KFC's Giving Colonel Sanders His Own Dating Simulator

kentucky fried my chicken all right

Remember Dream Daddy? Now imagine that, but the only daddy that matters has a big white beard and he is super keen to show you his fried chicken.

Update: This story has been retimed to coincide with the game's release on Steam tonight. More details here.

Due out tonight and developed by Psyop (makers of the interactive fiction Camp W) the game's called I Love You, Colonel Sanders! A Finger Lickin’ Good Dating Simulator. And in case you're in any doubt as to what kind of direction KFC is going with this, allow me to demonstrate:

Good lord.

The official description — apart from doubling down on the fact that, yes, this is officially backed by KFC — notes that the game has secret recipes, a secret ending, cooking battles, battle battles (?), and, yes, the only thing anyone cares about: you can date Colonel Sanders. Doesn't mention whether you can fuck Colonel Sanders, but I'm sure modders will rectify that oversight if KFC doesn't allow it. Surely they know it's coming.

Ship away, people. Who's shipping the beard? And how long before this gets rule 34'd?


Comments

    Unlike Dream Daddy, this has some sort of perverse magnetism that intrigues me. Quite possibly because it’s official.

    I think Fork Parker has the best comment to make on this game:
    https://twitter.com/ForkParker/status/1171408923758354436
    "My prediction is the KFC dating sim on Steam will be a huge hit and cause a significant number of developers to reasses their career choice and ultimately leave video games altogether."

    If ever you thought life was getting to predictable, this. Nobody saw this coming. Nobody.

    I wonder what'll be in the R18 patch.

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