Shark Dating Simulator Is Crude But Funny

Have you ever watched Jaws, saw the shark, and thought it was kinda hot? Well you're in luck, because now you can live out your aquatic apex predator lovin' dreams in Shark Dating Simulator XL. Be warned — it is definitely NSFW.

Screenshot of Shark Chan in her partial human form, taken from the Steam webpage.

In this comedic visual novel, you play as a scuba school graduate who has to explore the wreckage of the boat The Golden Fin for your boss, Marina, who is a "fish scientist". You are supposed to find talking fish, but when you dive down to the wreckage, you end up meeting a talking great white shark named Shark Chan! Your ultimate goal in this game is to win the heart of this shark-woman.

A screenshot from my playthrough of Shark Dating Simulator XL. Shark Chan expresses that she really wants to get laid.

As with many visual novels, your dialogue choices impact how well you do in the game. If you treat Shark Chan nicely, you acquire "balls" which you can use in a mini game at the end. In order to sleep with Shark Chan at the end of the game, you need to score 180 points in a ping-pong-esque mini game. You drop the balls in order to break up all the little heart bubbles. Depending on how you have treated her, Shark Chan may give you more balls for being sweet, or take away some of your balls if you've been a jerk to her.

I played through the game about four different times to try to trigger different endings and results. Each of my playthroughs were relatively short, with my first being 10-15 minutes and then my subsequent tries being around 8-10.

The game's humour pokes fun at Marina, the protagonist's boss, and her large breasts. Within minutes of starting the game, you have the option to ask Marina if her breasts are real. Thankfully the game doesn't solely rely on sexist humour, but it it does remain grotesque and somewhat clumsy. You encounter a sea slug who screams, "SUCK MAH BALLS!" The main character is a bit of a bumbling doofus. At one point, Shark Chan tells him that a restaurant they're meeting at for a date is "half a nautical mile" from her home. "If only I knew what the fuck a nautical mile was," he comments. When Shark Chan says, "OK Senpai, let's get down to business," he responds with, "To defeat the Huns?" It's a bit over-the-top, but, apart from the stereotypical portrayal and treatment of women in this game, some of it made me laugh.

The mini game, where you get your chance to win Shark Chan's heart. The ball count is in the upper right hand corner. I have a high ball count because I am a GENTLEMAN.

The game is still in early access, and there is currently only one playable route, but the developer, Conan McPhee, plans to add more datable sharks in the future. He also mentions that he will likely update the graphics and improve some of the content based on players' feedback. For now, you can grab it on Steam for $US0.99 ($1.25).


    Yeesh, that art is... not great. Sounds like the writing needs work too. When has anyone said "suck mah balls" in the last 10 years either.

    I'm a fan of the novelty dating VN genre but this one sure seems to need improvement.

      With the popularity shark women have had these days I'm really surprised this is the best they could do.

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