Part of life for the video games industry is dealing with ratings agencies and government departments charged with overseeing standards of decency. Sometimes, just sometimes, that process produces some gems.
I noticed one such gem by chance earlier today, when I was grabbing a screenshot from the Steam page for Assassin's Creed: Odyssey. In Australia, Odyssey is rated MA15+ with additional warnings of online interactivity and strong violence.
As part of the classification process, publishers have to fill out a 13 page form. If the game has content that's likely to be classified as M or above, the application "must be accompanied by particulars of that material" with supplementary attachments.
Publishers and developers then have to fill out boxes describing "the most impactful" classifiable elements. How much sex is in the game? Does Garrus fuck? Or does the scene fade to black? What specific moment in a cutscene does a character get their head blown off?
Obviously, these forms product a style of discourse that is worlds apart from any normal discussion of a video game. It's the kind of clinical jargon you'd expect if someone was trying to seriously write an "objective" review. It's a video game broken up into its raw parts, removed of all emotion and expression.
So what happens when you have to describe a game that deals with assassinations on one side and suggestive banging on the other? You can see what that looks like in the "Mature Content Description" on the Steam page.
Alternatively, here's a handy pictorial guide.
Being on the Classification Board must be a fun job sometimes. Speaking of the Board: if you'd like to use the above format for future applications, go right ahead.