What's The Worst Character In Mass Effect?

Image: Youtube

If you were to do a quick straw poll and ask everyone what their favourite Mass Effect character was, it's not hard to guess what the top result would be: Garrus. Everyone loves him, most people want to bang him, and he's definitely an asset in any squad.

So to spin things around a bit, let's ask the reverse: what's the worst character in the whole series?

I've already stated my dislike for Miranda, although that's partially down to her personality. As a squad member she's incredibly versatile, although I found Samara was more handy as an all-out biotic specialist and Grunt/Garrus more useful as raw fighters. She does have the complexity of the relationship of her father to go off as well, a depth not all the Mass Effect roster can boast.

But for truly awful characters? There's Morinth, a true psychopath who takes her mother's place in your squad and can even kill Shepherd, if you want to walk down that path. But perhaps the worst crimes are committed by Jacob and Kaidan, both of whom are just boring.

Be a masochist. Set the world on fire. Or be the best friend Shepherd or Ryder has ever had. I don't mind. But whatever you do, don't be dull. That's what makes for the truly worst characters, and it's why Kaidan is my pick for actual worst. (Jacob's equally bad, but at least there's a laugh to be had in how shitty his romantic lines are.)

What's your pick for the worst Mass Effect character in the series?


Comments

    Ashley.

      Nah dawg, she totally bangin'

      Especially by ME3, she really grew on me.

      Worst character is Steeeeeeeeve!

        yeah i felt the same with Ash, didnt think much of her for first 2 games, dug her by the third.

      A lot of the hate directed at Ashley is because she is anti-alien. However, if you go into her backstory you find out a lot of that stems from the fact that her grandfather was crucified over the Battle of Shanxi during the first contact war. Growing up, she would have been exposed to a lot of anti-alien bias as a result of being related to the first human ever to surrender to an alien species, and has probably spent most her life blaming the turians for what happened to her family. Given that sort of background, it's understandable that prior to the exposure to alien races she gains by ME3, her outlook would be decidedly anti-alien.

        and that right there is why the series is awesome. so much back story fleshing out characters and giving them solid reasons for their actions and personalities.

    i played male shep through the trilogy and killed kaidan in the first game so never got to know him. but i never like him much, seemed like a serial whinger. im playing the original trilogy again as a female shep this time and was going to pick him in stead of ashley, but i may change my mind.
    the other one for me was Zaeed. i just never liked him and didnt bother using him in my squad.

    side note, i never got Kasumi, was she any good?

      Decent enough, but nothing special. Basically a cloak/backstab sort of character, I recall.

      her quests were fun, and she was somewhat interesting. but she wasn't a very useful character.

      her quests were fun, and she was somewhat interesting. but she wasn't a very useful character.

      From what i remember she was interesting in the DLC but doesn't do or say much once she's in your crew.

    Kaidan
    Jacob
    Ashley
    Cora

    Ya know... the humans. So dull. Never romance them. Never take them on missions unless I have no other choice.

    Tali

    And now we wait.

      can you justify that or are you just trolling?

        Nah she's not the worst that is reserved for Ashley. For ones that make it through the entire game I didn't find her as interesting as everyone else seemed to. She bored me and I think part of her appeal was that people thought she was exotic and much deeper than she actually was.

        My typical crew was any of across the three games
        Garrus (favourite)
        Wrex
        Liara (2nd favourite)
        Thane
        Grunt
        Mordin and
        Legion

        Last edited 30/03/17 6:26 pm

          Tali was a goddamn whinger; I got over her "if my suit rips I risk infection or death" line after I heard it for the millionth time. Also the fact that she sounded like The Nanny.

      I'm actually with you, I didn't like her much through 2 and sided with Legion completely in 3. Mind you I didn't play 1 (I know, I know, I done screwed up. I also didn't carry my save from 2 to 3 if that makes you feel better) so might feel different if I did.

        Fun fact: there was a third option in ME3 that saved both the Quarians and the Geth. It was difficult to get but it was possible.

        I forgive you I played 2 then 1 then 2 again and then 3. But going from 2 to 1 gameplay wise was very difficult. The worst thing with the game for 2 is that they killed off Wrex and Ashley is the Virmire survivor.

    I wish there was the option to sacrifice both Kaidan AND Ashley in ME1.

      But then who would irrationally judge you for no good reason halfway through the second game?

    Also, what's this "Garrrus is the best character" nonsense? If I could have made Mass Effect 1 "Shep and Wrex Hit the Road", I would have.

      Can you please do that, but in the style of "Russel Coights: All Aussie Adventures"

    Kaidan and Ashley

    granted Ashley was a racist so at least she had that going for her

      wasnt she part black also?

        not that i'm aware of.

        tbh they both have deep history... a lot fleshed out in comics heh

    Humans, humans are the worst.

    Pretty much all of the interesting characters are alien, then the wifies are either Kelly or Miranda.

    So yeah, humans are the worst... cept Shep (male or female), Shep is bae.

      I agree but only the 'good' or 'military' humans.
      Jack, Zaeed and Kasumi (for as little as she's really there) were cool and had some great moments, but that's because unlike the other humans they were outlaws/criminals and did not give a fuck. All the other humans are bland by-the-book types to the extent that I was genuinely surprised when they added another one in 3 and I actually ended up liking Vega more than pretty much any of the others barring Jack. Never added him to the team but he was at least good for a chat.

      Last edited 30/03/17 4:15 pm

    I killed Ashley in the first game mostly because she forced me to reload a save to stop her from killing one of my better squadmates, regretted it, should of used it to take out Kaidan.

    Kaiden (who was actually Carth Onasi sneaking over from KOTOR). To make the same boring, whiny character in two games and even have the gall to have the same voice actor, is sin in both writing and laziness. Every play through of ME1, I made sure he died, despite Ashley being painful (she improved in ME3).

      holy shit you just blew my mind!
      yes, i see it now. fuck. im sticking with Ash on my current play through, its official.

    Nope, got it in the title image. Jacob 100%.

    "ugh jacob is talking" is still me and a mate's phrase for a dull cutscene.

      I think Jacob was intended to be a human Garrus, but they just never got the chemistry going with him as they did with Garrus. I think that's part of why they dropped him in ME3

    Kelly Chambers hands down. every time I walk past the starmap "commander you have a new message" or "commander no new messages"
    I get it kelly! i have email! just shutup!

      What about Jessica Chobot, who couldn't inject emotion into her voice to save her life.

        Oh, Allers the reporter.
        Forgot about her! IIRC i knocked her out so she didnt join my crew so I never ended up having to deal with her lol

        The new Mass Effect characters can't inject emotions into their face to save their life.

          That's Frostbite at work more than the characters. The engine was never intended to spend a lot of time focusing on faces.

      Oh man I totally forgot about her and you're totally right.
      also SHE STOLE YOUR FISH DAMMIT!

    While Jacob was the biggest 'non event' (I kept waiting for him to die off in the first scene and then was a little bit affronted when he appeared on my ship) I feel like Liara was the one I most actively hated. Sorry, Liara-mancers.

    Kaidan, on the other hand, was a lot of fun to laugh at so I kept him around.

      Honestly, I think adding Liara to this franchise was the biggest mistake Bioware made.

    I like it how you chose Jacob as the photo for this article ;)

    My worst:

    Jacob - because he was just so darn boring.
    Kaidan - also boring.
    Tali - annoyed the hell out of me, gave up her race in favour of Legion, he was the best.
    James - can't even think up a good way to describe him, he's just so plain.
    Thane - he's 50/50 for me, didn't like his story much, but he was good to have in combat.
    Liara - she was alright in #1, but dead to me afterwards.

    Because, why not. My faves:

    Garrus - all-round compliment to the party. I liked going Engi, so he was my soldier. Funny guy too. Did not bone.
    Grunt/Wrex - another good compliment, great tank. Would have totally been a Jill Sandwich with these two.
    Jack - my fave biotic, so hot. Wanted to make everything better for her, without pants on.
    Miranda - decent enough in combat, otherwise all focus was on the chest area. Jack had more than enough personality to overlook this space.
    Legion - because Tali is a monster.

      i was so surprised with Legion, he was fucking awesome. alos really liked what they did with Edi too. and what did you think about Javik?

        I dunno about Edi, I liked her in 2, but then she turned into a sexdoll for Joker and was all awkward, I mean sure, he's definitely the kinda guy that would fall in love with an inanimate object that isn't so inanimate...................

        Javik was a real interesting ark...

    Miranda. I personally hated her, I always went out of the way to be mean to her - there was just something about her I couldn't stand. I didn't mind Kaiden and Ashley, they grew on you. I disliked Jacob after ME3 - how dare he leave FemShep for his family. But my party always consisted of Garrus and Tali in ME1&3, and was mixed in ME2 with Garrus, Tali, Thane, Grunt and Samara.

    ^ I get too involved and emotionally invested in games...

    I pick Suvi

    "massive mineral deposit detected"

    Mineral deposit visible from space.

    +60 Aluminium.

      reminds me of when I hit a rich node on Eos and I got 7 silicon out of it or something

      ha "rich"

    Tough call between Kaidan and Ashley. On one hand, Kaidan is just boring and complains a lot. On the other hand, Ashley is also boring and a huge racist. I'm sure she develops over time, but I didn't get a chance to know her because of her fate in the first Mass Effect game, when you essentially have to choose Kaidan or Ashley. For me, Ashley is the least likeable character.

    really never got the love for Garrus, was too cookie cutter for me, he's ok but not very good lol

    James from ME3
    He was a complete non-entity. Generic backstory ("Oh noes my squad got killed, wasn't my fault, got praise from command, but I blame myself for it"), no personality beyond muscle-bound marine, and got shoved in our faces at the start of ME3 and we're expected to know who he is (because Shepard did apparently).
    Runner up is Ashley. She did a whole 'tolerance life lesson' thing in ME1, then treated you like a criminal after you save her life in ME2, and keeps distrusting you for no reason in ME3.

    I let Ashley die in ME1 so I didn't really get to know her character. But I really didn't like how xenophobic she was.

    I liked taking Miranda on missions with me because she would kill a bad guy and then yell "NOICE" and it was the Aussiest thing ever.

    In Andromeda, I'm finding Addison to be a very annoying character. All she does is bitch, bitch, bitch.

    Fenris.

    I realize he's a Dragon Age 2 companion but he's just so fucking terrible that I can't think on anyone in Mass Effect that annoys me as much. Seriously. Fuck that mopey, mage-hating little bitch.

      Fenris: I'm going to act like a belligerent ass and upset both of your party NPCs. Let me join crew.
      Hawke: Bye.

      Him. I killed the shit out of him. Hated him more than any of the most loathsome Mass Effect characters.

    Let me preface this by saying I have not played enough of ME1 to have an opinion on those characters specific to that game. This was because I started the series at ME2 and ME1's controls on PC made me want to uninstall on their own. I have been thinking about revisiting though since it's been enough time.

    Top 5:
    Tali - Super mysterious, cool design, fit well into my squad, story was really good, and she was just downright nice.
    Garrus - Endless calibrations. Also his recruitment mission in ME2 was awesome
    Mordin - One of the more unique characters in the game. One of the hardest choices to make in ME3. In reality he would be super annoying to be around, but he's so damn loveable at the same time.
    Legion - It was such a shame you got him so late in the game in ME2. He was pretty useful and an interesting character to boot.
    Thane - Character design was awesome. Also, generally cool character.

    Honorable Mentions: Joker and Illusive Man because I really like Seth Green and Martin Sheen.

    Bottom 5:
    Jack - Absolutely cannot stand Jack. Her design is just ugly, and her backstory was boring/frustrating. If I could eject anyone out of the airlock, it would be Jack.
    Jacob - Cookie cutter black dude who is super boring and not very useful. Its a shame they placed him in the armoury on the Normandy because I like looking at guns but dont really want to interact with Jacob.
    James Vega - See Jacob except less black. I think I talked to him once in the entirety of my ME3 playthrough.
    Zaeed - Super standard hard-bit mercenary type. I dont even recall his voice now that I think about it.
    Liam - He's about as uninteresting as characters in MEA get so far. Probably not as bad as Jacob but still pretty bland. He even admits during the game his backstory is boring! Also his accent is super jarring for some reason. Every time he talks I just sit there thinking "stop it Liam, I'm sure you have something important to say, but if you dont learn sign language and start using it in the next 5 seconds I'm cutting you off."

    Dishonorable Mentions: Miranda (she's hot enough to be out of the bottom 5) and Vectra Nyx for being the replacement Garrus and not being anywhere near as cool.

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