‘Banking’: Why It’s The Way Of The Future, And Why You Must Do It

Anyone who has ever lived in the same space as another human being or, more specifically, shared a single television with a loved one, understands the situation. A brand new game comes out. You want to play that game. Your partner/sibling/parents want to watch TV. All hell breaks loose. I’m here to tell you I have a solution – and that solution is ‘banking’.

I will now illustrate the practice of banking via a simple example.

MARK’S WIFE: “Gossip Girl! I love Gossip Girl. I’ve just discovered this terrible, terrible show and I want to watch my DVD until Blake Lively’s face is permanently and gruesomely burned onto our Panasonic Plasma!”

MARK: “Gossip Girl. What an interesting concept. This does not sounds like a culmination of Dawson’s Creek/Beverly Hills 90210/The O.C – watching this show seems like a fruitful endeavour which you should engage in. Watch away darling.

Days pass…

More days pass…

MARK’S WIFE: Are you sure you don’t mind me spending another Sunday watching yet another entire season of Gossip Girl? Are you sure?

MARK: Of course not darling. That’s totally fine. You are the love of my life, the song in my heart. I could never forsake you for watching such an engaging piece of modern television.

This, my friends, is called banking. Banking is all about maximising your time, and choosing your moments wisely.

For example – I recently finished Portal 2. This was a game I enjoyed thoroughly. Post-Portal 2 I began scrambling through my backlog, searching for older games I wanted to finish/begin. This was because I have a learned urge to play games constantly, even if I don’t have anything I particularly want to play.

This is a fruitless exercise. You must fight against such instincts.

This period of time is a gaming dead zone. If you are in a situation where you have to share a television, you must choose your moments wisely and bank.

If your husband wants to watch the game, let him watch.

And bank.

If your mother wants to watch Dancing With The Stars, let her watch.

Then bank.

Now that I’ve allowed my wife to spend the last week powering through Gossip Girl marathons, she can do nothing but acquiesce to my demands to play L.A. Noire (or ‘Alien Water’, as she has mistakenly called it) which was released this week.

I have sacrificed one week of playing games for the sake of it and in return have received pure uninterrupted time with a game I’ve truly been anticipating. My wife’s Gossip Girl addiction has allowed me to bank an incredible amount of time. Now she has absolutely no right to ask me to stop playing, no right to even suggest it.

She can’t even give me the silent treatment.

This is banking in action. Banking is the future. You must learn to bank, and bank well. Think about your gaming schedule, time it with releases you truly care about – sacrifice the time you know you don’t need. You must learn to be an efficient, intelligent banking machine.

Happy banking folks.


The Cheapest NBN 1000 Plans

Looking to bump up your internet connection and save a few bucks? Here are the cheapest plans available.

At Kotaku, we independently select and write about stuff we love and think you'll like too. We have affiliate and advertising partnerships, which means we may collect a share of sales or other compensation from the links on this page. BTW – prices are accurate and items in stock at the time of posting.

Comments


84 responses to “‘Banking’: Why It’s The Way Of The Future, And Why You Must Do It”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *