With Leonardo off on a character-building mission in another country, the remaining turtles are forced to get day jobs. Meanwhile, April O'Neil has made the jump from journalist to ninja archaeologist for hire. Cinema Sins has its hands full with this one.
I purchased 2007's TMNT on Blu-ray, motivated only by blind nostalgia, and look how I am repaid — a portal that spews monsters every 3000 years because of course it does, the same Raph vs. Leonardo story from the first Turtles movie, a cheap-arse twist towards the end and seriously, why the hell is April fighting ninjas?
Maybe the Michael Bay-produced love-action film won't be so bad?