If you forgot to put in for leave ahead of Baldur’s Gate 3, you might be thinking about getting a sick note for tomorrow. Not to fret, the very wise lawyers (marketing team, definitely not lawyers) at Larian Studios have a solution — give your boss a very convincing Cleric’s Note.
Obviously, this is not a real doctor’s note and is in no way legally binding (though it might actually work in Victoria. I’d expect Queensland to send it to the scrutineers and tell you to get back to work, however). The creation of a pretend doctor’s note is a time-honoured video game marketing strategy right out of the 90’s playbook where the Baldur’s Gate series began.
What I think is wild about this Baldur’s Gate 3 sick note is that it’s literally asking for leave to celebrate the game’s release. You’re never going to get away with that. You could have gone all in here, Larian. “There’s fucking Illithid on the loose, and my motley crew of extremely kissable friends are the only ones who can stop them. See you guys on Monday.” The Forgotten Realms are in existential peril. Let’s maybe ask for forgiveness rather than permission.
And you’ll probably need the time off. If Larian’s other games, like Divinity: Original Sin 2, are any indication, the total play time for Baldur’s Gate 3 is going to be somewhere between “500 hours” and “No one can be sure that it actually ends”. That’s to say nothing of the game’s six-year development time and the 23-year gap between Baldur’s Gate 2 and the newest instalment.
Anyway, a very happy Baldur’s Gate 3 release week to those who celebrate. We’ve waited a bloody long time for this. Any boss that makes you work this week is a bum.
Baldur’s Gate 3 launches on August 2 for Windows PC, Mac, and PlayStation 5.
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