Today is the day. I know you've been waiting, anticipating.
You slapped your money down early because the demand was so high. What if you arrived day one and they were all sold out?
You couldn't have lived with yourself. That's why you put $15 down on a pre-order on these new Doom branded Cacodemon socks.
Now it's time to collect.
These socks, these glorious socks. May 13 was the original release date, but no — Christmas has come early. Dreams don't adhere to release dates. Your socks, your pre-order socks are now available and it feels so good.
Today is the day. To indulge in the sensation, to drown in that promised luxury. Today is new socks day. That fabric will caress your feet, it will smother your tootsies in a pure pleasure you've never experienced before. This is your moment. Live it. Breathe it. This isn't just a sock. It's a lifestyle choice.
That Cacodemon, that spherical monstrous alien from mars — it will wrap around your shin like a satanic cashmere blanket. It will envelop you. You'll never forget this. In darker days to come, in moments of struggle, you will close your eyes, inhale, and be transported. To this day, this moment, when you laid eyes on your pre-ordered Cacodemon socks for the first time.
Enjoy this. Remember this. Because life is fleeting, but Cacodemon socks are forever.