The Sex, Booze And Hard Partying Of Mass Effect


Saving the world from the Reapers is hard work. That’s why Commander Shepard also made sure to enjoy the finer things in life: booze, sex and partying. Let’s playfully reminisce on the the debauchery of Mass Effect, shall we?

Clubs

We’ve got to start with the night clubs, if only because these are often the source of a good number of the indulgences in Mass Effect — like dancing, watching performers, gambling, drinking and so on. All the videos in this section can be attributed to achlysonyx.

Flux
Location: The Citadel.

Afterlife
Location: Omega.

Dark Star
Location: The Citadel.

Eternity
Location: Illium.

Purgatory
Location: The Citadel.

Personal favourite here would definitely have to be Eternity. What a chill place.


Performers

The first GIF in this article is an Asari dancer from Afterlife, a nightclub on Omega. Did you know the performers have nearly five minutes of dancing? Whoa. Check it out:

Source: leon3525.

Apparently, stripping is a popular profession in Omega?

Source: Hathur99

Either way, that’s not the first time you encounter Asari performers. Back in the first Mass Effect, you could get a private show in Chora’s Den. I never quite understood what the purpose of choosing to sit up or to relax were, though. Shepard looked tense no matter what.

Source: KaineShepard


Drinking

Yes, you can get drunk in Mass Effect. I mean, with all the nightclubs and bars, it only makes sense, right?

Getting drunk at Purgatory lands you on on Aria’s couch…

Source: zevik140

And in the Dark Star, Shepard shows she can (nearly) hold ALL THE LIQUOR by downing the strongest thing every race has to offer.

Source: Creator01

Be careful though, Shepard. Don’t take drinks from racists.

Source: shonagaming

Who could forget the Serrice Ice Brandy with Dr Chakwas?

Source: FluffyNinjaLlama

Or Tali’s “Emergency Induction Port?”

Source: Adam siddiqui


Gambling

Quasar! Remember Quasar? You need to get as close to 20 as possible without going over. There are two types of machines, low stakes and high stakes. You might remember Quasar from a certain mission in Mass Effect which requires you to rig the machines for someone.

Source: agent47crows


Dancing

AWWW YEAAAH.

One of the most amusing aspects of Mass Effect was watching Shepard dance. Shepard isn’t always an expert per se…

So awkward, Shepard. Even the people in the game make fun of Shepard for it.

Source: KarateKidZX

But hey, with some help, Shepard can be a great dancer!

Way to set the mood, Garrus, which brings us to…


Sex

There are no shortage of issues one can bring up when it comes to how Bioware structures romances and sex, but many of us felt investment in the characters nonetheless.

Mass Effect opened with a small number of options: Ashley Williams, Kaiden Alenko, Liara T’Soni. Two humans and one Asari. The second game blew the first game out of the water, romance wise, when it came to options: there is Miranda Lawson, Tali’Zorah, Jack, Jacob Taylor, Garrus Vakarian, Thane Krios and Kelly Chambers. Finally, Mass Effect 3 largely kept the same romance options but also introduced Steve Cortez and Samantha Traynor. Then there’s also Sha’ira, the Asari consort from Mass Effect 1, and Diana Allers, a reporter aboard your ship.

You could sleep with nearly all these characters, typically right before a final battle.

Here’s some of the sex scenes from Mass Effect:

Source: ThatPsychopathGuy

Mass Effect 2 made sexual encounters slightly more interesting by introducing different types of situations and locations. You might, for instance, sleep with someone in a shower.

Source: FluffyNinjaLlamaFluffyNinjaLlama

Saucy. And progressive! Mass Effect 3 was the first game in the series to allow you to pursue same-sex relationships (the Asari don’t count).

Mass Effect 2 also let you awkwardly cuddle with your love interest.

Source: CBMassEffect

…it’s the thought that counts.

All in all, Mass Effect might have been a dark, dramatic adventure — but we can’t say we didn’t have fun along the way too.


It’s Mass Effect Week at Kotaku. All week, we’ll be taking a look back at the last five and a half years of galaxy-saving heroism, cross-species romance and awkward dancing.


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