Backhanded Box Quotes: 'I Hope The Man Who Created This Game Burns In Hell'

Welcome to "Backhanded Box Quotes" a collection of super pissed-off user reviews from people just like you! Whoa, whoa, don't take that personal.

This week, Backhanded Box Quotes looks at four video games which all committed the unpardonable sin of releasing in the past two weeks.

SSX

Released: February 28

Critic: Mensrea (Metacritic)

"If they cut any more corners, there would be nothing left. No splitscreen, no skiing?! WTF."

• "I hope the man who created this game burns in hell."

Score: 2

Asura's Wrath

Released: February 21

Critic: Meph (Metacritic).

"It's some kind of an interactive japanese anime with some short and poor session of play between them."

• "i hate qte, it's not fun and prevent us to really appreciate the story.... and above all they have no impact on how the stroy evolve, it's just scoring"

• "... very boring, allways the same session of playing that includes poor railshooting, beat'em all and boss fight that you can resume in dodging until the small weakness window allow to hit him."

Score: 3

SoulCalibur V

Released: January 31

Critic: Bowlmbiri (Metacritic)

"Single Playing sucks as bad as the arcade game AMY, it is not challenging and does not have anything new or entertaining..."

Score: 4

NeverDead

Released: January 31

Critic: MaxxSwan13 (Metacritic)

"All the reviewers and critics who give this game a bad score are retards."

• "This game is f*cking awesome."

• "So hardcore and fun."

Score: 10


Comments

    The Asuras Wrath comments are spot on.

      I for one am tired of "beat'em all" games...

    I've heard good things about SSX. It's the first sports game I've seen in awhile that has caught my attention.

    And rofl at the NeverDead review.

    I'm predicting the Mass Effect 3 comments already.
    "This game has DLC, therefor it's terrible!".

      i'm waiting for
      "The story doesn't go exactly as a i planned it in my fanfiction! -2 out of 10!"

    the games available at the moment make me constipated

    I'll add a one for SSX:

    "I hope whoever thought the 'deadly descents' parts were good is taken out and raped to death by men with barbed wire condoms"

    They seriously make me consider taking the game back to eb, since I have that option for a few days.

      Really?

      I haven't bought it yet but these seemed really cool.

      Is it a difficulty thing or are they no fun?

      Barbed wire condom? Somebody's been watching Human Centipede 2...

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