There are few games as brutally demanding as From Software’s Demon’s Souls, the PlayStation 3 exclusive RPG out this week. Which is why you’ll really earn it if you manage to win a copy.
UPDATE: This draw is now closed. A new draw opens Thursday 11am.
Thanks to Namco Bandai, we have FIVE copies of Demon’s Souls on PS3 to give away this week. All five are Black Phantom Editions, too, containing the game, the CD soundtrack, a hardcover artbook and a strategy guide. We’re giving away one each day this week.
So how do you win?
Demon’s Souls takes an unusual approach to online play. You can use stones to jump into the games of other players to both help them and harass them. Players can also leave messages – advice, warnings, poetry and gibberish – etched into the game world for others to read.
We want you to write a message for your fellow competition entrants to read. Leave your message in the comments below by midnight tonight to be in the running to win. The wittiest and most creative messages will win.
As usual, no multiple entries please. But if you don’t win today, you can always enter tomorrow’s draw with a brand new message.
And Tuesday’s winner is… Ryan Stalgis, who riddled us thus:
My first is in batter but not in create My second’s the sound that all good pirates make My third is a pronoun with one letter only My fourth is the same as the first (it got lonely) My fifth can be cubed for a popular expo My sixth is a blank, so we’ll move on now, let’s go My seventh begins the first name of the judge My eighth is in ravage one more time than once My ninth can be found trailing right behind you My tenth can behold things (most people have two) My eleventh’s the same as the seventh again My twelfth is another blank one – onward then! My thirteenth’s a drink but can also mean dinner My fourteenth’s the shape of the mouth of the winner My fifteenth’s a blank, and the last one I swear Quickly, come on now, keep up – almost there! My sixteenth is double the one ninth’s trailing after My seventeeth’s second in singe and disaster My eighteenth is found in the name of the prize And the country it first was released (good luck guys!)
Of course, it’s not true!
Shouts out to Bukake Kane, Leon Zhang, Terry, Anti-Stone, Dean, Nworb, David Ferris, Topher and asimovy. Another good day of entries. Keep them coming!
By reading this message you signify your agreement in cancelling your entry into this competition.
¡ǝʌoqɐ ɯoɹɟ ɹǝbuɐp ¡ǝɹɐʍǝq
Your souls will be safe with me – for three easy payments of – this game is too hard – this game is unfair – #%@!% – plus freight
Beware the Trolls!
Use the BanHammer!
iseedeadpeople typing to win demon’s souls
Hard to remove bloodstains? Try Demon Soul-vent.
Note to passers by
This sign has already been seen
Signed
Ace Of Base
If there’s grass on the field, play ball
Full of wisdom, as always… 😀
Bob Lives Here
You enter competitions like a dairy farmer.
“I’m sorry but your princess is in another castle”
Beware, this message has absolutely no value.
if you read this message then it signifies ou have wated your time.
*you
I got paid $5 to distract you with this sign while someone sneaks up behind you.
Darth Vader is Lukes father.
STOP!
….hammertime
Hope you brought your wallet, because the rent in Boletaria gets paid in advance!
Give up now.
There is always someone wittier than you.
1f u c4n r34d th15 u r3411y n33d 70 g37 141d
Has anyone seen my iPhone?
Phantom Black edition, even more satisfying than your momma
No, the source of his power does not come from his moobs.
Welcome to Bolteria. Your imminent death makes the game harder. Have a pleasant stay.
There is a reason to throw your controller in frustration ahead.
Beware, overuse of memes ahead.
(Written at very start of game)
ORLY?
It’s more afraid of you than you are of it.
Wait, the other way around.
Have fun.
erif erif ikan erif erif erif dimaggio
“The hideous creature of the underdark ahead just wants a hug, put away your weapons and walk right in, you’ll be fine….”
So I followed this little white rabbit down a hole, and now I find myself here… what gives??
Could’ve at least left a girl something to eat or drink. Somebody please tell my sister I’ll be late for tea.
Alice
just remember no matter how good yours is, a ten year old in his room is writing a better one
Phantom Edition
Thou art a bitch to obtain
Time to give up now
ALL YOUR SOUL BELONG TO US!
“You’re already dead” (has this been done?)
Those who read this message with their right hand resting on their mouse have no sex life.
Big black blob+giant metal knight+ Evil Assasin+Usurper King+crazy screaming lady+evil maneating gargoyles+some weird hat man+Majin Buu with a cleaver+some fire demon+a giant manta+a man made of leeches+some sort of ogre+a mentalist lady+a giant piece of crap in a tree= Demon Souls, the hardest game last year.
Wanted: two assistants to travel to a land clouded with fog and populated with undead and demons. This is not a joke!
The successful applicants will be: well armed, familiar with magicks, blue, able to work well in a team environment, deceased, supply their own green herbs and run slower from demons than myself.
You have a better chance of touching an asymptote than beating this game. Or this competition.
Listless, waiting, here I stand
Eternal darkness reaches out it’s hand
To me, it calls, it beckons near
Malevolence and hate and fear
Enemies are all around me
Watching as the fiends surround me
I scrawl here as is takes my mind
Now the message is yours to find
PLEASE
I wrote this message 7 months ago thinking an Australian may read it
This message only viewable to PSN+ users
You have just unlocked easy mode!
Hi There, you look weary my friend,
Take a seat and I’ll pep you up, are you settled? Okay; I want you to think of a happy place, it can have penguins – I won’t judge. Good, close your eyes and picture that happy place. Let it sooth over your being, excellent you’re doing great!
Now picture a clock in your cave … err I mean place, digital will work best but you can go old school if you like. Right we are in a happy place and we have a nice shinny clock on the wall. I want you to look at the time on that clock and change it to the current time. Use your mind, its your happy place. Try not to get ahead of yourself with the power of the happy place, just adjust the clock. We don’t need naked ladies or ice cream. Just a nice big clock.
Ok now imagine that clock is ticking and your eyes are getting even more wary, they are heavy but its Okay because they’re already closed. We are in our happy place with our clock,Tic Toc Tic Toc goes your clock. It is soothing and you can lose yourself in its methodical chime.
Now I want your to set the alarm on your clock, you know that little bell symbol, I bet you wished you went with a digital clock? I won’t say I told you so, it’s ok it’s your happy place, change it to a digital clock. *Poof* Now we can set the alarm!
We don’t need to change the alarm 12:00 AM is fine, this is our happy place we are sleepy our eye lids are getting heavier and we just want to make sure the alarm works. Okay; our alarm is set, we are happy but weary and our eyelids are so heavy. It’s ok as they are closed and we are in our happy place.
On the count of three I want you to fall asleep, a deep deep sleep until the alarm goes off, ready 1 … it is such a nice place …. 2 we are so so sleepy … 3
Sweet Dreams!
That arrow like whistling noise you hear coming from the long and narrow hallway ahead is un-fortunately not that of a young maiden trying to woo you.
The Black Phantom edition has arrived.
…Behind you.
Run! Bad Guy
(halo)
Go straight to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.
Thanks David!
The cheque is in the mail 😉
If you notice this notice you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing
Go left.
—>
KEEP YOUR ‘SOLES’ OFF THIS STONE.
Go straight to the Nexus
Do not pass GO
Do not collect 200 Souls
oh right…it’s already been done…
“Stop, DEMON TIME!”
You will need plenty of these to finish this game.
___________
[___________]
{=========}
.-‘ ‘-.
/ \
/_________________\
| _ _ _ |
||\(_ |_)||_)||\ ||
,.–. ,.–. ||~\_)| || \|| \||
// \ \ // \ \ |_________________|
\\ \ / \\ \ / | |
`’–‘ `’–‘ ‘—————–‘
DOH !!!
What happened !?!?!?!
It looked fine when I pressed Submit !!!
It’s always amusing when someone tries this… Sorry Kane!
Better??
___________
[___________]
{=========}
.-‘ ‘-.
/_________________\
| _ _ _ |
||\(_ |_)||_)||\ ||
||~\_)| || \|| \||
|_________________|
| |
‘—————–‘
What’s a guy to do??
Well you can kinda make it out….It’s basically a container of Asprin.
Last chance…here’s another I cooked up earlier.
_____
[IIIII]
)”””(
/ \
/ \
|`-…-‘|
|asprin |
_ |`-…-‘j _
(\)`-.___.(I) _(/)
(I) (/)(I)(\)
(I)
Hey David, any chance I can show you what it’s MEANT to look like via email, or do you get the gist of it??
Entry must be via the comments only, sorry!
Cause I really wanna win…Last attempt !!
,.–. ,.–.
// \ \ // \ \
\\ \ / \\ \ /
`’–‘ `’–‘
[IIIII]
)”””(
/ \
/ \
|`-…-‘|
|asprin |
|`-…-‘j _
(\)`-.___.(I) _(/)
(I) (/)(I)(\)
(I)
ARGGGGHHHHHHH !!!!
FOR F*&%# OLD KING DORAN’S SAKE !!!!
Beware The Convention Ahead, Must Equip Poncho!
Witty
Part of Speech: adjective
Definition: funny and clever
Synonyms: amusing, bright, brilliant, campy, crazy*, diverting, droll, entertaining, epigrammatic, facetious, fanciful, gay, humorous, ingenious, intelligent, jocose, jocular, joshing, keen, lively, original, penetrating, piercing, piquant, quick-witted, ridiculous, scintillating, screaming, slapstick, sparkling, waggish, whimsical
Antonyms: serious, unamusing, unfunny
If you were a Demon, where would you hide?
I’d probably be behind you. Enjoy!
I’m Rick James, b!tch… Enjoy yourself! The DARKNESS is coming, what did the hand say to the face? SCHLAPPPPPP! Heh ha ha ha, Charlie Murphy!
Day 1, Note 2:
Just got this game..
I love Final Fantasy, It’s just the best game ever..
Has chocobo’s and characters with long crazy hair and swords..
…
Huh? This is the wrong game?
Oh…
..
.
Day 1, Note 2:
Just made an ass out of myself, and accidentally dropped the note.
…
..
..
Great first impressions.
Shrieking and snarling before the majesty of the light, all demons cower in fear of the Blade of Angels, the mightiest of all weapons. Only the greatest champions of the age are worthy enough to wield it. To prove your worth and take up the blade pay $9.95 via gamerpoints or credit card now!
Your sword must be at least this long to enter:
Oh it was missing the next line! I think using angled brackets broke it
Your sword Must be at least this long to enter:
———————————————–
Help! I’m trapped in an alternate dimension overrun by bloodthirsty demons!
i give up i never win these things
Your innards freeze, your mind it bubbles;
Full of empty, trivial troubles.
Your flesh will burn, you skin it peels;
How you long for my swift boot heel.
You will dance on my strings and receive no succour
I live only to make you suffer!
It is for you that the bell will toll
Now give me a copy of Demon Souls!
As you read through this competition post,
What is it that you desire most?
A witty remark to impress your peers,
Which will bring with it plaudits and cheers?
A comment which will prove your competitors’ demise,
And lead you to the ultimate prize?
Or merely a thank you which is long overdue,
For the great prizes provided by Kotaku?
Whatever your motive, to reach your goal
You must enter this competition about a Demon’s Soul
Niether sarcasm or pop culture have been successful against this enemy. I wish I could be more helpful but 2 of the ghosts left behind here are mine.
.!luos rouy nekat evah lliw uoy dniheb nomed eht ,siht rehphiced uoy emit eht yb tub siht rof yrroS
Blue is the tinge of the tear in my eyes,
White is the colour left after it dries.
Grey is the cloud hanging over my head,
Red is my face cos I want someone dead.
Purple is my fist from punching the walls,
Beige is the paint that I wished were his balls.
Green is the bile I spew from inside,
Black is the shadow in which he must hide.
Yellow is the soul of some stupid bank dood,
Empty is my wallet so I cannot buy food!
(bit of a sob story, but I had to rant.. what a c**t of a day!)
Yesterday came close
Honourable mention!
I lost all my souls.
Black world tendency,
About to get much harder,
Probably won’t win.
Died another time,
At least I have my best friend,
Wait, where did you go?
Did you know that Demon’s Souls was programmed entirely with Adobe Flash? We felt that it was-FIND TEENS NOW IN YOUR CITY! ALL YOU EVER WANTED! NO FRIENDS HERE? WOMEN IN JAPAN WANT TO MEET YOU AND THINK YOUR HOBBIES ARE SO SEXY! (OR KAWAII! ^.^)-so just redeem that code for extra content as our thanks to you for playing Demon’s Souls!
The difficulty curve of this stage is comparable to the amount of sleep you’ll lose playing it.
The writer is calling from INSIDE THE WALL!
Mmmmmm … Soul of Demon…
“Float like a storm beast, bite like a leech. Your knight won’t hit what his sword can’t reach. Now you see them, now you don’t. You think you will, but I know you won’t.”
“There are two things that are hard to hit for any slayer, that’s a shadow lurker and this Demon’s player.”
~ Boletarian Ali
Beware the Great and Powerful Frank
Look I thought we had a deal! You don’t comment and I can finally win something in my life; don’t make me get my mum!
It’s a trap! Picking up the Black Phantom Edition devours your life!
Get back to work!
This isn’t a competition it is a lie, created by the man to hold us in line and not raid the Kotaku offices looking for all the awesome cookies
So remember Demon Souls doesnt exist and Kotaku has awesome cookies
So why the hell are you trying to enter this stupid competition and go steal Kotaku cookies!
I can tell you what Im doing 😉
Purple-Monkey-Dishwasher!
“Abandon hope all ye who platinum here”
I find my lack of wit in this post disturbing.
If you can read this then you can play the hardest of hardest games.
Oh it’s you.
I’ll just fetch the toothpaste and my pet spider monkey, and then we can begin.
By the way, I’m going to be on top this time.
I played Demon’s Souls with Sony’s MOVE and all I got was this lousy bloodstain.
You seem to be having some trouble, would you like Luigi to come in and finish the level for you?
Dude, seriously, just take the blue pill…
Caution trap ahead.
He lies.
What?!?! You lie!
Me never.
Seriously trap ahead, big scary dude with an axe.
Lies!! It’s a fluffy bunny and a puppy.
Seen moments before the plays gets smashed by a fluffy bunny/puppy hybrid wielding a massive axe.
Never believe the comments!
This game is not the cure to bieber fever you have been searching for.
The most I can hope for is an honourable mention.
How long dare you dream
to see those sights
best left unseen?
How far will you go
to see those places
nobody should know?
How solemn will it be
when you are alone
and lost at sea?
It wont be long
We’ll sing our songs
And wait for
inevitability
The Cake Is A Lie.
Pants down and assume the position demon’s souls hurts soooo good.
Hello Mighty Warrior, you must destroy the Nexus Core but Beware the Makron – Wait where am i Boletaria. Oh Ok i must ask you ignore this message i seem to have gotten lost, must have taken a wrong turn at Planet Albuquerque
Why do we bother?
Everytime we try, someone wins
So chances are, you won’t either
Why not take a break? You can pause the game by pressing +.
You never bend, you never break
You seem to know just what it takes
You’re a fighter
It’s in the blood, it’s in the will
It’s in the mighty hands of steel
When you’re standin’ your ground
And you never get hit when your back’s to the wall
Gonna fight to the end and you’re takin’ it all!!
You got the touch!
You got the power!
“Jump!”
Blacksmith Boldwin’s Boletarian Bangers – A Specialist Smithy’s Sausage
Fresh meat served daily
If you can read this sign than your overqualified
TITS OR GTFO
If you can read this you are already dead.
Sorry.
Call me, 555-URDED
Can I haz Cheezburger?
Take me with you! I can be your pet… rock…
I could grow up and go to a school of… rock…
and then you could rock out with your…. rock out…
Ohhhhh Sparkly!
Everyone! I know a way which we all can win.
If everyone just use the same name and same email address, then the judge won’t be able to choose the winner and make all of us the winner instead 😉
Ok, let’s start! I propose the name: David Wildgoose and email address: editor@kotaku.com.au
This is harsh, evaluate me.
This is a courtesy notice to inform you that the warranty on your equipment has just expired. You will be joining it shortly.
Click here to see how to beat the level 5 boss
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EK2tWVj6lXw
Don’t feed the dragon.
If it bleeds, you can kill it
Everyone thinks this game is hard but most people don’t realise that they put mind powers into the game for your character to use.
Simply wave the controller around above your head in an anti clockwise direction while spinning both the analog sticks around in a clockwise direction and let the sixaxis controller do its magic be careful though you have to time the spinning of the analog sticks so they are going around at the exact same time.
Remember to wave the controller vigorously too!
Missing full stop fail!
Shouldn’t you be working?
If you’ll forgive an old demon’s soliloquy, then I have a tale of woe to tell,
Of how in the height of the demon’s solstice, I ventured forth from hell.
I sought a demon’s solace, from the crying of the damned,
A peaceful demon’s solitude, in this brutal, violent land.
In a quiet demon’s solarium, I heard the most wonderous sound;
After many years of lonliness, a demon’s Soulmate had at last been found.
To this demon’s solicitations she came, in her beauty and her poeticism,
but as we talked in to the night, alas, I let slip a demon’s solecism.
A mere slip of a Demon’s solemn tongue, a quip softened by years of war and rough elecution;
but as she walked away in disgust from my lighthearted jest, I learned that a pun is never the Demon’s solution.
Three reasons why demons will love your soul.
Dark Fantasy
Your thoughts are ever-so-grim. Dirty. Dark. Brutal. Demons have destroyed the world, and the naughty naughty things they see prancing throughout your perverted mind are like candy to them. Tales have been told of an endless troop of dirty-minded individuals such as yourself trapped in some kind of twilight zone between the living and the dead, relentlessly searching for an escape, and dying over and over again in their struggle.
They can smell the fetid water in the dank, cobblestone torture dungeons of your mind. They can feel your ubiquitous, barely contained lust embracing them like a fog with your every thought. Your mind is broken, littered with the decayed, rusting remnants of innocence. Your twisted thoughts are bleak and imposing and utterly, deathly cold. Almost everyone you meet ought to kill you, and every demon will want you.
Building a Character
Like any self-respecting indivdual, demons enjoy a host for shaping their appearance to their desires. However, they are limited to the one class out of ten you chose from at the outset, forced to sport your chosen range of skills and abilities and often adapting to your fight style. Lucky for the demons, however, there are plenty of options within a host to explore: if you’re a melee fighter you might be possessed and turned into a demon commanding the very spawn of Hell; or perhaps you might be lightly mutated, relying instead on nimble pyrotechnics.
The way the possession system works, a demon is not stuck with the skills you initially chose. Your class is but a starting point from which they’re free to mould your outer shell as they see fit. Add to this the wealth of options a demon in Boletaria holds, and it’s unlikely you’ll ever want to see your own face again. More power to the demons.
Mastering a Challenge
Combat is never easy. Especially at the start of a demon’s life, and as they move into each new areas, pretty much every perverted warrior they face can kill them quickly if they’re not on your game. Typical combat practice for a demon throws plenty of fodder their way early on as they grow accustomed to their unholy powers. Here, even the lowliest objectophiliac can slice a young demon up with a couple of hits.
Combat is never about mashing buttons or delivering powerful combo attacks. Rather, it’s about precise timing of each swing of their claws, about positioning your wings effectively, about knowing when to retreat and recover or call upon imps, about managing your stamina, and about exploiting each enemy’s weaknesses. It’s deliberate and tactical and demanding. The demons you face have fought through and know all of this. You will die if you’re not properly prepared.
So, for the unititiated out there, have I convinced you that this game will foreit your soul?
Remember to take breaks for the bathroom and to eat and sleep – maintaining dignity is essential.
Materialise into the punishing world of Demon’s Souls, your sword wielded and shield raised, and prepare to…ROLL! Roll, roll, roll! This is your most powerful weapon! THERE’S A DEMON! QUICK, ROLL! Ha-ha! A giant blob monster! ROLL! Dragon! ROLL! Some planks of wood! Roll into the planks of wood! Satisfying! A door! Roll! What an entrance! A wall! ROLL! A mote of dust! ROLL! Eat dust…dust! Uh, The Old One! For the love of God, ROLL!
Whoops. Uh, see you in the next draw.