Friends. I have a problem. A Metroid Prime problem.
Can someone stage an intervention?
I need help.
10 Things I Hate About Metroid Prime
I hate the way you look so good
But came out in 2002.
I hate the way the in-game visor
Reflects those eyes so blue.
I hate that you are 16:9
I hate WiiMote controls
I hate the way your world design
Is tighter than Dark Souls.
I hate that 12 years later
There has never been a game
Even remotely like you
I hate your stupid name.
I hate that I’m not playing now
I hate the bloody morph ball
But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you
Not even close, not even a little bit,
Not at all.
Don’t ever leave me.
[Sob]
Comments
35 responses to “10 Things I Hate About Metroid Prime”
He’s finally cracked.
Gif related: http://38.media.tumblr.com/50ecb1c2e452235151a7ec3f22e9676b/tumblr_n7yuonzzih1tfa8pto1_500.gif
I still prefer Super Metroid but I’m not going to go to such effort to explain why.
Me too. I actually couldn’t and still can’t get in to metroid prime…
Did you try playing the Trilogy version with Wii Mote controls? I found it a lot more immersive and less awkward to control than the GameCube version.
I’m the opposite. I wish they did dual anal log controls.
Lol “anal log”.
It’s a barrier & most of the time I hate motion controls on any other day but once I got used to it I found them to be much better than any other FPS I’ve played on a console. Being able to run around & shoot naturally without needing auto aim or assistance is fantastic
The only game I enjoyed motion controls in was Mario Party.
I tried prime 3 twice, they never clicked.
Yeah I did when it came out recently on VC. I wish it had analogue controls to be honest, the graphics combined with the twitchiness of the controllers gave me a head ache.
Super Metroid is one of the greatest games ever made. Yes the game can be a bit short when you know what you are doing, but the game is so good it begs to be played again, this time quicker with more % completed.
I can’t tell if you actually hate the things you say you hate, and I hate it.
… why so serious?
I hate the way the game would only be 2 hours long if you didn’t have to scan every single little object
But you do. You know you do.
I have to say it is great game design because I want to scan them all, even though I hate it when games pull that crap. Turns a normal play through into an OCD filled nightmare that I may have missed that one scan that I could only have gotten and have to restart. The only other games that do that to me are Suikoden with recruiting all 108 stars.
No spoiler walk-throughs are my mental saviour. Doing this currently with Suikoden 1 and my replay of Metroid Prime Trilogy
Metroid Prime without scanning. That’s horrifying.
Wiimote controls in First Person Shooter games are a legitimate control scheme on par with twin-sticks/mouse and keyboard.
This may be the most inflammatory thing I’ve ever posted on here.
Good luck buddy.
Wiimote controls are better than twin stick in every conceivable way. They’re more accurate, have higher speed, and the split controller is more comfortable (rest your pointing arm on your leg and you can game until the batteries go flat).
Your move, everyone else.
Nope, you’re right. Red Steel 2 was the pinnacle of console FPS controls. And then they threw it all away.
I’m still bitter.
Me too buddy, me too!
The way they used the gyro to let you aim off screen was amazing, it gave you 180 degrees of aim to ramp turn speed to a crazy max!
Shooting six locks in 2 seconds… Mmm.
Edit: Were you also super-bummed when shadow warrior never came to the wii u with wiimote controls?
I just hate metroid, in general.
Yep.
Five year old’s question: Why?
What’s normal? Those damn Dawson’s River kids, sleeping in each other’s beds and whatnot?
@markserrels: what about that goddamn boss fight against Ridley toward the end of the game? To this day I have never gotten past him.
EDIT: Ridley, not Ripley. Metroid Prime’s the only Metroid game I actually got that far into so I’m not up on the lore. I just hate that fucking robot dragon thing. 🙁
did you try asking nicely? perhaps saying “would you kindly…” would help.
Fighting Ripley would be a real mindfuck.
I’d say the Omega Pirate was my least favorite boss battle in Prime 1 I must of perished 3 or 4 times before I fully understood how to take him down.
I believe that’s one they deliberately made harder in the PAL release.
My GameCube died a few years ago and I’ve always wanted to play through this game again. I completed probably 12x 100% playthroughs of it. I loved it so much.
Anyone else have the sudden urge to buy Mark a guitar?
Feelgood story of the year.
Metroid Prime, I swear… How you be so good?
I was gonna say, wth is wrong with you, but then I read the whole thing. 😀
Metroid prime has made me contemplate getting a Wii u for a while. Best game I played on the game cube, other than ssbb.