be customised as well, think of all the possibilities.
I would come back as a SNES…Just becuase.
A pillow, they can be warm and cuddly when you need them whilst still remaining cool on the flipside.
More like a Mark Serrels body pillow, amirite?
Loved (and boy, I do mean LOVED) by thousands of people across Australia!
1) A powerful gaming computer, then my life would be able to continue pretty much without missing a beat.
Sure, I wouldn’t be able to do any more handheld or console gaming anymore (without the evil evil emulators), but otherwise I’d be fine.
2) A webcam. I wouldn’t even mind if people knew I was there possessing the camera, because I might get a few exhibitionists, and I’d get to listen in and watch people’s conversations on stuff like Skype.
3) A diary/journal. Because then I might finally understand what girls want.
I’ll come back as Richard B. Riddick’s goggles.
With tonnes of broken necks and loads of witty one-liners to witness, it’s bound to be an entertaining ride.
And if Riddick even shows a hint of the crappy ‘good guy’ nonsense, I’ll blind the hell out of him…(or show him porno in the middle of a fight)
1st Entry – I would come back to life as the DSi XL and copy of Ghost Trick mentioned in this competition.
That way, even if this entry doesn’t win I’ll still be able to play the game by playing with myself…
wait… what?
2nd Entry – I would come back to life as a GIANT ShamWow, able to soak up all the flood water in QLD. And if there are any more droughts or bush fires I’ll squeeze out the necessary amounts of water as needed.
Just doing my part to save Australia from those horrible natural disasters.
3rd Entry – I would come back to life as Dom Cobb’s totem (the metal spinning top) from the film Inception.
Will I keep spinning at the end of the movie? Or will I stop?
I will single handedly have the power to shut up the arguing horde of Inception fans unable to see that Christopher Nolan wanted the ending to be ambiguous with no real answer except for our own interpretations.
Awww damn! I didn’t even see Kirby’s entry when I posted mine…
Kirby
January 17, 2011 at 4:17 PM
I’d come back as one of the DSi XL’s someone wins in this comp. The thought of someone winning me is weird and exciting… if not slightly arousing
._.
A piece of the SSV Normandy’s wreckage. Go see the universe.
I’ll come back as Shigeru Miyamoto’s left cheek mole. That way I can see how the great man works.
If he dares make a crappy game I’ll start sprouting some mole hairs.
I’d be a Gavel. “FOR GREAT JUSTICE!!”
I swimming pool! Cos then I’d make ALL the ladies wet! 😉
Skynet, nuff said
I’d be a Ukulele, nothing like being on a Hawaiian beach being strummed at the neck…oh wait that’s bad.
I’d come back as anything that would fit into the line “Oh if this *blank* could talk..”
Not only does that line imply that the object has seen a lot of exciting stuff in its life, but I could also reply and really freak them out.
Just realised there is another Joel entering.. I’m a different Joel lol
😛 hehe
I’m sure they can see our different email and IP addresses though. How awkward would it be if a “Joel” was announced as a winner but we didn’t know which one it was…
A garbage bag!
1. Meeting other people reincarnated as inanimate objects, because chances are, they’re going to be thrown out eventually.
2. Versatility: For example, the choice water-proof wear for poor university students at music festivals. Also heartily endorsed by Dexter Morgan, for wrapping up all those pesky dismembered limbs. Or, in the hands of MacGuyver, when combined with bamboo, duct tape, and an engine, an integral part of an improvised ultralight aircraft.
3. Apparently they take 500 years to break down. I WOULD BE IMMORTAL. Kind of. Not really.
chuck noris’ beard
Come back as the R18+ petition so that I can haunt all members of the parliament until they take me seriously.
The Impala from ‘Supernatural’.
One of Bayonetta’s guns.
I’d come back as a time travelling Delorian so I could go back and prevent my own death from occurring in the 1st place.
A kotaku competition in which you don’t have to draw or Photoshop, as everyone would love me and want to comment on my post trying, but due to the bajillion entries probably have no chance
I would be a glass. Every day would be unique and interesting with different things poured in me or, me been used for different purposes. It would be interesting to say the least- I could for example be someones favorite glass- or one which is used to save them from a life of intoxication- I could be anything- and thats what makes a glass that more fun.
Entry No 1 – A TV so I always have people watching me
Entry No 2 – A PC if something is getting a bit old I can always upgrade
Entry No 3 – A DSi XL So I could have Ghost Trick played on me
😀
A PS3 Controller.
I’d be too hard to resist. Men wouldn’t be able to keep their fingers off my artifically smooth curves. Indeed, they’d gently exert pressure on my shoulder buttons until I’d shoot the gun. I’ve even found myself in the hands of many admirers, ranging from Japanese salarymen to Italian prime ministers and Aussie video game journalists.
One could say that I find myself going in ‘O’s through endless love /\s, turning them into ‘[]s’ with countless Xs and Os just like those pics of Elly?!
But I just want to be loved.
So the next time you’re at home with some friends, remember to pass me around so that everyone gets a turn 😉
1: i would be my cats collar, just so i can see what it gets up too when i’m gone…
2: i would be an air horn, and scare the shit out of whoever passes me
3: i would be a stereo, and make sure that no crap music is played on me, so that when the person goes to play their new justin bieber CD, the cd would melt, and i’d shoot the boiling melted cd at their face permanently scolding their face with the words “i like crap music” or something like that…
The asteroid that is responsible for mankind’s extinction. That way, I will escape justice for killing billions of people and still be around to tell the tale.
Daigo Umehara’s arcade stick, if I was to be poked, pressed and massaged by anyone it might as well be the beast himself – plus I get to be a part of his winning ways!
entry 1. A Big Red Button with the words on it “Do Not Press” and, when pressed (because people just wouldn’t be able to resist), I’d do NOTHING!
entry 2. A pair of goggles, that would also do nothing.
1) Converse shoes- so i can be worn and torn for my wearer 😀 providing comfort in all weathers.
2) Drinking Water- always there to quench someone’s thirst.
3) A little kid’s favourite/lucky toy- just seeing them grow up will make me cry D:
IBM’s super computer Watson… “Chicks Dig Me”
I’d come back as a corpse… That would almost make me a zombie.
Or maybe a complete piece of T-Rex DNA, so I can be found and cloned by a scientist and have the satisfaction of bringing T-Rexes back to the world 😀
I wouldn’t mind been a lego brick- imagine- always part of something new and exciting. One minute a space ship, the next a hot-dog stand.
All I can think of is “You’re an inanimate fucking object!” from In Bruges.
I would want to come back as a mirror (hopefully belonging to someone good looking) – just so I can try to distort whatever I reflect and mess with people 😀
I’d come back as a white tanktop. A 22 year old douche bag would find their way into YD and purchase me, then every time he’d wear me I’d be helping the world how awesome and unique his tattoos make him.
Sure his sarcastic haircut helps the world see that already, but my mad tattoo showing skills would be the cherry on top of the cupcake.
Woo, awesome, awesome comp! Much love for Phoenix, so really excited bout this one too 😀 So many new names pop up though when it’s comp time – damn you for making the competition… competitive!
Alrighty, 3 entries, lemme see…
1 – Roller coaster. No queues or admission fees for life 😀
2 – Jessica Chobot’s PSP
I’ll think some more on the third one…
Jessica who?
You knowww! And if you really don’t, Google is your friend. I really didn’t want to enter dirty stuffs, but it seemed so obvious!
http://www.oneangryman.com/ken/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/jessica-chobot-licking-psp.jpg
She works for IGN now…
Think better looking Olivia Munn.
I would come back as a teddy bear, and I would do all sorts of stuff while nobody is around. >:D
A Lithium battery – So the 3DS can harden up and last longer than a measely 5 odd hours.
SOFT !
TV Remote
So I could find weird and wonderful places to hide from my owner.
I’d like to see my video camera back to life so it can film continously without battery loss 😛
Legislation for R18 Classification in Australia
or Elly’s mouse…… 😀
Lol.
With my two precious kiddies, I think I could only come back again as their daddy. 🙂 But with mouth seeking sock cannon arms.
A shoe horn
We have a winner.
The Grav Hammer on the wall at Bungie.
entry 1: I would come back as a wii. the butt and point of so many jokes.
entry 2: google’s database. having complete access to the sum of mans knowledge with a mere thought and imagine all the pranks.
entry 3: finally an interstellar probe (voyager 1, voyager2, or new horizons) imagine the sights you would have seen and are yet to see and being on of the first man made object to explore outside our solar system. just awesome!
A crowbar – because if games have taught me anything, it’s that only badasses use crowbars.
I’d come back as an ice cream truck and continuously circle a a busy gym before finally parking in front of a Weight Watchers centre… just because I can.
I would come back as the millennium Falcon. I could make the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs and I would get to hang out with Han and Chewie and go on all sorts of crazy adventures! It would be great!
I’d possess Steve Job’s Dell.
I would want to come as an ASIMO, robot with a soul baby, check it out
Bobby Kotick’s wallet, I wanna see what it’s like to get smushed between an ass and a wad of stripper money.
He’s Commander Sheppard… and this is one of the better posts on The Citadel.
A stripper pole. I like lending a hand to the ladies, and this seemed like more fun than a coat getting tossed on a wet puddle.
As opposed to all them dry puddles, right? 😛
…I guess that means I’d come back as a dry puddle. I’m not sure why, exactly. But I guess I could freak a few people out and make them start questioning the universe.
1. A wedding ring- so i can make the bride smile with my sparkles and piss off the groom and his wallet with my cost.
2. Kinect- so i can laugh my ass of everyday watching people make asses of themselves playing motion sports and maybe get slightly aroused as i’m hacked endlessly by computer geniuses.
3. Videogame manual- so i can easily lose weight as game publishers reduce my size for the ‘environment’ and become nothing but a piece of paper with words scribbled on.
a toothbrush , that way anyone who has bad breath could be saved via my awesome tongue cleaning abilities and plaque fighting action , I would be the most feared inanimate object on the face of the planet
You want me to come back as an Inanimate object?
…Inanimate referring to something with no life?
…I’d pick myself.
…:(
the ASIMO in the year 2065, by then it could be entirely functional, reliable and anatomically correct and likely have the designation T-1000
The DeLorean.
I’d come back as:
1. Duct tape – multifunctional and can hold the universe together
2. A block of titanium – solid and dependable…not like that cheap aluminium
3. The electrodriver gun from painkiller – how awesome would it be to be able to shoot shuriken and lightning!
My friend has got a new set of speakers on a wall, that make everything sound awesome. So I’d like to come back as a pair of speakers. Preferably, a well hung pair of speakers.
I wouldn’t mind being a lawn mower. At least I’d get to munch on grass once a week.
Inanimate object eh, in that case, i’d come back as Nicole Kidman’s face
didn’t someone already do that one???
Apparantly I am logged in as Samuel Webster? I don’t know who that is.
I would become the Kotaku website. Then all of these other entries would mysteriously disappear leaving only mine and perhaps 4 others of lesser quality. Apply below!
A beehive.
My own coffin. That’d be a mad funeral (party).
An Analog Clock – because time flies when I’m having fun…screwing around with you! …heeheehee…
Think about it. If you wanted to, you could really stuff someone up with this. Make them late for work – every day. Ring your alarm to wake them up in the wee hours of the morning (ghosts don’t need sleep 😉 All those appointments they hate are only a few minutes away. Or hey, just scare them a bit by twirling your pointers around and around. There is so much fun to be had when your an evil prick who’s possesed a clock!
1 – A Bugati Veyron. Though I probably wouldn’t be as spooky a haunter as Christine. Think more souped-up Herbie.
2 – A simple biro. Think of the fun when someone tries to write something and sees something else altogether being written before their eyes! Until you get put in a pencilcase or lost in a drawer for eternity 🙁
3 – TV remote. There will be no more arguments; we’re all watching (or playing) what I want. Win.
I’d possess Kotaku’s servers, so I could erase all entries but my own~!
…though I guess I’d be dead, so winning might be a bit pointless…
I would come back as Shane Warne’s mobile phone. No explanation needed.
I would also come back as the original THQ logo and demand I stay!
Mel Gibson’s phone so I can feel the fury when I get thrown in someone’s face.
I’d come back as a trampoline – because come on – they’re awesome.
Monitor – I would get to see everything someone is doing all the time! And if they one of the cool screen savers I would never get bored!
A Telstra Shop employee….
I’d come back as Super Marios Movie, Lets face it if I’m to scare people for answers is there anything worse?
A photographer for Playboy’s Camera – Great view, ’nuff said really.
Second: A monster truck tyre. There’s nothing like feeling the air on my rubber before smashing down on a hapless jalopy and reducing it to a fine metallic paste.
A videogame controller. Be the instrument of people’s pleasure… in a clean way!
I would like to come back to life as one of the three following:
1. A rock – To beat scissors
2. A piece of paper – To beat rock
3. A pair of scissors – To beat paper
A red and white 1958 Plymouth Fury, named Christine. Even though I’d be an inanimate object I’d be able to strike fear into people’s hearts.
I would come bsck as a magic eight ball that way I can randomly affect life decision of 12 years old and those stupid people who believe in the love calculators for your mobile phone
A Fridge, mainly because I am the one kitchen appliance every house needs and will always feel loved
I’m gonna be sappy for a moment here. If I died and could come back as any inanimate object, I would be the Yoshi Plushie that I gave to my partner for Christmas, that way I could stay close to her. =)
I would come back as glaDOS, because BWAAhaahaahaaHAaaa haa aha (sorry, got distracted by my brilliantly evi -ah, pleasant plans). Ahahh. I hope none of you are planning on coming back as Weighted Companion Cubes™. *Snicker*.
Caek.
1. A Chuck Norris Figurine – Even at a 1:12 ratio, 1/12th of Chuck Norris has got to be a good thing.
2. Professor Layton Action Figure “Critical Thinking is the Key to Success” ’nuff said
3. A Ouija Board – To send the message, and in the creapiest possible way, nothing says run like “Boo!”
I’d be a Caps lock key…returning to haunt Eric Schmidt for vengeance
I’d be a mega pump…to bring all that excess water in Queensland to drought ridden Perth!
A slap chop. Because I love salad, but I hate making it.
I’d be a humble radish…to claim my Guiness Book Record Certificate. (http://www.gizmodo.com.au/2011/01/humble-radish-survives-30-minutes-in-the-vacuum-of-space/)
I’d come back as a floppy disk.
or a bicycle since I can’t stand on my own and two tired :3
I’d come back to life as a coffin. The same coffin my corpse is in.
I’d come back as Steve Jobs heart. I should not have to explain why
You’re actually playing as the soul of a dead cat, tricked into thinking you’re Sissel.
i would like to come back as a piece of fruit, so when i get eaten, i will be able to explore the human body, and experience the best ride no human can ever have, and then finally get shot out into a toilet, where i will be sent to live with the underground people.
an alarm clock. this is to get retribution for all those times people annoyingly wake me up.
I’d be a DS stylus to have a chance to play Ghost Trick (I never win comps)
I’d return to this world as John Romero’s mullet.
I’d like to be an easily upgradable pc. With each upgrade I would work my way closer to sentience and skynet like domination of the world. Although I wouldn’t be inanimate then. I’d be badass though.
I’d want to come back to life as either;
Weighted Companion Cube – I will never threaten to stab you and in fact I cannot speak. However in the event that I do speak… do not disregard my advice… 🙂
Snake’s Cardboard Box – I am the cutting edge of stealth technology, able to fool terrorists, cyborg assassins and even super soldiers with mind controlling powers.
Well I see someone ninja’d my first idea of that giant Gundam, so on to plan B:
The Weighted Companion Cube – garnering the unconditional love and affection of an intelligent young lass with severe emotional co-dependence (yet all the while remaining silent and obedient – that’ll appease the misogynists :p) until called upon to [appear to] nobly sacrifice myself that the damsel may yet survive, sound in the secretive knowledge and understanding of not only my own imperviousness to the searing flames of the Emergency Intelligence Incinerator, but also that I shall be remunerated with cake! And to those who reply “you cannot eat cake, for it is delicious and moist and you have no digestive tract because you are merely a glorified box and thus suffer a distinct lack of the requisite orifices!”…
…well, you’re just not thinking with portals now are you? 😉
1) The Large Hadron Collider
I have always wondered what it feels like to have beams of lead nuclei whizzing inside you at 99.999997% of the speed of light
2) An X-15. Mach 7. Enough said
3)Bullet from Barrett .50 Cal operated by a Marine in Iraq.
A feather, so I can travel the world on the wind (entering this comp from an inn in rural Vietnam, dedication much?)
A “Big Brother” security camera system. City wide of course. I seeee aaalllllllll.
Entry 1:
A 20 sided dice (D20).
The Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end.
I would be the father of fate.
20 sides spinning unpredictably across polished granite surface, causing all time to stand still in anticipation of my word.
I could not be argued with. I cannot be swayed.
Dispensed by a owner but slave to none.
The fate of lives and entire worlds resting on my whims.
Fear me.
Worship me.
Depend on me.
Place all your hopes on me.
For i am omnipotent.
Oh, almost forgot – Critical hit, bitches!
hehe 😛
The Hattori Hanzo samurai sword from Kill Bill. Because I’d get to cut the top of Lucy Liu’s head.
entry 1. A coffee machine: the power to enslave the populace via their morning zombie-like state
entry 2. The crystal skull: the power to destroy many childhood dreams
entry 3. A laser: so I can say “pewpewpew!”
An inanimate object, you say? As in cold, stiff and lifeless? Sarah Jessica Parker’s acting and/or face. Take your pick.
I’d like to come back as a pair of Sidney Crosby’s hockey skates. Because I’d get to skate all around the US and Canada, take part in the Olympics, kick in some goals, blast ice in the face of goalies such as Martin Brodeur, Ryan Miller and Roberto Luongo and if I’m really lucky get to slit somebody’s throat!
I’d like to come back as a nintendo power glove, because… well, “it’s so bad”.
Simple, the Nintendo Power Glove… “it’s so bad”.
I would be a Cumulous Nimbus cloud modelled in the shape of the kotaku K.
Forever dampening your day with constant showers, after being over looked to win the DS XL.
And just further insult …you may find the contents of said rain a tad…”GOLDEN”.
I’d come back as the Nintendo corporate head office.
A Copy of ghost trick inside a ds. I don’t even need to win the comp at all if that happens!
3 – The Master Sword. Pretty much sums up the desires of all men (or maybe just me) – heroicly-destructive, lady-impressing, and capable of time travel.
I had a weird dream last night that inspired this one, so apparently it’s a genuine, subconsious want.
I’d be a brick.
Why?
I’d at least be useful for many situations, such as the removal of glass from window frames, the removal of many current popular music artists and most importantly, the ability to keep paper where it damn well should be.
I’d come back as the Master for Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull.
I would then ‘accidentally’ set myself on fire.
I a noble and selfless death, for the good of man.
I’d come back as a TV remote control on a mission to save the last dregs of humanity by preventing anyone from changing the channel to any reality tv show!
Ah, the life of a wooden spoon.
People see me as a symbol of losers everywhere. A utensil that represents unremarkable underachievement. When the winners take their shiny silver cup, I’m immediately passed off to the coach of the losing side. Being made to paddle bums as punishment in the lockers. The Australian bid at FIFA, our cricket team and heck, even at the Golden Globes do I seem to be getting around lately.
Mothers even use me as an accessory to assault on their unsuspecting children. But I never asked for my head to be slammed against every living thing in sight. Nor do I enjoy it when wannabe chefs on Channel 10 keep dipping me headfirst into their mysterious concoctions.
Damn the British… They took me too literally :<
Large Hadron Collider. Smashin’ particles, chillin’ with the Swiss, Higgs Bosons all up in my tube, Potentially destroying the universe. What a life.
Or, I’d come back as a copy of Ghost Trick on DS. Expecting just a harmless game cartridge? TRICK! it’s a GHOST!
Id be an aeroplane, living my life flying the skies of the world until i am quietly put away and recycled for other useful thins in society.
I would come back as a meme, passionately loved and hated by all sucked in by my tendrils. It’d be the closest thing to being the next divine prophet… errr… a cult leader without actually being alive or a semi-religious icon. When my tide of fame inevitably fades away I’d be able to dwell forever more in the rosy memories of “do you remember when we thought that s*%t was funny?” Ah, death by nostalgia.
2nd entry:
A Wii HD/Wii2, so that my father, the wii, can finally die in piece and be relieved of the gazillions of shovelware crap that gets released.
Also he suffers from asthma from all the dust gathering on him…Damn you Nintendo…I will be his salvation!
Entry #2: The Earth.
Being an entire planet, you’ll always have something new to watch, which will keep eternity interesting.
In the spirit of the game, you can stop criminals in their tracks by producing perfectly timed tremors, sinkholes or gusts of wind. If you’re too late to stop the crime, no need to worry – simply spin backwards on your axis Superman-style to rewind time and try again!
I’d come back as Nicole Kidman’s face, that’s inanimate right?
I’d come back as the DSi XL and the copy of Ghost Trick that are the prizes for this competition, so even if I lose I can still enjoy the game.
A huge lump of uranium [203]. With a half life of 4.6 billion years, I’d have some time to myself.
The Delorean from Back to the Future.
A bag of Tasty Toobs.
The batmobile.
Bryce Gibbs
snap.
A poncho sombrero combo, as a wise man said once…”no one is unhappy in a poncho”.
A statue of a Buddha because people would always be rubbing my belly and I dig having my belly rubbed.
I would come back and possess a pair of headphones! That way I could mess with people by doing all the clichéd spooky tropes right into their ears.
Plus I’d be able to RickRoll people so good.
Third and finally: The Higgs boson, if they find me it’d lead to ground breaking discoveries in particle physics which could better humanity. If not then at least I can laugh at them. XP
A cake! And this time, it’s no lie…
I would be the world’s first gun, and I would not allow humans to discover or create me.
Know what that means?? It means that Kotaku’s best game of 2010 would be Farmville. Yea that’s right, what a nightmarish world we would be living in.
If I could come back as an inanimate object, I would be a computer. I could pretend to be advance AI and make whoever finds me famous. Not to mention with internet access I can still know what’s happening in the world.
I’d be Stephen Conroy, so I could bring sense & intelligence to a portfolio that is clearly lacking in both..
I want to be a star!
I’d come back as a processor in a top secret government department supercomputer. A real “ghost in the machine” if you will.
I would use my idle processing time to generate plans an top secret instructions to build myself a robotic army under my direct control to wreak my revenge upon the pathetic meatbags of the world!
Muahahahaha!
… ahem. That’s my entry.
A type writer. Not only will I have retro aesthetic appeal, but in said nature of the game I could leave cryptic messages to warn the victims, or simply “It’s a trap!”
Or an Apple product so I could finally understand the unfathomable mystery that is iTunes…
I’d come back a door.
More specifically, the door that houses the developers of this amazing game.
I’d make sure they were all locked in, and not allowed out until they ported game this to the XBOX or PS3 !
Would love to see the the quality in animation and fluidity in HD…but alas, a door doesn’t have any eyes…sob.
I’d take on the form of a tube of liquid paper.
I’d white out certain letters of the title “GHOST TRICK” to the more alluring, more homo-erotic, more bi-curious title of “HOT RICK”.
After all, Japanese males are a bunch of pretty boys, they may actually be more tempted to pick up a copy of this underated game.
Entry #3: A lump of meat.
I’d only be inanimate for a short while, because somebody would inevitably wish upon a star for me to become a real boy. I would then be reanimated as Super Meat Boy!
A chuzzwazzer (the name given to the bullfrogs in the Bart vs Australia Simpsons episode)
I’d be a DSi XL, then I’d have no need for this competition!
I’d come back as an arcade arcade machine. I would just sit there, biding my time, waiting for the right atmosphere and opportune moment to arrive… then BAM! They start me up, and instead of whatever game they expect they get Polybius instead. Their soul now belongs to me.
…yes, arcade arcade machine >_>
Damn strokes.
i would be an electric massager… so i can loosen up those tense moments =P
A Gamegear 2 because my mere existence would mess with alot of people (especially at Nintendo and Sony) and it would signify the return of Sega to the hardware game (the re-released Mega Drive doesn’t count).
Third entry:
I’ll come back as the single analogue nub on the PSP.
Because I’m a rebel,
And the World shall hate me for what I am and what I could be,
And I shall love every bit of it.
2nd entry: I’d come back as a razor that teenage girls will use to try and commit suicide. The twist? I will resist and make their hand slip, so no matter how hard they try, they just can’t get the blade to the right spot.
A towel – Adam Douglas told us you’ve always got to know where yours is, and the easiest way to always know where you towel is is to be a towel!
A crow bar – Extremely durable and versatile, a crow bar will be your friend from crate-opening to zombie crushing.
A refrigerator – Because I like keeping things chilled BD
1) Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man – They’ve got the moves. Plus they can “Attract customers to your business. Make a splash at your next presentation. Keep grandma company. Protect your crops. Confuse your neighbors. African American? Hail a cab. Testify in church. Or just raise the roof” (Family Guy)
2) Rowdy (the dog from Scrubs) – While not being able to move himself he still gets around a fair bit
I’d like to come back as a cupcake wrapped in bacon; simultaneously revered and confounding by all.
I would want to return to possess a Macbook.
Now before anyone laughs at me for my choice of computing device, I use a regular Windows-based PC. There is no need to direct any hate toward me! Put the knives down!
So, you might then ask, why would you prefer to come back to life within a Macbook? Put simply, I don’t fancy the idea of being confined to an office. Even if I was a standard laptop, the likelihood that I would spend my life in briefcases and boardrooms, is a risk that I’m not willing to take.
As a Macbook, I have a much more optimistic future. Apple users are the kind of people who spend their days immersed in the city culture, and I would become a part of that. I’d live in a brightly lit and brightly coloured town-house. And my afternoons would take place in small cafes and popular (but not very well known) coffee shops.
If I was really lucky, I might even be owned by a musician, and be the centrepiece of a band’s live show. If this was my future, I wouldn’t even have to worry about the glowing logo on my back, as the band would tape over it as a display of their anarchic values.
And, the benefits of being a computing device speak for themselves. As a gamer, I obviously would want to come back in a form in which I can play games. And with Steam and the App Store now both up and running on Mac, things aren’t looking so grim for Apple’s computers…
I would also have plenty of opportunity to start making independent games, which I would be able to deploy on a number of platforms. And, since I would have no need for money, my indie games would be pure innovation, as I would not need to account for marketability.
And, of course, the free wi-fi available to me in many cafes will allow me to frequent Kotaku AU, and keep up to date on the latest gaming news.
Alternatively, I would want to be a comfortable, reclining chair.
Reclining in front of the TV all day wouldn’t be so bad. Well, it wouldn’t be so bad as long as the television was left on.
And, I would frequently be given money and snacks. Maybe not intentionally, but the chip crumbs would still be MINE!
I would be happy…
As long as my owners weren’t too heavy, and weren’t fond of reality television.
I’d like to come back as floor stock at a Gerry Harvey backed store – The ultimate inanimate and unmoving object.
Ironically, second choice would be the blaggard’s heart.
I would love to have a dsi xl because all my frends have a Ds and most have that game so when they play i feel left out.
how do i enter the contest to win the dsi xl……?