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Show Us Your Ugliest Video Game Outfits

Nathan Grayson Avatar
Nathan Grayson
Show Us Your Ugliest Video Game Outfits

You did it. You finally got that sweet armour set you’ve been assembling for days. You look like a million bucks. Time to parade around town being shiny AF and… oh no. You found a new chest plate with slightly better stats. Have fun being a damn circus clown for the next 20 hours.

I’ve been playing a lot of Zelda: Breath of the Wild lately, and I have to admit: my Link has been the victim of more than a few fashion crimes.

This outfit almost works, until you realise that the Blood Mohawk Helm Of Genghis Khan looks goofy as heck on beautiful boy-man Link Zeldanson, the tunic is a patchwork quilt torn from the loving hands of somebody’s grandmother, and the greaves belong in a different fantasy universe altogether. But the helm grants me an attack bonus! And I’ve got a fairy power-up on my tunic! It’s like my grandmother always used to say: “Form comes second to function when giants won’t stop stomping on you.”

This is hardly the only ugly outfit my Link has spent hours running around in. Here are others:

Show Us Your Ugliest Video Game Outfits
Show Us Your Ugliest Video Game Outfits
Show Us Your Ugliest Video Game Outfits

Also, special props to my friend Andrew Goldfarb, who has resolutely dedicated himself to playing through all of Breath of the Wild with Link in a Nintendo Switch shirt:

Other examples: I was guilty of making Geralt look like he got fashion advice from a rock troll in The Witcher 3, and I’ll never forget my Tauren shaman in World of Warcraft, who spent most of his hardcore raiding glory days looking like a mix between a Christmas tree and a grade school paper mache volcano experiment.

Basically, this video from ProZD sums it up:

What are the worst fashion crimes you’ve committed in the name of stats (or because, god forbid, you enjoy being the outfit equivalent of any dance club mash-up involving “Last Resort” by Papa Roach)?

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