How To Justify Putting A Video Of Your Babies On A Major Gaming Website


While it may seem like a video of me singing to my two children as they bounce along to a song will.i.am did for Sesame Street a few years back, this is a video about SoulCalibur V. Or possibly frog butt.

As the proud father of twin eight-month-old boys, I am constantly looking for ways to integrate my children into my work. It’s one of the main reasons we had them, after all. I sit them on the floor nearby while I play, leave active controllers near them just in case inspiration hits. One of them actually played Twisted Metal the other day by chewing on the controller, but I didn’t have my camera charged and the opportunity was lost. Still, good on Eat Sleep Play for choosing one of the more delicious buttons for firing missiles.

Have you watched the video yet? Totally about SoulCalibur V, right? No?

Perhaps some set-up will help.

On Saturday morning, around 1am, I purchased a new entertainment centre from Walmart. What do we put in entertainment centers? That’s right, video games.

I wanted something sleek and sexy to replace the 100 pound wooden monstrosity that’s been taking up great tracts of my living room real estate for the past six years or so. I believe I’ve posted a picture of it here before. Ah yes, here.

I got home from Walmart around 2am and decided that was a perfect time of day to tear apart my entire living room and put it back together again. This was a monumentally bad decision.

I spent the next seven hours breathing dust, tangled in wires, buried under Styrofoam packing materials and developing massive allen wrench blisters on my thumb and forefinger. At 9am I fell asleep on the floor, curled up between my new entertainment centre and the old one. I am almost positive that’s how I will one day be found dead.

Welcome to the comedy block, kids!

Two hours later I woke up, checked my email, and fell asleep in my computer chair. An hour later my wife-figure woke me up. It was time for her to go to work, and the children were mine. There was no time to clean up the clutter I had gleefully tossed all about the living area; it was goo time.

So what you are seeing here is me desperately trying to stay awake while keeping two babies so occupied they forgot they were supposed to be crying and spurting bodily fluids from their diapers at regular intervals. We must have sung this damn song 30 times in a row.

All this because I wanted to have a nice place to play video games.

I won’t apologise for my singing; it’s OK to sing when you are deliriously tired or drunk at a Bethesda E3 party.

If all else fails, Archer and Seamus here were conceived at BlizzCon 2010 and born during E3 2011, and that’s about as gaming related as you can get without one of your parents being a copy of SoulCalibur V.


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