Shout Out To This Poor Assassin's Creed Guy

Shout Out To This Poor Assassin's Creed Guy

In Assassin's Creed Syndicate, there's a guy whose entire job is to stand on a boat and get knocked into a river. That's it. That's his whole life. This man is a hero.

If you're running along in Syndicate's version of London and happen to cross the Thames, you'll probably see this guy. He's all over the place, so if you're on the river, chances are he's nearby. He'll be standing there on the edge of a rowboat, maybe having a cigarette or something.

Shout Out To This Poor Assassin's Creed Guy

Then you'll run past him, since this is an Assassin's Creed game, and it's mostly about running past people.

And this will happen:

Shout Out To This Poor Assassin's Creed Guy

Sploosh! Down he goes, You jog on, focused on whatever thing on your minimap it was that had you running across the Thames to begin with. He goes into the water, clothes and all, and never actually resurfaces.

Does he die? Can he just hold his breath really long? What kind of bacteria are in the Thames, anyway? We will never get answers to these questions.

I salute you, Assassin's Creed Guy Who Falls In The River. You exist entirely for the purpose of a single pratfall; you suffer for our pleasure.

You may not think anyone notices how hard you work, but I do. I notice you.

Shout Out To This Poor Assassin's Creed Guy


    If you look closely, he phases out of existence before hitting the water. Maybe he was never a real person, rather just a glitch in the Animus?

    (I haven't played an AC game since AC2.. The Animus is still a thing, right?)

      Nope it's all VR goggles now.

      I wish I were kidding...

        I'm assuming that was explained away in one line of throw away dialogue..

        Last edited 03/01/16 5:29 pm

          You work for a gaming company from around Black Flag onwards

            As someone who's played the first 2 games this statement makes so little sense it almost sounds like a joke.

              Seriously, I wish it were :(

              They abandoned the Desmond storyline in 3. It then went to complete shit storywise.

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