Mario Kart's Dark Secret

Mario is full of darkness. Mario frequently uses Yoshi as a literal stepping stone and allows him to plummet to his own death, he drops Bowser into a pit of molten lava frequently. Like all the time. But perhaps Mario Kart plays host to one of the darkest concepts of all.

Like, I never thought of it this way before. You invite Koopa Troopa to a race — let's put aside our differences for a while and enjoy some go-karting.

But surprise! The weapons you are using are literally the goddamn shell-skeletons of your brothers and sisters, who have probably been jumped upon and murdered by Mario and Luigi. What kind of sick bastard would create such a grotesque, debauched, base racing contest. Utterly brutal.

Mario, you are a terrible human being.


    Small problem, Koopa's don't need the shells to live, they can take them off. They use them as armour.

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