Here is a mod by Minecraft forum user Flammarilva which allows you to talk to Minecraft creepers/mobs...because the mod turns them into anime girls much like the ones you'd find in a Japanese visual novel. You can defeat (or befriend!) the mobs by speaking to them. There are multiple dialogue options and everything. Watch above.
Yes, this mod is from June 2012. I came across it only yesterday via Twitter, where people were absolutely baffled that something like this even exists.
It would be easy to make fun of the mod, much like I made fun of the idea of perpetually sweating in yesterday's post about Skyrim's sexy sweat mod. I mean, sure, it's kind of hilarious and ridiculous in a 'oh, the things people think of' kind of way, but I think there is a fascinating subtext here. Let's dig in.
How do we look at the women we talk to on visual novels? We know, walking in, that they are likely conquests we can 'have' once we put enough kindness coins into them, at which point sex/affection falls out. Realistically we know this about most love interests in games regardless of whether or not it's a visual novel, it just so happens that many visual novels are strictly about the relationships you foster with love interests.
We know this to be the case even if along the way, we genuinely grow to have fondness for the character. We know this to be the case even if we appreciate the characterization/writing of the character and consider them a good approximation of an actual person.
For all that love interests resemble actual people though, we still know that they are programmed in such a way where if you meet certain criteria, you can totally nail that character. The only people who see real life in such a way — where you can game another person's love — tend to be folks who believe in stuff like ladder theory or are PUAs. Which is to say, they tend to be kind of gross, because they stop considering people as people who have complex desires and cannot be won over by fulfilling a checklist.
If a woman is an obstacle, then there is not much difference between a goomba (or a creeper/mob) and a love interest in a game. Both are 'problems' that you 'solve,' though not in the same ways. The skins that these obstacles wear don't really matter, they are exchangable. The only difference is how we choose to deal with these obstacles. This mod acknowledges that, though not explicitly.
Anyway, I'm curious as to why the first creepers talk about some cat and I think it's neat ('neat') that the mobs can translate to visual novel girl cliches. Some are tsundere, for instance. And I genuinely think having the ability to talk your way out of issues in Minecraft is interesting even if it's wrapped around something weird like this (and even if it doesn't quiiite make sense.) Diplomacy is just as valid a power fantasy as any other.
If you are interested in the mod, you can download it here.There are instructions and a changelog for you to read too. Have fun?