Playing With Conan Exiles' NSFW Character Creation

Before you step completely naked (server settings willing) onto the hot sands of Conan Exiles' barbaric wasteland, there are a few adjustments to be made. Here's a not safe for work trip through the game's NSFW character creation, dick sliders and all.

Before we get into it, know that you don't have to be exposed to wind-swept genitalia and naked breasts to enjoy Funcom's take on the survival game genre. There is a option in the game settings that lets players specify between no, partial or full nudity, with partial nudity putting loincloths on characters but leaving their chests exposed. I imagine the Xbox One release of the game will have that setting removed, though stranger things have happened.

The player character begins their life in the savage wastes as an exile (hence the game title), crucified and left to die in the desert sun. While modesty dictates at least a cloth diaper or fur skirt, in the savage world of Conan the folks doing the exiling often opt for the more practical birthday suit option.

Why waste clothing on a guy who is going to die anyway?

This is where character creation starts. First we select a race. They're a bunch of options, but they're all just different humans with slightly varying origins and looks.

One race in particular stands out, at least among male characters. While most races' default model sport a modest penis, the default Kushite character is swinging for the fences.

I do not know why the Kushite starts with the penis preset set to enormous, but I've played on several different servers and the men of the "Black Kingdom" always start longer. I reached out to developer Funcom to see if they had an explanation, attaching the following GIF as proof.

Possibly the best GIF I have ever made.

There are also plenty of face sliders available to make your survivor man more unique, so it's not just about the whole penis thing. Men even get a fine selection of eye shadow to wear, because being naked doesn't have to mean you're not looking your absolute best.

This is a good look.

On the female side of things we have similar options for face, resulting in a nice variety of different looks.

And where there is a penis-size slider, you know a breast slider isn't far behind. This one features a modest range of sizes, nothing too ridiculous.

Once character creation is complete, your in-game avatar is thrust into the Exiled Lands, where they will have to forage, fight and fortify to survive.

I will say one thing for beginning a survival game with a naked character, it sure adds urgency to learning to craft pants.

Though I am sure there will be many players who prefer to revel in the option to leap through the desert sands in nothing more than the skin they're in.

Fly free, my friends.

Conan Exiles is currently out on PC for Steam Early Access.


Comments

    "First we select a race. They're a bunch of options, but they're all just different humans with slightly varying origins and looks"

    Great explanation of race there.

    P. S. I imagine the sunburn on those dongers would be extreme.

    Are the vagina's as detailed as the dicks are, because they were in Age of Conan until the Helen Lovejoys cried about it

      I'm wondering if they range between tiny crack in the skin to Mooseknuckleville...

        you forgot a few others in there, but im glad you kept it on the classier end of the scale.

        Last edited 02/02/17 10:54 am

    Kinda wish you could choose to be a lady with a penis. Or a dude without one. If you're going to that much trouble in the first place, why not?

      Transgenders in the hyborian age...

      If it was some kind of scaly hypnotic snake penis on a demon witch lady, I suppose that would work, but anything else would just ruin christmas for everyone.

        Take your prejudice and piss off mate.

          I really thing you need to apologise for the prejudice comment there mate. To be fair to the guy, there are precisely 0 examples of trans characters in Conan mythology, more than likely because they didn't have plastic surgeons or knowledge of hormone therapy to make the necessary changes. There's nothing stopping you from strapping a dress to your muscle-bound character and pretending he has a very effeminate voice, but the breasts and a penis combo just wouldn't have happened according to the mythology, not without some curse being involved, hence his response.

            handled like a pro, thank you.

              My dudes, relax! Sorry about offending in regards to lore and all that, just thought it'd be cool. Not really a Conan buff, so I didn't realize it was such a hardcore lore game.

            I agreed with everything he said, until the "That would ruin Christmas for everyone". This came off as quite judgmental to me.

    That last picture actually sold me on this game. I'm imagining an entire playthrough where my character wears all manner of armor up top, but steadfastly refuses to cover his junk with anything. It would make all NPC interaction hilarious.

      Did you ever see the Gaydiator video? (It runs this joke)

    "How do we get the gaming press to notice our mediocre early access survival crafting game among the flood of mediocre early access survival crafting games?"

    "...Dick physics?"

    And it fucking worked.

    I hate this planet.

      I love the cynicism in this comment.
      It reminds me of myself when I was my current age.

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