Even The Spectre, DC’s Spirit Of Vengeance, Cannot Master Baytor

The Spectre is one of DC Comics’ oldest, most powerful characters. He’s the Wrath of God incarnate and has near-infinite power to deliver holy judgement to those deserving of it. But even he can’t beat the phallic former demon lord who works in a Gotham City bar.

This week’s issue of the Section 8 miniseries Six-Pack and Dog-Welder: Hard-Travelin’ Heroz finds the Spectre on Batman’s turf, looking to deliver cosmic comeuppance to Baytor.

Ever since he appeared in the Hitman series years ago, Baytor’s whole shtick has been that he screams out “I am Baytor!” and almost nothing else. He’s uttered a few random phrases for comedic effect when scenes call for it, like the time he concussed Wonder Woman…

…but eruptions of ejaculatory self-identification are his main mode of expression. You think that would make the Spectre’s job really easy but The Almighty’s Terrible Swift Sword has lost track of what Baytor looks like. The blame is squarely placed on DC Comics’ tendency to reboot things all the time.

Baytor’s superfreak friends in Section 8 try to stop him from screaming out his own name…

..but Baytor can’t control his urges and yelling out who he is chief amongst them.

Desperate to save his friend, ultra-alcoholic team leader Sixpack makes a brave sacrifice and tries to fool the Spectre.

Inspired by Sixpack’s heroism, other Gothamites declare that they too are Baytor.

Yes, Batman too is Baytor.

This comic is great.