The Internet Reacts To Hanzo’s Abtacular Summer Skin

The Internet Reacts To Hanzo’s Abtacular Summer Skin
Image: Blizzard

The U.S. is currently enjoying a barmy summer and you know what that means: Blizzard has made yet another Overwatch character hot. Also, Lucioball is back for the fourth year in a row. Between those two things, it’s unsurprising that it’s Hanzo “Hotzo” Shimada who’s the talk of the balmy beach town right now.

Today, Blizzard surprise- (well, sorta-surprise-) launched Overwatch’s annual Summer Games event a little bit earlier than usual. Despite innumerable clamors for a shake-up, it’s still pretty much the same it’s been since 2015, with the soccer-like Lucioball mode taking center stage.

But there are also new skins, and Hanzo’s puts a new spin on a familiar dynamic, which I’ve eloquently titled “doofy dad man hot now???” Typically clad in poofy pajamas with a spacious nipple window, Hanzo has now donned slick swimwear inspired by a classic Japanese print and a vest that frees his abs from their wrinkly fabric prison.

Samurai dad is once again samurai daddy, and all is right with the world. Fans are celebrating in the traditional way: by being extremely thirsty on main.

But Hanzo’s not the only one who’s ready to both hit the beach and ruthlessly strike down all who dare oppose him this year. Torbjorn’s poolside duds are much more whimsical and, I would argue, better for it. He’s got a sandcastle backpack, an inflatable pool toy mallet, and a seashell-speckled beard. This, too, has inspired a whole host of fan reactions:

Can’t wait until next year, when Blizzard will probably celebrate Lucioball’s five-year anniversary by putting the ball in a swimsuit and giving it abs.


  • i have a suspicion had this been 2 female characters with new bikini skins or other revealing beach wear triggering the same kind of thirsty response we would be reading a very different article.

    • Nah, those double standards don’t exist anymore… I mean it’s !

      One might say they’re about as fictional as the air you breath.

    • I’m guessing you missed the thirst for dummy thicc Mei from a few months ago 🙂

      Also, Bikini Widowmaker has been in the game for like two years and nobody is batting an eyelid.

      • you are correct i did miss the thirst and i know nothing about the other skins because i don’t play overwatch, i certainly meant to frame my comment as a critique of what this particular author would likely do but it looks like i forgot that part.

    • Depends who the author is and what they are feeling on the day. With Nathan, yeah, you’d be dead right. With Gita, frankly, she can be thirsty for the ladies but you just never know if her thirst or her SJW will win on the day.

Show more comments

Log in to comment on this story!