Nintendo’s E3 Presentation: The Liveblog

Hello friends. Feel like staying up until 2am and watching Nintendo STUFF?

Have I got the post for you.

It’s my awesome E3 Nintendo liveblog. We’re gonna talk about Mario and drink green tea and it’s gonna be a great time. Please join me. I promise I’ll wake up.


15.58
Come on! It’s gonna be fun. Apparently it’s not just Mario. It’s other stuff too. Although, if the Mario presentation is as good as the Zelda presentation was last year I’ll be good with that.

Zelda man, that game.

Anyway, the hope eternal is a Metroid surprise. But yeah, that’s not gonna happen.

OR IS IT?


1.07
Oh man, I’m awake. I thought I was out but they keep pulling me back in. Are we excited about being awake at at 1am again because of VIDEO GAMES?

I just drank a tall glass of milk. I’m gonna need to get me more than that to get through this. Bring on the caffeine!


1.26 OK, I’m settled it. The kettle is boiled. Nintendo people are subtly telling us to check our expectations for this event, which means time TO GET UNREASONABLY HYPED.

— Where is my Metroid? Where is it. I’m gonna flip tables and do unnecessary damage to my house if it doesn’t appear.

— Actually that’s all I want. Just give it to me please.


1.47


1.51
Okay I want this to happen now.

1.59
Alright come on let’s get this thing kicking already. I can only eat so much beef jerky.

2.05
Holy shit this NORTHERN ENGLISH ACCENT is amazing. I can’t believe I’m hearing this accent in a JRPG video game in 2017. This is world class.

Well that was Xenoblade Chronicles 2.


2.08
Well that Kirby game was very punchy. Simple logo KIRBY MOTHAFUCKAS.

I’m not sure I’ll be too keen on that game. But whatevs.


2.10
Well shit, Pokemon RPG game for Switch. That’s a no brainer. Glad it’s in development even though we literally didn’t get to see a goddamn thing.


2.11
AH SHIT GET FUCKED NINTENDO WON E3 WITH A FUCKING LOGO


2.14
Okay sure, I will play co-op Yoshi game with my son. That’s okay.

Sorry still reeling from Metroid Prime announcement.


2.17
Okay this Zelda DLC seems a lot better than I first thought. That battle mode level escalation thing seems super cool. I will play that a lot.


2.20
Still thinking about that logo.

What does it all mean?


2.22
Ah holy shit this is a great idea. Rocket League on Switch with crossplay. Yes, get in. I love that OG Rocket League song.


2.25
Okay what the hell did I just watch. That Mario trailer was really something else. There’s a hat, that sort of fucking possesses people. This is some Twin Peaks shit.

Mario straight up fucking possesses people.

Okay, I’m out. Thanks for tuning in!


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