Horoscopes, like video games, are a fun, completely made up hobby that’s totally normal in moderation. I’m looking to the stars for what’s in store for all the gamers out there for the week.
If you were born today, you share a birthday with Silent Hill, SimCity 3000, and Super Smash Bros. Brawl (in Japan, anyway). Aquarians like yourself are free thinkers that strive to be independent, but you tend to fuss too much over details that can hold back your growth. This year your birthday occurs shortly after the New Moon, giving you a chance to revitalise and turn over a new leaf.
Like Max Caulfield, this can be a chance to discover new parts of yourself and right old wrongs, or like Proteus, this can be a stranger, more metaphorical journey. But don’t keep tearing yourself down and rebuilding yourself ad nauseum, or you’ll end up like the Duke Nukem franchise — fifteen years too late.
Aries (March 21st – April 19th)
Venus will slip into your sign on Friday, and will remain there until April — this planet rules over beauty and love, unsurprisingly. You’ll exude wit and charm for four weeks, you lucky dog. You might have better chemistry with your teammates in competitive games. Or maybe you should just scope out which characters from Mass Effect: Andromeda you’ll wanna kiss.
Taurus (April 20th – May 20th)
This is a time for giving. For a stubborn sign that’s usually rooted in the material world, this might be a challenge. Play a support character — your friends will thank you.
Gemini (May 21st – June 20th)
Get out there and be as open to new friendships as you can! Try a game night at your board game shop, catch up with your friends in Overwatch or head to a local fighting game night. Now’s the time to make sure you stick to your plans, as the friendships you make this week will bring joy to your life.
Cancer (June 21st – July 22nd)
The usually touchy Cancers of the world have a four week shot to make good impressions, as friendships and your love life will be easier with Venus at the top of your chart. If there’s anyone in the wider sphere of video game fandom that you’ve wanted to reach out to — developers, YouTubers, journalists or professional gamers — this might be your chance.
Leo (July 23rd – August 22)
Venus occupies the part of your chart that concerns travel, as well as publishing and the media (yes, really!). Ever wanted to write about games? Now’s the time to send that pitch! Wanna go to a convention? Book those tickets! Leos are natural go-getters, so use your determination to get what you want.
Virgo (August 23rd – September 22nd)
Venus in Aries means it’s time for focus on that bread — you’ll have more luck in the financial department starting Friday. Just remember that these new gains are temporary, and you should try to get one game you know you’ll love rather than a bunch of games you might not touch.
Libra (September 23rd – October 22nd)
For Libras, life is about balance, and while they will benefit from the same Venus in Aries boost that the rest of the signs will, maybe take that out of your hobby if you have been really indulging lately. If you’re made a cool online friend, make a plan to watch a movie over Skype. If there are IRL friends you haven’t seen in a while, meet up for coffee.
Scorpio (October 23rd – November 21st)
You’ll be in great health and have lots of luck at your job for the next two months, giving you more time for your hobby, if you want. While you could finally finish your backlog, you could also try something physical, like Zombies Run!. Maybe you can even try Resident Evil 7 in VR. It might give me a heart attack, but it definitely won’t give you one.
Sagittarius (November 22nd – December 21st)
Vacations will be boosted by Venus in Aries, so if you’ve wanted an excuse to take a personal day to finally finish that one game, I’m not telling anyone. Your idealism will serve you well, as combined with where Venus is in your chart, you’ll be absolutely magnetic. Anyone who plays with you will be happy to have you in their party.
Capricorn (December 22nd – January 19th)
Your home life will be prosperous this week. Try a new tabletop game with your significant other, or finally finish building that PC. Now’s also the time to entertain at home, so couch co-op might bring all your friends closer.
Aquarius (January 20th – February 18th)
With a boost to your relationships, it might be time for the imaginative Aquarius to start a new tabletop RPG campaign. Regardless of whether or not you DM, you and your party will see a greater sense of accomplishment and togetherness for now, and for the next four weeks.
Pisces (February 18th – March 20th)
You will experience an economic windfall with Venus in Aries, and as much as you want to spend it on yourself, the giving Pisces will see the value in spreading the wealth around. But don’t just give your friends games or make sure they stay healed up — donating money to charity in tumultuous times will help everyone.
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