Americans Are The Best Pokemon Video Game Players In The World. We Just Suck At Cards.

Just as the U.S. dominated the medal count at the 2012 Olympic Games in London, our boys brought home the golden Pikachu cup in all three divisions of the 2012 Pokémon World Video Game Championships in Hawaii this weekend. The trading card game? Not so much.

As expected, 2010 and 2011 World Champion Ray Rizzo took the Masters Division competition once again this year, maintaining his status as the greatest Pokémon video game player in the world. I would have preferred a little more drama, but the way this guy plays the only way that would have happened is had the building collapsed, and even then I wouldn't bet against him.

Joining him in the winner's circle are Junior Division World Champion Abram Burrows and Senior Division World Champion Toler Webb, both hailing from the United States. Maybe this is why so many other countries hate us so much.

It certainly couldn't be our performance in the Pokémon Trading Card Game Championships. Japan's Shuto Itagaki, Canada's Chase Moloney and Portugal's Igor Costa walked into the ring and wiped the floor with us, taking the Junior, Senior and Master Championships respectively.

But then those card players won't be the ones showing up as downloadable competitors in Pokémon Black and White 2, now will they? My three U.S. brothers and the runners-up will be immortalised in data for the world to download, play and lose against. We are not worthy.

Interested parties can head over to the official Pokémon World Championships website to see highlight footage from this weekend's big event.


    "Just as the U.S. dominated the medal count at the 2012 Olympic Games in London, our boys ..."


      Once again. . . this is an auxiliary Kotaku site, the name purchased from Gawker media by Allure media with the condition that they post certain articles from the American site. . .

      This sort of article are simply part of that deal. . . This was addressed to the KotakUS users and was posted down here without taking that into consideration. . . it's as simple as that.

        Which is why it shouldn't be happening. For something so simple it shouldn't be hard to do some light edits. Which I believe is normally actually the case.

          Exactly. I mean, this is how Kotaku AU describes itself: "We cover the Australian gaming industry with a team of award-winning local journalists, and localise the best posts from the US, making sure to eliminate what’s irrelevant for Aussies."

    America is so good that it has other countries websites report it for them? Idk lol I want to say Grats to them, but in the same sentence I want to say "A little old aren't you?". But whatever. Looks like they had a blast and that's all that matters.

    Wasn't there a polo throwing issue at a previous pokemon competition?

    Poor kids... they'll be virgins for the rest of their lives.... RIP

    Virginity, I choose you!

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