This Totally Accurate Battle Simulator Is Hilariously Ridiculous

Sorry, I don't care if you caught a Squirkachu on Pokemon GTFO, because the only video game that will matter after today is Totally Accurate Battle Simulator. It pits hilariously brainless putty humanoids in red versus hilariously brainless putty humanoids in blue in the most ridiculous battle sequences.

The two armies are armed with medieval weapons, and then they just storm at each other to see which army will win (and presumably, which weapon is superior). It's like a twisted version of rock, paper, scissors, only way more fun.

Watch the video! It will make you laugh as the red dudes with swords run straight into the blue dudes with shields and lances. Or when they just floppily charge at the other side with no weapons and have a cannon mow them down. The game is stupid simple: you pick your weapons, the other person picks theirs, and then your battle lines run at each other until there's no one left standing. The beauty is in the hilarity. I need to play it right now.

You can sign up for the alpha version of the game made by Landfall here.

Look at how fun a battle can be:


    Sorry, I don’t care if you caught a Squirkachu on Pokemon GTFO,

    Let's sit down and talk about why you hate Pokemon so much.

      "Show me on this Poke Doll where Mr Mime touched you."

        I'm done. You've broken me.

        Boss seemed confused as to why I suddenly laughed so damned loud.

      Having said that, Squirkachu is a great name for a Pokemon.

      "look how cool I am not liking Pokemon. I dislike them so much I can't even name one! "

        Ah yes, it does seem that way. It's amazing how the negative party tries to make so much noise when something becomes popular.

        ...ok, so the game looks fun, but I'm sure Pokemon and the blue and red blobs can live together in harmony.

        I like how careful they were to deliberately get the name wrong, yet incredibly similar to two very well known Pokemon.

    eh, this accurate battle simulator looks fun for about 5 seconds...

    Last edited 14/07/16 6:34 pm

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