Kirlia Can Rip Holes In Spacetime And Also Loves To Dance

Kirlia Can Rip Holes In Spacetime And Also Loves To Dance
Image: The Pokemon Company / Kotaku

Every Pokemon is interesting and worth talking about. I don’t play a ton of Pokemon, but I do enjoy the universe and I love learning more about the creatures in it. So, Here’s Another Pokemon! It’s Kirlia!

Kirlia Details

Type: Psychic/Fairy

Average Height: 2′ 07″

Average Weight: 20 kg

First Added In Generation III

Sometimes the cutest and most unassuming things are really the most dangerous and potentially powerful. For example, Kirlia is a lovely-looking Pokemon who loves to dance on sunny mornings and grows prettier when it meets someone kind and good-hearted. Kirlia can also rip holes in spacetime, see the future, and create mirages with its psychokinetic powers. And 10-year-old kids catch and train these things because nobody cares about anything in the Pokemon universe.

I really enjoy the way some Pokedex entries listed on Bulbapedia just state these two facts, it can rip through dimensions and it enjoys dancing, back to back with no attempt to even connect them or anything.

Screenshot: The Pokemon Company Screenshot: The Pokemon Company

For example, check out this entry found in Emerald. “A Kirlia has the psychic power to create a rip in the dimensions and see into the future. It is said to dance with pleasure on sunny mornings.”

I can’t get over how much mental whiplash this entry gives me. Also, how many Pokemon can see into the future? This is not the first time I’ve covered a creature in this universe that can see the future. At least it’s dancing, so hopefully, the future is good. Or maybe it’s super fucked up and Kirlia is just an arsehole who enjoys suffering, like Stunfisk.

Favourite Fan Art

I picked this piece of art because it’s cute and also isn’t just porn. I have no problems with sexy drawings, enjoy what you enjoy. But my bosses and editors aren’t as cool about Pokemon porn. But it’s very easy to find. I might say too easy.

Random Facts

  • According to some Pokedex entries, Kirlia actually gets stronger when it is near cheerful people. So this thing is screwed right now in 2020.
  • The horns on its head actually help it focus its psychokinetic powers, allowing it to create non-solid images in thin air.
  • If Kirlia can see into the future, can it warn us of future tragedies? Someone go ask it abo- Oh nevermind, it’s fucking dancing again.

Best Comment From Last Week

“It has a good reason to be upset: you evolve into this ‘Mon by trading with a specific other one, Karrablast, so the little blue dude swipes his helmet mid trade. In a new land with a new owner, Accelgor knows he’ll never find that helmet ever again. It’s a hard life for our movie quality bug ninja.”

-Nad

In our world, creatures evolve over time based on their surroundings and biological needs. In the Pokemon world, stuff evolves because kids get bored and decide to trade shit.

Darwin would be very confused.

Previously On Here’s Another Pokemon…

Accelgor Is The Tom Cruise Of The Pokemon World

Every Pokemon is interesting and worth talking about. I don’t play a ton of Pokemon, but I do enjoy the universe and I love learning more about the creatures in it. So, Here’s Another Pokemon! It’s Accelgor!

Read more

Here’s Another Pokemon is a weekly look into one Pokemon and how weird, disturbing, silly, or cool it is and why.

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