No Matter How Bad Rogue One Is, It Can't Be That Bad

Image: Disney

Finally, it's here: Rogue One. The latest film in the Star Wars saga launches this week, and the general consensus so far is that the spin-off hasn't hurt the Star Wars franchise one bit.

Not everyone is in universal agreement about that, though. The New Yorker, for instance, thought it was so awful that it might even be time to abandon the Star Wars franchise entirely. But there's just one thing about their take that might just be a bridge too far.

I don't want to get into the business of slagging off other people's reviews, especially since I haven't seen Rogue One yet. I'll see that probably later next week (good luck to me surviving the spoilers in this business). But while there were plenty of choice passages in the New Yorker's 1000 or so words about the latest Star Wars entry, I just couldn't let this one go.

There’s none of the Shakespearean space politics, enticingly florid dialogue, or experiential thrills of the best of George Lucas’s "Star Wars" entries ("Attack of the Clones" and "Revenge of the Sith").

I mean, Rogue One might not be the second coming. But Revenge of the Sith? Attack of the Clones? That's the best the Star Wars films have to offer?

Yeah, no mate.


Comments

    Oh well someone doesn't like Star Wars, I've heard enough good things about Rogue One that this review isn't going to stop me from seeing it

    For some reason im not 'grabbed' by this one. I will still see it, but unlike movies in the past where I see it asap (e.g. weekend it comes out) I don't feel the urge with this one.

    Keep in mind that Empire Strikes Back wasn't a George Lucas movie. So if we discard Jedi and New Hope (no-one over eight's idea of good movies), it's measuring those two against Star Wars.

      Make that "if we discard Jedi and Phantom Menace"...

      If you don't think New Hope is a good movie, then you have a fundamental misunderstanding of cinema. It's second only to Empire in terms of its critical reception, lauded as the standard of the modern blockbuster, and nails all the right notes of a classic hero epic. In nearly every critical circle, it is second only to The Empire Strikes Back in the entire saga.

      A New Hope was excellent, and it is generally regarded as such. Return of the Jedi was generally well received too, and is my personal favourite in the series. Jedi is also not a Lucas movie, both Empire and it were directed by other people.

    That's actually a really useful review, though. The reviewer is nailing their colours to the mast.

    "What I want in a Star Wars Film," they are saying, "is stuff like Ep 2 and 3. This film is nothing like them, so yar boo sucks to it."

    Whereas what *I* want in a Star Wars film is oh-god-please-not-more-Ep-2-and-3. So, based on this review, I daresay I'll find a lot to like in Rogue One.

      That's a great way to frame it, and mirrors my thoughts exactly.

      If you're using Eps 2 & 3 as the pinnacle of Star Wars, ya dun goofed...

    I don't really like Star Wars. But if they keep putting people like Iko Uwais, Yayan Ruhian, and Donnie Yen in their movies then I'll keep showing up.

      Donnie Yen FTW

    It's bizarre that anybody would use episodes 2 and 3 as examples of the best Star Wars has to offer... perhaps the whole review is a troll? A new strategy to get global clicks through to their paper? Because I suspect it's probably working.

    That said, I do hope it's ok - good even - because I've got a (free!) ticket to see it tomorrow, and I don't want it to be a waste of time. However, I'm not going to partake in that weird Internet exercise of picking and choosing which reviews are "right" and which are "wrong" or even "biased" in order to validate my pre-conceptions...

    lol, " Shakespearean space politics, enticingly florid dialogue, "

    That's the first time I've heard anyone praising George Lucas dialogue.

    Just watch I, Claudius instead and pretend it's in space. It will be a far superior experience.

    The lamentation for "Shakespearean space politics, enticingly florid dialogue" made me think the reviewer had it confused with Star Trek.

      The undiscovered country is the height of ridiculousness thanks to the Shakespeare quoting Klingon General Chang. So ridiculous haha.

    Ummm. What? I'm sure I'm in the minority when I say that Eps 2&3 are in my opinion the worst of the prequel trilogy... Yes, I'm rating Phantom Menace higher than both the other films. I shall take my psychoactive drugs in the study thank you!

    Meanwhile, got midnight screening tickets to see Rogue One tonight!!!

    I have to admit that I'm not particularly hyped for Rogue One. The trailers make it feel like a heist or spy movie that just happened to be Star Wars. It also sort of reminded me of how The Force Awakens felt like it was trying too hard to be a Star Wars movie. I hope that Rogue One is a great film but I can't shake this feeling that it seems to be a by the numbers movie with the Star Wars theme slapped on.

    I've been trying not to hype myself for this, because I tend to get disappointed easily. I was not a fan of Force Awakens when I saw it. It's been hard, since I was in Japan in November and they are hyping the absolute shit out of the movie. But I'm seeing it on Saturday and hopefully its at least good.

    As for the review, if they're serious about liking 2 and 3, then good for them, and if they dont like this one because it's not comparable to something they like, then that's fine. Not saying I agree, but they should be allowed to have their opinion if that's really what it is.

      They're free to have their opinion. Other people are free to have opinions of that opinion. *Shrug*

    If you dont want any spoilers don't read the New Yorker review. But it does read like a circle jerk on how great the critic is at understanding the artform of the media that is film and how Rogue One did not follow those rules.

    *very minor spoiler*

    Just got back from midnight screening with a friend, glad I saw it but not running off to see it a 2nd time like I did for force awakens. It has some very enjoyable scenes and has some nice familiar faces return. However 2 characters return in the form of cgi and me and my mate found it more then a little off putting and unnecessary, to the point it pulls the film down a bit.

    Best scene in one word.....Vader ;)

    Recommend seeing it

    In order to respond to that review, I think we just need to remember one thing:
    Star Wars: Attack of the Clones is the worst thing ever made by a human. Except for the bagpipes.

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